I was on my way out of the main part of the mansion and heading out when I saw the sense in my mom’s words. I’d helped my mom with her work, and she’d even insisted I spend the night because by the time we were done with everything it was too late for me to have gone home. I turned around, my exhaustion telling me to stay.

It was a mistake.

I knew it even as I agreed with Mom’s suggestion, and I sure as heck was regretting it now.

Of all the people… of all the times… why did it have to be Trent?

I knew I must have looked like an idiot, just standing there and acting like I’d seen a ghost or something. It was rude, and as soon as it occurred to me I tried to shift my expression to something polite, my lips trembling a little as the corners turned up in a smile.

“Hello,” I said, at the very least trying to be civil.

Trent didn’t even bother with that. As soon as I opened my mouth and spoke, he just frowned at me and stormed off.

Maybe he was in a hurry, I tried to tell myself. It had absolutely nothing to do with me.

But then I heard him muttering to himself as he walked off, not even bothering to keep his voice quiet.

“Servants using the front entrance now… my how things have changed around here…”

The words left me stricken, but by the time I turned around, he was already out of sight.

Fuck! Damn you, Trent!

It had been years. Fucking years, and yet he was still the one person that could make me feel smaller than an ant with just a few callous words. If anyone else had said those words, it would have been easy to brush them off. They could have been jealous or their dislike of me would have been petty. I didn’t know exactly how Trent felt about me, but everything he said hit me harder than words from other people.

Just what the fuck had I been doing in all those years we’d been apart? I should have used it to get over this bastard.

Mood completely ruined, I turned back around. I didn’t want to head the direction he’d gone. The chances we’d bump into each other twice were low, but I didn’t want to risk it. Feeling incredibly stung, I headed back to my mom’s apartment in the servants’ wing.

You shouldn’t still feel like this, I chided myself as I felt old wounds tearing open. What exactly did you expect, anyway? You knew it would be bad!

And I had known. I’d had it in my mind to keep away from Trent as much as was humanly possible for the duration of his stay. It probably wouldn’t be long anyway; he’d always been itching to leave, so I doubted he’d come back to stay. As soon as Mr. Thompson was back on his feet and was able to do his work, Trent would probably leave.

Good riddance, I thought, but it was weak.

“Honey? You’re back already?”

I looked up at my mom as I walked into the apartment. It was pretty spacious especially since it was part of the servant’s quarters, the place I’d grown up in. The Thompsons were nice enough to provide their servants with good living. Our family’s apartment consisted of a normal sized living room, two bedrooms, two bathrooms, and a cooking area. Not that we cooked much since there were always leftovers from Thompson’s meals to eat.

It was like we had our own small house within the mansion. When I was younger, I still hadn't grasped the difference between our small space and most of the mansion that belonged to the Thompsons.

“Hey, Mom,” I said, giving her a wan smile. “I’m back. Sorry to bother you again today.”

I was trying my best to keep up appearances, but damn, was it hard. I wasn’t sure if it was something in my face or my voice that gave me away, but Mom looked slightly alarmed like she could tell I wasn’t really fine with just a glance.

“What’s wrong?” she asked. “Did something happen? You’ve barely been out of this room for five minutes…”

It would be better if I didn’t mention to her that I’d met Trent at all. Let alone that the drop in my mood was because of him. I’d have to explain a bit more, and I was going to keep my crush on Trent a secret from my mother for as long as possible.

“It’s nothing, really,” I said dismissively. “I just saw the sense in your words. I might as well stay a little longer, there’s nothing wrong with it after all.”

She pursed her lips, but I knew she was pleased. “You know I can't stay here to look after you, right? I’m going to be heading to bed. We’ll have a very busy day tomorrow.”

I shrugged. It wasn’t like I needed a babysitter. “I just thought I should get some sleep, Mom, you don’t have to worry so much. Work doesn’t start for a few more hours and I don’t need to go back to my place just to rest when I could stay right here.”

Mom frowned at me. “You were in such a hurry to be on your way, though. Do you need me to get you something?”

I rolled my eyes. “Mom, no need to worry. Just go to bed, okay? Aren’t you totally exhausted by now?”

Her eyebrows shot up as she glanced at the watch around her wrist. It was one Dad had saved up to buy for her on their third anniversary. I was surprised the watch even still worked.

“You’re right, I need to get going. My sleeping pill is already starting to work.” She walked over to me, caught me by the tops of the arms, and pecked a quick kiss on my cheek. “Get some good rest, all right? You look terrible, Jessi. Try not to overwork yourself, all right?”

I just nodded and waited for her to leave the room, though I could have told her I loved my job, and it was more relaxing for me more than anything. I didn’t even mind the crazy hours I had to keep, some days getting up extra early, some days staying extra late.

The moment she was out, I couldn’t keep up the façade. I’d been hiding my tears from her, but once I was alone, I could feel my eyes start to sting. I sniffled and tilted my head up as I blinked, refusing to let even a single tear fall.

That bastard…

He hadn't changed at all, had he? If anything, I’d have to say Trent had got worse since the time I’d known him. At least before, he wouldn’t have acted like that. Not that he would have been nicer, but some verbal acknowledgment was better than getting a frown, then him walking away from me.

“What the fuck did I ever do to you, anyway?” I muttered to myself as I moved over to the couch and plopped down. “Besides making the stupid decision of loving you…”

It had to be one of the dumbest things I’d ever done. Trent obviously still thought so. I could feel my old resentment rise the more I thought about it.

Just… what the fuck? Because his father had money, did he have to be such an aloof asshole? It might have got a few girls to turn their heads back in high school, but it annoyed me now as it had then because now I wasn’t looking at him through rose-tinted glasses. Not entirely, anyway.

I was no longer the naïve teenage girl with thoughts of healing the hurting bad boy. Because I could remember a time when he hadn't always been like that.

I sighed to myself and grabbed one of the pillows on the couch and hugged it to my chest.

How long has it been? I mused to myself. The time since he wasn’t like that…

My parents had worked for his family long before I was born. I was pretty much raised in the mansion, just like all the Thompson kids, only in a different wing from it that they barely ever paid attention to, besides the ever-curious Emily.

Trent and I had known each other from the time we were born. So I’d seen what he was like before he suddenly changed.

Back when we were young, I’d attributed the change to the loss of his mother. He was such a happy child it was hard to think he’d grown up to be the asshole I knew today. Everything changed when he was around five and his mother passed away though. Since his dad was so busy, she was the person he’d spent most of his time around, and with her gone it was like he’d lost himself.

Abruptly, his attitude started to change. Once upon a time, he was happy and friendly, but then he grew gloomy and started to isolate himself. His attitude grew worse. When he interacted with others, even with me, he acted more snobbish than he had before, and it only got even worse as he aged.

When I first realized I had a crush on him, I was in my pre-teens. I’d had fantasies back then, that maybe there was a hole in his life, which was why he was acting as he did, and I could be the one to fill that hole his mother had left. I would be the one to soothe the anger he felt toward his step-mother, who ended up replacing his mom in his small family. I saw how he distanced himself from his family after that. He wouldn’t let his step-mom anywhere near him after she had her first child with his dad—a son at that.

I imagine Trent probably felt like he was being replaced. He’d isolated himself from his family, and from her most of all.

I winced just thinking about it. I couldn’t comprehend just what he felt because it was foreign to me. I’d only ever had my parents growing up, and no siblings. My parents had been kept by their duties a lot of the time, and I’d come to know pretty early on that they couldn’t look after me all the time.

The thought had pushed me to gain some independence. I didn’t want to depend so much on them because it felt like I was just a burden to them.

Still, there was never a time when I thought that I wasn’t loved equally by both of my parents, even when we didn’t get to see a lot of each other.

I let out an explosive sigh, coming to a decision.

“I’ll have to keep helping Mom when she needs me,” I muttered. “I can't exactly get out of that. I just have to stay out of his way.”

I wasn’t a servant at the Thompson mansion, but I knew where all the servant entrances were and I could go back to using them like I had when I was a kid. Emily would notice, but I could always just give her some excuse.

I decided to completely work Trent out of my system. There was nothing else I could do, was there?

Childish fantasies and whims aside, even if I could somehow get him to let me in, there was no way I’d be able to heal a man who was so full of himself and his anger that he forgot the rules of common courtesy.

It was probably pointless, and more importantly, I couldn’t do that to myself. I drifted into sleep, the quiet of the house a balm to my aching soul.