Sinking into the couch, I rested my head back to close my eyes, and a long, tired groan escaped my chest. I barely had the energy to swipe away the sweat from my forehead. Behind my eyelids my mind was slow, and I took deep, calming breaths as the heat in my veins began to slowly cool.

“Does it hurt?” Next to me Hannah radiated concern, and I flopped my head forward to stare at my knuckles. The skin was broken, blood welling up from the crevices, and I flexed my fingers absently before shaking my head.

“Not anymore.” Her fingertips were soft, the stalks long and slender, and I pursed my lips together as she became stained with blood. The sight twisted my expression, and her lips thinned as the blood roaring in my ears gave way to the sounds of the gym around us.

“That’s so sad. I’m sorry, James- I really am.” Her words were gentle, dismayed, and I let out a hot breath as she prodded my injuries. “I met Nick. He came to my college yesterday.”

“Was he a cynical asshole to everyone as he silently peered over your shoulder at whatever you were doing?” Glancing at her, I watched Hannah nod with a small giggle, and I let my head fall back to close my eyes again. “He’s got high expectations of people he doesn’t even know. If he hires you, he’ll get better. He used to do that shit with me in high school. I punched him in the face, and he never did it again.”

“What were you like in high school?” She surely was inquisitive, this Hannah. Taking a second to think on her question, I had to force myself to remember that far back.

“I was a punk. I knew enough to know I didn’t want to learn more, and that was that. Nick hated it- we’ve always been opposites, so we were always butting heads. Whenever the school called our father, I’d get the shit beaten out of me, and Nick got bitched out about letting it happen. One time, right before I graduated, I made a fully functional gun out of random shit, and that’s when my dad finally understood I wasn’t meant for that shit. Two weeks later he got me into boot camp- the best thing that ever happened to me.” Just thinking about that incident pulled a harsh bark of laughter from me, and I reached to cover my face with my hand. “I wasn’t made to lead, I was made to follow.”

“I get told that a lot, too… I never understood why people meant it as an insult…” In my mind’s eye I could see Hannah’s pretty face twisting from the strained confusion in her voice. A rough cloth dabbed my swollen, leaking knuckles, but the sting that should’ve shot up my arm was absent. “We live in a world where being a follower goes against societal thinking. Everyone has to be active, to get what they want without considering others’ opinions, so they can pave a way for themselves by themselves. But… I think that those kinds of people aren’t leaders. They’re… they’re rogues.”

Peeking out from under my palm, I watched through narrowed eyes as Hannah smiled small. She seemed to do that a lot, and I wondered if she was physically capable of frowning. Reaching to stroke a fallen lock of straw colored waves, I inhaled sharply through my nose.

“Rogues can’t be leaders, but that doesn’t stop them from trying.” Every word out of Hannah’s mouth made me think, hard, and I exhaled roughly before changing the subject. “You don’t have to do that. I didn’t ask you to come here so you can patch me up and fry my brain.”

Hannah’s tender touch paused, and I drew my brows together as she laughed, tossing her head side to side. My heart thudded hard at the sound, delicate and musical, and around her eyes crinkled deeply.

She’s so pure and happy… how could she not be taken? The question had no answer, and my throat tightened before she spoke up.

“I’m the one that agreed to come to the gym with you, James. I could’ve said ‘no’. Honestly… I kind of wanted to. I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone else’s blood before…” Her voice didn’t waver, and I lolled my head to the side as she continued with her ministrations. It was hard for me to tell if she was having the time of her life or if she was uncomfortable; that smile of hers never left her face. I’d always thought of perpetually happy people as nuisances, deliberately blinding themselves to the horrors of the world that I knew all too well.

“Have you seen your own blood before?” Hannah’s smile dimmed, and I silently wondered if her expression only had one setting. Watching her shrug, I twisted my hand to take hold of her wrist firmly. “What about when you were a kid?”

The deep probe sent a bolt of alarm through my chest; it wasn’t like me to ask such personal questions. Against the pads of my knuckles Hannah’s pulse was steady, and she shrugged again.

“My dad always made me close my eyes when I got hurt. It started to become a habit, and I’m always careful not to hurt myself. It’s hard to explain… He always said I was a fragile ray of sun…” As close to a somber laugh as I’d heard so far escaped Hannah, and I arched an eyebrow when her gaze flickered to mine. “He’s like you- a career Marine. He’s not a poetic man at all. He left the Marines when I was 8, got a job at a security firm ten minutes away, and never left home for more than a few hours.”

“So, you’re a Daddy’s girl?” A shit-eating grin stretched my lips at that, and Hannah turned a pale red. “What’s your father’s name? Maybe I knew him.”

“Eh-h… Master Sargant Gabriel Martins… I think?” My eyes narrowed, and I tore my gaze off Hannah to stare at the high, concrete ceiling. Martins came to mind with a viciousness, and blood gorged my muscles at the mere thought of him.

We hated each other even as we went on deployment after deployment together. The last time we saw each other, the day he was discharged, he spit on my boots.

“Oh- I know him, alright. He’s a tough son of a bitch… Hell of a Marine, though. I got a lot of scars from fighting with him. This one-“ Pulling Hannah’s hand up to my cheek, I didn’t even realize what I was doing until her fingertips brushed the jagged, raised mark. Blinking hard, I forgot what I was going to say as I marveled at how gentle she was before clearing my throat. “He cut me with a beer bottle after we had a few too many. That was… 12 years ago, now? You must’ve been six or seven at the time. It wasn’t too long after that that Martins said he was backing out.”

Releasing Hannah’s wrist, I stiffened when she didn’t automatically pull away from what I was forcing on her. Instead, she scooted closer to drag her fingertips along the length of my five-inch scar, and I held my breath as hers cooled the sweat on my shoulder.

“We were invaded…” The soft mumble caught me off guard, and Hannah gulped noticeably in my ear. “Someone broke into our house… my brother hurt the guy so bad he was in a coma for two months. He- he killed our dog, Scratches. Then, the guy that broke into our house pressed charges against Jake for attempted murder… and he won.”

“You’re shitting me…” My heart thundered in my chest, and I clenched my hands into tight fists to undo the work Hannah had done on my knuckles. Grinding my teeth together, I tensed at the rush of adrenaline that seared through my veins, and the red haze in my mind blocked the puzzle pieces from coming together. Squeezing my eyes shut, I rubbed my leg furiously before Hannah’s quiet voice caused the episode to cease.

“James… It’s fine. It was a l-“

“Bullshit!” Cutting Hannah off, I shook my head hard before pushing myself to my feet. My outburst echoed around the gym, and the blood roaring in my ears did nothing to dull the sound. Curious eyes settled on my form, and I snorted roughly as I stared down at her. “It’s not fine.”

Biting the words through clenched teeth, I took a sharp, hard breath before Hannah sprung up from her seat. Her smaller hands enclosed around my fists, eyes wide and begging as they bored into mine.

“That’s not what I meant. I- I got… through… it.” Stepping close, she dropped her voice and rose up on her tip toes. She was so short it didn’t do anything, and I stiffened as my heart jumped into my throat. “Can- can we not talk about this… here? Please?”

“Yeah…” Swiping my palm across my jaw, I took Hannah’s hand to head out of the gym. Sharp eyes watched us go, looking for any sign that this was less than consensual, and I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. I couldn’t even recognize most of these faces despite coming here every day for the past month. Heading out into the cool, breezy city, I released the thin wrist in my palm to shake myself out.

“…Sorry.” Muttering into the empty sidewalk, I flexed my hands and glanced down only to find small drops of blood welling up from my shredded knuckles. There was less than I would’ve expected, and I twisted to get the air knocked from my lungs by a gust of wind. “Do you want a ride, Hannah?”

Behind me Hannah smiled apologetically, wiping her hands with a wet wipe she must’ve pulled from her purse. The smell of disinfectant was harsh, but I kept my mouth shut; she didn’t have a lot of experience with blood, and even the few drops that colored her fingertips could’ve been uncomfortable.

“I- I just… don’t like to talk about that. I’m sorry, James.” Furrowing my brows at the apology, I grunted as Hannah tossed the wet wipe into a nearby trash can. Eying her carefully, I hid my frown- she just didn’t seem like she’d just exposed a vulnerable, traumatic moment. “Uh-sure? I don’t have to go to work until 8p.m..”

“I just have to stop at my apartment and clean up.” Heading for my car, I fished out my keys as Hannah jogged to keep up with me. She was slim but muscular; her legs might not have been long, but she had hips and a waist to make up for it. Watching her out of the corner of my eye, I wondered silently if she had faint abs underneath her turtleneck.

“So, do you and your brothers live together?” My lip twitched, but Hannah didn’t notice as she busied herself with opening the passenger side door. She asked so many questions, and surprisingly enough I was more than happy to answer. Sliding into the driver’s seat, I turned on my car before opening my mouth.

“Sort of. We live in different apartments in the same building. I don’t think I could handle living with Ethan’s lazy ass. If he put as much effort into the company as he does with his girlfriends- or even half the amount- he’d be a pretty competent businessman.”

“He has more than one?” Nodding as I twisted to pull out of my space, I couldn’t help but show my frown at Hannah’s thoughtful expression. When one heard ‘happy’ and ‘unable to frown’, the word ‘innocent’ also came to mind right afterwards. “That’s a lot of effort…”

“I guess he just finds women more attractive than success. Being in the military- most women look the same after a while…” Trailing off as I headed for the street, I blinked at the gasp that filled my car. Hannah’s dainty, slender elbow bumped mine, and a smirk spread across my face. “I said ‘most’…”

“Yeah, I know. I heard you tell me I’m pretty.”