“Colt, I don’t want two mommies in my family.” Madison crosses her arms. “I want one mama and one dada!”

I look at the cashier, a girl in her early twenties with her long, bright blue hair half shaved and a large nose ring. She cocks her eyebrow at me accusingly. I hand her my money for the ice cream currently melting down my fingers.

“Thanks.” I smile weakly. “Keep the change.” Holding on to Madison’s hand tightly, I walk over to the park bench where she climbs up beside me. Earlier today she told me she doesn’t want me to carry her anymore because she’s not a baby.

In the past month she’s really been pushing for her independence, insisting that she’s ‘a big girl’ and she can ‘do it herself’ for most things. It started after we went to the church service and she heard Isabella’s father talk about riding a bike. She quickly became obsessed with the idea of riding one herself and was devastated when we explained to her that only big girls can ride a two-wheeler. Since that day Madison has been trying to convince me she’s all grown up.

I cringe as I remember how the meeting with her parents went after the service and the way Isabella sobbed for nights afterward when she thought I was sleeping. I shouldn’t have pushed her so hard. Why did I insist on meeting people who’ve only brought misery to her life?

“Colt! Colt! It’s melting.” Madison’s cries snap me back into the present. Her birthday cake flavored ice cream, topped with sprinkles, is dissolving down over my hand. The bright colors are puddling together on my hand, making a design like one of Madison’s finger paintings. I yank the wad of napkins from my pocket that I had the foresight to swipe at the counter and clean the mess.

“Sorry about that. I wasn’t paying attention.” With the mess cleaned up Madison wastes no time trying to devour as much of the ice cream as she can. “Hey, slow down. You don’t want to give yourself a headache.” I try to save her from brain freeze, but I know it’s only a matter of time with how quickly she is devouring the treat.

She stops for a moment and gets a very serious look on her face. “I okay, Colt.” She shakes her head vigorously. “My head no ache.”

“Okay, sweetheart—I mean Madison.”

She isn’t fond of any pet names or nicknames, insisting I only ever call her Madison.

“What were you talking to me about when we were standing in the line? About having two mommies? Can you tell me what you meant?”

Tilting her head to the side, clouds roll over her little brown eyes. “I don’t want two mommies,” she declares. “I want one mama and one dada.”

“You don’t have two mommies, Madison.”

“Is Isabella my mama? I don’t want Isabella! I want my old mommy back,” she emphasizes each word by shaking the ice cream in her hand, dripping it all down her arm and around the bench.

“Okay, be careful with that, please! Listen, Isabella isn’t your mommy. You only have one mother. But Isabella is the woman I love very much and so, she’s a part of your family. Not your mommy, though, okay?”

She nods solemnly and her little brown curls bounce around her ears. “Colt? Where’s my mama? Did she leave ’cause I was bad?” Her lip quivers at the thought.

“No, Madison. You aren’t bad at all and your mommy didn’t leave. She just needed to go to the doctor to get some help, just like when you get a cold. Everyone needs help sometimes and you’ll see, once she gets better you’ll get to see her again.”

“Just like Doc McStuffins?” She smiles, recalling her favorite children’s show. “Mommy is so much better now!” She sings the words to the show adorably off-key.

“Sort of, yeah. Okay, so are you all done with that cone now?”

“All done!”

I take the soggy remnants of her ice cream from her sticky hand and toss it in the garbage can next to us.

“Good, because I have a big-girl job for you. Do you want to help me go shopping?”

Her eyes light up and she squeals in a pitch that should only be reserved for dog whistles.

“Yeah, I help you!” She slides off the bench and jumps up and down with excitement. It’s amazing how much joy children can find in everyday moments. I can’t remember the last time I was that excited about anything, although I have to admit, this mission is probably the closest I’ve come in a while.

“Great, let’s go then. You ready? It’s a super special place that you can’t touch anything, okay? I need to carry you if you want to go.”

She thinks about it for a moment, but her curiosity wins out over her need to be a big girl this time. “Okay, up, up, up!” She reaches up for my neck, and I walk her halfway down the block to Tiffany & Company. Madison’s eye is immediately drawn to the counters filled with sparkling diamond rings and other jewels. “Ohhh, pretty princess sparkles!”

“Good afternoon, sir. Is there anything I can help you with?” A poised, dark-haired man immediately welcomes me to the jewelry store.

“Yes, please. My little helper here”—I nod to Madison, who is still transfixed by the assortment of jewelry—“and I are looking for a diamond ring.”

“Absolutely, sir. Did you have a specific ring in mind?”

“I do. I’d like to see your princess cut engagement rings, please.”