Carla had no memory of her past, of her present, and had no idea who any of the people, in what she was told was her home, was. The man claiming to be her husband, Samuel, was handsome but she had no memory of him. She’d obviously given birth to the child, her body had been through some kind of ordeal, after all, but she could not remember the pregnancy. She did not recognize the house, the servants, or even the street they lived on. She could not remember anything about her life before she woke up finally.

Dr. Weiss informed Samuel it must have been from the trauma of the birth, or perhaps something had happened to her mind during the ordeal. He was not sure and being a wise man, would make no certain claims because he didn’t have the means of finding out or the knowledge of the mind required to form an answer. He knew only that amnesia was possible, real, and that Carla was obviously suffering from it. Dr. Weiss told Samuel he did not know if Carla would recover, but had hope that she would and that was all he could tell the worried husband.

Carla was upset about not knowing anyone but faced it with a stoic resignation and strength. She fed her child now that she’d recovered enough to produce milk, played with her, and loved her as fiercely as she could. They’d named the girl Chloe, though they both continued to call her Butterfly because she was so delicate and tiny. Carla also continued to heal over the coming weeks and was now able to walk outside with her daughter in her arms and her husband by her side.

As far as Carla knew she had married Samuel for love, they’d had a long courtship, and had looked forward to the birth of their child with joy. She could not remember her melancholy but sometimes she’d remember staring out of her window and a tune playing. She asked Samuel about the music but he had no idea where she’d heard any of it, he told her. She didn’t either and soon dismissed the memories as her days were filled with relearning her husband and getting to know her child.

Samuel knew he’d lied to Carla but hoped if she ever regained her memory that she’d know now that he truly did love her and would forgive his untruths. They were happy and Samuel and Carla were eager to share a bed together again, but the doctor refused to allow her to recommence her marital duties until she was completely healed. He did not want her to risk reintroducing the infection or do any damage to the healing tissue within her body. Samuel understood, but Carla seemed to be impatient and she longed to be held in her husband’s arms without their clothing in the way, and to feel his hands on her aching body.

Carla had fallen in love with her husband over the weeks. His attentiveness to her needs was endearing and he’d only leave her when he had to go into his office. Every time he left, he brought her and Chloe presents when he returned. They read books together, discussed what they’d read, discussed events in the newspapers, talked and laughed, and played with their daughter. Their days were idylls marred only by Samuel’s trips into his office. She knew he belonged to a very rich steel production family and that he had obligations to meet so she did not complain, after all, his work provided for their family.

Carla loved Samuel’s laugh, the way his face would turn serious when they were having a debate on some matter, and how he always listened to her opinions. She did not think there was a freer woman in all of England nor a happier one. Her marriage was perfect, and she was content. Then the doctor came and told Carla she could resume her marital duties after inspecting her, and Carla knew her wish was finally going to come true. She’d prepared for the day, purchasing some French lingerie she’d seen in a shop window on an outing with Chloe and bathed, wanting her hair and body to smell nice, as well as following the doctor’s order to maintain hygiene. He’d been most adamant about bathing and washing one’s hands to the point that even the staff members were insisting on cleanliness in their own homes.

Carla had several candles lit in her husband’s bed chamber, put on the lace nightgown and peignoir, had her husband’s meal delivered to his room, closed the curtains at the window and waited. He was soon home, and stood in his bedroom door in awe at the stunning woman before him. Carla’s dark brown hair rested gently at her exposed breasts, her cleavage on display above the dark red lace, and her body recovered from her ordeal. Her hips were still a bit plump and there was a softness to her body where one might expect sharp angles but that softness only enhanced her beauty. Samuel felt his body reacting to the sheer beauty of his wife, and knew he’d be missing dinner, for a little while at least.

He moved to the bed where Carla was stretched out and touched a curl resting against her right breast. Her skin was pale, almost translucent and Samuel worried his attentions could harm her delicate health. Carla saw the concern mar his features and brushed her hand across his forehead, wiping away the worry.

“I’m fine, I will be fine, so don’t worry my darling, just love me, please? I need to know what I’ve been missing all these weeks. I don’t remember this part of our past either and I feel like a schoolgirl, so nervous and excited, like it’s my first time all over again. I hope I can please you.” She whispered to him, nervousness making her voice shake.

“It will be perfect, Carla, just like you. I only hope I can please you. I’m nervous as well.” He kissed her then, his full lips resting gently against her own. Carla enjoyed the feel of his lips pressed against hers and opened her own to take a breath. She was shocked when Samuel softly pressed his tongue between her lips, apparently taking her movement as an invitation, but accepted his intrusion. She slid her tongue along his own, unaware of what she should do but following her own instincts. Samuel encouraged her exploration with a groan and a tightening of his fist in her hair.

Samuel’s movement did not hurt Carla, she rather felt she had a power that she did not know she possessed when his hand tensed in her hair. She enjoyed the feeling the sound gave her, the pleasure that came from her insides tensing, and knowing that she’d made him make that noise. She wanted to do it again but was unsure of what else to do. Instinct told her to touch him and she reached out a hand, cupping his face as he kissed her.

Carla moved her hand down his neck, over his chest, exploring what made the hard muscles beneath his shirt tense, learning that a finger brushed over his flat male nipples caused his breath to hitch in his throat and made his hips jerk. She removed his shirt, wanting to touch his skin, and used her mouth to cover his chest and neck with her kisses. Carla tasted his skin, felt the silkiness of it with her tongue, and took her time learning her husband’s body.

As she explored, the tension Carla felt between her legs increased. She knew that the feeling was caused by her husband, she’d felt it before, but had no idea it could grow so strong, so powerful, that her hips would react to his movements, that she’d want something but not know what it was she wanted. She quickly learned what she’d been after when Samuel took over and slid the gown from her body after he removed the rest of his own clothing. She needed his touch, the press of his fingers into her waist, the feel of his mouth on her breasts, and the feel of his hips between her own.

She felt his hardness there, the part that made him a male though she had no idea what it was called, and knew where it had to go. The doctor had examined her enough that she was aware of where he wanted to put the rather large appendage, but was worried it would not fit. Then she remembered Chloe and knew it must have fit before so it must now. Carla thrust her hips into his own, asking him to ease the ache within her without a word, and held her breath as he moved to answer her request.

Carla tensed as Samuel moved, but he eased her with a kiss to her lips, taking away any fear she may have felt. She rested her head against the pillow, looking up into Samuel’s eyes as he entered her body, sliding in slowly, carefully. She closed her eyes, concentrating on how it felt to be joined to her husband. As he began to move she felt her tension building again, a feeling of pleasure washing over her with each movement. She listened to his breathing and knew her own was just as ragged. She clutched at his arms, unable to stop the thrusting of her own hips as they moved up to meet his body, and began closing her eyes as a new incredible feeling filled her from their joined bodies, the feeling soon shooting out to make her back arch and her mind go blank. She had no idea what this was called but could see why people so enjoyed this act now.

Her body calmed as Samuel’s seemed to surge, his cries growing louder as his hips moved faster and Carla joined Samuel again in the bliss he gave to her, hoping he now felt the same sensations and pleasure he was giving to her. Samuel must have been because he threw his head back with a shout and thrust into her sharply several times before his hips stilled, his hands holding him on trembling arms. She could feel his body spasm inside of her and knew when it eased.

Samuel rested then, his tension gone but not wanting to crush Carla beneath him. When he regained his senses he moved off of his wife, clutching her to him. Carla kissed his neck and spoke to him as her fingers threaded their way through his chest hairs.

“I love you, Samuel. I will love you for eternity if you’ll let me.” Carla whispered to him.

“That’s all I’ve ever wanted, my dove, my peace, I only ever wanted your love. I will love you for eternity as well. And our little Chloe. Our little miracle. I will love you both for the rest of my life.” His words ended on a gentle snore and Carla smiled as she settled down to her first night in her husband’s arms. Well, the first night she remembered, at least.

The next day, Samuel moved his family to the country estate that had been in his family for generations now. He wanted to remove her from any polite society members that might want to gawk at the child or her, now that she was healed, who could reveal the truth to her. She still did not know she’d been married previously and he’d refused all visitors, having the butler keep all of the mail for his inspection only.

Samuel wrote to Carla’s family, informing them she was still too ill for visitors, and refused all invitations for the family. He was starting to feel guilty about his deception and wondered if he could keep up the lies but lived in fear that Carla would leave him and that their ideal life would end. Carla loved the country home and he hoped that would be enough to keep her from wondering why they had no visitors.

One person refused to take Samuel’s avoidance anymore and decided to make her way to the estate, where her servants had learned the family had retired to. She arrived one morning when Samuel was out riding, hoping to see the child that could possibly be her grandchild. Beatrice had thought over past events and suspected that she may have been duped by Elizabeth Rogers. She knew herself that Carla had received no correspondence from the woman because she collected the mail each day, and knew that Carla had never been seen in public with the woman. Perhaps she’d been too hasty in throwing Carla out. She dismissed her guilt by reassuring herself she’d been distraught over her son’s death and felt the need to claim the child that could only possibly be his. Surely Henry had broken Carla enough, Beatrice herself had heard the young woman’s screams, that adultery would not have crossed his young wife’s mind?

Determined to claim the child as a Debenham and take it home with her, Beatrice had travelled into the country to collect it. Beatrice wasn’t even sure if the child was a boy or a girl but at this point she did not care, she only wanted the child to fill her empty life. Stepping out of the vehicle, Beatrice walked up to the front door and opened it, not even bothering to knock.

She walked around the house looking for the family, finally finding them as she walked into the sitting room. The large picture window revealed Carla on a blanket, playing with the baby on her lap, a nurse nearby on a white painted metal chair ready to take over should Carla grow tired. Samuel was not there, which should make taking the baby from Carla easier, Beatrice thought as she found a door to the back garden.

Walking out to the family, Beatrice was unaware of the events surrounding Chloe’s birth and was confused when Carla, rather than showing fear, smiled and offered up a hello.

“Hello, Carla, I’ve come to collect the child.” Beatrice spoke coldly and with assurance, barely glancing at the child.

“Pardon me? Collect the child? Who do you think you are?” Carla asked as she gathered the baby to her.

“I’m its grandmother and I’m here to take it home, that’s what its father would want, please don’t make a scene.” Beatrice was so certain the child was a Debenham she didn’t even bother to look at it.

“You aren’t Chloe’s grandmother, I can assure you of that, her grandmother is dead, my husband can vouch for that. And you obviously aren’t my mother, I know that as well. So tell me again, why should I hand over my child to you? In fact, nurse, call a footman and have this lady removed from the property. She’s obviously unbalanced.” Carla turned back to the baby, setting her in her pram and making to move past the unbalanced woman in her garden. But the woman grabbed the pram, pulling back the cover to reveal little Chloe inside. The child was the spitting image of her father, from her delicate nose to her full lips, and Beatrice knew that Henry could not be this child’s father. Samuel must be!

“You whore! How dare you try to pass this child off as a Debenham! I’m glad I kicked you out after Henry died now! You broke your marriage vows and betrayed him with his best friend. Have you no class, no breeding at all?” The woman was enraged and raised the umbrella she’d brought with her, knocking Carla over the head with it. Carla fell under the woman’s deranged wrath, and hit her head against a metal point on the chair, knocking herself senseless.

She awoke moments later to see a footman escorting the woman while Samuel held his wife in his arms, carrying her up to the house. Unlike the last time she’d awoken from being unconscious she knew who her husband was, knew who he’d been all along, and knew that Samuel had lied to her. She could guess why he’d lied to her but his lies felt like a betrayal of her trust. She’d lost her freedom again and now he’d betrayed the unquestioning trust she’d given him. There was no going back from that.

“Samuel, I’m fine, put me down, please.” Carla asked quietly.

“No darling, I’m taking you to our room. Chloe is safe and Beatrice is being escorted home, you’re safe now.” Samuel said, placing a kiss on her head.

“No! Put me down now!” Carla demanded. Samuel was confused about her angry tone but did as she demanded.

“What did she say to you, my dove? It’s all lies, I promise you.” Samuel assured her.

“No, no they weren’t lies. You see, dear husband, I can remember it all now. Every last detail of my life has been revealed to me. Down to the very lies you told me. I understand why you did it, but you lied. Very big lies and I simply won’t have it. You have to go. You’ve betrayed me and the damage cannot be undone. You have to go.” The cold defeated look in her eyes told Samuel that all was lost and he quietly walked away, knowing that now was not the time to argue his case.

Carla went to her room and cuddled her baby, the only good thing to come from the mess she’d made of her life. She’d only wanted to build a home for herself, some kind of security, and to end Henry’s torture and experiments meant to get her pregnant. Instead, she’d somehow turned her life into a shambles. It could not go on this way; she would live under no man’s thumb or with his lies. She could do this, with or without Samuel, and for now her choice was without.