PIPER MANNED THE STEAMER, getting every tiny wrinkle out of the newly finished jumpsuit and ready for Rashae’s final inspection. Ever since she’d arrived to find three women on her doorstep, they’d been go-go-go, tense silence and furtive glances when the others thought she wasn’t looking. Piper hadn’t even had a moment to do her paperwork what with all the fabric and sequins all over the place.

She kept telling herself this was only for a few more days. The other girls were going on a pre-con cruise. Piper had declined the invitation because while she enjoyed hanging out with the couples, being the seventh wheel wasn’t fun. Now, she’d need that time between the group setting sail and coming back just to get caught up to where she needed to be for the con. Part of her wanted to go. She missed how they used to be, but it just wasn’t the same anymore.

“Okay, how we looking?” Rashae clapped her hands together and strode over with Miranda in her wake to where Piper was hard at work. Rashae’s gaze roved over the four, matching outfits she’d created in the matter of days.

“Those are beautiful,” Miranda said around the straight pins perched at the corner of her mouth.

“Do you think we can finish the accessories tonight?” Tamara followed the others and came to a stop next to Piper.

“Maybe? I’d have said yes if we’d been able to start on time.” Rashae’s verbal barbs hit deep. Piper knew that statement was aimed at her. She took a deep breath and clung to her smile. It would all be okay.

“Where were you this morning?” Tamara pivoted and stared at Piper.

“I told you I’m sorry. I never saw the text about today. I thought you guys were getting back this morning.” Piper stood and turned the steamer off.

“But where were you?” Tamara asked.

“Out.” Piper shrugged.

“Out where? With who? Doing what?” Rashae threw her hands up in the air.

Piper glanced at Tamara.

Josh hadn’t told on her? What about the other guys?

Someone was going to say something. If not today, tomorrow or at the con. Piper knew these things got around, especially in their close-knit circle. It would be better if she got out ahead of this.

“We came back early and sent the guys off to the beach just so we’d have another day together, and you’re nowhere.” Tamara ticked the points off on her fingers. “You don’t answer texts. You don’t answer calls. You’re not here. You won’t tell us anything.”

“I never asked you to do any of that for me.” Piper set the steamer on the kitchen table before she threw it. Why was all of this on her? Why was it her fault? “I never asked you to come back early from your trip. I didn’t ask you to make special time for me. I’m sorry I wasn’t here when you guys showed up, but...give me a break. Please?”

“Okay, can we all take a deep breath?” Miranda took a step until she was between Piper and the other two. “I think what we’re all trying to say that’s getting lost in the frustration is, we miss having you with us. Am I right?”

Both Tamara and Rashae muttered agreement.

Piper swallowed and glanced away, wrestling with the twisted knot of emotions in her chest.

“What about me? What about my feelings?” Piper stared at Miranda. “You guys have all moved on. You’ve changed. It’s not a bad thing, it’s just a fact. And me? I’m back here by myself. Alone until you guys want to use my apartment as a construction zone. I’m supposed to wait around until you guys have time for me? That’s really...”

“That’s shitty.” Tamara nodded.

“Yeah.” Rashae winced. “When you put it like that, it does suck. But we’re trying to do something together now. You’re just not checked in.”

“How can I be? The other day we all agreed to put our phones down and just talk. Like we used to. At first that was nice, but you guys...your lives are moving on and I’m just not part of it anymore.” Piper swiped her hands across her cheeks. “And, not that I don’t enjoy cosplay, but the only time you guys have spent with me this trip is when you want to work on the costumes. That’s it. Tamara, I don’t see you anymore and you live half an hour from me.”

“Come here, honey. You’re right.” Miranda folded her arms around Piper.

Her friends were happy, and she was happy for them. She wanted to still be friends with the girls, tell them everything, share their joys, frustrations and hard times together. But they all had a partner to go to first.

“It’s my fault,” Rashae said, her shoulders slumping. “I thought I’d have this all done by now, but I really underestimated what the shipping phase of our Kickstarter would be like.”

“I get that. I’m happy for you.” Piper reached out and squeezed Rashae’s hand.

“I’m sorry. Can you forgive me?” She squeezed Piper’s hand back.

“Of course.” Piper couldn’t imagine her life without these women. They had their spats, things that got on each other’s nerves, but when it boiled down to the hard times they stuck together.

“Group hug,” Rashae called out.

The other two women circled Piper and Miranda with their arms.

Piper felt ridiculous. After a prolonged moment the others let go, and they stood back, some wiping eyes, others holding onto that stoic serenity.

“I’m just putting it out there, what if you and Ellie go on the cruise with us?” Miranda asked.

Piper cringed a bit at the idea. Ellie would be a blast to hang out with, but they’d no doubt be on their own unless they wanted a front row seat to Couplesville and all the painfully adorable shit the guys got into. She’d probably go blubbery wanting that with Gideon and lose it on Ellie.

“I’m not sure. I’ve got a lot of work piling up.” She didn’t even have to make that one up.

“Think about it, okay? You’ve got—what? Twenty-four hours?” Miranda asked.

Piper couldn’t imagine dropping everything like that.

Wasn’t this the kind of thing she and Gideon had lamented they couldn’t do anymore?

“I’ve got something I’d like to talk about,” Tamara said. Her smile was gone and her expression was blank. It wasn’t a happy look.

“What’s up?” Piper frowned. Of all the girls, she was the closest with Tamara, which made the distance harder.

“Can we sit down first?” Tamara gestured at the sofa and cushions on the floor.

“Yeah. Totally.” Piper and Miranda led the way to the living room.

They moved a few projects, making room for them to sit facing each other. Tamara’s posture remained rigid, her complexion pale, kind of ashen. Piper scooted her cushion over until she was almost leaning on Tamara’s knee.

“Okay, I’m going to say this all at once, so don’t stop me or I’ll lose it. I don’t want you to feel sorry for me, either.” Tamara stared around the group, meeting each of their gaze. That done, she sucked in a deep breath. “You guys have all commented over the last couple weeks that I’ve been...absent. We found out about six weeks ago I was pregnant. Barely, I might add. I had a miscarriage two weeks ago. We’ve been doing a lot of talking, figuring out what we want, that sort of thing. I still don’t know how to talk about what happened. It’s crazy that it happened to us, but...maybe kind of good, too.”

Piper clutched Tamara’s hand, too stunned to say anything.

For a moment, no one spoke.

“Oh, honey, that’s a lot to go through.”  Miranda reached over and squeezed Tamara’s knee.

“Do you want a pillow to hug or punch?” Rashae asked.

Tamara chocked out a laugh and wiped the back of her hand over her face. Her lips spread into a smile, releasing the tension that had steadily built up in the room.

“I’m good, thanks.” Tamara patted Rashae’s hand.

“You guys are okay though?” Piper and Tamara’s boyfriend had a rocky history, but she couldn’t deny that there was no one else better suited for her best friend.

“We’re great. Stephen has been amazing. When we found out I convinced myself he would hate the idea of a kid.”

“Has this changed your mind about kids?” Miranda perked up.

“Not really.” Tamara shrugged. “It was hard for my mother to get pregnant, and we’re thinking it’s genetic. What this has changed for us is that...we’re thinking about getting married.”

“What?” Rashae gaped at Tamara.

Piper could feel air tickling the back of her mouth. She was no less shocked than the rest to hear that statement come out of Tamara’s mouth.

“It would be low key.” Tamara glared around at them. “We realized when I was in the hospital—”

“You were in the hospital?” Piper blinked.

“Yes. I know I should have told you guys. I was overwhelmed.” Tamara winced. “We realized how few rights Stephen has if we aren’t married. If we want to be together, having legal rights makes sense, you know?”

“Completely,” Rashae said.

“How are you doing now?” Miranda asked.

“Good. Better. Weirdly emotional, which Stephen has taken in stride.” Tamara shrugged.

“Unlike Tamara, I have no good reason for being absent from chat.” Rashae mimicked Tamara’s shrug.

“No reason?” Tamara laughed. “A thousand games to ship is no reason? Bull shit.”

They all laughed.

“I’ve missed you guys though. And I’m sad I—we—weren’t there for you.” Rashae reached over and touched Tamara’s shoulder, then glanced at Piper. “Or you. We’ve all let change and life pull us away, and that’s not cool. You guys are right, it’s not on any one of us. We’re all contributing to the problem.”

“Not that I want to piggyback off Tamara’s moment, but since we’re sharing—”

“We know, Drudge VIII is coming out. Promo is everywhere.” Rashae rolled her eyes.

“I’m not talking about that.” Miranda laughed and smacked Rashae’s knee. “Raul and I are talking about when we want to get engaged.”

“When? Not if?” Piper smirked. Those two had practically been married since the moment they met.

“Yes, when?” Miranda pushed Piper’s shoulder. “We’re both very aware that the moment we breathe a word of it to either of our families, things will get out of control.”

“Mine, too.” Rashae’s eyes went wide. “I told Declan to not even think about it until he’s ready to do it. Like, days or a week. I’m so not doing what my sister did. Lord.”

“The wedding was beautiful, but that’s exactly what I want to avoid,” Miranda said.

Piper leaned her head on Tamara’s knee. Their lives were so different from what they were a year or two years ago. Better in many ways, even if that meant they’d grown apart as their circle grew to accommodate the guys.

“Don’t think any of this made us forget you have yet to answer where you’ve been, and who you’ve been doing it with, Piper Erin.” Rashae pinned her with a stare.

It was a matter of time until they got around to Piper. She leaned back and for the first time in a long time, she felt like talking to these women.

“I was hanging out with Gideon.” It actually felt good to put those words out there.

“Flowers and hanging out?” Tamara mock gasped.

“Shut up.” Piper rolled her eyes.

“What’s going on with Gideon?” Miranda had the most amusing, befuddled expression on her face.

“We’re sort of together. Or something weird and not just friends. We haven’t put a label on it, but it’s nice. Being with him has helped me work out some of my anxiety.” Piper tried to swallow around the knot in her throat. Her hands grew damp and the hair on the back of her neck rose, but that was it.

“You and Gideon?” Tamara’s eyes went wide and her mouth hung open.

“When did this happen?” Miranda asked, the least fazed judging by the other two women’s faces.

“Um...a few days ago?” Piper shrugged. “Like I said, it’s weird.”

“Wait—wait—wait.” Rashae held up her hands. “What does, we’re sort of together, or something, actually mean?”

“We went on a date, and we’ve been...” Piper’s mouth was dry and she couldn’t find words to finish the sentence.

“Are you trying to say you had sex with Gideon? Your dude friend?” Rashae’s eyes widened.

“Yeah.” Maybe Piper should have reconsidered being this forthright with them.

“Wow. That’s a change.” Miranda’s voice went up an octave.

“I think we’re missing part of the picture. Can you rewind and explain how this happened?” Tamara asked.

“It started with my new therapist suggesting I challenge myself. The two things I struggle with are dating and going out by myself. I decided to ask Gideon out. I asked, he said yes, and...” Piper shrugged.

The other girls were staring. This wasn’t the reaction she’d expected.

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Tamara asked.

“Yes,” Piper said. She didn’t even have to think about that, which probably said a lot about where her heart was.

“Is this a relationship thing? Because it seems like Gideon pops up and leaves just as fast.” Tamara held up her hands. “I don’t want to tell you not to do it, I’m just...”

“We’re worried,” Miranda said.

Piper swallowed and nodded. Gideon was not the smartest of choices when it came to testing out her training wheels, but he was what her heart had chosen.

“I talked this out with Ellie and Josh before the date with Gideon. He’s the one person—guy—I know I can trust without any doubts. I also know that I could wake up tomorrow and he’ll be checked out, back to work, and that’s it, but one thing I do know now is that I could date the right person.”

“Is he treating you right?” Rashae asked.

“Of course.” Piper smiled. The girls were going to lose their shit when she told them about the yacht. “I’m not afraid of intimacy. Maybe I never really was. I’m still very uncomfortable with public scrutiny, but I’m getting better.”

“You have.” Rashae nodded. “I remember the first time we put you in that Sailor Moon outfit, you almost had a panic attack when someone asked to take your picture.”

“Oh—God.” Piper recalled that moment, even had photo evidence of it. That instance, and so many more like it, were markers of her growth. She’d put her professional career together against the odds. The girls had helped her overcome much of her social anxieties and backed her up whenever history reared its ugly head. What else was there? What was she really afraid of?

“Maybe Gideon wasn’t the smartest choice to ask out. We have a lot of history.” Piper stared at the carpet.

“I’m really torn about him,” Tamara said.

“Why’s that?” Rashae asked.

“He introduced Piper and I, which was awesome, but I’ve watched him pop in and out of Piper’s life over the years and I just...I get frustrated.” Tamara stared at Piper. “He used to be your best friend, then he vanished. I hate watching him come and go, and what it does to you.”

Piper nodded. Tamara wasn’t saying anything Piper hadn’t thought herself. Gideon could say all he wanted that they could do this thing, they could be together, but history proved that he would forget those promises when the time came to work.

“You know, one of the things I liked about those years Gideon and I were really tight? We’d just pick up and go do crazy shit. Weekend trips to the dunes, down the coast, Vegas, whatever. Maybe I should go on the cruise.”

Piper was too close to this thing with her and Gideon. She loved him, and probably always would, but that didn’t mean they were good for each other or that she would take table scraps when she deserved it all.

Maybe it was time to put some distance between them, for her sake.