As soon as I leave Ron’s office I head back to the file room. Ruby’s still there, thank goodness.
“Oh, my god,” I tell her, nearly running into the shelf in my hurry to get to her. “I’m so sorry.”
“So sorry for what?” she asks.
“For ever— um…”
I was about to say for ever being into Damien Hudson but then I realize she doesn’t know I’m into him. I’ve been her confidante but I never spill the goods about my own life.
“…for not being able to get here sooner and tell you,” I say. “But Damien Hudson is really mad at you. It sounds like he kind of wants you gone. Or at least off his cases.”
She considers this and nods, as if it doesn’t surprise her very much.
“Well, I did hack him,” she shrugs. “But I did it for love. So, I’ll take whatever consequence I get.”
I start laughing and so does she.
“It’s not like I really need this job all that much,” she says. “Cameron just likes to have me close by and likes my help. I don’t think I’ll get fired but if I do, oh well.”
We laugh again but I’m thinking, must be nice. I need to work here until I can afford to move out of my parents’ house and even then, I’ll still need to slave away to be able to afford rent.
“So why do look flushed?” Ruby asks, changing the subject.
“What?” I ask her, playing innocent.
“I know that look,” she says. “I know all about this. You’re in looooooove.”
“I am not,” I insist.
“Well, you’re at least in like. In lust?”
I laugh. I can’t help it.
“You like Damien Hudson, don’t you?” she demands.
I shrug.
“I may have, but since he’s not fond of you, I don’t like him that much any more.”
“I knew it,” she says. “And don’t let me ruin a good thing.”
“Oh, just because you had sex with an older man, now it’s a good thing?” I ask.
“I certainly think it is,” she says. “Not that I have anything to compare it to.
I don’t either, but I don’t admit that.
“I bet he’d know what to do to you,” she says, the corners of her mouth turning up in a smile. “And I bet you’d enjoy it.”
“Very funny,” I tell her, but I know she’s right.
I wish I could just let go and be with Damien but I still have too many hang-ups. Most notably being that he’s out to get my friend. She may not care, but I do.
“Well, I have to go deliver these files to Cameron,” she says, holding onto the files she had gathered while I was in his office.
“Uh huh,” I tell her, with a teasing grin. “You mean you have to go deliver yourself to him.”
She giggles and says, “Maybe,” as she leaves.
I reach into the small bag with a shoulder strap that I carry with me and retrieve my vape pen. I’m not supposed to do this at work. But I’ve had quite the day. First I get to see the man I’ve been crushing on, fantasizing about, since I met him. Then I find out he has it out for my only friend here at the firm. I think I deserve a little hit.
But as soon as I take one, I hear someone clearing their throat at the entrance to the file room. I jump and then shove the vape pen into my pocket.
Turning my head, I see that it’s him. Damien.
I had a feeling it was.
I don’t know if he saw what I had been doing or not. But he doesn’t look too happy.
I remind myself that it doesn’t matter because I’m not too happy with him either. One look as his muscular build and tall stature is enough to make me wet, and embarrassed, remembering how I touch myself thinking at him when I’m at home alone. I have to keep my wits about me.
“I came to talk to you,” he says.
“Well that much is clear,” I can’t help but snap back at him.
At first he looks a little wounded but then he looks defiant.
“What’s wrong with you?” he asks, shutting the door to the filing room behind him.
I can’t help but feel a little excited. Why did he close the door? What does he want to do to me?
“Nothing,” I respond.
“I want your phone number,” he says.
As he says it, he reaches out and grabs my ass. I straighten up, my head and my heart at war with each other. Logically I think I should slap him or scream. But emotionally I want him to keep doing it.
“My phone number?”
“Yes,” he says, looking as surprised as I am that that’s what he’s asking for. “Your phone number.”
He puts his hand back on my ass.
“You can’t have it,” I tell him.
“Why not?”
“You don’t like Ruby.”
“What?”
He looks at me like I’m insane. And maybe I am.
“You want her canned.”
“I do not.”
“Yes you do. I heard you.”
“She’s not my favorite person in the world and I want her out of my private information but I don’t want her canned. Who Cameron decides to employ— or fuck— is none of my business.”
When he says “fuck” he looks me straight in the eyes. My panties get even wetter than they were.
But I’m determined not to give into him. I’m no pushover. And I don’t trust him. Even though I want him.
He leans in, bends down and kisses me. I kiss him back, despite telling myself not to. His grip on my ass gets stronger.
I want to kiss him forever. But I know he’ll respect me more— and I’ll respect myself more— if I don’t.
I break free from his tongue, which requires all the will power in the world.
“It’s the end of the day and I need to go home now,” I tell him, as if to remind him how much younger than him I am. “My dad will wonder where I am.”
And just like that, I walk away from him, telling myself to forget all about him, but knowing that I’m not going to be able to.