Chapter Seven
Living with Ryan was hell because I was constantly battling these conflicting feelings. I was so damn attracted to him, but I was also mad at him for abandoning me when I needed him most. The worst part about it was that he didn’t even seem to notice. He just walked around, acting like he didn’t do anything wrong and maybe in his mind, he hadn’t. It was infuriating.
I knew he thought I was crazy. There were days where I'd just stare at him, watching him go about his business. He would catch me and give me a strange look, but I never addressed it. I would just put my head down and go back to my book. It was driving him crazy.The fact that I couldn't talk to Chloe or my brother only made things worse. Our brief phone calls on a local payphone wasn’t enough. I had to be vague about what was going on and where I was in case the phones were tapped.
So far they'd had no luck tracking down Uroboros. They were staying well-hidden I could hear the frustration in my brother's voice every time he talked about it. He felt like he was letting me down and I tried to reassure him that I was enjoying my vacation, but he knew it was a lie. I loved our community. It was the only thing I knew. I'd grown up a biker and I wanted to live my life as a biker.
Ryan wasn't making things any easier. Since he was as dense as concrete, he had a habit of walking around half dressed. This put me on edge, though I tried to ignore it. He was a fan of going out to the jacuzzi and settling in for a nice long soak. It was clear that he intended to enjoy himself while he was here.
He'd tried to talk to me a few times in the month that we'd been banished to this cabin, but I made it clear that I wanted nothing do to with him. When he asked me questions I gave short, curt answers. It annoyed the hell out of him and I loved it. It made me feel powerful.
Maybe it was a bitchy thing to do and maybe I should have let go of everything, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I'd had so many hopes for us and so many feelings for him, and I felt like he had just thrown that on the ground and stomped it with his boot. I felt like he didn't give a shit about me and I had felt invisible for so long.
Winter was just around the corner and Gatlinburg was a big ski destination. The only times I'd been up here were to ski. Dad had always been a big fan of it and taught us at a fairly early age. If I was going to be stuck in this cabin with Ryan, I was at least going to enjoy my time here.
Ryan emerged from the kitchen in nothing but Pajama pants and I somehow managed to ignore his smooth tattooed torso. God I loved a man with ink. I was slipping into my snow boots and I didn't even look up when he addressed me.
"Where do you think you're going?" he asked.
The arrogance in his voice pissed me off so bad. I grit my teeth to try and stay somewhat calm. "I'm going skiing."
"You didn't run that by me."
God. Fuck this guy. I stood up and stared him straight in the eye, ignoring the fact that he was a good half foot taller than me, probably more. My eyes were wild with rage but he didn’t back down.
“I don’t need your permission. You aren’t my daddy,” I spat.
He crossed his arms over his chest. “I might not be your daddy, but your brother put you in my care and I’m not going to let anything happen to you. If you’re going skiing, then so am I.”
I clenched my fists at my side and glared at him, my breaths coming in heavy, angry heaves. “Bullshit. You aren’t coming anywhere with me!” I snapped, grabbing the car keys and walking toward the door. He didn’t even have a shirt on yet. I knew I could get out of the house before he got dressed.
He grabbed me and yanked me away from the door. “Why are you always acting like such a brat?” he grunted. “I’m trying to keep you safe! Why are you fighting me so hard?”
“Because I don’t need you to keep me safe!” I snapped, trying to swing at him. “I can take care of myself!”
He set me down and gripped my shoulders, giving me a good shake. “Will you shut up for a second? Listen! Getting someone else’s help doesn’t mean you’re weak and it doesn’t mean you can’t take care of yourself, but some things in this world just aren’t meant to be taken on by a single person! Don’t you understand that?”
Tears were threatening to spill. This was the most he’d acted like he cared about me since we were kids and it was breaking my heart. I had to get out of there. I reacted on instinct. I pulled my arm back and I knocked him square in the jaw. I didn’t hit him hard enough to do any lasting damage, but it was enough to startle him. He stumbled back and fell on his ass, eyes wide.
Before he could get up, I snatched the keys off the hard wood floor and ran for the car. My heart was pounding in my chest and I slammed on the gas, spinning out of the driveway. My eyes were wide and I felt panicked. I wasn’t panicked about the bikers after my life. I wasn’t panicked about being away from my family.
I was panicked over how damn close I’d come to kissing that bastard.