J.J.
Well, it happened. I lost her. After all of the shit we’ve been through, this was the final fucking nail in our coffin. I fight to control my breathing, anxiety, and anger as I jog down the stairs to the kitchen.
Belle’s sweet laugh fills my home. Our home. Without them, this place would be nothing but an overpriced elaborate mansion. I can’t lose them.
“Cowboy!” Belle waves me over. “I made you a gift.”
I stride to her, pulling her to my chest and squeezing the ever-loving hell out of her.
“Look.” She grabs my cheeks, forcing me to look down.
A rectangle pizza with all of my favorite toppings and in the dead center three words that have brought me back to life. If I were the crying type, I’d be a mess right now.
“I can’t eat that.”
“Why?” Belle frowns.
I kiss her forehead. “Because it’s too damn pretty and perfect.”
“You like?” She raises both eyebrows.
“I love it just like I love you.”
Kemp and Faye study me as if they’re waiting for me to implode. They aren’t far off from the truth. Belle and her innocence is the only thing keeping me grounded at the moment.
I settle in with her on my lap as we eat our pizza. I sliced out the center of the pizza to eat first. I didn’t miss the pride in Belle’s eyes as she ate her cheese pizza. Her swift fingers picked a few pieces of pepperoni off my slice, popping them in her mouth.
“Where’s Mommy?” she asks after the last bite.
“Just checked on her. She’s lying down. Let’s let her sleep, and we will get you ready for bed.”
Belle pops out her lower lip. “Cowboy, can you help me?”
“Of course.” I rest my cheek on the top of her head. “Always.”
After a massive tub overfilling with bubbles, me slipping on my ass on the tiles, three bedtime stories, and several goodnight kisses, Belle sleeps in my arms. I’ve rocked her for hours, not wanting to let go of her. It’s not until I hear moving noises in my room that I get up and lay her in her bed. I pull the thick, fluffy pink comforter up to her chin and kiss her forehead one more time.
“I want to be your daddy. By your side for the rest of your life. Please, God, don’t take her out of my life.”
I take one last long look before leaving the room. As I enter my room, Navy is crawling in bed, burrowing under the blankets. Her creamy skin is lit up by the moonlight shining through the massive window. The bathroom light is left on, which leads me to assume she was using it.
It’s a common occurrence with her these days. The thing is I’m by her side in those moments. It’s our thing. She’s told me why, and I love standing there by her side.
I forgo the shower, stripping out of my clothes and boxers and climbing in bed. I don’t think twice before I scoot to her side and pull her back to my chest, pressing my nose in the crook of her neck, inhaling her scent.
“Don’t leave me, Navy, please,” I beg.
She stiffens in my arms.
I don’t stop telling her everything about Whitley from the day I found her to the day she left. I didn’t leave out any of the nasty details or the fact I never responded to her while she was in Europe. I open up about my feelings of feeling empty and hurt when Whitley wasn’t in my life. And how I’ve always focused on fixing others and not myself.
“You are different. You are not a project, Navy. You never were from the moment I saw you. I’m so fucking sorry if you felt that way. Don’t leave me.”
Navy takes her time rolling over in my arms. She plants a palm on my chest. “You hurt me. It killed me seeing another woman walking into your house, grabbing you, and kissing you.”
“I’m sorry. I handled it like an ass.” She presses a finger to my lip.
“I get it. Whitley loves you. She experienced the same things as I did with you. You brought us both back to life. I can’t hate her for that, but I can hate the way it made me feel.”
“She didn’t experience the same as you, Sparrow. Please listen to me when I tell you she never got my heart as you did.”
Her finger pushes harder into my lip this time. “Shut up and let me talk. I know that. The simple fact you gave me your heart along with your love is what grounded me. You never once held my past over my head. Hell, not even the child I’m carrying.”
I grab her wrist and pull her hand away and correct her. “Our child.”
She rolls her eyes. I can barely make it out in the moonlight. “Our child. You know what I meant. It’s not fair for me to hold your past against you. I’m learning here, J.J. I’m not used to the power of your love.”
“You’re staying?” Christ, it sounds ridiculous. A grown ass man in his own bed, forcing Navy to say the exact words I want to hear. I won’t believe it until I hear them from her full lips.
“I was never leaving. The thought crossed my mind, but the cold reality is I’m where I belong. I won’t run, J.J. I’ll get mad, angry, pissed off, and even cry, but I won’t run.”
“Say it again,” I whisper into her exposed collarbone.
She does.
“I will open up more. Tell you everything about my past. The good, bad, and ugly parts. It’s all yours, Sparrow. Everything. My heart. My days. My future.”
“I do,” she whispers.
I lift my head, studying her sparkling eyes and angelic features.
“I do,” she says again in a louder voice.
It takes me a handful of seconds to realize what she’s saying. I lift up on one elbow with a smirk on my face and repeat the two words back to her.
“I do.” I close my eyes shut. “Jesus, I do for the rest of my days.”
Her delicate fingers come up to my face, grazing my jawline. I’m convinced it’s her favorite part of me.
“The best wedding vows I’ve heard.”
“Yeah.” I smirk. “But don’t think you’ll be getting out of a big wedding.”
“Don’t need one after tonight.”
“Yeah, but ain’t gonna stop me from giving you the biggest and best.”
Navy presses her palm against my shoulder until I lie flat on my back. She straddles my hips, running her palms up and down my chest, not breaking eye contact.
“I have the biggest and best underneath me, and J.J., that will always be more than enough. My cup runneth over.”
“I love you.”
My breath hitches low in my chest when Navy wraps her palm around my throbbing dick. She strokes me up and down, slow and precise. My hands roam up and down her fleshy thighs. I stop near her panty line. Navy stops me, moving my hands. I watch as she pulls them to the side and then sinks down on me.
I bow off the bed with the sensation of being sunk deep in her warm heat.
“Jesus, baby,” I hiss, gripping her hips tight.
Navy keeps her palms planted on my chest like I’m her foundation as she rolls her hips, throwing her head back, letting her long, rich chestnut waves flow down her back.
I bite my bottom lip, nearing release, watching her take control, work herself, and finding her pleasure. This woman is my everything and has blossomed from the rubble of ashes.
“J.J.,” she moans, her nails digging into my flesh.
“Fuck, you feel good,” I hiss, pushing back my release. “Fuck me, Navy. Take it all, baby. This cock is yours.”
Her hips roll faster, grinding into the base of my cock. The pleasure heightens each sensation, taking me to places I’ve never dreamed of.
“I’m com—” Her words are cut off with her moans and whimpers.
The hot heat of Navy swallows my cock, gripping it tight, and I fall with her. I’ll always fall with her.