CHAPTER 21

 

“Wow,” Cate felt like she could breathe again.  The final whistle had gone and Rovers had beaten Everton 2-1, boosting their chances of playing in the Europa League next season.

  “Come on, time for bed,” Cate said as Lola stifled a yawn.

  “But they might talk to Daddy?” Lola pouted.  “Just five more minutes, please?”

  “Fine,” Cate rolled her eyes, “but after that, you’ve got to go straight to sleep, it’s very late.”

  “Waiting in the tunnel we’ve got Man of the Match Jack Yoakam and the winning goalscorer, Kian Warner.” 

  “Daddy,” Lola squealed and moved closer to the TV.

  Cate watched as Kian lifted up a hand to scratch his eyebrow and there on his hand was his wedding ring.  She blinked, thinking there must be some mistake – Kian never wore his ring – but there it was.  Then in case she hadn’t seen it the first time, he reached up and ran a hand through his hair and she saw it again.  She reached down and rubbed where her own wedding ring used to be.  It felt bare.

  Later that night, Kian phoned.  Ever since Lola’s birthday party, he’d called Cate every night.  “Is she asleep?”  He was gutted that he hadn’t been able to say goodnight to Lola.  “Traffic was a bitch; I’ve only just got home.”

  Cate looked down at their daughter, sleeping peacefully, clutching her Dad’s England shirt.  She leaned down and gently kissed Lola’s forehead. 

  She took the phone upstairs with her to her attic bedroom.  “I gave her a goodnight kiss from you.”

  “So, um…” Kian sounded nervous, “did you watch the match?”

  “I did.”  They discussed the match for a little bit and then Kian asked, “what about the interview afterwards, did you see that?”

  “You had your ring on?”

  “When you said that about being my dirty, little secret… I realised what it must have looked like.  I should have asked you and Lola to come to Portugal with me.  I’m so fucking proud to be your husband, Cate.  I was just trying to protect you from all the bullshit that comes with my job.” 

  “Why does everybody think that they need to protect me all the time?” Cate asked.  “I’m not a little girl.”

  “Because they love you.  I love you,” Kian said, “just the thought of anyone hurting you, it kills me.”

  With his words warming her insides, Cate curled up on her bed, “It’s not just you, I need to take responsibility too.  I never should have enrolled at university as Cate Klein, that’s not who I am anymore.”

  “Do you still have my ring?”

  “Are you thinking about wearing it again?” Kian asked.  Cate couldn’t miss the hope in his voice.

  “I don’t know,” Cate answered honestly.  “I just need to know that it’s safe.”

  “It is, I’m looking after it for you,” Kian said.  “You’re going to tell them then, Vanessa and Thom?”

  “I think so, yes,” Cate said.  “I just wish I knew how they’d take it?”

 

Cate tossed and turned all night.  She was so nervous about telling Vanessa and Thom the truth.  Would they hate her for lying to them all this time?

  She got to the university campus far too early and sat in the quiet refectory waiting for them to arrive.  The clock above the door seemed to turn so slowly.  What if they’re running late? Cate panicked.  She couldn’t wait until after class to talk to them; her stomach felt like it was on a spin cycle.  Suddenly, the doors swung open and Cate recognised Vanessa’s tumbling mass of auburn curls.

  “Hey,” Vanessa waved, spotting Cate across the refectory. 

  “Where’s Thom?”

  “He’s getting the brews,” Vanessa looked over her shoulder.  “There he is.”

  Thom navigated his way through the tables carrying three Styrofoam cups of coffee.

  “Thanks,” Cate took her cup and put it to one side.  She was so wired already; the last thing she needed was caffeine.  “I need to tell you something.”

  “Okay,” Vanessa said.  “Damn it,” she pulled a pencil out of her hair, “Thom, stop hiding things in my hair.”

  Cate twisted one of the rings she wore to hide the white band of skin on her wedding finger.  It was so hard.  She couldn’t look at their faces so she stared at the bumpy surface of the Styrofoam cup.  “You know that guy that was waiting outside uni the other day?”

  “Your brother’s friend,” Thom nodded.

  “Ooh, he was F-I-N-E, Fine,” Vanessa giggled before Thom gave her a look.

  “He’s not my brother’s friend,” Cate stumbled over her words.  “Well, he is but he’s not just that.  He’s my husband.  He’s Lola’s Dad.”

  “But I thought you said Lola’s Dad wasn’t in the picture,” Vanessa frowned.

  “We’ve been separated since Christmas,” Cate said.  “It’s complicated because he’s kind of famous.”

  Vanessa smiled.  “Now, I know you’re joking.”

  “I’m not,” Cate pulled out her phone.  “His name’s Kian Warner and he’s a footballer for Manchester Rovers.”

  Vanessa looked at Thom, “have you heard of him?”

  Thom nodded.  Cate found the photo Jean had taken of the three of them before Kian left for the World Cup.  “Oh my God,” Vanessa said, loud enough that the people sat at the tables nearby turned around.

  She handed Cate her phone back and got up from the table.  “I need some air.”

  Cate got up to follow her but Thom put a hand on her arm.  “Let her go,” he said softly.

  “But I need to explain,” Cate said.  “I never meant to hurt her.”

  “I know,” Thom said.

  Cate looked at him, “how can you be so calm about all of this?”

  “I’m not as…” he searched for the right words, “I guess I’m not as emotional as Vanessa.  Also, I saw the story that came out about him and I’m guessing you’ve had a really hard time these last few months.”

  “You could say that,” Cate said, blinking away tears.  “I don’t deserve a friend like you, Thom.”

  “Sure you do,” Thom shrugged.  “Everybody has their secrets, Cate.”

  “Do you think Vanessa will ever forgive me?”

  “I think so,” Thom said.  He looked down at his watch.  “Come on, let’s go to class.”

  “What about Vanessa?” Cate asked, looking around.

  “I’ll take notes for her,” Thom said.  “Heaven knows, it won’t be the first time.”

 

“How did it go?” Liv asked when Cate came downstairs to the basement; she’d just put Lola to bed.

  Cate shrugged, “that girl loves her sleep.”

  She felt a kernel of popcorn smack her on the cheek, “I wasn’t talking about Lola, you goofball, I was talking about Vanessa and Thom, you were going to tell them about Kian today, right?”

  “I did.  Vanessa’s not speaking to me.”  Cate flopped down on the other end of the couch and pulled the duvet over her cold feet.  She was hoping that movie night with her sister would take her mind off everything.

  Ever since Cate had made her watch Jane Eyre a couple of weeks ago, Liv had become obsessed with the actor Michael Fassbender.

  “What movie have you picked?” Cate asked, reaching for a handful of popcorn.

  “Fish Tank,” Liv handed Cate the box and surprise, Michael Fassbender was in this one too.

  “He’s not going to be all skin and bones with bed sores in this one, is he?” Cate teased.  Last week, they’d watched Hunger.

  “No, course not,” Liv huffed.  “Anyway, he had to be skinny in that one because he was playing a guy on a hunger strike.”

  “Yeah, well those bed sores totally put me off my pizza,” Cate joked.  It was just too easy.

  “Shut up,” Liv threw a cushion at Cate, “or I’ll make you watch Badminton in the Garden again.”

  Liv was particularly obsessed with one of the deleted scenes from Jane Eyre.

  Cate shook her head, “you’re obsessed.  You need, like a 12-step program or something.”

  After they’d finished watching the movie, Cate picked the empty popcorn bowl up off the floor.  “Why doesn’t he ever do a nice rom-com?”

  “He likes conflict,” Liv said.  “Most romantic comedies are boring.”

  “I like boring,” Cate said, thinking about the last 12 months.  “At least there were no bed sores in this one.”