Julien
Taking a break from my paperwork, I stood up and stretched, rolling my neck at the same time.
Suzanne and I were at my house, still working through the details of my case, but the stress of figuring everything out was getting to me. Coupled with the fact that I was missing Ellie. Another new emotion that she had stirred up within me - something that I hadn’t felt in a very long time.
Suzanne looked up from her notes, placing her pen down.
“Is everything okay, Juju?”
“It’s Julien. Like I told you.” My voice was cold as I directed my frustration at her. She held up her palms in defence.
“Sorry, I’m just a creature of habit. Now tell me, what’s wrong?”
I looked out towards my pool, memories flooding back of last Thursday night, when Ellie stood out there. Too fucking long ago.
“Nothing’s wrong. I just want this shit to be over and done with.”
“Julien, I’m doing my best. As you know, her lawyer is being somewhat uncooperative.”
“Try harder, Suzanne. That’s what I’m paying you for!”
She paused, looking at my fixedly. “It’s Ellie, isn’t it? She’s got under your skin.”
I snapped my head towards her. “Why do you mean?”
“Well, it’s clear that you’re somewhat…taken by the young lady. Just be careful, okay?” She stood up and moved closer to me, her perfume immediately feeling too overpowering on my senses compared to Ellie’s soft and sensual scent.
“Careful? What the hell for?”
She reached out to stroke my cheek, the small action once again showing her attempt at power over me. I jerked my face away and she didn’t hide her scowl. “All I’m saying is don’t expect her to stick around. She’ll be back home before you know it, back in the UK…and you’ll be left here…all alone.”
She moved back to take her seat, picking up her pen once again. “I’d hate to see you finally fall for someone and then have your heart broken. It’s probably best to stop this before it’s really begun.” She shrugged her shoulders and picked up her note pad.
“You know nothing about us, Suzanne. Please, don’t assume that you do, nor make any assumptions about her. Our personal life has nothing to do with you.”
“Fine, Julien! Just don’t say I haven’t warned you.”
I shook my head and grabbed my cell, irritated by her words. Part of me knew she was right - Ellie was only here for a year and then she would be returning back home to London - unless I could convince her otherwise. I almost stopped in my tracks as I processed my thoughts. Feelings for Ellie were coming hard and fast. It was torture not being able to see her over the weekend and I couldn’t wait a moment longer. Walking outside and sliding the door shut behind me for privacy, I dialled her number knowing that she would be on her lunch break.
“Hi, Julien, how are you?” Her sweet voice came through the line, immediately soothing my frustrations.
“Hey, baby. It’s going okay.” I walked over to the pool, adjusting my sunglasses, wishing more than anything that she was here with me now.
“Are you sure, you don’t sound okay, darling?” Her concerned voice somehow broke down my defences. I sighed deeply.
“I guess…I’m not okay, Ellie. But I can’t talk right now. Can I see you tonight?”
“Yes, of course. Do you want to come over to mine?”
“Sure, I’ll be there at seven.”
We hung up a few minutes later but it was so good to hear her voice and I immediately felt better at the premise of seeing her later this evening, hoping to relieve some of this God-awful tension. Not normally a fan of admitting weakness, I knew that she was a good thing for me and she needed to be treated with respect and honesty. I wasn’t into playing any games or any of that other shit with her - I had enough fucking head games to deal with at present.
Somehow I got through the day with Suzanne and after a quick session with my trainer, I was showered and ready for dinner with Ellie. At exactly seven o’clock, I was standing outside her apartment, waiting for her to buzz me in.
She flung open the door looking sexy as fuck standing there in cut off shorts and a simple black t-shirt. Before she could utter a word, I pulled her against me, placing my hands on the small of her back and slammed the door closed with my foot. I kissed her hard and rough, not tenderly or innocently, but like a man with a hunger that came from somewhere deep within me. I needed her, had to ravage her beautiful mouth against mine and breathe in her intoxicating scent. Her hands came up to my face, pressing against my stubble as I pushed her up against the wall. I bit her lip, softly pulling a little and the short stutter in her breathing told me she liked it. She pulled away, breathing deeply, her tits rising and falling against my chest. She smiled a little.
“Well, hello to you too.”
I wanted her badly, so I scooped her up in my arms and she let out a squeal of surprise.
“Bedroom?” I managed to growl and she raised an eyebrow, colouring lightly and nodding her head in the right direction. I walked quickly through the small apartment, and found her bedroom, which had a low queen-sized bed in the middle and bare furnishings around it. I dropped her right onto the middle of the bed and once again she squealed in surprise before the soft covers broke her fall. Throwing off my jacket, I dropped it onto the floor, then crawled over her. Without any words, she reached out her hand and placed it on the back of my head, bringing me closer to her mouth. Kissing the inside of her wrist and finding her mouth once again, we shared soft kisses together.
Her hands reached for my ass, where she tucked her fingers into my back pockets, pulling my groin towards her. Combined with the way she kept arching her back towards me, I could tell she also needed this connection and wanted it just as much as I did.
I sat her up and helped her pull off her t-shirt whilst I simultaneously and rapidly undid the buttons to my shirt, tossing it to the floor alongside with my pants. Ellie reached around her back with delicate hands and found the hooks of her bra, releasing them and then rolling her shoulders forward until the straps slid down her arms. She held that position for a moment, as I held my breath, for one last second of modesty before the white lace dropped away to land on top of her cast aside t-shirt.
I sat there gaping at perfection, knowing full well that I’d never have my fill of looking at her tits. She had the most beautiful pair I think I’d ever seen in my life, straight up, honest to God truth. They were full but not heavy, completely round with lush soft tips. The best part? Certified, one-hundred-percent natural. God, women paid me thousands of dollars to replicate these twin pair of beauties right here.
I couldn’t stop staring, hoping I wasn’t obviously drooling. Her dark pink nipples went from soft to hardening into tight buds right before my eyes. My raging hard-on was straining painfully against me. I wanted to see her eyes on my cock and know she was the one who made it that hard. To know what she did to me. I gently flicked my tongue on her nipple, kissing around it, slowly, before taking it in my mouth and licking it softly.
She moaned from somewhere deep in her chest and I pulled away, blowing on the nipple, now moist from my kiss. The sensation made her spasm gently under my hands. In between her stuttering breath, she moaned again, sounding like an ache. I wanted to be inside her, now. Peeling off her shorts and lacy underwear in one swift motion, I found her wet pussy with my fingers, exploring her walls with my index finger and push up against her clit with my thumb. She was soft and feminine under my hands, moaning, her beautiful body weak against mine.
“I want you now, Julien…inside me.” Her eyes were closed with pleasure as she continued to breathe heavily. Without a moment’s hesitation, desperate to bury myself inside her, I whipped the condom out of my pants, sliding it over my cock in seconds. Lining up the head against the lips of her pussy, it was tight, but so wet that I slid inside like she was made to fit me, out bodies interlocking perfectly.
“Oh, God. Yes,” she moaned.
I groaned right into her mouth as her hands buried deep into my hair, kissing each other, battling tongues in a desperate attempt to fully merge our bodies. I started to move against her, deep, full plunges into her over and over until everything else disappeared from thought and nothing else existed except her pussy and my cock fitting together in the most primal way possible.
She moaned louder, her body throbbed as I pushed my cock deeply inside of her. I felt her pussy start pulsating in waves against my cock as she started to come. Slamming into her harder, feeling the hot wet pulse of her orgasm tightening around my shaft; she screamed my name and there was no way I could hold back any longer.
I let myself go, releasing my lust for this woman, and the pent up tension, out of my balls. It rushed out of me and I threw my head back, savouring the moment before I looked back down at Ellie.
She was still breathing hard, a slow smile spreading against her beautiful face.
“Julien…just…wow.” She bit her lip, frowning slightly and I wondered what the hell would make her do that. I thought what we just experienced together was mind-blowing. Hesitantly, she asked, “Was it good for you?”
“Baby, that was incredible. I can’t begin to explain how much.”
She smiled as I rolled off her. “I agree…that was perfect.”
We managed to drag ourselves out of bed but I noticed she was unusually quiet over dinner, which she had beautifully prepared. Our easy conversation was somewhat stilted this evening.
“Ellie, you’re very quiet.”
She looked up from playing with her pasta and placed her fork down with a sigh. “I’m sorry…I er, I just have a lot on my mind.”
“Care to share?” I took a sip of my wine, wondering what was troubling my beautiful girl.
“Well, I don’t really know how to say this, Julien… I had a talk with Pieter last week and then a long talk with my father.” Her face twisted with worry, causing me concern. I waited patiently for her to continue, also placing my fork down, sensing some big. She drew a deep breath. “I’m so sorry to do this Julien, but I’ve decided to look for another job.”
I felt my heart begin to pound. She was leaving? Already?
“What? I don’t understand, Ellie. I thought you were happy? Where are you going?” Trying my best to keep my voice as cool as possible, I grabbed her hand across the table.
“Julien, I am so grateful for the intern position, really I am, but it’s just not what I want for a career. I’m so sorry but I want to work with kids, so I’m going to start looking for a role at some local hospitals.”
She looked up and I noticed her eyes were glistening. Local hospitals. I breathed a small sigh of relief, thankful that she was still intending to stay in LA. But I couldn’t bear the thought of not seeing her everyday - I had gotten used to her beautiful presence.
“Is this what you really want?”
She nodded, enthusiastically. “Very much so.”
I considered her decision, while she watched me intently, clearly extremely sure of what she wanted. It hit me instantly that I couldn’t bear to stand in the way of her dreams. Without thinking through my next thought, I spoke.
“I respect your decision, Ellie. Move in with me.”
“What?! Julien, that’s crazy!” She laughed, shaking her head, as she picked up her glass.
Crazy, yeah, I had to agree. But there was something about Ellie Hartley that told me she was special. Like no one else I’d met before. I wanted to take care of her, cherish this new-and-strange thing I was feeling for her.
“I agree, it’s a little premature but tell me you’re not feeling a strong connection too, Ellie? Tell me I’m wrong and I won’t ask again.”
She was quiet as she reviewed my argument. What was it about her that made me feel like a fucking teenager?
“Okay.” She said softly, nodding, after what felt like an eternity.
“What? You said yes?” I had to hear it again, wanted to make sure she knew what she was doing.
“Yes! Yes, I’ll move in with you, Julien. It’s bloody crazy, but okay, I’m going to take a chance on us!”
She got up from her seat and moved into my lap, throwing her arms around me. I grabbed her waist and kissed her deeply, overjoyed that she accepted my proposal, because for a moment there, I was almost scared she was going to tell me that my feelings weren’t reciprocated.
Perhaps with the stress and gossip of not working together gone, it would be even better between us now.
Julien
I slipped off my sunglasses as we entered the building. Addison’s lawyer had requested a face-to-face meeting.
“Let’s just get this over with as soon as possible. I want this done.”
Suzanne nodded, adjusting her collar as she walked beside me. “That’s the plan, Julien.”
She was cool and distant ever since she discovered that Ellie had moved in with me the previous week. Thinking of Ellie, her beautiful sweet face, her sexy and tight body brought a feeling of serenity over me. As soon as she’d agreed to my proposal, I had her things moved that same weekend. She thought I was crazy, that we were moving too fast, but neither of us could deny our chemistry together. So far, things were great as she settled herself into my house - our home - although with our crazy schedules the past week, I didn’t get to spend as much time with her as I’d liked. This case had taken over my life, looming over me constantly and I wanted a clean resolution today.
Ellie’s whispered words of encouragement this morning after our quick lovemaking had me feeling more relaxed about this meeting than I had expected. Announcing ourselves to the receptionist, we were soon ushered through to a conference room, where I spotted an older and prim looking man, who I assumed was her lawyer. And Addison, herself, sitting there looking bored with her arms crossed across her chest. I stopped to gaze at her for a moment before she looked up at me. Sure, she was pretty - with her platinum blonde hair (which I also knew didn’t match below), pouty lips, which were a glossy red and her slim figure, with enhanced tits, any normal guy would be hard over her. Except, I didn’t feel a thing as I looked at her. I hadn’t seen her in over six months and it was clear to me, although executed very well, that she had more fillers injected into her face. I thought of Ellie, with her beautiful, curvy and natural body and I knew now that no-one would compare to her. Ever.
Both Addison and her lawyer glanced up as we entered the room and took our seats opposite them. I could feel Addison’s stare burning into me as I got comfortable.
“Mr Berthou, Ms Corrigan, thank you for meeting with us. As you know, my name is Norman Clark and I’m representing Addison and the malpractice suit.”
I glanced at Addison, scowling as her face held a smirk directed at me. Jeez, what the fuck was it with my exes? I hadn’t the pleasure of ever stepping foot on Antarctica, but I’m sure the cool vibes I was receiving to the left of me, and opposite, would rival any breeze there.
“Let me just state for the record that the charges brought against me are utter garbage. I would have no reason to leak the information to the tabloids. My professional integrity is at stake!”
“Well then, who would, Julien? My fucking face is my business and I can’t have everyone speculating on what I have or haven’t had done!”
“Addison, Julien, please calm down. I understand how upsetting this is for you both.” Suzanne looked at both of us, a silent plea in her eye.
“Upsetting? You think I’m upset, Suzanne?” Addison leaned forward in her chair, slamming the table with her palms. “I’m livid!”
I shot Suzanne a dirty look, also sensing that Norman was getting flustered at the outburst.
“Addison, please, I’m not here for a shouting match. We’re both equally slandered here. I believe I have gotten to the bottom of this.”
Suzanne flashed me a look of surprise as I continued. I hadn’t had time to tell her what I had discovered last night.
Addison sighed, shrugging her shoulders defeatedly. “What more could you possibly have to say, Julien?”
“I know you were approached by a tabloid reporter. I just need to know - was it Courtney May?”
Addison glanced up, a slight look of confusion in her eyes. “Yeah, it was her - initially. So what?”
I took a deep breath, relieved. My suspicions were confirmed.
“I’m sorry, Addison, but you’re directing your suit at the wrong person. I don’t know if you’re aware but Nina was fired a few weeks ago for inappropriate behaviour.”
Addison smirked. “No, I wasn’t aware of that…but it doesn’t surprise me.” She shook her head, her red lips forming into a pout. “That woman was always a bitch to me!”
“I happen to know that she is also very good friends with Courtney.”
“What? Julien, are you sure?” Suzanne looked at me, shocked at my revelation.
I scowled. What a fucking waste of three weeks. If only I had the chance to speak to Addison before - had Suzanne set up a meeting with us, then all this shit and strain could have potentially been avoided.
“Perfectly sure, Suzanne.” I looked at both Norman and Addison who sat quietly, watching me. “You could always subpoena her phone records. But I’m confident you have your mole in Nina.”
“We’ll of course look into this, Mr Berthou, and if what you’re alleging is proven, we will re-direct our suit to Ms Fowler.”
I stood, nodding my head. This meeting was over. I had wasted enough time, happy to leave both Norman and Suzanne to work out the legalities.
“Julien!”
I looked over at Addison. “Yes?”
“A minute outside, please?”
Suzanne was watching us like a hawk as I held open the door for Addison. I would deal with her later - her days as my lawyer were swiftly drawing to a close.
“Julien, I’m sorry. I had no other choice.” Addison licked her lips, a small smile playing on her face. She came closer, placing her palm on my chest. “We can screw this out, forget about it…what do you say? I’ll make it up to you…I still remember how you like it…” She leaned in, fluttering her eyelids shut in preparation for a kiss. I took a step back, disgusted.
“Addison, I’m seeing someone now.”
Her eyes snapped open. “You? Do you even know the meaning of the word monogamy? Or commitment?” She laughed harshly, shaking her head.
“I guess I just never met anyone I wanted to commit to. Until now. If you’ll excuse me, Addison, I have patients waiting.” I stepped past her, catching her jaw drop open in my peripheral vision, hoping I’d never have the displeasure of seeing her again.
Two weeks later, I sat in my den, aimlessly flicking through the television channels. Frustrated, I threw the control onto the couch and, grabbing my beer, I walked outside into the night air. I reflected on the events of the past two weeks as I sipped the cool brew, looking out onto the lights below.
Ellie had quickly found a new nursing role at the Children’s Hospital, and had resigned from B&F a week ago. Penny was understandably upset, but they seemed thick as thieves and I knew they were still very much in touch. I was proud and impressed with Ellie for managing to fulfil her dream of working in both paediatrics and oncology combined. She seemed different, more settled and happier with the work she was doing. As she was currently on an evening shift, which was soon coming to an end, I was killing time until I’d be able to see her. We had agreed, reluctantly on her part, that I’d send my driver to collect her from her shifts, despite her protests of catching a taxi instead. She was precious cargo - hell no, I didn’t have any intention of trusting her with a random driver.
Nina was now in the midst of fighting a lawsuit from Addison - I felt sorry for Lawrence having to deal with yet more drama from his daughter, but she deserved it. She tried to frame me and in doing so, could have ruined my career. I drained my beer. Bitch. She deserved all she had coming to her.
I wandered around outside, feeling a little melancholy and reflecting on my life. In the short few months I had known Ellie, she was beginning to change my outlook on life. For the past few days I’d found myself questioning what the hell I was doing in this world, how was I really contributing to the good of it? Sure, I made people beautiful - I fixed them aesthetically. Ellie wanted to fix people from inside. I dipped my foot at the edge of the pool lightly splashing the warm water. I had never questioned the nature of my work before, it was always a given that I would follow my father’s footsteps into cosmetic surgery. And I can’t deny that I was privileged with the good life that came with it - the money, parties, fast cars, fame and …the women. All my life, I’ve had women chasing me – women of all types, I could have my pick. They took whatever they wanted from life - from me. And I’ve never questioned any of this shit. Until now. Until Ellie.
I stepped away from the pool. I was thirty-four years old, too fucking early to have some mid-life crisis. Maybe being good to Ellie, who was doing the real shit was enough. I just had to make sure that I was good enough for her.
Ellie
“Hey Ellie…sorry, I know you’re about to head home, but we’re really stretched tonight with the new patients. Could you help clean up Tyler, please? I’ve got to be in like three places, right now!”
I put down my pen, finishing off my notes. Mentally and physically exhausted, I was so looking forward to going home and relaxing my aching body in a hot bath. Preferably, with Julien. But the kids needed us and this was more important.
“Of course, Tammy. Has he been sick again?”
“Yes, poor little guy. The chemo really took it out of him today. Thanks, Ellie, really appreciate it!” She reached around me to grab some notes and then swiftly walked back in the direction she came from.
I took a fresh gown from the linen cupboard and walked into the small room to clean up. Twenty minutes later, six year old Tyler was settled and freshened up, almost asleep. It broke my heart to see these kids suffer the side effects from their treatment, something I was still very much struggling with. As I finished washing my hands, I distinctly heard a muffled cry coming from next door, which I knew was Olivia Hunter, a very sweet little four year old. Quickly drying my hands, I checked to see Tyler was asleep, adjusted his covers and then moved next door.
“Livvy? Why are you crying, sweetie? Is anything hurting?”
The little girl, with her tiny and frail body, had her face turned towards the wall, clutching Mr Tiny, her beloved brown bear. Upon hearing my voice, she turned over, her big blue eyes red-rimmed and distressed. She shook her head and continued to cry.
I walked over to her bed, anxiously looking for any obvious signs of discomfort, but she seemed quite comfortable. Gently, I sat down on her bed, grabbed a tissue and began wiping away her tears. Olivia had been diagnosed with stage three non-Hodgkins disease and was going through some very invasive treatment.
“What’s wrong, Livvy? Talk to me, darling?”
The little girl let out a hiccup as she attempted to get her breathing under control. I waited patiently, gripping her little hand until she was ready to talk.
“I’m not a princess anymore.”
“Of course you’re a princess, Livvy. Why do you say that?”
“My daddy calls me his princess but I’m sad that he’s not going to love me anymore.” Her eyes welled up with fresh tears and I quickly swallowed my own lump in my throat. I stroked her shoulder, trying to give her some comfort.
“Of course your mummy and daddy love you, sweetie!”
“No they don’t, nurse Ellie. Princesses have long beautiful hair and my hair is all gone. How will my daddy still love me? He said I was his princess but I can’t be one now!” She began sobbing and I quickly picked her little body up, mindful of her wires and gathered her into my arms.
“Oh, Livvy. It doesn’t matter if you don’t have any hair now, sweetie. It will grow back once your treatment has finished, okay? And you’re always going to be a princess - with or without hair, darling.” I slowly rocked her against me whilst she calmed down, my heart breaking for this little girl. She looked up at me with big sorrowful eyes.
“You have such pretty hair, Ellie. Will mine grow back like yours?”
I smiled at her tenderly. “I think your hair is going to be even prettier than mine when it grows back.”
“Really, you think so?”
I nodded confidently. “Definitely. And you know what else? It’s all going to be all brand new.” I tugged at my hair, grimacing. “You don’t want old, horrible hair like mine!”
I finally managed a smile from her, seemingly content with my explanation. I held her for a few more minutes, while we talked about everything and nothing until I saw her eyes grow heavy with sleep.
“Ellie?”
“Yes, Livvy?”
“How come you talk all funny?”
I laughed. “You think I talk funny? I think you talk funny!” She giggled as I gave her a little tickle on her tummy. “Okay, missy, time for bed now, sweetie.” I gently laid her back down and drew the covers over her.
“Ellie, please can you stay and hold my hand until I’m asleep?”
“I’m right here, darling.” I held her hand, whilst dragging the chair over to her bed.
“Can you sing me a song?”
I stopped short, overcome with emotion for this simple and innocent request as visions of my mother, singing to me as a child, quickly flashed through my mind. Quickly blinking, I nodded and began to softly sing her a lullaby. A short while later, she was fast asleep.
Quietly stepping out of her room, I glanced at my watch, noticing that I had been with the kids for almost an hour longer from when my shift ended. Quickly rushing to the bathroom, I splashed some water on my face, whilst trying to get my emotions under control. It was tough working here, an entire different world to what I had come from at B&F. The doctors and nurses here were incredible with the care they took towards these kids. I wondered if Julien knew what it was like to work in such an emotionally challenging environment - in comparison his life was relatively easy.
Horrified, I stopped myself short at my train of thoughts. How could I pass judgement on Julien’s work?! It was completely different to this, but it didn’t mean it was any less important. I couldn’t believe I was so dismissive of his line of work and instantly felt terrible at criticising him, even just in my head.
I grabbed my bag and headed for the exit, so looking forward to the weekend with Julien. We hadn’t seen much of each other lately and I couldn’t wait to spending some uninterrupted quality time together.
I was looking forward to a leisurely lie-in the following morning but when I turned over in bed, I noted Julien’s side was empty. Squinting at the bedside table, the clock read eight o’clock - I wondered where he was at this time of morning, hoping he hadn’t been paged for an emergency at the clinic.
As if reading my thoughts, he entered into the bedroom, fully dressed and holding a tray. The smell of coffee hit my nostrils.
“Ump….smells good. Is that breakfast?”
He came over to me, gently placing the tray on the bed.
“Good morning, sleepyhead. Here, eat up, I have a surprise for you!” He grinned, all boyish charm in full display, as I self-consciously patted down my bed-head.
“A surprise? Any clues?” I smiled, as I picked up the cup of coffee and took a small sip. I loved surprises!
“Nope! That would ruin all the fun.” He leant forward and gave me a peck on the lips.
“Okay, oh gosh, I’m so excited! I’ll be ready in twenty.” I began to quickly eat my eggs. Although limited in his culinary skills, Julien made a mean egg-white scrambled omelette.
Julien raised an eyebrow, somewhat shocked from his expression. “You can be showered and ready in twenty minutes?”
“Er…yeah? Unless I need to be all fancy or something? Will jeans and trainers do?”
He grinned. “I love your English accent. Jeans and sneakers are perfect.”
A little while later, we were in the car, on our way to the unknown destination. I snuck a sideways glance at Julien, who seemed to look more handsome by the day. Wearing a dark green polo and stylish designer sunglasses, I was glad I couldn’t see his eyes, because that would make coherent thinking even more difficult, especially with the sexy thoughts I had running through my mind.
“Are you sure you’re not going to tell me anything?”
“You’ll soon see,” he said, the corner of his mouth lifting into a smile. “I promise, Ellie, we’ll have a lot of fun.”
Soon we were leaving the city behind and as I looked out of the window a small feeling of disappointment settled over me. The vast, perfectly cut fairways of a golf course lay on our left.
“I’m not sure about your standards for fun, Mr Berthou.”
“We’re not going golfing, Ellie,” he chuckled at my dismayed expression.
A few minutes later, we turned down a narrow street and the sight of two dozen small aircrafts in the distance temporarily distracted me.
“We’re here!”
I had flown a few times before but never from a private airport.
“We’re flying?” I asked, stunned, as he parked in front of the wire fence that marked the ending of the airport.
Cutting the engine, he removed his sunglasses. “Yeah. Come on.” He got out of the car and I hesitated for almost a minute before pushing the door open and stepping into the dry air with an uneasy feeling.
“Are you okay, Ellie? You look a bit pale.” Julien came around, shutting my door and looking at me with genuine concern.
“Er…I’m not sure I want to go up in a small aircraft. I think I’ll be sick.”
“You won’t get sick, I promise.” He wrapped one arm around my waist and silenced my protest with a kiss. Soft. Sweet. Short. Enough to deepen my craving for him.
“Let’s go.” He grabbed my hand and we started walking towards the only gate in the fence.
As we slid between the aircrafts, I found ourselves standing outside a plane, the only one with a ladder attached to it.
“Julien, I’m not sure this is a good idea.” I eyed the small aircraft as a tight knot formed in my throat.
“It’s okay, Ellie. It’s not as small as it looks.” He seemed amused.
“I-“
“I’ll look after you if you get sick. There’s a doctor on board, you know.” He winked, trying to erase some of my fear.
I gave him a watery smile, took a deep breath and started to climb the ladder. As soon as I was inside, I realised that the plane wasn’t that small, with twice as many seats as I thought - six sleek leather chairs arranged in three rows of two.
Julien gestured to the front row, whilst he greeted the captain and I quickly chose the window seat, buckling my seatbelt the instant I sat down. Julien watched me, smiling, as he continued his conversation. A couple of minutes later, he took his seat next to me, buckling up as well.
“Where are we going?” I asked, realising he still hadn’t told me.
I stared at Julien, who was wearing an ear-to-ear grin. “We’re skydiving,” he said, just as the plane started to move.
“What?!” I asked blankly. “What do you mean we?”
The plane was now working up speed as it roared down the runway, the sounds a whole lot louder than what I’d been used to before. I felt the wheels retract and I sank back in my seat, as it took flight, closing my eyes, hoping that the contents of my breakfast in my stomach would stay put.
“It will be fun, Ellie.” Julien shouted over the noise and I shook my head, my lips pursed.
“No way. You’re mad if you think I’m going to jump.” I dug my nails into the leather seat. “Surely you need hours of training and special equipment and I don’t know, maybe even a licence or something. No way, I’m not right for this.” My desperation seemed to have the opposite effect, because he grinned wider than before. “Plus you need to be really brave.”
Julien leaned in, lifting my chin with his fingers. “You are brave, Ellie,” his tone was low and seductive, “more than you realise.”
Soon the plane stopped ascending and I turned to Julien. “Why are we stopping?”
“We’re only jumping from eight thousand feet today.” He clarified. “So what do you say?”
“Only eight thousand feet?” I shook my head in defeat. “I don’t think I have a choice.”
He looked at me intently, without one hint of his warm smile. “Ellie, you always have a choice.”
And maybe because I couldn’t bear to disappoint him or most probably because I’d truly lost my mind, I found myself answering, “Okay, I’ll do it.”
His face broke into a huge smile. “That’s my girl. You’ll love it.” He unbuckled his seatbelt and got up. “I’ll just grab the equipment.”
Five minutes later, I found out that the equipment consisted of a heavy jumpsuit that covered my entire body, a helmet and goggles.
“Don’t I need a parachute?”
“Well, for that you really do need a lot of training, to be able to steer properly. You’ll jump with me, so you won’t need one. How do you feel?”
“Hot. I feel like I should be going skiing instead.”
He grinned. “You look beautiful. Don’t worry about anything, okay? I’ve been doing this for years.”
He stood behind me and set up the belts and straps that connected us together. There was a metal bar just above the door that went all the way to the front seats. Julien and I positioned ourselves next to the door and grabbed the bar.
“Ready to jump?”
I felt the lightness in my chest spread to my stomach and I barely nodded before the door flung open and Julien pushed me forward. In the blissful second between the first rush of cold air and my feet leaving the floor of the plane, I recognised what the feeling of lightness meant.
Adrenaline. Pure and complete freedom.
There was nothing except the cold wind around me, filling my lungs…my mind…taking over my entire body in the free fall. I felt as light as a feather and as quick as a bullet as I hurtled down, faster and faster, the clouds playing games with me as they swirled around me, appearing and then disappearing once again. Suddenly, I felt a violent pull, which ended the incredible velocity and I realised that Julien pulled the parachute - and we began our smooth descent. I gasped as I drew in my first deep breath, blinking the water away from my eyes.
“You okay, baby?” He screamed in my ear.
“YES!” I screamed back, my heart racing so frantically I was afraid it may jump out of my chest. I took in the breath-taking scenery and beauty around me - the unending ocean which was reflecting a silver light from the bright sun, even the mundane city below us - from the highways to the golf club - which looked almost perfect from up here. As we descended lower and lower, I found myself wishing we could go even slower, hating for this wonderful experience to draw to an end.
We landed faster than I’d hoped we would, in a large patch of worn grass right next to the airport. Julien quickly unfastened our connecting belts and straps. The first few steps on solid ground felt like I was floating.
“How was it?” Julien called as he freed himself from the parachute and unzipped his suit a little. We pulled off our helmets and threw them onto the grass.
My face must have been a picture of ecstasy. “I LOVED it!” I couldn’t help myself from jumping up and down. “Can we go again?”
“Not today,” he said grinning wildly, “but I promise I’ll take you again soon.”
“Higher next time?”
“Baby, I’ll always like to take you higher each time.”
I blushed violently because I knew he wasn’t referring to skydiving. He grabbed my waist, pulling me into an embrace. Entangling his fingers into my hair, he pulled me against him, kissing me. Passionately, fiercely and almost desperately. It left me breathless and wanting more, cursing the suit and our location.
“You’re a greedy little thing aren’t you, Miss Hartley,” he whispered, biting my lip. I felt myself weaken at his hot breath against my lips, every inch of my body craving contact with his.
He put an arm around my waist and kissed my temple. “Come on, let’s gets out of here.”
“Yes, please, Doctor.” I reached up to peck my wonderful man.
We spent a leisurely lunch together eating al fresco at some ridiculously expensive restaurant where the food was utterly sublime.
“You really do spoil me too much, Julien,” I smiled lazily, appreciating the crisp white wine, which perfectly complimented my salmon.
His gaze darkened as he watched my lips. “You are my light, Ellie. Nothing is too much.”
I placed my glass down, our eyes locking together. Could I detect something more behind his gaze? My heart raced at the possibilities and I had to look away before I blurted out the words myself. I was in love with Julien, there was no denying it - I just wasn’t sure if he felt the same depth of feelings I was experiencing - or if I was just his current phase. The latter thought made me nauseous so I quickly dismissed it from of my mind. Focus on the present, Ellie.
I must have dozed asleep in the car on the way home and was woken up with kisses.
“We’re home, baby.”
I slowly opened my eyes, blinking at the bright sun as I made my way out of the car. Wow, the wine must have got to me.
Julien took my hand as I followed him inside, heading towards the den. I sat down on the sofa and watched as Julien knelt before me, and dragging his hands across my skin, he pulled down my jeans. My breath hitched as my legs nudged open, my bare knees bouncing against the hard muscle of his thighs.
He pulled me farther, until my back was flat against the sofa, with my bum hanging off, his hands soft, probing, lifting my legs higher and peeling off my underwear. And then I was bare before him, his hands pushing up my top, expertly unclasping my bra single-handedly, until my breasts were also exposed. He stilled as he raked his eyes over me.
“Fucking perfect,” he breathed. He ran his hands lightly down by body, from breast to thigh, back and forth, just skimming my skin, enough to make me arch into his touch and beg for more with my eyes. I waited, breathing heavily and parted my legs, yearning for his touch. His eyes dropped, focussing on the place between my legs and groaned deeply, his fingertips dragging lower and running softly over the lips of my sex. I moaned softly.
“So perfect,” he repeated, his fingers brushing up and down over that spot, not pushing, not spreading, just a gentle caress which had me lifting hips, wanting and needing more. He pushed a finger inside me and I jumped from the contact.
“God…”, the groan tumbled from his mouth as he lowered his lips to mine, stretching his body forward, the hard muscles of his chest pressing against mine as he kissed me. I wrapped my legs around him, pinning his hands to me, the gentle movement of his finger causing my breath to catch as I stilled my mouth against his.
“Oh God, Julien. Oh my, god, yes!”
“I love you, Ellie,” he whispered as he claimed my lips again, this time hard and possessively. The sensation of his fingers coupled with the words I longed to hear, had my back coming off the leather and my breath arrested as he touched some spot that made my world go crazy.
“I love you too, Julien…” I kissed him again and then his mouth left mine, dropping to my neck, a hand pulling my legs apart as he moved down my body, his mouth soft on my skin, a delicious journey down as his finger continued its perfect tease inside my body.
I couldn’t keep my eyes open, but I wanted to. Wanted to see the look of intensity on his face that stole over him as he watched me. The heavy lids and panting of his breath as his fingers continued its brush against and inside me, had me bucking against him.
I arched against his hand, humping it shamelessly as my body exploded around his finger, waves upon waves of pleasure as I called out his name, my world turning into stars and my body into a constellation. And then, before I fell from the sky, before I flicked open my eyes, he shoved himself inside me and I lost it again.
Hard, fast. He pumped into me as if he were punishing me but the words spilling out were nothing but love. Bending over me, he dug his hands into my hips and held me tightly in place. Pounding away, with my name repeating on his tongue, the urgency in his movements carried me higher, spurring my pleasure. I wrapped my legs around him, dug my feet into his back and raked my nails across his skin.
He came intently, one hand cradling my neck and the other squeezing my bum, pulling me tighter as if he would never get enough - be deep enough - of me.
He thrusted in fully, moaning my name and shuddered through the final waves of his orgasm.
“I love you so much baby,” he whispered, as he gently pulled out, discarding the condom, which I hadn’t even noticed him putting on. Lifting me, his hands tucked underneath my body, he spun me until he was below and I was on top, stretched out over his body, my chest tight against his chest, the quick beating of our hearts off sync.
“I love you, darling.”
Outside, the sun blazed and the wind gently swayed through the palms. Nothing in my world could be more perfect.
Julien
Life was back to normal following an awesome weekend with Ellie. I felt more close to her than to anyone else I’d ever felt to before. My confession of love, rolling off my tongue took me by surprise; clearly my heart processed it before my mind did. Still, it felt good to say it - I hadn’t uttered those words to any woman in over a decade - even if I had before - it was nothing compared to what I was feeling now.
“You still with me, dude?”
I looked up, blinking and smirked at Pieter’s remark. It was after work and we were having a beer together in my office. Catching up and that kind of shit.
“Yeah, sorry. Just thinking.”
“Everything good now?”
Yeah, everything was great. After weeks of being tangled up in the lawsuit and ex-drama, it was good to be back to the regular job, back in my professional setting despite my recent questioning of its purpose.
“All, good, my friend. I’m relieved it’s all over.” I took a sip of my beer. “I hear Nina’s been served. I feel sorry for the crap that Lawrence has to deal with, though.”
“I know, it must suck to have such a bitch for a daughter.” I watched as he peeled the label of his bottle.
“So, Pieter… What about you? Seeing anyone right now?”
He laughed. “What me? Nah - too focused on work at the moment. How’s things going with Ellie?”
I smiled at the mention of her name.
“Oh shit, man, you look like you’re whipped!” Pieter burst out laughing at my goofy smile.
“Fuck, yeah, I’m whipped and proud of it!” We clinked bottles together, laughing. “Seriously, she’s great. I’m very impressed with how she’s taken to her new role. She’s an amazing nurse, but slightly struggling at the moment. She needs to learn how to emotionally detach from her patients.
”I agree, from what I saw, she’s gonna go places. She’s working in oncology, right? With kids? Must be tough seeing that every day.”
“Yeah, she’s been in tears twice this week over a couple of kids. I hope she’ll be able to separate herself soon.”
Pieter was thoughtful for a moment as we sipped our beers in silence.
“So, are you being good to her, Julien? Are you being good for her?”
I placed my bottle down, frowning at his direct question.
“I don’t know, man. She says I am, but I’m not sure. I’m trying, you know?”
“You’re alright, Julien,” he smirked, “don’t be so hard on yourself.”
I ran a hand through my hair. “I don’t know - her work and what she wants is so different to our line of work. It’s almost like I feel I’m not good enough for her.”
Shit. I’d never confided with a friend before on an emotional level - all that feelings talk was not for me. But I astonished myself by revelling in the notion that it actually felt good.
“Maybe you should talk to her. It’s clear that it’s bothering you. Sure, our speciality is different, but we’re also doing our best to help patients too.”
I agreed. I’d have to make certain, outside of the afterglow, that we were both on the same page. I’d talk to her soon.
I lit the final candle, scrutinising my table display. My maid, Elena, had earlier prepared our meal and all that was left was to set the table, which I’d told her I wanted to do myself. Fuck, I was turning into some hopeless romantic sap! I grinned at the thought of the transformation I was experiencing, sprinkling a few rose petals onto the crisp white tablecloth. The wine was nicely chilling and a quick glance at my watch told me that Ellie would be home any minute.
I had just grabbed the tablet to select some music, when the doorbell rang. Not expecting anyone and Ellie had her own key, I wondered who would be visiting at seven this evening. A few strides later, I pulled open my door.
“Hi, Julien.”
I sucked in a breath, frowning. “Addison. What are you doing here?”
“Please, Julien, can we talk? It’s really important.” She looked at me closely, her eyes silently pleading.
Sighing, I pulled open my door, gesturing with my arm. “Fine, come in. You have two minutes.”
She moved past me, and I caught a whiff of her perfume. In the old days, the scent used to turn me on - now, it did nothing for me. She tucked her hands into the pockets of her fitted coat, her high heels clicking on my tiled floor as she made her way inside. No doubt, she was extremely attractive and objectively I could see why guys would want a piece of her ass, but not for me. She was far too skinny and typical LA - all tits and bleached teeth.
“What can I do for you, Addison?” My voice was tight, conscious that Ellie would be here any minute.
She raised her nose to the air, sniffing. “Mmmmmm…something smells good.”
I stood there with my arms crossed.
“Okay, well, I just kind of wanted your opinion.” She batted her eyelashes and started undoing her coat buttons.
“What are you doing, Addison?” I watched, as the last button was released and she pulled it open, shrugging it off her shoulders and dropping it to the floor. Clearly she had forgotten her clothes, standing there in just her bra and thong. Placing her hands on her breasts, she squeezed them together, slowly licking her lips as she eyed my reaction.
“I just had some work done to my breasts…I wonder what you think?”
What I thought? I thought they looked okay from here, but I had zero intention of performing a full exam. Besides, these days I was into au natural - permanently.
“Addison, what the hell are you doing? Put your clothes back on!”
She ignored my request and instead stepped closer to me. “Come on Julien…I want you. I’m pretty sure it’s mutual…” She raised an eyebrow, her hand reaching out to grab my crotch.
At that very moment, the door swung open and Ellie stood there, her eyes widening in horror at the scene before her. Fuck.
Addison dropped her hand and shot Ellie a look, her mouth curving into a sly smile.
“Julien?” Ellie’s voice was cool and distant as she regained her composure.
“Ellie, it’s not what you think. Addison here was just leaving.” My voice was hard as I pinned Addison with a look of hatred.
Slowly, Addison turned around and provocatively bending over with her ass on full display, she slowly picked up her coat, taking her time to put it back on. Ellie’s face was unreadable as she watched, wordlessly.
“Ellie? That your name?” Addison walked over to the door, throwing me a wink over her shoulder. “Sweetie, you seriously don’t think Julien would settle for someone like you, do you? I mean, I hate to break it to you, but if you walked in a few minutes later, you could have caught some serious action between us.” She smirked at Ellie, cocking her head to the side as she looked her up and down. “I can see why he likes you…hmmmm…..maybe I’d even let you join in.”
Ellie’s eyes narrowed. “I very much doubt that, Addison. Now get the fuck out of our house!”
Addison raised an eyebrow as I moved to stand protectively by Ellie.
“Bye, Julien…for now.” She raised her hand in a mock salute and slammed the door behind her.
Ellie visibly paled and dropped her bag, blinking rapidly. Oh shit.
“Baby, she just turned up. I swear, she took me by surprise.”
Ellie nodded slightly and pushed past me. I followed her through the house, into the kitchen and watched whilst she poured herself a glass of water. A few moments later, she finally looked at me, her eyes flashing.
“It’s always going to be like this, isn’t it, Julien? I’m never going to be good enough for you!”
“Whoa. Wait just a moment, Ellie. What are you talking about?” Shocked, I approached her but stopped in my tracks when she backed away, noticing her eyes filling with tears.
“It’s true, Julien! Look at us playing house together, living in this bubble! Look at your exes - how can I ever compare to them? I’m just plain! Look at me!”
Her voice had risen, as she paced the kitchen. I’d never seen Ellie this worked up before.
“I think you need to calm down, Ellie.” I spoke softly, hoping she would take it down a notch or two.
“Calm down?! Julien, we’re from completely different worlds! I can’t pretend to be someone I’m not. I can’t have your flashy world and exes continually thrown in my face. It’s not me!” Her face crumpled and she began to sob. I immediately closed the gap, wrapping my arms around her, soothing her. Slightly shocked by her outburst, I hadn’t realised how clearly overwhelmed she was feeling with everything. I thought things were great between us.
“I’m sorry you’re feeling this way, Ellie. But please don’t be insecure, baby. I choose you, the way you are. I don’t give a fuck about my exes. I’ve told you before, they’re my past. You need to believe me, baby.”
She sniffed against my chest as she struggled to get her breathing under control.
“It’s not just your exes, Julien. Our careers …everything…we’re so different.”
I pulled away from her slowly. “I know we’re on different paths, Ellie. I don’t care where you came from. I just want to support you as you continue to do your good work in the world. I want us, Ellie.”
Unexpectedly, she shoved me away. “I don’t know, Julien. I don’t know how I can share my stress - my world - with you. I mean look, your work is literally superficial! Does it actually mean anything?” Her eyes widened with shock at her words, and she flung her hand to cover her mouth.
She thought I was superficial? That my work didn’t matter? What the fuck?! This time I was the one to back away, shaking my head, pissed at her words.
“Julien! Please! I - “
“Save it, Ellie. I’ve heard enough.”
I grabbed my jacket and strode out of the kitchen.
“Wait! Julien, please! I don’t know why I said that. Wait! Where are you going?!”
“Out. I need some air.”
I pulled open the front door and a few moments later, revved up the engine to the 911. I needed a beer.
Ellie
Oh God, I felt so bad. Why did I have to be so irrational two nights ago? Our first fight, and since then, things were very strained between us. Julien was at the clinic all hours catching up with re-scheduled operations so I didn’t have the chance to fully apologise to him. Tonight after work, though, I’d make things right. I’d checked in with Penny and I knew that he was due to be finishing on time this evening so I had gone and bought ingredients for a home cooked supper. Thankfully, I had a few hours owed to me so I planned on finishing up slightly earlier myself. I smiled as I thought of my new corset and lace thong, together with the suspenders and stockings that I’d bought yesterday. They cost my half my monthly salary but I felt amazing when I tried them on, so it was completely worth the splurge. I hoped Julien would appreciate them too…and a nice romantic evening together. We needed to clear the air. I still couldn’t believe the selfish words that had slipped off my tongue. Who was I, a recent graduate, telling a world-respected surgeon that his work didn’t mean anything on a deeper level? Cringing at my outburst, I could only hope he would forgive me.
It was still early morning and I decided to quickly check in with my dad before I started work for the day. Making myself comfortable on the sofa, I dialled his number.
“Hi dad!” I smiled as I heard his voice.
“Ellie! Hello love, aren’t you supposed to be at work?”
I laughed at his direct tone. “I’ve got a few minutes to spare, thought I’d say hello. What are you up to, daddy?”
“Oh you know, this and that, darling. Work is keeping me busy…can’t seem to leave my studio these days.”
“Are you looking after yourself? Please tell me you’re eating again after your last bout of illness.”
“I’m fine, sweetheart. And yes, I’m eating. Now, tell me how are things with you? Settling into your new job okay?”
I smiled, thinking of my wonderful kids at the hospital. “Work is great, dad. It’s tough, things can go crazy at a drop of hat, but I’m really enjoying the challenge.”
“That’s my girl. I can hear it in your voice - you seem a lot more content. And how is Julien treating you?”
“Julien…he’s been amazing, dad.” I felt a warm glow of happiness as I pictured his face.
“You sound very happy, Ellie.”
I sighed. “I am, dad. I love him.”
He was silent. “Dad, are you still there?”
“I’m here, Ellie. You’re old man is just a little emotional hearing you say that - I wish your mother was here to have this conversation with you.” He suddenly seemed choked up and I felt myself tearing up as well. I’d have loved for my mother to have met Julien.
“It’s okay, daddy. You’re doing a great job hearing me out…”
“But? Am I right in thinking there’s a but in there?”
I twirled a strand of hair around my finger as I reflected on his question. He was so astute, knew me so well.
“Yeah, there’s a small but, dad. I guess I’m just worried about how different our lives are - how different my background is to his. Even now, with our current work - we’re in separate worlds. I don’t know if there is a real future for us.”
“Does he love you too?”
I nodded, aware that he couldn’t see me. “Yes, daddy. He says he does.”
“Well, Ellie, all I can say that if you both love each other, then you have to support each other, too. Life can throw us a lot of curveballs, but if your foundation together is strong, then nothing will shake you. You need to decide if this is what you want - I’m proud of you regardless. Besides, you’re still so young, Ellie. You have all the time in the world to learn, both in your career and relationships.”
“Thank you, daddy. How did I get so lucky to have such a wise old man in my life?”
“Hey! Easy on the old, there!”
I laughed along with him. “Okay dad, gotta go. Love you!”
“Love you too, darling.”
I hung up and released a big breath. I’d been so stressed lately, but I was hoping that maybe things would smooth out as I got more used to the job and environment. It was still taking me some time getting accustomed to being with Julien too, but I knew I had to stop worrying about all the consequences. I’d wait and see - no use panicking about things that hadn’t yet happened.
Later that evening, applying some pink gloss to my lips, I shook out my hair and stood back from the mirror, scrutinising my body. A quick glance at the clock told me he’d be home any second so I quickly slipped on my black patent heels and made my way downstairs. I’d already prepped the den with some candles. Next, grabbing the tablet, I selected some soft and soulful music. The mood was perfect. Just as I thought, I heard the front door open and shut a few moments later.
“Ellie, are you here?”
“Yes, I’m in the den!” I heard his footsteps approaching and the next minute he was standing in front of me, carrying a huge bunch of roses.
I smiled at him seductively and the roses slipped out of his hand.
“Hello, darling. Welcome home.”
“Ellie…” His voice was a groan, thick with desire whilst keeping his intense blue eyes on mine.
My heart hammered in my chest, as I slowly walked towards him. “I’m sorry, Julien. I’m so sorry.” I reached up to kiss him and his arms immediately encircled me, kissing me passionately. I pulled away, noting the surprise in his eyes.
“Take off your trousers.”
“What?” He seemed confused at my command.
“Off. Take them off.”
Without a sound, he undid his belt buckle and pushed his pants down his hips. I immediately noticed the growing bulge. Smiling, I pulled down his boxers, lifting his cock free from the material, letting it rest against his belly. Still holding me close, he adjusted himself, freeing his balls so that all of him was exposed. Everything about him was so intensely male and perfect, it was hard not to react.
My body pulsed with electric heat as feelings of desire and lust coursed through me.
Slipping down to my knees, he watched me expectantly as I lifted his heavy cock away from where it rested against his tight abdominal muscles and flicked my tongue out to taste the tip of him. Releasing a small groan of satisfaction, he tightened his grip against the back of my neck, urging me closer.
Curling my fist around the base of him, I worked my tongue up and down his length, finding my rhythm and sliding my hand up and down - I’d never be able to fit all of him in my mouth, so using my hands, too, was a necessity.
A softly murmured curse urged me on as my free hand reached beneath to gently cup and massage his balls. A warm drop of fluid escaped him and I swiped my tongue against the tip, capturing the bead of salty fluid and swallowing it down.
Keeping my suction going, I eased open my jaw to take in as much of him that I could fit into my mouth. Using both hands, I firmly stroked and slid up his generous length.
“Oh, fuck,” Julien growled. “That’s amazing, baby. Just like that.” His deep voiced rumbled in his chest and warmth and moisture flooded my panties as I committed myself to fully sucking, licking and stroking to the best of my ability.
His hand tightened in my hair, causing my scalp to tingle and then abruptly he pulled away, taking his cock in his hand and stroking it in short, uneven strokes. My core clenched at the sight of him.
“I’m gonna come…” he moaned.
I pulled his hands away, and took his cock, placing it back on my tongue, and then continued to suck.
“Oh shit, baby,” he growled, “that feels so fucking good.” His eyes were dark with lust as he watched my mouth working up and down his length. “Your mouth looks so pretty on my cock.”
Seconds later, he groaned deeply as warm drops of semen spurted onto my tongue, his hips jerking wildly in release. I swallowed and sat back on my heels, smiling proudly at him. It felt amazing to watch such a powerful man come apart for me like that. My man. He pulled me up a few moments later to my full height.
“Dayum, Ellie. Thank you. That was incredible.”
I groaned in pleasure as the warm spray hit my body, waking up my body and soothing my muscles. Afterwards, I stepped out into the steam-filled bathroom and wrapped myself up in huge fluffy towel. Combing through my hair, I walked back into the bedroom, just in time to see Julien stripping off from his workout. Drawn to his rock hard abs, my eyes lowered further down and I involuntarily licked my lips remembering the feel of his cock in my mouth last night.
“Hey, baby, my eyes are up here.”
I snapped my eyes up into his smirking face and quickly felt the heat spread across my face, caught out staring at him.
Before I could respond, my mobile phone began ringing and I padded across the thick carpet to the beside table.
“Oh gosh, hope everything is okay on the ward.” I muttered to myself. However, I didn’t recognise the number as the display suggested an international call. I tapped the answer button.
“Hello?”
“Hello, am I speaking with Eleanor Hartley?”
“Yes, speaking?” The formal tone of the caller had my heart starting to pound. And I sank down onto the edge of the bed. Julien must have noticed my worried expression and was immediately beside me, a questioning look in his eyes. I shrugged my shoulders.
“Miss Hartley, this is Sister Walker calling from St. Thomas’ Hospital in London.”
“How can I help you, Sister?”
“I’m really sorry to inform you, Eleanor, but your father, James Hartley, has suffered a heart attack. He is alive but is currently in surgery.”
Heart attack. Heart attack. Heart attack. Daddy. My world stopped around me as I felt the phone slipping away from my hand.
“Miss Hartley, Eleanor, are you there?”
The vague sound of the nurse could be heard but my body had frozen. All I could see was my daddy’s face, smiling, happy, memories flashing before my eyes - teaching me how to ride my bike, buying my first car, my graduation, how proud he was of me being out here, always wanting the best for me. This had to be a mistake. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear Julien’s voice talking, something about making flight arrangements, but it felt like I was underwater because the sounds were muffled and I couldn’t really hear.
Then everything around me began to spin. First my mum…now my dad. Not my dad, too. Please God, please don’t take my daddy from me. The spinning got faster and my eyelids flew back into my head.
And then darkness.
Ellie
Gripping my father’s hand, I sat by his bedside, watching him intently. My eyes kept flicking over to his monitoring machines, the reassuring sounds of the beeping telling me that he was okay. That he was alive.
The past few days seemed to have flown past in a blur. Thank God, Julien was there to take over, get our flights booked, organise my absence of leave, speak with the UK doctors. I merely retreated into the safety of his strength, overcome with shock and fearing the worst.
He had returned back to LA early yesterday morning and I immediately felt his absence. Pushing my feelings to the side, I had to concentrate on getting my dad better. Having pulled through his bypass operation, dad was conscious but extremely weak - I had barely left his side, only eating, or rather picking at my food upon Julien’s insistence.
Looking out of the window into the grey overcast sky of London, I thought of the past few days, the way Julien had handled everything. He was my rock but with the distance that now separated us, I felt like my LA bubble had burst. Like Cinderella, my time at the ball had ceased.
“Ellie, you can take a walk or something if you like? We’re all here, so you needn’t worry.” Nurse Jackie popped her head into the room, smiling kindly at me. “You haven’t moved for hours. Why don’t you take a break? We’ll phone you immediately if there are any changes.”
I glanced at my dad, at the monitors. He seemed comfortable enough, in a deep sleep. Maybe I could slip away for an hour, take a quick shower and perhaps buy some groceries for home. Home. I hadn’t been back home for six months. Julien and I were staying in a local hotel which was walking distance to the hospital, but I had checked out this morning.
“Okay, Jackie, thank you. I think I’ll do just that.” I gently replaced his hand back onto the bed and stretched my arms over my head. I probably looked awful but that was the least of my concerns.
Standing up, I gave my dad a soft kiss on his cheeks, promising him I’d be back soon, and then made my way out of his room.
“He’s going to be okay, Ellie. He’s a real fighter.”
I smiled gratefully at Jackie. She kind of reminded me of Penny in a way with her kind and twinkling eyes.
“I hope so, Jackie. I couldn’t bear to think otherwise.”
We made small talk for a few minutes and then I headed to the lift. A few moments later, I was outside, back in the cool autumn air. A stark contrast to the weather in LA. Shivering, I pulled my light jacket around me and then set of for the nearest supermarket.
Wandering aimlessly through the aisles, my thoughts were a jumbled mess. Looking at the food, the layout of the supermarket, hearing the shop announcement come through the speakers - it suddenly felt like I’d never been away. Beverly Hills almost seemed like another world.
Suddenly my phone began to ring and quickly shuffling through my bag, I glanced at the caller display, checking if it was the hospital.
Julien.
My eyes filled with tears. For whatever reason, I couldn’t bring myself to answer his call, my finger frozen and hovering above the answer button. Choking back a sob, I replaced the phone back into my bag. I wanted him so much, wanted him to be by my side, yet at the same time, I was constantly plagued with doubts about the sustainability of our relationship. I quickly ducked my head as I appeared to be drawing attention from some of the other shoppers who were eyeing me quizzically. Brushing my tears away, I concentrated on my list. I had a list, I just needed to get these items and then I could get out of here. As I walked around the store, a little voice in the back of my head told me that it was over, that the past six months were nothing better than make-believe. I flung the packet of dried pasta in my trolley, wishing I could take out my frustration and swipe clean the entire shelf housing the pasta and bottled sauces!
Focus, Ellie. Get your head together and focus on dad. Leave LA be for the meantime.
Finally making it through the shopping, I hailed a cab, giving directions to my dad’s home. My home. A short while later, we pulled up outside the small three bedroom semi-detached house that I had grown up in. It seemed so different to how I remembered it. Glancing around, I saw the front lawn hadn’t been cut in a while, making its appearance semi-feral. The front of the house, although white a long time ago, had faded considerably and with big cracks across the top, it looked in a sorry state.
Sighing, I paid the driver and dragged the shopping bags to the front door. I still had my key so I fished it out of my purse and entered the house. I took a deep breath. Entering the small kitchen, I noticed the unwashed dinner dishes still left over in the sink but apart from that, it was clean and tidy. Opening the fridge however, was a different matter. I frowned as I saw it was mostly filled with microwaveable meals. There was no fresh fruit or vegetables in sight, something that I’d always kept stocked when I was here. Frowning, I put away the shopping in their rightful homes. Things were going to change around here.
After inspecting the downstairs, which was largely the same as when I left, I made my way upstairs to my old bedroom. It was amazing how quickly spoilt one could be, becoming accustomed to living in a six-thousand-plus square foot mansion. Comparatively, my own eighteen hundred square foot house felt tiny. And dated. I took a quick shower, freshened up and then departed the house to go sit by my dad’s side once again. Hopefully he would be awake now.
Stepping out of the lift, back at the hospital, I almost ran into Jackie.
“Oh! Sorry, Jackie!”
“No problem, Ellie! You look like you’re a million miles away.”
“Is my dad awake?”
She began to walk with me back to his room. “Yes, he’s up. Just finished a light lunch. He’s very cheery!”
My face lit up. “Oh great! I’ll talk to you later, Jackie.”
Pushing open the door, I spotted him, propped up slightly against the pillows. The television was on in the background.
“Hi dad, you’re awake!” I kissed him on the cheeks and gave him a gentle hug.
“Hello, sweetheart. Jackie told me you were popping out for a bit. How’s my favourite girl?”
My eyes pricked with tears. A few days ago, I thought I was losing him…and now we were having a normal conversation. I’d never stop being grateful.
“I’m fine, dad! Don’t you worry about me.” I pulled the armchair over to his side and took his hand, not liking how frail and weak it felt. I blinked rapidly.
“Has Julien gone back?”
My voice caught and I swallowed the lump in my throat, still painfully aware that I’d ignored his call earlier.
“Yes,” I managed to get out, “he flew back yesterday morning. He’s got a lot of patients waiting for him.”
Dad was silent as he looked at me, then spoke after a moments.
“He’s a good chap, Ellie. I’m really grateful for how he got involved with the doctors here on my behalf.”
I looked away, anywhere but at his intent gaze.
“Ellie?”
“Sorry. Yes, I agree, he was great. Very professional.”
I spoke softly, recalling how Julien had taken over, the nurses fawning over him, in awe of meeting the dashing and brilliant surgeon, Julien Berthou. The doctors were also incredibly accommodating to him, showing him nothing but courtesy and professional respect. In fact, some of the junior doctors, having heard that he was in this wing, had even especially came over to shake this hand, a couple even pushy and bold enough to even slip him their resume.
I was so proud of him.
And now he was gone.
“Nurse Jackie said she was joking with him - telling him not to check in on the older ladies in the ward for he stood a chance of giving them a secondary heart attack.”
I snapped my eyes to dad, suddenly giggling. It felt good to laugh - I could picture Julien’s face, how charming he could be to the older patients. My heart began to race.
I missed him so much.
“She’s lovely, isn’t she? I really like Jackie, dad, I’m so pleased that she is overseeing your recovery. Of course, now I’m here, I’ll take over as much as they’ll allow me to.”
“Don’t worry, sweetheart, I’m in good hands here. But tell me something.”
“Of course…what?”
“What’s going on with you and Julien?”
Once again I avoided his eyes, this was not the time. “Nothing, dad, like I said, he’s gone back.” Nonchalantly, I shrugged my shoulders.
“Look at me, Ellie.”
Reluctantly, I dragged my eyes to his and immediately saw two things in his stare - love and concern.
“What aren’t you telling me? I feel terribly enough as it is getting myself into this situation and having you rush back like this.”
“What? Dad, no! Please don’t say that! I love you so much, dad!” I felt the tears build up once again and then all of a sudden everything came crashing own on me. The reality of the situation - I could have lost my dad - and the fact that I had possibly lost the love of my life. I placed my head on the side of the bed and began to sob, unable to control my emotions. It was like a dam had broken, the stress of everything had fully gotten to me.
I heard my dad, hushing me as he stroked my hair, telling me that everything was going to be okay. But was it? I didn’t know anymore.
“Tell me what’s going on with you and Julien.”
I brushed my tears away with my sleeve and eventually sat up. It was no use trying to keep my fears from him - I knew he wouldn’t actually rest until her heard everything - and he needed his rest. So I took a deep steadying breath and began to unburden myself.
“I fear we’re over.”
“Why? Did he say that?”
“No, he didn’t, dad. But If I really think about us, I don’t even know how we even got together in the first place.” I smiled, bitterly. “I mean, we’re from different worlds, dad. And now…we’re separated by thousands of miles, I don’t know if we have enough substance to last.”
“I thought you said you loved him. And is he, also in love with you?”
I nodded silently, lifting my watery eyes to his. “But I don’t know if that, those feelings were just make-believe. He’s so worldly, dad…so much more experienced than I am. I don’t know if I’ll hold enough interest for him.”
Dad sighed. “Ellie, I really don’t know where you have developed this complex that you’re not good enough anymore. If being in LA has done that to you, than I’m jolly well pleased that you’re back home! I won’t stand to hear this nonsense.”
I quickly glanced at the heart monitor, noticing his heart rate had slightly picked up. Shit. I was so selfish doing this.
“I’m sorry dad, please, don’t get so worked up, it’s not good for you. Please, take a sip of water.” I stood up and refilled his cup. He sipped a little and I set the cup back down.
“Talk to him, Ellie. As I said, from what little I’ve seen of him, I liked him. A lot.”
I smiled, not wanting to upset him any further. “I will dad, I promise.” I changed the subject. “Now, shall we see what’s on TV? I haven’t watched any English channels in six months!”
I picked up the remote control and flicked through the programmes until we found something acceptable to watch. I smirked. I hadn’t missed anything whilst away - daytime TV was still rubbish.