Edward wasn't sure what to make of this at all. He had promised himself he wouldn't do this again. That he wouldn't ask to be used and treated roughly again. And here he was doing it again. But he didn't mind. Somehow, it felt different.

Looking up into Greg's eyes, all he could see was raw desire. As Greg thrust into his mouth and throat, giving him exactly what he had asked for, yet stopping at the point where it could possibly hurt him, all he could sense was love. Greg wasn't lying about finding him attractive and loving him. He really, truly did.

And that love didn't take away from the appeal of rough sex, of being used as an object of pleasure. It added to it.

It made no sense at all. Edward had been convinced that this fantasy was not him. That it was based on his insecurities and inability to like himself. And yet... even knowing Greg loved him, he wanted it. It felt good. It felt good to be desired.

Greg's hands tightened in Edward's hair, and he took Greg's big cock as far into his throat as he could, tilting his head back a little to increase the pressure and eye contact. Greg groaned as he finished in Edward's mouth.

And Edward felt... complete. Not used or inhuman or broken... but complete.

Greg sat down on the massage bench, panting heavily, and looked down at Edward. He extended his hand, which Edward seized, helping himself to his feet.

“That was fun,” Greg said, reaching for a warm towel to clean himself with. “Ready for your turn?”

Edward looked at the clock. “Not here, we're almost up. But let's get dressed, go down to the beach and...” He gently traced a fingertip down Greg's chest before leaning in and kissing him softly.

Greg let out a soft, low moan. “Hmm... It's been a while since you said anything like that.”

“What do you mean? I've started sex lately,” Edward replied, feeling somewhat indignant.

“No, it's not about starting. It's about... us. It's been a while since you showed any interest in taking charge, in seizing what's yours. You've been so submissive. It's refreshing,” Greg explained.

Edward nodded. “Yeah, I guess things have been a little skewed. I suppose I... didn't think I deserved to boss you around.”

“What do you mean?” Greg asked, his tone of voice changing. “What do you mean you didn't think you deserved to boss me? You're my husband. If you want to do something like that, we talk about it, we work something out. I'd let you be in charge, you know that.”

“I guess that's why I never asked for it. I knew you'd agree to it and... well... it didn't seem right that you could be played with like that. You're your own man,” Edward replied nervously.

“As are you,” Greg said coldly.

“Yeah, but... You don't deserve to be used. I didn't deserve to boss you about or hurt you. It just felt wrong to even suggest it,” Edward tried to explain.

“And you thought I deserved to boss you? To slap you and use you and call you names? That's fucked up, Eddie. I mean it's okay if you're getting into all this—”

“And I am,” Edward interrupted hastily. “I didn't think I was. I thought it was all about feeling unworthy too but... I suppose I really do like it.” He didn't need to discover or realize how fucked up it was when the only reason was self-loathing. He knew that all along. Now what mattered was reassurance. To reassure Greg that he still wanted it. Because he really did.

Greg nodded. “You're sure of that now? You're sure it's not because of anything else? Cause when I thought it was just that you were getting into something, I was very happy to help you out and have fun. But now you're telling me it was some sort of bizarre emotional self-harm and... I can't be a party to that. I did this because it made you happy. And I won't do it if it's making you unhappy... Even if you want to be unhappy.”

Edward shook his head. “I really enjoyed it this time. And I knew you loved me, and were caring for me, and I still enjoyed it. I think perhaps the power stuff is still a turn on for me, whether it comes from a place of self-love or not.”

Greg nodded again. “If you promise me that, I will believe you,” he said, leaning in and kissing Edward passionately. “Now, let's get dressed and go to the beach.”

***

But despite constantly reassuring Edward that everything was fine, Greg became slowly quiet and sullen over the course of the day. And it just seemed to get worse. By dinner, Greg was oddly withdrawn.

Edward wasn't sure whether to confront him about it or not. After all, they were both working on some serious personal things. And there had been some big revelations and discussions recently. Maybe Greg just needed to work on things?

But as the evening rolled on, Edward knew something was wrong. Every time he said something Greg would just nod or make a noise. Every time he tried to touch him, Greg flinched. This wasn't like him at all. Greg was the extroverted one.

“Are you sure you're okay?” Edward asked as Greg looked down into his plate and began eating slowly and reluctantly.

“I will be, I'm just working things out,” Greg replied.

And Edward deeply wanted to believe him. But he knew something was different, something was changing.

He tried to tell himself that the change was just what Greg said it was, it was just him growing and learning as a person. But it was too late. The fear was creeping up again. Was Greg sad to be there? Lonely? Pining for a lover back in the States? Edward poured himself his second glass of wine. He had to talk about this.

***

Walking back into their room, Edward shut the door, drew a deep breath, then stopped himself. What was he thinking? What was he doing? He had trusted this man for nearly two decades, the private investigator had found nothing, they had a family together... It wasn't that. It was just that the resort had been a bad idea. A really, really bad idea.

“I can never get anything right,” Edward groaned, wondering if another glass of wine would make him feel better or worse.

“What did you say?” Greg asked.

“Nothing... Nothing at all,” Edward replied, shaking his head and smiling as genuinely as he could manage.

Greg smiled back. “Well, we have a busy day catching the flight tomorrow, so let's get some rest.”

Sitting up, Edward took out his phone for the first time since they'd called to let the kids know they'd arrived safe and sound. He knew there were no hard and fast rules about phones, but the resort recommended disconnecting from social media and other people for a while, to help reconnect with your partner. But the week was all but over. Just another day of therapy, packing their bags, and a late-night flight.

Besides, he couldn't really sleep. His social media accounts had blown up with messages, which kept him busy for a bit. And then, when he still couldn't sleep, he checked his emails. Most seemed to be spam, but then something caught his eye.

“Edward, I have to talk to you.”

It was from a personal email address. Edward hesitated before opening it, wondering if it was some sort of a phishing scam. Or, more likely, if it was yet another anonymous message, bothering him and trying to turn him against his husband. But something compelled him to click on it. It was in a lot more depth than any email of that nature he had received before.

“Hi Edward, thanks for reading this.

You don't know me, and I don't really know you. But there's something I need you to know about Greg, so I had to track you down and tell you.”

Edward glanced over at Greg's sleeping form and turned over a little to hide the screen from him anyway as he began to scroll down.

“Greg is not the guy you think he is. I don't know how long he has been doing this for, all I know is that for the past four or five months he's been seeing me and we've been having a great time. Only last time he stayed logged into his work email at my place and I found out he has a husband: you.

This was super casual, and I never meant to hurt anyone. Maybe it's just me or maybe there are other guys. I just felt that if I were you, I would want to know.

Sorry you had to find out this way.

Chad.”

Edward paused and re-read the message. It echoed the words of the haunting texts and emails he had experienced, but this time it was different. This time it was detailed, and it was not anonymous. This felt like a real person. Was it some sort of a cruel joke? Someone trying to cause trouble? He didn't want to believe it, but those doubts had never truly gone away. He found it much easier to trust his initial fears than the voice telling him to trust Greg.

No... But the private investigator hadn't found anything. Unless... Unless Greg had discovered the search and missing money earlier. Unless he had known all along and just acted differently to throw Edward off his scent.

Looking down at how peacefully his husband was sleeping, Edward didn't know what to believe. He was going in circles. Was he paranoid or trusting his gut? Should he let it all go and ignore it, or would that be naive?

Unable to sleep, he spent the rest of the night scrolling through social media, trying to distract himself with videos and articles until it was time to get up.

***

Their week was drawing to a close and all Edward could think about was what he would do when he got home. As they began a couples’ yoga session that always left him feeling highly inflexible, he tried to decide. He had two options, as far as he could see, and both had potential to be terrible.

He could confront Greg, which would be difficult, but the right move if Greg was actually cheating on him. But it could also undo all their hard work here if it was wrong. A huge reason for coming there was to put to bed his own paranoia and undo the harm done by hiring a private investigator to chase his husband down. And they'd be back at square one if he did it again.

On the other hand, he could pretend he had never seen the email, act like it was all fine, and just get back to life, hoping it would all go away. Which would be great for them both if the email was lying. But if it was all true... then he would be knowingly living with and enabling a cheater. A cheater who had gone out of his way to make Edward feel like a piece of crap who was losing his mind.

Neither option was great.

Watching his husband bend so easily into yet another pose the human body was not designed for, Edward was overwhelmed by his love for Greg. This was the man who had taken him around the world. Who had married him and adopted children with him. Who had taught him so much.

“I love you,” he said as Greg leaned in to help him get into the same pose.

Greg paused and smiled. “You know... it's been so long since you last said that. This trip was a fantastic idea.” Greg leaned in and kissed Edward lightly. Edward felt as though he would melt.

“Really?” he asked.

“I can't remember the last time,” Greg said, “but I have been slacking as well. And I love you too.”

Edward flung his arms around Greg's neck and hugged him. Feeling Greg's hands move up to hold him and stroke his back made him feel so much more at ease, so much more at peace internally. Could he risk sacrificing this? “Was work seriously all that was getting to you?” he asked as the other couples began packing up, eager to get back home.

Greg shook his head. “No, you were too.”

Edward felt himself tense up. “I was?”

“Sorry, that came out wrong,” Greg corrected. “Not you yourself. But... just how you were. I was working so hard to make you happy, and you weren't. And that hurt. I thought it was something wrong with you at first... But this place proved me wrong. I was thinking about what I would do and think in your situation. I wasn't thinking about you at all. And now when I get back I'm going to work twice as hard at making you happy. Actually happy.”

Edward smiled softly and hugged Greg tighter again. “Thank you. That... that actually means a lot to me.” And yet why didn't the nagging voice in the back of his mind shut up? It all added up.

Greg seemed much better, much happier, much more relaxed. But was it the effect of the resort? Or was it his anticipation as he knew he would soon see someone else, someone he actually cared for?

***

Getting home was so bittersweet. It was morning in the USA by the time the taxi dropped them off at the front door. Their house looked so beautiful. The nice suburb, the white picket fence he had always dreamed of.

As he embraced Jill and Tom, and kissed his mother on the cheek, Edward knew that his decisions would affect more people than just himself and his family.

He and Greg moved upstairs to unpack their bags and on the stairs his eyes lingered on every family photo, on every framed doodle, on every little award and certificate on the walls. He bit his lip and told himself to be brave.

“Greg, I've been meaning to ask you,” he began. But then he saw that photo, the four of them together, a family. He couldn't do this. If he was wrong, the accusation could hurt Greg deeply and undo all the hard work they had both put in at True Love Resort. And if he was right? Then he would have to be the bigger man. Sometimes a father had to accept a sacrifice so as to protect his family.

“I've been meaning to ask you to help me set up that new bookshelf,” Edward said with a smile.