December

Anna—Sixteen Years Old

I’m in love with Charlie Nelson. It took me a while to fall in love with him.

After having a great time together at homecoming last year, we started hanging out regularly. It was so easy to be around him. We became friends first, though it was always obvious that he really liked me. He’s as subtle as a sledgehammer. But he was patient with me.

He makes me laugh. Makes me feel special. Makes me feel like I’m the only girl in the world.

And, last night, we lost our virginity together.

“Oh my God! You did the deed? How was it? Tell me everything!” Molly squeals, lying on her stomach across my bed, her head propped up in her hands, while I sit on the floor, wrapping Christmas presents.

“It was amazing.” I flush, thinking about the romantic date he planned for us.

His parents and siblings were out of the house, and he cooked me dinner. So what if it was only boiling spaghetti and warming up premade tomato sauce out of a jar? Seeing him try so hard to impress me made me feel all warm and gooey inside.

When he brought me up to his room after dinner, my stomach fluttered with anticipation. By the time he finished lighting the candles he’d set on every surface, I was breathless. He took it slow, undressing me, kissing me senseless, and making sure I was ready.

“Did it hurt?”

“Well, yeah, but he was pretty perfect.”

“Did it feel good?”

My cheeks flame. Charlie made sure I felt good before he pushed inside me, warning me that he wasn’t going to last very long. And he was right; the first time was pretty quick. But he tended to my tender parts, and round two was much better.

Molly laughs. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen your cheeks so red. Come on, Anna! You can tell me. I told you all about my first time.”

Molly is not shy when it comes to talking about getting physical. But I can’t help cringing at the thought of saying what we did out loud. It’s so…personal.

I cover my cheeks with my hands and laugh. “It felt good, okay? Is that what you want to hear?”

“Yes! I knew Charlie would take good care of you. You’re so lucky you found him!”

I am lucky.

A knock sounds on my door about two seconds before it opens, and John walks into the room.

“Hey! Please don’t barge in here!” I scold. I’d never hear the end of it if I barged into his room.

“Oh, please. It’s not like I’m going to catch you doing anything inappropriate.” He rolls his eyes.

“I wouldn’t be so sure about that,” Molly singsongs under her breath.

“Shh,” I hiss at her.

The last thing I want to do is talk to my brother about my sex life.

“What?” He, of course, picks up on this little exchange.

“Nothing,” I say quickly. “What do you need?”

He quietly studies me for a second, then looks back to Molly, raising his eyebrows. I calmly continue taping up the wrapping paper and pretend my cheeks aren’t bright red. Molly wiggles her eyebrows up at John, a mischievous glint in her eye. I know that she’s always had a crush on him, but he’s never paid her much attention before.

He turns back to me, and I see a bag in his hand. “Can you wrap these for me?”

“Seriously? Why can’t you wrap them?”

“Come on, Anna. You’re way better at this than I am. Please?” He gives me his puppy-dog eyes.

“Okay, fine.” I hold my hand out to take his bag of gifts to wrap.

“You’re the best, Anna Banana.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

“You staying for dinner, Molly?” he asks her.

“Maybe.”

“You should stay. Wesley’s coming over, too. He’s down in the dumps because Ellen broke up with him.”

My ears perk up at this. Freaking Ellen. I still hate her. I’m not jealous, but it’s like Pavlov’s dogs. Every time I hear her name, I remember how it felt to see Wesley kiss her that first time.

“Maybe I can help cheer him up,” Molly says coyly.

My eyes snap to hers. She can’t be serious. She meets my glare and winks at me.

John chuckles, and my blood boils. “You’re too young for Wesley, Molls.”

“Pft. Whatever you say, Johnny Boy. We’re only two years younger than you guys.”

Is she trying to convince him that she’s going to cheer Wesley up? Do I care?

I think of Charlie. His smile, his dimples. The way he took such good care of me last night. Those sighs and touches. Charlie does everything he can to show me how much he wants me.

So, I don’t care about Molly cheering Wesley up.

Not one bit.