11

Beast

Rampage

              I lost my fucking mind, and then Lala reeled that shit right back in for me. She brought me right back, wanting me… needing me.

Me.

No one else but me.

I learned some shit in the last twenty-four hours. Learned that Lala has a bigger hold on me than I thought was possible. There is just something about her. It’s the sincerity, and the fight in her eyes. It’s something that I will fight for if it keeps her in my life. Something I have no way of explaining. Maybe it’s the way she cuddles up next to me when she sleeps, always able to find me. Could be the way those blue eyes shine when she looks at me, like she can look past all the fucked up shit I do. No matter what I fucking do, she’ll always look at me like that. Didn’t know I had it in me to give a fuck, but I do. Didn’t know I could care about someone so goddamn much, but I do. All I know is I want her. I want all of her – body, mind, and soul.

I don’t want to share her. I would have never thought a bitch taking her clothes off for money would bother me, but seeing Lala do it… yeah, well. Let’s just say I’m not a fucking fan. She wants to give me a private show, I am so down for that shit. She has moves I’ve never seen from a pole dancer. Seeing her hurt also ranks pretty fucking low on the shit I don’t ever want to see again. Without a doubt, I will kill someone, slowly, for touching her in any way.

Her little friend is a pile of shit. A little puke I would have no issues putting down. Fuck, I can’t kill him because he’s in deep with another club... A club we’re good with. We used to have major issues with them ‘cause they killed some of my brothers and fucked shit up in a big way for us. A club I do not want a repeat war with. Ryan owes them money, a whole fuck load of money. It’s enough money that they want him alive so they can recoup it or kill him themselves,  so I can’t do shit to that worthless snot without starting a world war all over again, but I can keep Lala away from him.

If I start a war, I’ll have to worry about Lala’s safety, along with my brothers and their families. Definitely not trying to bring that shit down on my family, but I will if I have to. I’ll let it rest for now.

Lala’s lying on me, well, more like thrown over me. It’s creeping up on eight in the morning. It’s too goddamn early to be awake, and to fucking late to go to bed, but all I want to do is this. No idea how shit’s gonna be tomorrow, but this, this shit right here with Lala on me, makes all that bad shit worth it.

A few hours later, I wake up alone. Lala is nowhere to be found. Fuck. Shoving out of bed, I go through the club looking for her when I hear a bunch of voices coming from the kitchen. Walking in, I find the whole damn clan in there. The old ladies are sitting at the breakfast bar drinking coffee and laughing. The brothers are everywhere else, hovering over all the food. Everyone has a plate in their hands, shoving food in their faces. Haven’t seen this shit in a long time.

Walking up to Lala, I grab her arm, “What the hell ya doin?”

Catching an elbow to the side, Leo gives me a nasty snarl, “Don’t stop her now. She’s feedin’ my old ass next.”

“Shut up, old man.”

Lala gives Leo a sweet smile and hands him a plate full of something that reminds me that I’m hungry as fuck.

“You want some?” she asks sweetly. That’s a loaded fucking question. “We made a few pans of baked French toast if you’re hungry.”

Her eye looks a little better this morning. It’s still black and blue, but the swelling is almost gone. Her lip looks alright, too. I got a few stiches in there and the splits seem to be healing nicely.

“How you feelin’ this mornin’?” Looking around the room with a sad look in her eyes, she looks back at me she sighs, “Good. Just happy to be here.” And she is. She’s back to looking like that sweet ass Lala I first met.

****

              It’s another Sunday barbeque with everyone hanging out like normal, except for the shit that happened last night. For us, it’s just another day. It wasn’t nothing my brothers haven’t seen before. Fuck, it’s not something most of them haven’t done. I don’t feel bad about it and I’d do it again. Motherfuckers start fucking with shit that belongs to me, I’m gonna fuck back harder. That guy was a point that needed to be made. I told Ryan to stay away and I wasn’t fucking around. We’ll see if he got it.

I’m not sure how Lala feels. She keeps that shit buried deep. Honestly, she wasn’t nearly as upset about it as I would have thought. It was like she didn’t really see it, or blocked it out. Hell, maybe she just didn’t fucking care. She woke up this morning smiling at me like not a goddamn thing happened. Guess I should be good with that. If she’s okay, then I’m okay. She’s good and I’m not gonna fuck with it.

Standing around outside, Tank and Tiny are grilling under the old tin carport on the side of the club, and I just got done pounding Kash’s face into the mat. The girls are in the kitchen being loud as fuck. Gave them a bottle of whiskey and now they won’t shut the hell up, Lala included.

I know we need to have some sort of talk; get some shit squared away. No fucking clue how to approach something like that, so I just dive right the fuck in, “Lala?”

“Yeah?” She calls back from the kitchen.

“Lala!” Jesus Christ.

“What?” She says sticking her head around the corner.

“C’mere,” I tell her. She’s making her way toward me when I ask, “What do you want to do?” I know what I want, but I have to tell myself this is her life, and what I want really doesn’t fucking matter. She’s a grown ass woman and she’s gonna do whatever the fuck she wants to.

“You mean today?”

“No, Lala. With this whole fucked up situation you’ve got goin’.”

“I don’t know,” she whispers. “I mean, this is your club. Your life. If you want me to go, you only have to say it and I’ll go.” I know this is my life and I want her in it in some way, because right now, I sure as fuck haven’t had enough of her yet.

“Got a place a few miles from here. You can stay there as long as ya want.” Her face lights up and she looks like I’ve given her the best fucking news of her life.

“Really?” Here we go again.

“Yes, Lala. When ya gonna learn I mean what I say?”

“Where will you stay?” Here, there, wherever. I’m easy. Need a bed and that’s pretty much it. Never needed much. “I stay here most of the time. Might spend one night a week there.”

“I don’t want to take your home.”

“I’ll stay there more if you want me there. You want to come here with me, that’ll work too.” Never thought I’d bend for a woman, but here I am, rearranging my life to accommodate her. I’m turning into that guy. I hate those guys.

“I’m gonna have shit to do, so you’ll have to figure it out, but I’ll be around. There’ll always be someone around.”

She smiles and nods, “Okay, Rampage.”

Easy and compliant. Fuck, I like her that way. We had our little talk. Instead of walking her ass back into the kitchen she’s standing in front of me staring.

“Yeah?” Apparently she’s not done with me.

Taking a step toward me, she reaches her hand out and touches my chest where my tattoo is.

“What’s up?”

“Why don’t you have more tattoos?” That’s an odd question.

“You want me to have more?”

Bringing those big beautiful blue eyes up to mine, she shrugs and quirks her lips, “Nah, but why only the two?”

“Because, Lala. I’m scary as fuck without a bunch. I’m six-five, and like two-eighty with scars ‘n a fuckin’ rap sheet. Adding a fuck ton of tattoos to that would have every person avoiding me on the sidewalk ‘n in line at the store. I’m scary enough without ‘em babe.” Shaking her head, she smiles at me.

“Well I think you’re beautiful, and maybe someday, you can tell me the story of why you got the dick piercings. Not that I’m complaining, just curious.” And with that, she turns on her heels leaves me staring after her, trying to figure out what she just said. Beautiful? She’s had way too fucking much to drink.