Chapter Five
“What?” Ryan and I screamed the sentiment at the same time.
Damien nodded. “You’re absolutely right. It would be dangerous for me to send you away without any kind of protection, so I’m sending Ryan with you. He’s going to keep an eye on you and keep you safe.”
“I don’t need him!” I spat, glaring at the handsome man across the room.
“Really? Seems to me that you would have been road kill if I hadn’t come along and saved your ass,” he retorted.
The comment made my blood boil and I had the sudden urge to run across the room and clock him as hard as I could in the jaw. Damien blocked my view of him and looked down at me. “This isn’t negotiable, Kisha. You’re going to Gatlinburg with Ryan.”
My stomach turned at the idea. Gatlinburg was beautiful. It was full of people and of things to do. I’d been there a few times when I was younger and I remembered it being rather romantic. I didn’t want to go on a romantic cabin get away with Ryan. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to hold myself together.
“Can you imagine how upset our father would be to hear you arguing with me like this?” Damien whispered.
That made my blood run cold. I looked at him for a moment, my eyes glassy. The words felt like a betrayal, but I knew he was right. They cut deep and I had to swallow against the tears that burned behind my eyes. I missed Dad, but Damien was right. Dad always said that you didn’t argue with the leader. Damien took on the responsibility of everyone’s safety when he accepted this role. That responsibility came with respect.
“I’m going to walk you home so you can pack. You and Ryan are going to leave on one of the trailers so no one can see you, do you understand?”
I nodded slowly. “I don’t need you to walk with me,” I whispered. “Just let me be alone for a few minutes.
He set his jaw and it was clear he didn’t like the idea, but I didn’t really care. He wasn’t going to give me this and I wasn’t going to fight him for it even though I deserved this. My entire life was being snatched away from me all of a sudden.
Chloe looked up at me, her hands had finally stopped shaking and she actually looked calm. “Can I come with you?” she asked softly.
I sighed but nodded. “I guess.”
She nodded and slid off the pool table, kissing Damien’s cheek. Damien led us out of the bar and down the sidewalk, taking us to the small house I lived in. I had lived with Damien until Chloe came into the picture, but when they got together, I felt like I was imposing. They were young newlyweds and I’m sure they wanted to do things I didn’t want to see.
I told Damien I wanted to move out and he helped me move my things in the small one-bedroom cabin on the edge of the community. It butted up right to the woods, which I loved. I could spend my mornings on the back porch, reading and listening to the bird’s sing. I treasured those times more than anything.
I went up to my bedroom, leaving Damien at the door. Chloe settled on my bed as I grabbed a suitcase and started to pack the basic necessities. I didn’t want to pack much because I didn’t plan on being on this little trip for long. I was sure that Damien would lead a charge right into their hide out and take them out in a blaze of glory. I had to believe it, or I’d go nuts.
“Are you okay?” Chloe asked softly.
“No. I just got shot at and then my brother dumped me off on a man who used to be my best friend but started ignoring me when we hit puberty. I’m pretty fucking far from alright,” I snorted, throwing clothes in my suitcase.
“Maybe you two can try and work out whatever problems you have,” Chloe suggested.
“I don’t want to work them out! Not with that asshole!” I snapped.
“Kisha, you have to stop being so angry. People do weird things for weird reasons.”
“Well, no reason is going to make up for what he did,” I whispered.
A silence fell between us and Chloe studied me for a moment. “You cared about him, didn’t you?”
“Absolutely not,” I said simply.
She frowned and sighed. “You know, at some point you’re going to have to stop lying to yourself.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Chloe just shook her head slowly and stood up, starting to grab things that I probably never would have thought to bring for myself. She handed me some books and a necklace I liked. “At least try to enjoy yourself a little while you’re out there, okay?”
I looked down, feeling guilt well up inside of me. How was I supposed to enjoy myself when I knew my friends and family were putting themselves in danger to save me? I couldn’t. I swallowed and shook my head. “Don’t worry about it, okay?”
Chloe sighed and wrapped her arms around me. I pulled her onto the bed with me and tried to hold back the tears. I was being so stupid and so stubborn but I couldn’t help it. It was the only way I knew how to protect myself.
I eventually fell asleep curled up with my friend, my face buried in her shoulder. I felt safe here. I felt like I could let my guard down and so as I dozed off a single, solitary tear fell down my cheek. I was going to have to face the thing I had been avoiding for so long and that scared me.
I was going to have to face why Ryan and I never worked out.