As I leave the bar, I can’t help but look back one more time at Wade. He’s talking to the bartender, undoubtedly paying our tab.

Look back at me, I urge him, knowing it’s an unfair and selfish request. I’m the one who got up and left, even though he’s the one who deserved it.

He doesn’t look back at me. And I realize it’s better off that way.

So much for re-ignited chemistry. I should have known to leave the past in the past.

There was a reason I walked away the first time. But I still can't think straight now that his perfect abs, huge cock and tempting touch are back in my life.

As soon as I’m back home, I can’t stop thinking about him. I run a bath and hope to relax and read a good book to keep my mind off of him. But soon I’m back to what I do best—fantasizing about my high school boyfriend.

It’s pathetic, after all these years. But I have never been able to resist. And now that I’ve seen him face to face, he’s on my mind more than ever. I’m burning with lust for him and I’m actually quite proud of myself for not giving into his request to go home with him. I’ve got to do something to get him out of my system.

I lay my head back on the edge of the tub and spread my legs open underneath the bubbles, touching my clit the way that Wade used to touch it back in high school.

I had never let him go all the way. I wanted to wait for marriage. I honestly thought I’d be marrying him so I didn’t know I’d be giving up any opportunities. Now, I often regret that I didn’t give into him because at least I would have had the sweet release I’ve been wanting— needing— all these years.

I rub my clit in the same way that Wade used to, but he was better at it. And I finger myself, wishing it was Wade’s cock instead.

My slow fingering and rubbing of myself becomes more intense as I think about all the things Wade used to do to me. He would play with my nipples, suck on them, eat my pussy out like it was his job, and other times he’d bring me to climax just with his hand. He’s also shove his big cock down my throat and make me take all of it. He’d leave me a quivering mess and I couldn’t wait until we actually got married so he could fuck me.

But that never happened. He left for training and I stayed behind because I still had one more year of high school left before graduation and I also knew I wanted to go to college here since it was more affordable than going out of state. The plan was to have a long distance relationship until at some point we could get married.

But he turned into a real dick. Every time I asked him a question on the phone, it was met with a rude and curt reply. It’s like he didn’t want me to know anything about what was going on with his life, but he became increasingly jealous about mine.

I’d never given him any reason not to trust me and I didn’t appreciate the fact that it seemed as if he didn’t. I tried to talk to him about it but it was like trying to have a conversation with a brick wall. And any time I brought anyone up— a teacher, a classmate— he’d become instantly suspicious and pepper me with questions he demanded answers to, even though he never answered any of my otherwise innocuous questions.

I just couldn’t put up with it any more. I decided he had changed into someone I didn’t know any more. I broke up with him, and told myself to never look back.

Yet here I am fantasizing about him just like I have every night since I last saw him. Now that I saw him again, I want him more than ever. I regret what happened, but he’s obviously still a dick— now, he’s a rich douche to boot— so all I have are my fantasies.

I rub myself faster now, a fury of love and hate combining inside me as I pleasure myself. For the millionth time, I imagine Wade bending me over and spreading my legs wide for him.  Then he’ll take my virginity, with that big cock that I know he has and I also know that he knows how to use.

I feel a climax coming on and I imagine him thrusting himself in and out of me like my own fingers are right now. I want him to grab my breasts like he used to do— and grab my hips and ass too— as he fucks me from behind.

I need him. I want him. Against all my better instincts, I just know I’d let him take me if there was a good opportunity.

And then I come, a wave of pleasure ripping throughout my entire body as I moan his name out loud.

“Wade. Wade. Wade.”

Finally, I can relax. I soak in the bubbles for a while and then soap myself up. I towel off and then I bring my iPad to bed with me so I can browse the Internet before I fall asleep. If I can fall asleep— even though I know that dreams of Wade will haunt me, like they usually do.

My eyelids feel heavy as soon as I lie down against the pillow. I know that as soon as I fall asleep, I might jolt awake with anxiety over just having lost my job and blown my second chance with my ex. So I better I’m just about to give in and drift up to sleep when I see a new email notification.

It’s from Wade. It was sent half an hour ago— while I was in the tub thinking about him.

Dear Emily,

It was a pleasure running into you today. I apologize if I offended you by bringing up the past. Let’s concentrate on the future going forward, and keep things professional.

I believe that what the hotel did in firing you was unfair as you are clearly a hard worker and passionate person; the world needs more employees with these qualities. For that reason, I would like to offer you a job with my company. The hours are flexible and can fit around your school schedule.

If you would like to accept, please report to 346 Gold St., Suite M, on Tuesday. If not, no hard feelings and I wish you all the best in the future.

Sincerely,

Wade Covington

My heart flutters as I read and re-read his email. He would like to concentrate on the future and keep things professional. I know I should be happy to read this but instead I feel sad. He’s offering me a job, which I desperately need right now— and it can work with my school schedule, unlike the job I just lost.

It’s too good of an offer to pass up, no matter how it might complicate things. I need the job. And, I think, as I realize I can sleep peacefully tonight after all, I need to see him again. Perhaps there is still hope for a second chance for us after all.