I took Allie out to dinner to celebrate my good news, feeling heavy hearted about how to tell my angel she couldn’t go with me to training camp. I understood now, the kick-ass attitude she’d displayed when I first met her was a front she used to keep from getting hurt. I didn’t blame her, but I also knew she was beating herself up over all the shit that’d happened to me because of Jade. I was afraid when I told her we couldn’t be together for a while, she’d take it the wrong way, think I was using this to get rid of her.

Finally, after our waiter cleared the main course plates from our table at the Chop House, she broached the subject I’d been avoiding.

“You don't have to keep pretending I'm going with you.” Her eyes dropped to the paper cocktail napkin she’d been shredding for the last few minutes.

“Baby…” I took her hand and pulled it away from the mangled napkin. “You know I wanted you to come with me. I didn't understand this whole process. Hell, I didn’t even know there’d be two training camps. We’ll just have a long distance relationship for a while, that’s all.”

I felt like dirt. I really wanted to show Allie how committed I was to our relationship, but now it seemed my career was getting in the way.

“Yeah, but where do I go? You’ll be leaving next week and AJ will want to move back into his own apartment, the one I kicked him out of.”

“Stop it. You didn’t kick him out. He volunteered to leave. He knew it was only temporary. Anyway…” I rubbed my thumb in circles on the back of her hand.

She looked as sad as I felt. Allie was really very sweet underneath her hard-core attitude.

“You still have your pizza job here and well, here’s my idea. You can stay in my apartment with AJ at least until the end of summer. In college towns, the apartment managers make students sign a year's lease even though they only need it for the nine months of the school year. So the apartment is still available for you to use while I’m in training camps and you can keep working. That way you don’t have to go back to Flagstaff and be anywhere near fuck face Jade.” I leaned in. “You know I don’t want him near you.”

“I don’t have enough money to pay half of the rent on your apartment.”

“What about money from your pizza job?”

“I’ve spent it all paying AJ back for the plane ticket from Flagstaff to here when we all came back.”

I nodded. “Don’t worry. I’ll continue paying for my half of the rent.”

I really didn’t have the money. I’d blown my entire student loan money on taking Allie out to dinners and fun stuff, but I didn’t want to worry her. I knew AJ and his daddy’s deep pockets would cover me until I received some of my football money. Then I’d pay him back. But knowing he’d be losing a roommate for the summer, AJ might have already found someone to sublease my room. Possibly a summer school student. I’d need to check.

She stared at our hands on the table. “What do you think?” I frowned. “You don’t look very happy about my idea.”

“Um, well, I sort of don’t have a job anymore. It’s the end of the school year and the demand for Pagliais’s famous pizza pies is less over the summer when most of the students go home. My boss said they don’t need as many workers. And you know how impossible it is to get a job in a college town just for the short months of the summer. Besides, I don't want to be a kept woman and you’d be stressed worrying about me when you need to focus on football.”

“But Allie, where would you go?”

“Back to Flagstaff ––”

“No,” I cut her off. “You’re not going back there, I already told you.”

“It seems like I have no choice. I could crash on my parent’s couch until I figure something out.”

“No, you’re not listening to me, baby. I won’t have you back there.”

“I already called my old gas station manager and talked to him about getting my job back. The renovation work is completed and they’re open for business again.”

I looked at her, watching her try to save face, be the strong one and not take charity from me. It hurt my heart that she didn’t want to take me up on my offer, that she didn’t see it as a gift of my love for her.

“Cam, long distance relationships are hard. And I want to feel like I pull my own weight, not that I’m dependent on you or AJ or anyone. I’ve been riding on your coat tails since we met. I don’t see any other way.”

I knew what Saul had told me about how training camps would eat up most all of my time. In a long distance relationship, Allie would probably hear from me very little. It sounded like we wouldn’t be together for the entire summer, until September when football season would start. It was dangerous territory, that’s for sure, but I’d feel a hell of a lot better about her being with AJ in Austin, than with Jade in Flagstaff.

I placed my other hand on top of hers, sandwiching it between mine. “Baby, you’re not a burden to me in any way shape or form. I love you and I want you safe.

“But..but…”

I patted her hand. “But nothing. Don’t worry. You can stay in my apartment and...guess what? I know of a job you can apply for.”

She lifted her eyes and I saw the hope in them. My heart gave a zing and I brightened. She was going to stay.

“AJ’s dad’s company, Gloria’s Secret, is accepting applications for a modeling shoot.”

“What? I’m not a model?” She furrowed her brow, puzzled. “You’re making this up just to get me to stay.”

“No, seriously. You’re exactly what they’re looking for. The company is doing a promotion of a new line of pajamas for college-age women with different college logos on the pajama tops and stuff, and they want real college girls for the ads. You know, like from the University of Texas, but from a whole bunch of colleges all over the US. Since you’re technically still a college student at Northern Arizona, you qualify.”

“Really? Me a model?” She had a look in her eyes not far from being star-struck with the idea of being in front of a camera.

“Yeah, really. A pajama model.” I laughed. I was glad to see her happy again. I loved her. I wanted to jump over the table and wrap my arms around her. Knowing she would be in Austin with AJ to keep her safe for me was a great relief.

“It was AJ’s idea. He said he’ll schmooze the promotion manager at Gloria’s Secret and make sure to put in a good word for you. So you see, you have to stay. You'll have money to pay for rent and you don’t have to worry about anything. I want you here and safe until you can join me in the fall.”

AJ had promised me that Allie would get picked for sure, but I didn’t want to tell her that part, not right now.

“I, I don’t know what to say. I’ve never thought of myself as a model, let alone a Gloria’s Secret model.”

“Well, you won't be walking a runway in lace panties and big white feather wings. What’re they called? Those models? Angels?”

“No. Those are Gloria’s Secret Heavenly Beings.”

“Whatever, you’ll be the most beautiful one of them all. Who’d ever think models in angel wings would be a hit?”

She laughed. “AJ’s dad, I guess. But I wouldn’t be one of those, right?”

“Right. This is just a onetime photo shoot for the new pajama stuff and using college-student girls. I think it’s a great promotion idea for the company.”

“Like you know so much about marketing. Let’s just see if I get picked for the job.”

“Hey, I know women. I took a Women’s Studies class. Plus...I like to study you, sweetheart.”

“Okay, so you know three things, football, women, and me.”

I gazed into her ocean blue eyes and she said the words I wanted to hear, “I love you. And thank you. But I don’t have the job yet. So we’ll see.”