I woke up feeling a little strange—as if I’d been taken captive by aliens, but I knew there were two reasons for me feeling this way.

I was really warm, almost uncomfortably warm, and I was sweating slightly as I traced a finger on my sheets. The other issue was the fact my head was hurting so much. It was an uncontrollable pain, as if my head was about to explode. I tried to move my head, but I couldn’t because it felt as if it was an erupting volcano.

What the fuck was I thinking last night? I thought to myself with a light groan.

I didn’t often drink, even when it was wine. The most I’d ever had was when some of the pastries I made needed wine in them. Like my parents, I took the occasional champagne at a party, and wine was saved for special occasions.

And yet, Laura and I had gone through two bottles last night, which I would have to remember to replace before the rest of the staff realized, or I’d be in some serious trouble because they were both expensive bottles. Not only was I hung over, my skin felt icky with dried sweat, and the inside of my mouth tasted disgusting.

I couldn’t even remember most of what she and I had talked about and I wondered if I’d told her anything particularly incriminating. We were having fun, and it was the first time for me in a long time, so I’d let myself go.

Regret curled into my stomach now. Not only regret, I realized, as my stomach gurgled and I had a moment where I was worried the wine and cake from last night would come right back up. I frowned and curled in on myself as much as I could, swallowing down the need to vomit. The wave of nausea passed, and I let out a sigh.

But then, there was a third thing. I was in a bed that wasn’t my own because it was too large and soft. There was also the fact I wasn’t alone in it. In fact, I couldn’t curl up much when I tried, because I was being held close to a body larger than mine by strong arms.

My memories from last night weren’t all gone, and I knew who I would see when I opened my eyes. I didn’t want to, just yet, because I knew the moment I did, I would want to run away.

But my curiosity won out. After a minute of debating with myself, I let my eyes flutter open, and there he was.

Trent. I was lying in bed wrapped in Trent’s arms.

It was a dream come true, even though teenage me had thought it would be so much more innocent. Nevertheless, Trent was holding me close enough that I knew he was completely naked. And so was I.

My body started to heat up all on its own as memories from last night bombarded my thoughts.

Oh, shit.

I was tempted to squirm but I didn’t want to wake him up.

Why not, though?

I paused at the thought, realizing I did want to wake him up. The thoughts from last night were all wonderful, but I wanted more than just a memory. I wanted to shake him awake. I wanted to feel him between my thighs once more, his cock inside me, filling me up and moving deliciously in ways that drove me crazy with lust. I wanted to kiss him again, taste his silky skin one more time.

Not that I could kiss him with the way my mouth tasted. With my head still aching slightly and my body feeling so icky. There was something uncomfortable between my thighs when I shifted them, and I thought it would be better if I could have a bath and brush my teeth first. Maybe gargle some mouthwash to get rid of the disgusting taste in my mouth.

So, no waking Trent up for some morning fun. I would be too awkward about it anyway, with last night being my first time and all. I remembered him remarking I was tight and hoped he hadn’t realized that fact.

But more than that, I knew it was a mistake.

I bumped into him and seduced him last night. We both got lost in the moment, but he would regret it when his eyes opened and he saw who was lying next to him.

Before that happened, I had to be gone.

This was all my fault. I couldn’t say I’d been plastered last night, but I hadn't exactly been sober either. Running into him was one thing, and I didn’t know where the courage to kiss him even came from, but I knew he would blame me for coming on to him.

I’d had enough shit from this guy as it was. Thinking of the fallout from last night’s activities was enough to make my stomach churn some more.

This shouldn’t have happened at all. I rubbed my thighs together, feeling uncomfortable at the soreness between my legs, only to freeze when I remembered what it meant.

We didn’t use protection last night.

Shit!

With sudden urgency, I started to move. I did so carefully, doing my best not to wake him. His arms slid out from around me, and I got off the side of the bed, standing up. Almost immediately, I was falling, but I managed to hold onto the bed and brace myself so I wouldn’t end up on the floor. My legs were just a little wobbly, but what surprised me was how sore I felt between my legs. How had I not noticed that?

I winced as I straightened up once more, better prepared now. I walked around the room, looking for my dropped clothes, and pulling them all on, grimacing at how disgusting I felt. I needed to get back to my room and take a shower.

Fully dressed, I tiptoed out of the room, taking a last glance at Trent sleeping peacefully before I ran.

Back in my room, I tossed my clothes off and went straight to the shower. I ducked under the spray before it could warm up and I stood under it, letting the water wash over me and sluice away the aches.

I was panicking.

We didn’t use any protection last night!

I was a virgin, and I’d had myself tested before. There was no worry on my end, and while I didn’t know about Trent because he wasn’t a celibate, I had to believe he probably took care of himself. That controlling personality of his wouldn’t allow for anything less, would it?

But there was another, bigger worry, and I didn’t know what to do with it.

“What happens if I get pregnant?” I said to myself, my voice hushed.

I hadn't been on any contraceptives before because I didn’t have a sex life. So last night had come out of nowhere. I knew there were pills I could take, the morning after pills. I just didn’t know if I could bring myself to take them? Could I bring myself to do that to a possible pregnancy? The thought of being pregnant was a little daunting in my current position, but I was even more worried about what would happen if I did nothing about the possibility.

What was I going to do?

The question whirled around in my mouth as I washed myself thoroughly, grimacing when I caught some spots of red when I washed between my thighs. I washed up twice and rinsed, then stepped out, wrapping a towel around my body and another one around my hair.

I stopped in front of my bathroom mirror and stared at my reflection. It had been a while since I’d last looked at myself, and I realized I had changed. My face looked the same, but after last night, I was no longer a virgin, and it was something I would never get back.

Not that I regretted it. I’d been saving it for the right man, and for me, that had always been Trent.

“But I need to take care of the consequences,” I told myself firmly.

There was only one decision I could make. If Trent found out I was pregnant, would he even let me explain? What happened if he didn’t care and walked away? He would hate me, and he would never forgive me if I ended up pregnant from our one-night stand. Trent would never ever forgive me.

“I need the pill.” The words came out in a harsh whisper, and the look of horror that crossed my face was exactly how I felt in my chest.

After drying up, I looked for new clothes to pull on. I picked up a t-shirt and jeans, then pulled a hoodie on top, pulling the hood down to cover my face. I pulled on my sneakers then picked up my purse and left.

There was a pharmacy a short distance from the hotel. It was close enough to walk. I went slowly anyway, but ten minutes later, I was exchanging cash for the pills I would need.

“Here you go,” the girl behind the counter said, grinning up at me. “Next time you need a plan so you don’t need the emergency pills. A lot of women don’t like taking them. You need to see a doctor to set up a contraception plan.”

I gave her a pained smile. “Thanks for the advice,” I murmured as I walked away.

I wasn’t hiding the fact I was ashamed of what I was doing, and it was nice of her to take the time to explain it to me. I could have just stopped and thought about using condoms last night and I wouldn’t be in the position I was in, I reminded myself. I’d been a virgin last night, but I hadn't been an idiot, so the fault was completely my own.

On the walk back to the hotel, I moved even slower, contemplating this step I was about to take. I shouldn’t have treated sex so lightly in the first place, no matter how caught up in the moment I was, and this was kind of like my punishment. I kept going back and forth about what to do. By the time I made it to my room, I knew what I was going to do, and my eyes were already stinging with tears.

I went to my kitchen and got a glass of water, then sat with it on my small counter. I took five whole minutes staring at the glass of water and the pills before I removed one from the sheet with trembling hands.

“I’m doing this,” I whispered to the empty room. My eyes dropped down to my tummy, and I placed one trembling hand over it, blinking back another wash of tears. “I’m so sorry.”

With that apology, I picked up the pill, threw it into my mouth, and swallowed it down with the water.

An hour later, it was time for my shift. I’d taken another quick shower and dressed in a different set of clothes. I headed down to the staffroom where the lockers were located and pulled on my white coat. I tied back my hair and tucked it under my chef’s hat.

What am I going to do? I thought again.

There was no way I could ever face Trent again, not after last night. Not after I’d thrown myself at him like that. He was already an asshole to me at the best of times; his smirking was going to be astronomical after this!

I couldn't deal with it. It had been hard enough having him laugh at me for a chaste kiss. Him making fun of me after we’d slept together… any bit of self-esteem I managed to gather while he was gone would go down the drain.

Should I quit? I wondered to myself. It might be for the best. I’d have to move someplace else. Maybe back in with my parents? There’d be no reason for us to meet as long as I kept to the servant halls and entries and exits.

I didn’t want to be a bother to my parents, though. Besides, they’d ask why I was suddenly so eager to move back home when I’d been just as eager to leave after high school.

Or, I thought, brainstorming, I could always try moving to another location. The hotel has several branches, and I was offered a job at any of the others…

It would mean going far away from my parents. I’d decided to stay in Charlotte because I didn’t want to be away from them. But there was nothing else I could do, was there? I’d do anything if it meant getting away from Trent and seeing that smirk of his ever again.

My mind drifted to thoughts of last night. I remembered the soft touches he’d placed on my shoulder, the sweet way he’d kissed me. But I knew I couldn’t think of it as making love. To Trent, we’d fucked, and that was it. Everything I’d imagined in my mind didn’t mean anything to him. And it shouldn’t mean anything to me either.

Trent was a dick, I’d known it for a while. What had been so beautiful to me would just be another weapon in his arsenal, and I was not going to stick around for him to use it against me.

I had a feeling if he ever did use it, it would be enough to destroy me. I could leave after he’d done it, or I could do it before, and I knew which I was going to pick for the sake of my self-preservation.

I’m sorry Mom and Dad, I thought, sending out another round of apologies. I know I’d been the one to make the promise, but it looks like I’m going to go far away.

I was determined, and as I went to work, I wasn’t distracted.