Chapter Two
Ben handed his brother a coffee in their mother’s small hospital room. The white walls seemed extra depressing this morning, and the room was dim, the blinds closed. There were flowers from him and Finn, Darren, and her posse of friends, which masked a bit of the sterile hospital smell.
“What, you can’t drink coffee and walk?” Finn asked, pointing to his shirt.
He refused to answer him as he settled into one of the uncomfortable chairs beside Finn. He also refused to think about the first time Molly had spilled coffee all over him. It had been love at first sight for him. God, what a moron he’d been when he was young.
He stared at their mother instead of looking at Finn, the sounds of the bustling ward floating through the open door. The automatic doors whooshed open every few minutes or so, a gurney would go by, and the varied voices floated in from a different corridor. Hell, he hated hospitals. Sure, he’d been in and out of the ER and sometimes he’d visit people he’d helped, but he still hated them. He never failed to think of the night they’d lost his father.
He focused his eyes on the IV bag that was dripping fluids and the plastic cup with straw that sat on the tray table along with a stack of Get Well Soon cards. Their mother looked the same as yesterday—pale, tired, but at least peaceful. “Has the doctor been by yet this morning?” he asked his younger brother. “Do they know if the tumor was benign?”
Finn shook his head. “Nope. The nurse said he will be in around ten. My shift starts at eleven though, so it looks like you’ll have to stay.”
“That’s fine,” Ben said. It was his day off. Between the two of them, they’d managed to juggle their mother’s hospital appointments and now surgery. They’d taken turns and had already arranged for at-home care when she was released from the hospital. “She looks good,” he added after taking a sip of coffee.
“Yeah. The nurse said her color is improving. If she has an appetite today, that would be a good sign, too.”
Ben stretched his legs and looked out the window. “You can leave whenever if you need to do something before work.”
Finn took a bite of a croissant and passed him the bag. He fished the other one out and joined him in inhaling the best thing that had arrived in Shadow Creek in a year. “So did you talk to Darren?”
Ben stared straight out the window. “Yeah.”
“And?”
He swallowed. “I need a wife.”
Finn choked on his coffee. “What?”
“Basically, he thinks I take too many chances and that if I had a wife and kids I might not be so reckless. I think he wants to protect Mom,” he said, taking a sip of coffee.
Finn didn’t say anything for a minute. “I don’t think there’s ever been a fire chief in Shadow Creek who wasn’t married.”
“That’s just because they’ve always been older. I’m young. I don’t need to be married to do a good job.”
“Did you tell him that?”
He leaned forward, bracing his forearms on his legs. “That and that I have a fiancée.”
Finn laughed. “That’s funny.”
Ben frowned and looked over at his younger brother. “I’m serious.”
“Crap.”
“Exactly,” Ben said. “I also said she’ll be coming to the Twilight Dance.”
“Huh. I might have a solution for you. Damn, it’s a lucky thing you have me, Ben,” Finn said, looking extra irritating. His brother sat back in his chair looking smug, like he had no intention of letting him in on whatever stupid scheme he’d come up with.
“Yeah?”
“I was in the lobby just now, and I spotted a very hot doctor who looked familiar. Could have sworn she made eye contact with me, but then ran down the hallway in the opposite direction. The view from the back was pretty nice, too.”
His croissant got stuck in his throat. Ben washed it down with the coffee. He refused to look at his brother, knowing he was going to have a stupid smile on his face. “Yeah. Who?”
“Molly Mayberry.”
Ben shrugged, like that name didn’t mean a thing to him. “I saw her, too.”
“When?”
“This morning.”
“She looks good. Incredible. Even better than I remember.”
“Well, you don’t need to remember. And you also don’t need to notice.”
Ben ignored the snicker and drank his coffee. He couldn’t start a fight while their mother was recovering from surgery.
“What’d you guys talk about?”
Ben crammed the rest of the croissant in his mouth and took his time chewing. “Since when do you ask details about conversations I have with people?”
“Since the people are Molly.”
“Nothing much to say. She’s back in town. Nothing that affects me.”
He blinked, refocusing on his mother because he could have sworn he saw her eyelids flicker. It would be right up her alley to fake-sleep in order to eavesdrop on a conversation about their personal lives.
“As if it doesn’t affect you that Molly’s back in town. She’s the girl you were going to marry, so it wouldn’t be a stretch if she’s the girl you’re engaged to now. It would actually be believable.”
He clenched his free fist in his hand in an attempt to not smash it into his brother’s jaw. He turned from their mother to glare at Finn. “Seriously?”
Finn shrugged. “Just speaking the truth. And you can’t deny this is the perfect plan. Considering she dumped you, she might feel bad or something, and you could guilt her into pretending to be your fiancée. Maybe pay her.”
He stood abruptly. He needed to get out of here because this was ridiculous. He would never ask Molly for anything.
Their mother made a sad, moaning sort of noise. They both looked at her. Had she heard him talk about Molly? She’d adored Molly. They would have long conversations, and Molly would always tell him how lucky he was to have a mother like her. He knew his mother had considered Molly like the daughter she never had. Molly had broken his mother’s heart.
Ben approached her bed. “Mom?”
Her eyes opened slowly and fixed on him. “I don’t know how long I have. The doctors don’t know if the surgery was successful. All I want is to know that my boys are happy, settled. I want to know there will be grandchildren one day, Ben, even if I don’t get to meet them.”
The back of his eyes stung, and the lump in his throat made it difficult for him to speak. Before he could say anything, her eyelids closed and he stood there staring at her, feeling like he’d failed her. He wanted that for her. She deserved that. He would do anything for her; he knew Finn felt the same. She’d raised them with love and strong will, even when they drove her insane as teenagers. They owed her.
“You will, Mom,” Finn said, standing beside him.
Ben looked over at him. What the hell was his brother saying?
Her eyes opened again and his stupid brother began speaking again. “Molly’s back in town and they’re getting back together. Ben’s going to beg her to marry him.”
Their mother’s eyes lit up and she smiled; the first real smile they had seen in weeks. He stood there, taking in the massive lie his brother had just told, and the reality that this might give their mother the will to fight her illness, and he might get his promotion to fire chief.
…
Molly hung her purse on the back of her office door, having just inhaled a salad and a coffee and changed into her scrubs. She crossed her office, her runners feeling decadent after wearing heels all day. She liked her office. It had a view of the newly expanded hospital garden and path, and in the distance, she could see the mountains. She always kept the white blinds open since privacy wasn’t a concern. She had a large pin board that was filling up with pictures from her new patients, and she’d hung some different pictures with popular children’s characters. She liked to make her little patients feel as comfortable and unintimidated as possible.
When she was in the office seeing patients, she dressed business casual, but when she pulled a night in the ER it was comfort all the way. She had finished a twelve-hour day and was now about to begin an eight-hour shift in the ER. She was a sucker for punishment. The hospital was still short-staffed, and since she loved her work and had no life, she was always ready to work extra shifts. The other reason she’d voluntarily chose this was because her work was so intense and engrossing that she didn’t have to think about her personal problems, like her mother. Or Ben. Or the fact that their epic reunion involved her spilling coffee down his shirt and him making it very clear how little he thought of her.
She groaned out loud as she sat down, leaning back in her swivel chair and reaching for her phone. She had about an hour before she started in the ER. Of course, there were never any personal messages because she didn’t have anyone in her personal life. That was fine; she wasn’t looking for any relationships. A normal person’s phone would be ringing off the hook with messages. Not hers. Who would call? Well, maybe her mother but that wasn’t saying much. She needed to focus on work or sleeping, not think of Ben. That would lead to her thinking about the way they used to be and then inevitably what had happened in the end. She couldn’t go down that road. She’d paid for therapy for a decade and was finally doing fine. She picked up her phone again and set the timer for twenty minutes. That was the perfect amount of time for a catnap. By the time she woke up, the coffee she’d just gulped down would take effect, and she’d be ready to start the night shift.
She lowered her head on her desk, resting it on her arms, and pretty soon she found herself thinking about Ben. Maybe drooling about Ben.
“Molly…Molly.”
Molly sat up with a start, vaguely aware that she was in fact drooling, with mascara stinging her eyes as she squinted at the man standing in front of her desk. Normally, being woken up by a man standing in her office would have sent her into hyperventilation mode, but on some level, even while sleeping, she had known it was him.
After a sleep-confused moment, horror seeped through her as she focused on him, and she tried to surreptitiously wipe the drool she felt beside her mouth with her hand.
“Sorry…I thought you were resting…I didn’t think you were in a deep sleep,” he said, not really looking sorry at all. His five-o’clock shadow seemed to enhance his strong jaw. His hair was dishevelled, and she wondered if he still had the habit of running his hands through it when he was frustrated. The SCFD T-shirt he wore clung to his broad shoulders and stretched tightly and then hung loosely over his stomach. His jeans hugged his lean hips and were worn in all the right places. He was basically the man of all her fantasies. Then and still now. While she…was a drooling disaster. She waved a hand and sat back in her chair, trying to look casual. “No worries. I was trying to catch a quick nap before tonight’s shift.”
He frowned slightly. “You’re not finished working yet?”
“I’m in the ER tonight,” she said, fighting the urge to smooth her hair back or straighten her clothes.
He shoved his hands into the front of his jean pockets. “I need to talk to you about my mother.”
She sat up straighter. “Is she okay?”
He shrugged slightly. “She’s recovering…slowly. But uh, Finn and I were sitting with her this morning, and she hadn’t opened her eyes yet from surgery. She…”
She waited on pins and needles. She adored his mother, and judging by the grim expression on his face, the news wasn’t good. She needed to find her room tomorrow and go visit. “Can I help? Is there something I can do for her?”
He ran his hands through his hair, and for a moment she was taken aback by how familiar an image that was. She could name dozens of times she’d seen a much younger version of him doing the same. She had run her fingers through that thick hair. “There is. You can pretend that we’re back together. That we’re engaged.”
She blinked a few times, wondering if this was all some kind of dream, a cruel dream, where the love of her life forgave her for everything and now wanted her back. Except he’d said pretend, which meant he didn’t really want her back. And even if he did, she didn’t want that kind of a life anymore. “I don’t understand,” she said, reaching for her water bottle, trying to not look as though she were wishing it was wine.
“I know. It wasn’t something I planned. Finn was trying to make her happy, and he knew how much our mother…liked you, despite everything, and he blurted out that we were back together and that I was going to ask”—he coughed—“you to marry me. Before I could deny it, she was smiling and looking better than she’d looked in weeks.”
She put down the water bottle and covered her face, because she didn’t want to reveal anything in her expression. Marjorie had been like a second mother to her. After she’d broken up with Ben, she’d also had to mourn the loss of her relationship with his mother. She never would have imagined that Marjorie still liked her. She had been positive that she would have hated her for the way she’d treated her son. But pretending to be back together with Ben, she didn’t know how she’d be able to be in the same room as him and not have her feelings show. And how was he going to treat her? He despised her.
She lowered her hands and looked up at the man who had once loved her like no other and nodded, knowing this was going to be emotional suicide for her. “Okay, I’ll do it for your mother. But…I don’t know how we’re going to convince her we’re a couple,” she whispered.
He looked away for a moment then back at her. “I’m sure you’ll manage. You’re pretty good at pretending.”
Her stomach dropped, but she kept her gaze level. “I get you don’t like me. What I did was unforgivable, but I’m not going to subject myself to cheap shots and digs,” she said, standing abruptly and walking across the room. “I have way too much going on professionally to deal with personal issues.”
“I’ll try my best,” he said tersely.
She kept her hand on the doorknob so he wouldn’t see her hands shaking. He walked across the room slowly. “That’s not good enough,” she whispered. “I have patients, I work at least twelve hours a day, and I need to keep my head clear. You treat me like your fiancée or I will walk away right now without any guilt.”
He ran a hand across his jaw, his eyes stormy, and didn’t say anything. They stood there, like strangers, like enemies, not like lovers. She wanted nothing more than for everything to be different. She wanted to come home to him after a long day, to be held in those strong arms, to hear genuine words of love from those lips. Instead, all she was going to get was pretend. “Fine. Done. There’s something else though.”
How could there possibly be anything else? “Yes?”
“I’m in the running for the next fire chief in Shadow Creek.”
She clasped her hands together because a part of her wanted to hug him and congratulate him and tell him he would be perfect for the job. “Congratulations.”
“Well, I don’t have the job. I’m up against Dan Donnelly who is in his forties, married, and a has very sensible record—a.k.a., Dan the family man.”
She stifled her laugh at his obvious disgust. A sensible record meant Ben didn’t have the same, because Ben took risks. She hated thinking about that. “So…”
“I may have stated that I’m engaged and bringing my fiancée to the annual Twilight Dance at the Harvest Festival. We will need to pretend in front of the town, not just my mother.”
She shut her eyes. The Harvest Festival. Her mother would be there. The entire town would be there, and she’d be going as Ben’s fiancée. She looked up at him. “What is with you two brothers lying about you being engaged? I don’t know that I can do that.”
“It’s one night.”
She let out a sigh, and she didn’t know if she felt relief or dread. “So, what do you want me to do?”
“I finish work tomorrow at seven. Do you have time to meet me in my mother’s room?”
She nodded. “Yes, I have tomorrow night off.”
“I’ll meet you here?”
“Fine. So we go see your mother and pretend we’re a couple. Ben…I have no intention of getting married, ever. I’m not staying in Shadow Creek long enough.”
“Uh, this is pretend. I have no intention of this being anywhere near real. I won’t be dropping down on one knee again, Molly.”
Heat scorched her body and embarrassment immobilized her as she stared at him.
“I better get to work,” she choked, opening the door wider, needing to get away from him. She was thankful she’d have a busy night in the ER because this was the last thing she needed to think about. She would do it, though. She owed Ben. He deserved that promotion. She owed Marjorie. And maybe, at the end of it, Ben would forgive her for everything she’d done. Maybe she’d have peace.
“See you tomorrow,” he said as she left the room.
She kept walking, her eyes on the double doors at the end of the hall that led to the old wing of the hospital. She used the technique she’d learned nine years ago to train her mind to take her away from thoughts that wouldn’t serve her. I won’t be dropping down on one knee again, Molly.
She walked with purpose, away from the man she wanted for real, the man who had no idea the real reason she’d let him go all those years ago. She began counting backward from twenty, knowing that by the time she’d reached one, she’d go back to just being Dr. Mayberry, ready for her night shift in the ER, and all these thoughts of her past would be gone.