The entire commute home today I couldn’t relax. Usually on the subway, I was able to pop in my headphones and listen to something and chill out for a couple of precious hours. Some days it was audio books, since I usually never had time to sit down and actually read a book. You know, what with the fact that I never had any downtime. On other days, I would unwind by picking one of the many playlists I had created on my iTunes account.

Today, though, none of that was working.

My brain was still working overtime over the whole meeting with Oliver from this morning. I still couldn’t believe he was expecting Max and me to pretend to be more of a couple on the air. Who does that? I mean who goes around pretending they’re a couple so that more people will like them. It made no sense to me.

Were we getting better being around each other and working together?

Sure, but you needed to consider that we were much happier when our time together was over.

And, yeah, of course Max was nice to look at. So it wasn’t a hardship or anything. Was I attracted to him physically? Of course I was. I was a red-blooded heterosexual woman who hadn’t been touched by a man—by choice at this point—in a long time. But I really, really didn’t like him.

Whenever he opened his mouth, I wanted to punch him. It was as simple as that. But then he smiled that smile that only he could pull off without looking like a complete dick, and a part of me wanted to kiss the stupid smirk off his face too. It was getting frustrating.

And now he wanted me to trust him.

Yeah, right.

Sighing as that uncomfortable thought popped into my head, I stepped off the subway car at my stop. The stairs leading out and up to the street were semi-crowded and stuffy, but once I was outside, I got a blast of cool air, thanks to the perfect spring weather we’d been having. At least I could enjoy the short walk from the subway stop to my building, which was only a block and a half away.

The walk was full of people I had known all my life. From Ernie who ran the bodega I usually did my grocery shopping at. To Arjun, who ran the corner store that was at the corner of my block but liked to call it a haberdashery, whatever that meant. Then if the weather was nice enough, I could also run in to what I liked to call The Three Stooges. They weren’t really Larry, Moe, and Curly, even though together, these three ladies sometimes acted like they were. One of them was my grandmother and the other two older ladies were women from our building. The three of them had been friends for longer than I’ve been alive. They usually sat with their folding chairs outside under the huge dogwood tree whenever the weather permitted. My abuela was usually the quiet and reserved one out of the trio. While the other two, Ms. Cavanaugh and Ms. Cooper, wouldn’t know how to mind their business if you paid them to. And even though none of these people were related to me by blood— except my grandmother, of course—they all were my family. That’s what living in this neighborhood was like, and I loved it. Not only the sense of community, but also the feeling of family and that we had each other’s backs. All of it felt like home to me and made me smile no matter how many times I had to field questions about my non-existent social life or love life.

And speak of the devil, the first of The Three Stooges, Ms. Cavanaugh, saw me coming down the block and announced my arrival with, “Here comes trouble.”

“You can say that again,” Ms. Cooper chimed in.

Finally, my grandmother spoke. “Mi niña, you’re home early, no?”

“Yes, I’m home a little earlier than usual, but no big deal. It’s not like we need to alert the media or anything, ladies.”

They all giggled like a bunch of schoolgirls instead of the seventy-something-year-olds they actually were. I laughed a little too, because everyone knew in this neighborhood that if you wanted to find out some dirt on someone, anyone, you came to these three ladies. They had the goods on everyone around here. It was pretty awesome how they were able to do it, seeing as how they never went anywhere other than this curb and probably hundreds of doctor appointments between them.

I was never so busy that I couldn’t give them some time either. So I popped a squat on the arm of my abuela’s chair to chat with them for a few minutes…and yeah, maybe get some of the latest gossip. I was only human for chrissakes!

“How are you all doing today? Any news to report?”

Cutting right to the chase, Ms. Cavanaugh cleared her throat, looked around and then over her shoulder just in case anyone else was listening. Like it would have stopped her. “Well you heard about Linda Horne in apartment 3A?” I answered no to her question. Then Ms. Cooper shook her head in disbelief while my grandmother crossed herself. “Oh, honey, it’s just awful. Awful!”

“What happened?” I asked.

“You know I’m not one to talk,” Ms. Cavanaugh said so seriously and I almost laughed right in her face. “Anyway, I’m sure you already know how her husband Jerry supposedly can’t work because of a back injury, right?”

“Not really, but go ahead.”

“Well there he his, home all day and night for the past few months while Linda is out working two jobs to make ends meet since his disability ran out. She feels so bad for him that one day last week she decides to suprise him by picking him up his favorite to-go meal from that Polish place over on Greepoint…do you know it?”

She barely gave me time to tell her no.

Ms. Cooper decided to give some insight on the matter. “They have the best goulash but their pierogies are terrible.”

“You think so? I’m not that fond of their pierogies. They’re a little on the soggy side, if you ask me. I think whoever is making the dough is probably not polish, if you know what I’m saying.”

“Then who could it be?” My grandmother asked, finally deciding to pipe in to their side conversation.

If I didn’t interrupt them now, they would probably never get back to the original topic.

“Ladies, wait, get back to Linda Horne in 3A, please.”

“Oh, right, right,” Ms. Cavanaugh said. She put her hand to her chest as if she was about to have a heart attack. “So she runs home early to surprise him and to bring him his food. When she unlocks the door to their apartment, she sees Jerry on the couch having a grand old time with their neighbor, Shawna from 3C.”

“Oh dear,” Ms. Cooper said.

My grandmother’s reaction, which even after probably hearing this story a million times by now, was just as shocked. “Por el amor de Dios.”

“According to Nancy Stankiewiecz who lives on the same floor, she said that Shawna was on her knees and barking like a dog while Jerry was behind her doing who knows what to her.”

“Jesus Christ,” I mumbled but my grandmother heard it and still smacked me lightly on my arm. “So what happened? Did she kick him out?”

“Kick who out, dear?” Ms. Cavanaugh asked.

“Mrs. Horne, did she kick Jerry out for having an affair with the neighbor or what?”

Ms. Cooper answered. “Oh no, no, no, it’s not the first time he’s done this sort of thing, you know. Plus Linda said it was more pierogies for her that night.”

“Those must be some damn good pierogies then,” I said while shaking my head in disbelief.

We all started to laugh at that and the ridiculousness of the outcome of poor Linda Horne in 3A, until we saw a familiar and unwelcome face turn the corner and come up our street.

“Here’s that Joey character coming again for Eddie,” Ms. Cavanaugh told everyone in a hushed breath. She tsked a few times and then said, “Such a shame.”

My grandmother suddenly got really quiet, which only happened when she was either very upset or very nervous. In this case, she was both. It made me that much more upset on her behalf that Eddie was hanging out with Joey. And I already had my worry card full with this Oliver stuff on my mind and placing my trust with Max. I sure as hell didn’t need anything else to add to that right now. Especially not this snot-nosed mojon who thought he was going to audition for the role of “hoodlum number three” for the next edition of Law & Order.

Before he got too close to us, Eddie came jogging out of the building and down the steps. He had such a huge smile on his face that were it not for the fact that I knew where he was going, I would have thought he had won the lottery or something. He had on his usual outfit or variation of it: jeans, graphic t-shirt, bomber jacket, and a backwards baseball hat. Seriously, my little brother wore this outfit so often that we joked that he probably slept in it everyday.

“Hey, Daph, why are you home so early?” he asked. He bent low and gave our abuela a kiss on the crown of her head.

I rolled my eyes. “I’m not that early, geez. Where are you off to anyway? Will you be back for dinner?”

Joey sidled up next to Eddie. They did that bro-hug thing that guys did sometimes and then Joey said to me, “Damn, girl, why so many questions? Eddie’s a grown ass man, he can take care of himself.”

“Mind your business,” I answered without sparing him a glance. “Eddie, where are you going and will you be back for dinner?”

Joey smacked his lips together and with the attitude fit for a king, said, “Don’t tell me to mind my business, bitch.”

Normally, someone calling me a bitch would piss me off to no end. But coming from an idiot like Joey, for some reason it didn’t resonate as much. And even though everything and everyone around us came to a screeching halt, I couldn’t begin to be bothered by his go-to insult because he was just so incosequential. Ms. Cavanaugh, Ms. Cooper, and my grandmother were all beside themselves on my behalf though. Each of them slowly starting to mutter and break up the silence with how they couldn’t believe what he said and how he was acting.

“All three of you can mind your business, too. Bunch of old busy bodies got nothing better to do than to gossip and talk shit.” Joey took a breath, licked his lips and went to say something else but Eddie stepped in front of him to cut him off.

“Everyone relax.” He patted Joey on the shoulder. “Yo, man, I’ll meet you over by the park in a few.”

“Yeah, right, sure, bro.” Joey was eyeing me up and down with a grin even more ludicrous than Max’s.

He didn’t scare me, though. I stood with my hands on my hips looking as bored as ever until he was out of sight. Then, I tore into Eddie. “Are you serious? You’re going to let him call your sister a bitch and insult your grandmother and her friends and still go and hang out with that trash? Like you’re okay with all of that? What the hell, Eddie?”

“Daph, he didn’t mean it. He’s just acting that way because you had an attitude with him from the moment he showed up. Why can’t you act nice for once with him? Did you ever think of that?” He took a breath and kept going. “You know just because you got this new job on TV doesn’t make you the boss of everything around here. You’re still from Queens. Not an actual queen.”

“Is that right?” I asked but didn’t want an answer, because how dare he throw my career choice back in my face. Especially since he damn well knew he was a big reason why I took the job with Max to begin with. “Well, let me explain how all of this works. That,” I pointed towards the direction of where Joey had stalked off to, “is a grade-A piece of shit that is not your friend. All he’s going to do is get you into trouble. He’s bad news, Eddie. We, on the other hand, are the good guys and are the ones actually looking out for you.”

“Stop it with your mommy-complex, Daphne. You’re not my mom, and I can do whatever I want!”

Eddie barely spared me another glance before fast walking down the sidewalk to catch up to Joey. I wanted to yell after him, but it was no use. The betrayal and anger I felt coursing through my veins made me feel like my head was going to explode. He had always been an annoying little brother who I loved to death, but nowadays he had this invisible chip on his shoulder that I couldn’t ever grasp. It was so frustrating to know he was so full of talent and smarts in one aspect of his life, but in this part, he was completely clueless. And it worried me more and more of where it was headed.

“Mija, no vayas tras él,” my abuela said quietly. She took my hand in hers softly. “Don’t chase after him, Daphne. Come on; let’s go inside. I’ll fix you something to eat.”

I hadn’t even noticed that she had folded her chair back up already. It made me even more upset that we had ruined her socializing time with her friends. Who, when I glanced over my shoulder to see what they were up to, saw that they were super quiet. Too quiet. The kind of quiet that told me they were going to be gossiping to everyone up and down this block about what they just witnessed.

Great. Because that was exactly what I needed.

I sighed feeling the weight of the world was on my shoulders. Knowing that I had just enough to time to eat a little dinner with my grandmother, take a shower, get dressed, and then meet Max at some new bar in the West Village by nine o’clock to scope it out before we taped a show there tomorrow night, it was all too much at that exact moment. It wasn’t often that I admitted it to anyone, much less myself, but I felt overwhelmed and I thought I might cry out of frustration. Frustration over my brother, frustration over my schedule and situation at work with Max and my boss, and frustration over all the things I couldn’t control. But like everything else in my life, I would keep on keeping on.

Barely sparing Ms. Cavanaugh and Ms. Cooper a glance, I wished them both a good night and said, “Let’s go have some dinner, abuela.”

Because life went on whether we liked it or not, right?

Right.