I should’ve fucked Desire but I can’t fuck Desire. I should’ve fucked Desire but I can’t fuck Desire.
This refrain plays over and over again in my head as I watch Desire dance on stage. She moves like someone out of my best dream ever. She looks like a million bucks.
To be fucking honest, she looks too beautiful to be working here at our seedy club. But I thank the god of whoever sent her here that she is.
I meant it when I told Dante that we had to leave Desire alone. But that doesn’t mean I wish we didn’t have to. She’s the one thing I want and she’s completely off limits. But at least I can watch her undress and dance on stage even if she’s dancing for all the other guys instead of just for me.
Dante and I have so much fucking money. Yet the one thing I want: a risk-free fuck session with Desire, is something that can’t be bought.
I’m so busy watching Desire dance that I don’t see anyone come up beside me until I feel a small hand on my shoulder. I look to my left and see Samantha fucking Meyers.
“What the fuck are you doing here?” I ask her.
“Marino,” she laughs. “Come on. I thought you be glad to see me again.”
She has to know that isn’t fucking true. She’s the last person I want to see again.
She’s batting her eyelashes at me in that flirtatious way she used to have back when she was always able to get anything out of me that she wanted. But this time something feels different.
I look back at the stage and I know that it’s Desire who is making all the difference. Somehow Samantha, once the star performer at The Fun House, pales in comparison to Desire.
I’m sure Samantha’s back because she heard about the new girl. She keeps looking at Desire on stage as if she’s jealous. And I relish every second of it. Now it’s her turn to know what that emotion feels like.
“Let’s get out of here,” she says. “I need to talk in private.”
I know this is code for wanting to get me away from Desire or from anything that she’s jealous about. She only ever wanted me when she thought she couldn’t have me. That much is clear to me now. It’s funny how much clarity can be brought on by time apart— and someone new.
“I’m working,” I tell her, although that’s obvious.
She says, “Let’s go back to our old spot.”
Our old spot was just in her car. She supports a junkie boyfriend— and his junkie habits— by dancing. Her loyalty to this loser meant that we could never go to her house. It’s one of the many reasons I’m glad to be rid of her. I guess I never really did manage to get that far away from my mother and my disastrous upbringing, as long as Dante and I were with Samantha.
I stare at Desire on stage again until suddenly Samantha’s problems don’t seem like mine for the first time ever. It’s as if Desire has helped break the spell that Samantha used to have on me.
Samantha isn’t even trying to hold back her jealousy. She’s never been one to hide her emotions. Rather she allows every feeling she has to prance around until it’s as big of a diva as she is.
“Can we at least go to the VIP room?” She asks, shaking her blonde curly hair at me like a princess.
Samantha is used to getting what she wants. From Dante, from me, from everyone. But I vow to make this the last time I give into her. And it’s only because I don’t want her to cause a scene on Desire’s first day of working at The Fun House.
As I get up and follow Samantha I notice that Dante is shaking his head. I shake mine right back at him. He’s got to let me handle this. It’s about time I dealt with Samantha once and for all.
When we get to the VIP room I sit down on the bench but my legs are still fidgeting. I want to be watching Desire on stage, not cooped up back here with Samantha.
“So what you want?” I ask her, not wishing to waste any time.
“I want to come back here and work again,” she says, with a big fake pout on her lips.
“So you found out the grass really isn’t greener?” I smirk.
I’d already told her she wouldn’t find any better club to work at, any more money, any better deals that we had already given her. We’d promoted her to Club Mom, overseeing all the other girls. She basically ran the entire operation.
But then she’d wanted to buy the club itself, and for a lot less than it’s worth. It became obvious she was just using Dante and me for her own pursuits and that still wasn’t good enough for her.
Our falling out was very messy and she burned everything in her wake when she left.
“I told you not to burn any bridges and you did,” I tell her now`. “You can’t come back here. All the other girls hate you.”
She shrugs, obviously used to the idea of people hating her.
“Plus, we don’t need you,” I continue. “If you haven’t noticed there’s a new girl at the Club.”
She arches her eyebrows at me.
“You ever bother to find out where this new girl came from?”
I glare at her, not wanting to admit that I hadn’t.
“What business is it of yours?” I ask her instead. “I thought you were off to find bigger and better pastures. So why are you still sniffing around this old club after you made it quite clear you were done with it and everything— and everyone— in it?”
“I made a mistake, okay?”
She sits down and puts her head in her hands.
“I miss dancing here. I miss you and Dante.”
Here’s my chance to gloat that everything I knew would happen did. She didn’t know how fucking good she had it with us. But I’m not the gloating type.
“Look, Samantha, you made really good money and you helped us make good money,” I tell her. “What we had was fun while it lasted but it’s over.”
“Nothing’s over,” she says. “I want to come back here and you know I always get what I want.”
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”
“It means I know people who know people. If you don’t let me work here you are going to be sorry.”
“So you’re fucking threatening me?” I explode at her.
I’m glad I didn’t fall for her stupid fucking pity party act. She’s always been a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Or a wolf in no clothes at all.
“No one threatens me at my own club,” I tell her.
“It’s Dante’s club,” she spits back at me.
“It’s both of ours.”
“Everyone knows that you’ve only gotten everything you have in life because of Dante,” she tells me, hitting me where it hurts. “But it doesn’t matter whether it’s yours or his or both of yours. I’ll own this club if you don’t give me my way.”
“You don’t know the first thing about owning a club,” I tell her.
“I know that you’re under investigation by the state and that this place is full of code violations to say the least.”
Her eyes are piercing through me like angry daggers. I used to let her get to me way too much, but that was then. This is fucking now.
“Get out of here,” I tell her. “I’m about to have a private dance from someone who took your place and is much better for this club and for me and for Dante than you ever were.”
She laughs but she looks annoyed. I can tell I’m getting to her. Good.
“You’re going to let that new girl come back here and give you a dance in the middle of the busiest part of the night?” she says.
I can tell I hit her right back where it hurts. Her job was to dance out there on stage for other men during prime time, no matter what kind of a relationship Dante and I had with her behind the scenes. Her job was to make us money.
I never used to let Samantha get off the stage no matter what kind of a night she was having and even when she wanted some private time with me or Dante. So that’s exactly what I’m going to do with Desire.
Because it’s what I want to do. I want Desire in here dancing for me, not out there performing for those other guys.
I get out my walkie-talkie and page the DJ.
“Can you please have Desire come in here to the VIP room?” I ask him. “And I’m going to need Dante too.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Samantha asks, her eyes angry slits. “She’s seriously already taken my place?”
“You left it wide open,” I tell her. “And someone better than you walked right in to fill it.”