Chapter Sixteen
Ben rammed the ax into the log, a sick satisfaction hitting his already sore and fatigued muscles.
“What the hell, Ben?”
Ben turned in the direction of his brother’s voice. He hadn’t even heard him pull up. It was cloudy and it looked like rain, maybe a storm. Good. Perfect. He hoped a tree would fall on his property, then he’d have more wood to chop.
He was in the back of his house and, until now, enjoying speaking to no one. He didn’t want to talk to anyone. He swung the ax high again and then down into the log, watching it split into two and fall onto the grass.
“You do know you have a furnace, right? Like, you don’t actually need to chop wood for heat?”
He ignored his brother’s sarcastic remark and went to pick up another log, but Finn got in his way, blocking him. He really wanted to knock him over, but then that would lead to a fight, and that would upset their mother who was still recovering. “What do you want, Finn? I already called in sick to work.”
“You’ve never called in sick. Ever.”
This was a different kind of sick; he hadn’t been able to sleep, eat, or function for days. This was the kind of sick that no one could have prepared him for. It was the kind that ripped your insides apart without a hope in hell of healing, because he knew he couldn’t make any of it better.
He’d lost his shot at making it better, at helping Molly. He’d lost his shot because she’d been manipulated, and he’d been purposefully tossed aside. He wasn’t arrogant enough to think he could have taken away Molly’s pain, but maybe he could have been her rock, maybe she wouldn’t have felt so alone. He would have held her in the dark, he would have whispered whatever she’d needed to hear, he would have taken her to the doctor, to therapy, to the hospital. But instead he’d been here, thinking how badly she’d treated him. He’d sat here, feeling sorry for himself. But Molly…Molly had been living in hell.
He had been shut out of everything, and he was angry as hell. He was helpless. He felt so damn helpless and that was a new and very sickening feeling for him. He was angry at men in general. He was angry that he didn’t know who the guy was. He was angry at Marlene. He was angry at the whole damn world.
He ignored his brother and walked toward the house where he knew he had an open bottle of whiskey waiting for him. “Go away,” he said to Finn.
“Right. I’ve had to put up with you way too long to just leave you now. Besides, Mom would be pretty pissed at me if I just let you turn into some kind of beast mountain recluse.”
Ben ignored him and walked up the back steps of his house, opened the door, and walked straight to the whiskey.
“Wash your hands, bro, like what the hell?”
Ben looked down at his dirty, sweaty hands and reluctantly walked over to the kitchen sink and washed them. Finn was standing in the doorway looking around his place, no doubt wondering why the hell it looked like such a sty.
Ben sat his tired ass down on the couch, picking up the bottle and taking a long drink. This was where he’d sat with Molly.
He squeezed his eyes shut because he saw her face again, when she sat here crying and telling him. He saw the girl she’d been. He saw the girl who shut the door on him, and now, looking back he could see the fear in her face, in her eyes. And then, what had tortured him all night, he saw the guy, he imagined what he’d done to her, and he was torn between puking and violence.
“Holy crap, are you crying?”
Crying? He didn’t cry. He ran his hands down his face and felt the moisture on his hands. He cleared his throat and opened his eyes. “No, loser. It’s from the wind. What do you want?”
“Uh, I don’t know, to make sure you’re not plotting murder or suicide?”
He shrugged. “I don’t want to talk to anyone. Go away.”
His brother sat down with a casual indifference that put his teeth on edge. “What’s going on? And do you need to have your stomach pumped?” he asked, pointing to the empty bottle of whiskey.
“Yes. And no. There are beers in the fridge. And that bottle wasn’t full when I started.”
Finn didn’t really look like he believed him but walked across the room and came back a minute later holding a cold beer. “So what happened? Molly?”
“Molly,” he said, even though it actually hurt to say her name. He’d failed her. He wasn’t able to make any of it better. He could never make any of it go away. He hadn’t been there for her then, and he couldn’t be there for her now.
“I’ll do my best not to be insulting since you look really close to the edge, but what did you do? Did you look like this when she left, because that might be reason number one?”
He couldn’t tell Finn. It wasn’t his place to tell him. But there was no hiding that something had happened. He couldn’t fake that. And a part of him needed to talk to someone. “Something happened to her. She told me the truth about why she broke up with me back then; she never cheated on me,” he said, needing to make that clear. It was a God-awful thing to think because it was damn far from the truth. He didn’t want anyone thinking of her as less than perfect, because she was.
“The baby?”
Ben covered his face and swore. “It’s so messed up, man. Her mother is a piece of work. It’s worse than I could have every thought.”
“Wow. Well, then I’m glad she told you. So, why aren’t you back together? We both know she’s the reason you never settled down with anyone else.”
He didn’t even bother denying it. Molly was the reason he’d never fallen in love again. “She’s still going through some…stuff. I don’t know if it’s the kind of thing she’ll ever get over. She also has this crap with her family. Hell, I don’t know how she’s going to stay in this town at all. Too many ghosts here,” he said, staring bleakly into the dark fireplace.
“She needs you.”
He leaned forward, bracing his forearms on his thighs. “I can’t make this better. This isn’t something I can fix for her,” he said roughly.
“Maybe she doesn’t need you to fix it for her. Maybe she just needs you.” Finn looked horrified the minute those sappy sentiments were out of his mouth and let loose in the room. “Hell, I sound like an idiot.”
“You do,” Ben agreed, while secretly contemplating if there was any truth to the statement.
“So what’s your game plan? Sit around here and drink, grow a beard, and stew in your own filth?”
Ben nodded. “Sounds fine to me.”
“Bull.”
“Finn, just go away. This is beyond you or me. You don’t know what you’re talking about. This is big. This won’t go away. She asked me to leave her alone. She said she can’t stay in Shadow Creek.”
His brother placed his empty beer bottle on the coffee table. “Then leave. With her. I know you want the job as chief…”
Ben looked over at his brother sharply. His entire life had been here. Their mother was here. And despite his outward irritation toward Finn, his brother was his best friend. The station held their family history; it was the last place they’d seen their father alive. He’d never planned on leaving this place. But then, he’d never planned on living his life without Molly. He couldn’t just let her leave here, broken, again. No, she deserved so much more than that. He linked his hands and stared down at the floor. He would leave for her. He’d go anywhere for her. “You’re right,” he said, more forcefully than he expected. “We’ll work out the details. I mean, if I can get her to agree,” he said, realizing him telling her he’d leave with her wasn’t exactly solving the problem. He needed to speak with Marlene. He needed to do that for Molly, whatever happened.
They both stood up and Finn gripped his shoulders, his eyes serious. “You won’t regret doing this for her. I know how much she means to you. Now, go take a shower, shave, and make yourself look like your usual less-than-acceptable self instead of this horror show version. Also? Don’t screw this up. Oh…show up at work tomorrow, ’kay?”
…
Ben rolled his shoulders and felt a bead of sweat drip down his back as he stood at the Mayberry’s front door and waited for someone to open it. He had never considered himself the kind of guy to interfere in family problems, but this went beyond that. This had to do with Molly and how she’d been wronged. Even if she never forgave him for this, he knew in his gut he was doing the right thing.
Her sisters opened the door a moment later, clearly looking puzzled because Molly wasn’t beside him. Apparently, she hadn’t called them. He couldn’t even try to fake a smile as he looked at them. He wasn’t going to tell them Molly’s story, but he knew Molly needed them. He knew how much she loved them and how it had killed her to lie to all of them. “Go see Molly,” he said, his voice sounding harsh and hoarse to his ears.
“What? Is she okay?” Addie said, the color draining from her face.
“Where is she?” Melody said, already grabbing their jackets off the coat rack.
“She’s at the inn,” he said, moving aside so they could get by him.
“Should we get Mom?” Addie asked, pausing on the porch.
He shook his head. “I need to speak with her alone. I think Molly really needs you two, more than anyone else,” he said.
A look of understanding passed through Addie’s eyes, and he knew she was remembering their conversation at the bookstore. She gave him a nod and then jogged down the walkway to Melody who was already waiting in the car.
He took a deep breath and walked into the house. The aroma of freshly brewed coffee wafted through the corridor, almost making it seem like this was a normal visit.
“Girls, who was at the door?” Marlene appeared in the doorway of the kitchen, a brightly colored apron with flowers on the front making her almost look like the picture of domestic bliss. But he knew it was all for appearances.
“They left.”
She frowned and stepped back into the kitchen, letting him enter. “What, where?”
He shoved his hands into his pockets, determined to remain calm and reasonable. “They went to see Molly.”
“Oh, did something happen? Is she ill?”
“My God, Marlene, how can you be so indifferent? You tried to destroy her. You tried to humiliate your own daughter for your career?”
“That’s not true. I was just speaking the truth.”
“You thought I didn’t know. You thought it would send me running and that you’d be able to get rid of me. She’s falling apart, because of this secret you’ve made her keep for nine years,” he said, hearing the accusation in his voice.
She lifted her chin. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. If you’ll excuse me, I have an evening appointment I need to get to.”
“I’m not going anywhere until you talk to me and figure out what you’re going to do to help your daughter.”
“Molly is a stubborn woman. I’ve tried to make amends, but she won’t have anything to do with it.”
“Did you tell her you were wrong?”
“I did nothing wrong,” she said, her hands going to her wide hips.
“She told me everything. She’s been put through hell, and you failed her, Marlene. You are her mother; you should have protected her. You didn’t protect her and you didn’t let me protect her.”
Marlene’s white face turned red, and she took a step toward him. “I did everything for my daughter. I did everything to protect her. The truth doesn’t always mean freedom. How dare you come into my home and accuse me of not being a good mother.”
“Because you told her to lie, to shut me out. You gave her no options. You told her what to do. You used her weak and vulnerable state as an opportunity to control her. If you were so right, then why has she stayed away from her family for almost a decade? She lost out on so many years, on her relationship with her sisters,” he whispered through clenched teeth.
She clutched the counter. “Don’t talk to me about things you don’t understand,” she hissed.
“What about the way you twisted it all around to make Molly doubt herself? You basically made her feel so confused, like she had somehow done something to cause that guy—”
She held up her hand in front of his face, and it took all his self-control not to push it away. “You don’t know, you weren’t there.”
“It doesn’t matter! It doesn’t matter what she was wearing, what she was saying, or how much she drank! She had a right to safety. How dare you. How dare you insinuate that she somehow did something to deserve that!” he yelled, not caring anymore about keeping things cool.
She turned from him. “Get out of my house. I kept my daughter out of the papers, away from scandal. I kept her in school; I kept her focused on her career.”
“You made her think it was her fault.”
“We don’t know—”
“We know. We know. It’s inexcusable, what he did.”
“Get out of my house, Ben.”
“Your daughters are with Molly now. I know she’ll tell them the truth. She’s at the inn. Go there tomorrow. You find Molly. You apologize to her. You tell her it wasn’t her fault. None of it.”
She opened her mouth and spun around to look at him, but he shook his head.
“No. You tell her it wasn’t her fault. And if you have to fake it, then fake it. But you absolve your daughter of any guilt you ever burdened her with.”
“You were always too opinionated and too self-righteous for my liking.”
“If you even think you have a chance in hell of winning that election next year, you’re completely delusional. Those people who witnessed your attempted shaming of Molly are good people—you disgusted all of us. Wrong people to try that with. You’re going down, Marlene.”
He walked out of the room with heavy shoulders, not knowing if he’d done any good or just made everything worse.
…
Molly handed her sisters another box of Kleenex after blowing her own nose. “I’m so sorry I never told you,” she said for what felt like the fiftieth time since she’d told them the truth. They all huddled under the quilt on the king-sized bed at her room in the inn, holding hands.
“Don’t apologize one more time,” Melody said, taking five Kleenexes.
“I hate that we never figured it out, that we just accepted what Mom told us. I was actually angry with you; I thought you didn’t want to be close anymore,” Addie said.
Molly’s heart squeezed. Her sisters had taken the news exactly the way Ben had predicted—they had believed her immediately, without questions, without judgment, without doubt. They’d cried openly and held on to her tightly, reminding her of all the times they’d had epic group hugs growing up. She had no idea how she’d been able to emotionally distance herself for so long. Being here with them made her vow to never be without her sisters again. So many years wasted.
“At the time…when I asked Mom for help, I think I was in a state of shock. I couldn’t think for myself. I went through the motions, but I looked to her to make decisions for me because I could barely even get out of bed.”
“She manipulated you,” Melody whispered, squeezing her hand. “She was so wrong. I think Ben is going to let her have it today.”
Molly shut her eyes and leaned her head back against the headboard. “Poor Ben. I…he doesn’t deserve to be involved in any of this mess.”
“I think Ben would do anything for you, Molly. He looked so angry. I can’t even imagine how that all went down today.”
She hated thinking about their last night…when she’d told him she was leaving. “I told him I couldn’t live in Shadow Creek anymore, this close to Mom. I told him I couldn’t have a relationship with him anymore. I told him he deserved a woman who could give him a family, who could come to him as a whole person,” she whispered, her voice cracking.
Addie blew her nose and waved around a clean Kleenex, letting them know she needed to speak next. Melody poured them all some more tea and then added a shot of brandy in each of their cups. She called it her “wellness blend.” “You’re a whole person; you are what Ben has always needed, and you are who he’s always wanted. It’s not just a coincidence he’s never gotten married. Half the women in this town would be married to him if he were to ask. He’s always wanted you. Always.”
“You should have seen the look on his face today,” Melody said. “He looked so angry. Honestly, I don’t know how Mom is going to handle him. But she created this mess, and there’s no easy way out. I’m packing my bags as soon as I leave here.”
If she were a bigger person, she’d try to defend their mother and preserve the relationship their mother had with Mel and Addie, but she wasn’t. She was comforted by their loyalty.
“Stay with me. I have an extra room. I’m not exactly all set up, but it’s better than staying with Mom,” Addie said.
“Dad. Omigod, he never knew,” Molly said, squeezing her eyes shut.
“I have no idea how she could have kept something like this quiet from him,” Addie said.
Melody frowned. “What do you think Ben said to Mom?”
“I don’t know, but I’m betting it was pretty bad considering we have been here for five or six hours and haven’t heard from either of them,” Melody said, getting off the bed and placing their empty cups on the table by the window. “I think we need to order some room service,” she said, picking up a menu.
“I don’t think this is a night for inn food. I think we need to call Luigi,” Molly said.
Melody put the menu down. “I think you’re right.”
Molly actually managed a smile and it felt good. “Meat-lovers. Ask for lots of napkins; it’s a little greasy.” It was so good to be with her sisters again and no secrets between them anymore. “I think that’s perfect. Spend the night. We have like a decade worth of real conversations to have. No more about me. I want to hear all about the two of you.”
Addie and Mel nodded. “Okay, let’s order two large meat-lovers pizzas from Luigi’s and then two bottles of wine from the inn,” Addie said, jumping off the bed with authority.
Molly and Addie nodded. “Perfect,” Molly said.
Half an hour later, the three of them had spread out the food in the quaint sitting area and Molly finished pouring the wine. She lifted her glass and told herself not to cry. “To the best sisters a girl could ever have. Thank you for never giving up on me.”
They all clinked glasses and sniffled, all of them promising not to let anything come between them again. Molly sat there knowing this was a new beginning for them but knowing there was still one very big part of her life that still needed repairing. She was going to see him, tomorrow after her shift at work. She was going to claim the man who promised to love her forever.