Entry 14: The Boyfriend

Date: April 7, 2013

It was way past midnight when I heard a knock. I stirred in my bed, sleep still reluctant to release me from its clutches. I stretched and turned, causing the bed sheets to cling to my body.

Another knock came.

I looked up, blinking at the sleep-blurred world around me until my gaze turned to the window just above my bed. A shadowy figure was crouching on the ledge, its slim but tall body looming over me.

Panic bloomed in my chest and I hurriedly reached for my lamp and switched it on, bathing the room with faint light. Now I could clearly see who that shadowy figure was. Colin.

I got up to my knees and slid the window open. “Colin!” I whispered. “What on earth are you doing here in the middle of the night? And how did you get up here?”

He offered me his characteristic grin and expertly slipped under the sill, feet-first. He landed softly on my bed, causing it to creak a bit. He twisted around until he was able to sit cross-legged, facing me. “First off,” he said, raising a finger, “I’m here because I wanted to see you again.”

I blushed and started picking nervously at my nails. He was wearing simple clothes—dark jeans and a black National Geographic T-shirt—and yet he looked amazing, his red hair messy and green eyes bright.

And there I was, sitting merely a couple of inches away from him, looking ragged in a large T-shirt and checkered boxers. Not to mention my bed hair. Plus, my toenails still had some chipped nail polish, which I’d half-heartedly attempted to clean off before I’d gone to sleep. Ugh.

“You do know that we could’ve met up, I don’t know, when the sun is up and I don’t look…like this, right?” I asked, gesturing to my attire.

Colin reached out and tipped my chin up with his hand. He looked at me straight in the eye and said, “You look beautiful. And besides, wouldn’t it be more romantic this way?” He winked.

It was getting pretty hard not to smile. “Yeah, okay, but how did you even get up here? I don’t have a tree right beside my bedroom window to climb.”

“I was just getting to that,” he said. “Apparently the drainage pipe that runs along the side of your house works just as fine as a tree.”

I pursed my lips dubiously and said, “Part of me still can’t believe that you went through all that trouble just to see me.”

“Okay, you’ve caught me.” He raised his hands up as if he was surrendering himself. “I lied. I didn’t come here just because I wanted to see you.” His features softened with a smile. “I also came for this.” He dropped his hands and swooped in towards me for a kiss.

I let out a surprised little yelp when our lips collided, but soon I was eagerly kissing him back. He pulled me towards him so that I was sort of sitting on his lap. His fingers found their way to my hair and I was just getting into it when I heard a shrill scream.

I broke our kiss with a gasp—

—and was confused to see my alarm clock sitting on my bedside table, blinking the time and screeching at me, instead of Colin’s beautiful face.

When I realized why, I groaned and rolled over in bed to reach the off button on the clock.

It was just a dream, I thought with a sigh. I leaned back and reached up to gently brush my fingers against my lips. What did I expect? Colin wouldn’t have made the effort of going to my house in the middle of the night to kiss me, much less just to see me.

After a second or two of just lying there, thinking, I sat up and headed to the bathroom to refresh myself. When I took a good look at the mirror though, I sighed again. The dark half-moons hanging under my eyes were proof enough of last night’s insomnia, of last night’s rolling back and forth, and the endless train of thoughts.

Unfortunately, no matter how happy I was when I got home, it slowly dawned upon me while watching reruns with my mom, that maybe Colin didn’t really mean the kiss, just as he didn’t mean anything else he said or did.

Just because a guy kisses you doesn’t mean that they’ve fallen head over heels for you. It could just mean that they’re only playing with your feelings.

With that, I’d gone to bed with eyes wide-awake and a mind that argued against itself.

I spat out the toothpaste in my mouth and gargled some water. I cupped my hands under the faucet and washed my face with a splash of cold water. Then I dried myself with a towel before starting down to the kitchen, where my mom would surely be.

Our little bonding time yesterday had been cut short by dinner, and Mom wanted to finish the remaining episodes that morning.

As I entered the kitchen, Mom looked up from what she was doing. She’d been scribbling on a piece of paper before I arrived. “Just a second, Seven,” she said, turning back to what she was writing, “I’m just copying this recipe I found.”

“Ooh,” I cooed appreciatively. “What could this delightful meal be?”

“It’s fish fillet wrapped with bacon and sprinkled with rosemary. Seems worth a try,” she said. She glanced up at me from the corner of her eye and saw me lick my lips excitedly, already imagining what the food would be like.

She smiled. “Yes, I figured that would be your reaction.” She finally stopped writing and dropped the pen on the counter. “Alright, that’s that. Now let’s go watch some—”

The phone started ringing and I snapped my head towards it in surprise.

“I wonder who it could be,” my mom murmured, walking over to it in quick strides. She picked up the phone and answered, “Hello?” After a pause, she chirped, “Oh, Colin! Good morning!”

“C-Colin?” I sputtered incredulously. Why on earth would he be calling my home?

Mom ignored me and smiled into the phone. “No, it’s alright. Seven and I were just going to watch something. You know, a little mother-daughter bonding time.” She laughed. “So is there a reason why you’re calling today? Do you want me to give the phone to Seven?” She twisted around to look at me and winked.

I covered my face with both of my hands and shook my head. Oh, Mother.

From the slits between my fingers, I could see my mom’s face and the unmistakable change that took place there. Her smile slowly melted away and her eyes widened with shock. Soon, a gaping mouth was following suit. “Colin, correct me if I’m mistaken…but did you just call my daughter your…?”

I raised my eyebrows. What was going on now?

“Oh my!” she squealed. “I’m so happy for both of you! I knew that one way or another you two would end up together! I noticed it from the way you looked at each other, especially Seven, she’s—”

“Mom!” I interrupted her before she could destroy what little dignity I had left.

She took the phone away from her ear and hugged it to her chest, as if she were cradling a precious baby. “Seven,” she scolded me, “is it not bad enough that you didn’t tell me that Colin and you were already together, you have to cut me off and—”

“Together?” I choked out. “Where’d you get that idea?”

“From Colin,” she said defensively, pointing at the phone in her hand.

I grabbed it without a second thought and bellowed at the speaker, “Colin!”

On the other side of the line, his voice drawled sexily, “Hello there, love.”

“What do you think you’re doing?”

“Well, let’s just say that after your little act of spontaneity, my parents—and by parents I mean Mom—were really glad to have met my ‘girlfriend’, although they were pretty bummed that you left early. So now they want to have dinner with you and your parents. Candice suggested your place so that your mom could be in her comfort zone, being pregnant and all. If it’s all right, that is. We’ll bring food, anyway. Does seven-thirty sound good?”

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“Should’ve thought about that before you turned into Ms. Daring and charged into my humble home, huh?” he said. I could almost imagine him smiling his Cheshire Cat smile.

I felt like pulling out the roots of my hair. Plan J was turning into a mess. Sure, I’d wanted Colin’s parents to think that I was his girlfriend, but I didn’t think they’d take it this far, to the point that they wanted to meet up and have dinner with my parents.

I only realized that I was just standing there, staring into space and biting my lip nervously, when Colin asked, “Well? I can’t wait all day, you know.”

I groaned angrily and said, “Fine! I’ll ask.”

I covered the speaker with my hand and turned to face my mom. When I saw her grinning expectantly at me, I gulped. Oh dear.

“Um, Mom,” I started, “Colin’s parents said that they want to have dinner with you and Dad…and Candice—um, Dr. Stillman—pointed out that it’d be better if they ate here so that you could be in your comfort zone. Colin’s asking if it’s okay and—”

“If it’s okay? Of course it is!” my mom said with a tone that said that I should’ve known that already in the first place. “Tell him I’m excited to meet his family. Oh, Seven, I’m so happy for the two of you.”

“Yeah, I am so not telling him that,” I deadpanned, giving her a flat stare.

“I’ll have to get everything ready,” she said to herself and then rushed off, back to the kitchen, our bonding time already pushed aside to the back of her mind—if it was still there at all.

As I watched her go, I raised the phone back to my ear and was just about to relay the message, but Colin beat me to the chase. “You don’t need to tell me. I heard everything.”

“You can hear us?”

“Yeah, well, you need to learn how to properly cover a phone. Oh, and tell your mom that I’m just as happy as she is for the two of us,” he said, chuckling.

I gritted my teeth. Once again, Colin had not only thwarted my plan, but he’d turned it back around against me.

“I hate you,” I grumbled, although part of me—no, my entire being—knew that I didn’t mean it.

“My, don’t be so aggressive, Seven,” he said, “I’ll see you later, anyway.”

I paused for a moment in confusion and then groaned. “Please don’t tell me you’re saying these things while your mom’s listening.”

In answer, Colin merely chuckled. “I love you too, babe.”

I scowled at the phone and slammed it back down, promptly hanging up.

***

Later that night, after I’d showered, perfumed, and dressed in my Sunday best (at my mother’s insistence), I stood in front of my mirror, feeling weird.

I was wearing a sleeveless white dress that ended a little above the knee. It had intricate patterns sewn in lace and was slightly tight around the waist but the skirt flowed elegantly down from there. I paired it with black strappy sandals to make it look more casual and didn’t bother with any accessories.

Overall my outfit was comfortable and, modesty aside, I looked nice. But that wasn’t what was making me feel weird.

It was the fact that in a few minutes the front door would open and my mom would welcome Colin and his family in, as if I was really his girlfriend and he was really my boyfriend.

This is wrong, I thought and had been thinking for practically the entire day. I should just tell them the truth. The question is: will they believe me? They’ll just think I’m being bashful. I set this plan up too well and now it’s come back to bite me on the tail.

“Seven?”

I looked up from my reflection and only then noticed my dad, who’d been standing by the doorframe of my room for who knew how long already. He was wearing a lavender button-down shirt and black slacks, which were most likely forced upon him by mom as well.

“Dad,” I said.

“You look so beautiful, kiddo,” he said, smiling at me and walking over. “I’m sure Colin…would be stunned.” In the mirror, I saw his smile waver slightly.

“You say it like it’s a bad thing,” I noted.

“No, it’s just…” My dad hesitated. “How long have the two of you been together?”

Uh-oh. “Um…I think two weeks or so?” I said, my answer sounding more like a question than an answer.

“Was this after he visited you when you got your ankle sprained?”

“Yeah…” I said slowly.

“But it’s before we found out your mother’s pregnant, right?”

“Yeah, but does it matter?” I asked, hoping to turn this conversation around.

He shrugged. “I guess I thought that if he did have feelings for you, he would be the type to hide them—at least for a little while longer.”

I pondered over it. Dad thought Colin might have feelings for me? “Well, maybe you just got wrong.”

“Maybe,” he said, but he sounded uncertain.

Sooner than I wanted, someone pressed on the doorbell twice and then Mom’s heels were clicking against the wood downstairs. “They’re here!” she told us.

Dad sighed and placed a hand on my shoulder, guiding me out of the room. “Come on, kiddo, let’s go before your mom sends an entire army to bring us down.”

I laughed, albeit a little nervously, and made my way down the stairs. I took my time, and when my dad and I reached the last step, the Stillmans had already been enthusiastically ushered inside.

From where I was standing, I could see Candice and Cass, almost identical as they craned their necks to look around my living room, a tray of food in their hands. Mrs. Stillman was beaming, already making the introductions, while Mr. Stillman stood beside her with his own tray, smiling politely.

And then my eyes flitted over to the still-open door and focused solely on the figure ducking inside.

I knew that the last time I saw Colin was only yesterday, not to mention that I’d dreamed about him and talked to him just hours ago, but seeing him walk through that door in a white button-down with a loose black tie, it felt just like the first time I ever saw him—my heartbeat skipping, cheeks warming and butterflies unleashed.

He looked up and met my eyes, and in a flash I remembered the kiss, my face flaming.

“Seven!” my mom called, waving me over. “What are you doing, just standing there? Come over here. You too, honey.” As she turned back to Colin’s mom, my dad and I shuffled towards the group.

“Hello,” I said, waving briefly to his parents.

“Seven! It’s nice to see you again!” his mom said, surprising me by engulfing me with a hug. I wondered for a moment if she was genuinely happy to see me again even after she saw me kissing her son or if she was just being sarcastic.

Nevertheless, I leaned away with a smile and then exchanged a short acknowledging nod with his dad.

My dad extended his hand towards Mr. Stillman. “Pleasure to meet you,” he said. “I’m Sean, Seven’s father.”

Mr. Stillman gave my dad a firm handshake. “Oh, the pleasure is all mine. I’m Morgan. Congratulations, by the way, on your baby.”

“Thank you. My wife and I are hoping it’s a boy. I bet you must be very proud of your boy,” my dad said, smiling. “You raised him well.”

“I sincerely hope so,” Mr. Stillman grunted. If it weren’t for the smile on his face, I would’ve thought he was being serious.

What does he mean by that? I wondered, and from the confusion I could see in my dad’s eyes, I knew he was thinking the same. But he just pushed it away and laughed, assuring Colin’s dad that it was the truth.

While their conversation quickly switched to the topic of the latest political issue, I took a small step back and found Colin standing right behind me. He peered down at me and I got this really odd feeling in my stomach when I noticed how much taller he was than me.

“Hey there,” he said, smirking. Gosh, he had such a nice smile.

“Hi,” I said demurely, suddenly overcame by shyness. Seriously. After all the close encounters and sticky situations I had gone through with him, you’d think I would be over the jitters already.

“Well, Colin?” his mom asked, crossing her arms and giving him an expectant look. “Is that the only greeting your girlfriend’s going to get?”

Colin flushed, making a face at his mom, but she was relentless. After a moment, he leaned towards me and left a soft peck on my cheek.

And just like that, my knees turned into jelly and any irritation I might have harbored for him quickly disappeared.

Before Mrs. Stillman could add anything else, he produced a bouquet of white roses out of nowhere and offered them to my mom. She took them with a hand pressed to her heart and a teary smile. “Oh, Colin, you didn’t have to. Thank you so much.”

His mom watched with pride shining in her eyes.

“I already got the thorns removed,” he added, smiling like a little boy. That made my mom laugh.

She raised the flowers to her face and sniffed deeply. “Mm…these smell amazing. And they’re so beautiful. Excuse me for a moment,” she told us, “I’ll just go look for a vase for these.” As she turned to leave, Candice and Cass walked over to Colin and me.

“Hello, Seven,” Candice greeted me. “I heard you were at our house yesterday? It’s too bad I had to work then.”

“It’s alright,” I assured her. “I’m glad you could come tonight.”

“Yeah, but wow,” she said, raising her eyebrows at Colin and me. “You guys…are together. I mean, I’d thought of the possibility but…wow.”

You’re not alone in thinking that, I thought, remembering my dad’s reaction a while ago.

“Hey, Seven! What about me?” Cass joked. “Are you glad to see me?”

I laughed. “Yes, you too, Cass,” I said.

“Well,” she said, “I know someone else who’s glad to be here.” She glanced implicatively at Colin and wagged her eyebrows. Her older brother frowned.

“What?” she asked defensively. With a playful grin, she adapted her mother’s voice—quite well, actually. “Is that the only greeting your girlfriend’s going to get? Hmm? Why don’t you give her a kiss on the lips?”

“Oh, shut up,” he said, rolling his eyes. He suddenly wrapped his arm around me, and heat rushed up to my neck as he pulled me close to him, my shoulder poking his ribs. “I can kiss her whenever I want and you, of all people, don’t have a say on that.”

“Alright, alright,” Candice said, stepping in between the two siblings, “both of you stop it. You’re embarrassing Seven.” She turned to me and raised the tray in her hands. “So, where are we supposed to put this?”

“Oh, right over here,” I said, using this opportunity as an excuse to leave the comfort of his arm and actually remember how to breathe. I guided them to the long black foldable table topped with a pretty crocheted tablecloth that took the place of our original table. It was only for tonight, seeing as it could only accommodate six people and we were eight people all-in-all.

They carefully laid out the trays among the other dishes already placed there. Even after I’d repeatedly told her that the Stillmans were going to bring the food, Mom still insisted on preparing her own. Now we looked like we were going to have a feast for an entire army.

Mom hurriedly came out of the kitchen carrying a dark blue glass vase where the roses Colin gave her were already in water.

“Please, everyone, take a seat,” she told us as she walked over to the coffee table in our living room and positioned the vase right at the center. She fiddled with the petals for a little bit until she was satisfied, only then did she approach the dining table.

My dad was already sitting at one end of the table, Colin’s dad at the other. I sat on my dad’s left, right across from my mom. Candice took the seat between her and Mrs. Stillman, while Cass took the place on her father’s right. And of course, Colin was sitting beside me.

“Wow,” my dad said in awe as he looked over the food. “You’ve outdone yourself again, hon.”

“Oh, you’re just saying that because we have guests,” my mom said, rolling her eyes.

Mrs. Stillman laughed. “I’m sure he means it, Julie. Here,” she said, reaching over to grab the pitcher of juice. “Let me fill your glasses.”

My mom handed her our glasses and then took the plate of smoked chicken. “Here you go, Candice,” she said. “It’s alright for me to call you that, right? ‘Doctor’ seems too formal for this occasion.”

Candice smiled and accepted the plate from her. “Of course. Thank you.”

“Colin, you should try some too,” my mom insisted, passing the plate to him. He took it from her hands with a small smile. “You know,” she added, “Seven helped cook that.”

“Oh?” his mom cooed, turning to me. “So you cook too, Seven?”

I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion. “No, I didn’t,” I said to my mom. “You even told me to stay away from the kitchen before I set something on fire.”

Mom shot me a look that told me to shut up, before flashing an innocent smile at Mrs. Stillman.

I can’t believe it. My mother’s selling me off, I thought, shaking my head.

Beside me, Colin chuckled as he stabbed a piece of chicken with his fork and dropped it on his plate. “Now that’s more believable,” he said.

I fired a glare his way but he just smiled at me and handed me the smoked chicken. I took a piece of my own and gave the plate to my dad. We all started on our meals and for a couple of minutes, we maintained a comfortable silence, each of us busy with our own food. The clinking of our knives against our plates and the occasional noisy munching were the only sounds to be heard.

“So, Seven,” Mrs. Stillman began after swallowing down her third batch of beans, “your mother’s been telling me that your grades in math are exceptional.”

“I guess they’re fine,” I said, shrugging.

“Any plans for college yet?”

I hesitated, thinking carefully about my answer. “Yeah, I’m thinking of being a lawyer.”

At that, Colin turned to look over at me questioningly but I didn’t mind him.

“Hmm…like father, like daughter,” Mr. Stillman noted, speaking for the first time during the whole exchange. He’d been sitting quietly in his place, sometimes mumbling a small “thank you” for a passed dish. His posture was erect and stiff, so stiff that it was almost weird to see him moving, leaning forward on his elbows and weaving his fingers together with a smile.

His green gaze drifted towards me and I tensed up, feeling like a spotlight was focused solely on me. “Tell me, Seven,” he said, “how are things at school?”

“Um…they’re alright, I suppose. The usual hectic projects, last-minute assignments…” I answered vaguely. I only noticed then the sudden eerie silence that the dining table and its occupants had taken. There was just something about the way Mr. Stillman talked; it demanded everybody’s attention.

It felt like the calm before the storm.

“That’s good, that’s good…” he said, nodding slowly. Just when I thought he was done with me, he cut a glance towards me. “But I’ve been hearing rumors.”

My blood froze over, wondering what could possibly be running in the rumor mill about me. “Rumors…sir?”

He chuckled, waving a dismissive hand. “Nothing to worry about,” he assured me. “It’s not about you. It’s about Colin here.”

From the corner of my eye, I saw Colin’s hand close into a tight fist.

My eyes darted towards him and they widened in surprise when I took in the cold, hard stare he’d fixed upon his father.

His bright green eyes were always like warm hugs at the end of a long day. But this time, there was a deadly glint to them that reminded me of those daggers you see assassins carrying in movies—daggers meant for the kill. I’d never seen Colin this angry before.

I was absolutely certain that this wasn’t the first time he’d been teased for the fact that a lot of girls pined over him and had been heartbroken when he didn’t reciprocate. Roman had even told me to be careful in a half-joking way, but Colin didn’t take it to heart. And sure there were times when he got irritated, maybe even pissed, when I pretended to be his girlfriend and got his mom started, and when I took his stuff away as a form of revenge, but not like this. This was pure hatred.

I glanced around the table to see the others’ reaction. Mrs. Stillman had her head bowed slightly and her eyes squeezed shut. Cass was nervously biting her lip and Candice was frowning.

Something was definitely wrong.

I turned back to Mr. Stillman. He was smiling. Was that a hint of mischief in his eyes? “About…Colin?” I asked hesitantly.

“Oh, yes,” he said, taking his knife and fork and cutting off a slice of the fish Mom had made, ignoring the fact that the tension around the table was so thick that I could almost see it right before my eyes. “I’ve heard he’s quite the player. Well, it’s not that hard to believe. I mean, just look back at his ex-girlfriends. I don’t think he even took any of them seriously.”

“Morgan,” Mrs. Stillman squeaked, her voice so small I barely heard her.

“What?” he asked defensively. “It’s true.” He looked back at me. “I’m just telling you this, Seven, so you can be sure on who you’re giving your heart to. He just breezes past, leaving broken hearts in his wake. Isn’t that right, son?”

Colin didn’t respond immediately. He just glared at his father, the seconds turning into minutes and the silence continuing on.

That is, until finally Colin’s face relaxed and he smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Why, of course you’re right. I mean, it does take a player to know one. I bet you know a lot about breaking hearts. Like father, like son, I suppose,” he said, shrugging. “But since we’re already sharing, do you mind if I share your own experience in that field? Or are you too much of a hypocrite that you won’t admit any of it to be true?”

“Colin,” Candice said, her eyes flicking towards his direction, an implied warning.

Beside him, I saw Cass take his hand and squeeze. Mrs. Stillman, however, remained quiet and as still as a statue.

Colin ignored his sisters as he pushed back his chair and got up to his feet. “Excuse me,” he said, turning away from the table and heading towards the stairs. He jogged up the steps and disappeared around the corner.

After a little while, my mom laughed nervously, trying to ease the tension. “I’m sure he’ll be back. He probably just went to the bathroom or something.”

Nobody paid her any attention.

Candice sighed and turned to her father. “Dad,” she said, “you shouldn’t have done that. You just made him angrier.”

Her father resumed his eating as if nothing had just happened in the past minute. “That boy should learn to respect his father. No matter what has happened, he’s still—”

“That’s stupid,” I blurted out.

Everyone looked over at me with surprise. Mr. Stillman was stunned. “What did you say?” he asked.

I looked up, gathering my courage and meeting his eyes. I took a deep breath. “I said that’s stupid. Colin’s not like that. Although he pulls a lot of pranks on people, he’s really sweet and kind. It’s not his fault if girls fawn over him because of that. And he has every right to turn them down.

“Besides, the only time I saw him speak so frankly to the point of insulting was when the person he’s talking to deserved it. I have no idea what you could’ve done, sir, to deserve his anger, but it must’ve been horrible if you could make the guy who smiles the brightest that mad.”

I stood up, ready to do my own walkout, but stopped. “Oh, and to be completely honest,” I added, “I wouldn’t have given my respect to someone who says slanderous things about his son and who makes him look like a terrible person either.”

I turned away and walked determinedly towards the kitchen. I didn’t bother looking for Colin. He probably wouldn’t be in the best of moods and I didn’t want to know if he’d be patient enough to tolerate my presence or not.

“I’m going to get dessert,” I announced, even though we’d only touched half of the food. My mom immediately stood up, excusing herself to help me, but Candice put a hand on her arm and said, “It’s okay, Mrs. Warrilow. I’ll help her.”

For once, my mom didn’t argue.

Even with my back turned, I knew Candice was following me into the kitchen by the sound of her heels on the floor. I also knew that what I just said was rude, especially since it was concerning another family fight that I had no part whatsoever in, but I didn’t care—at least not at that moment.

What I didn’t know was that Colin Stillman didn’t actually go up the stairs to go to the bathroom or something, like we thought he did. He was just sitting on one of the steps, hiding and listening to every word we’d said, which included every word I’d just said.

And in the darkness where no one could see him, he smiled.