Scarlet
It’s been two weeks after finding out I am pregnant, and I’m erring on the side of keeping the baby. I must be fucking bonkers because I am a lot of things, but a mother certainly isn’t one of them. To be honest, if it wasn’t for David, I would have probably had an abortion by now. Just thinking about it twists my stomach into tight knots. I think that’s why—despite knowing I’m pregnant—I have been carrying on with life as normal like I haven’t got a person growing inside of me. I believe that if I don’t think about it, then it suddenly won’t be true.
I accepted David’s offer to stay. I’m now doing an online, fast-tracked psychology course, which I should finish within a year. Already, I have quickly diagnosed myself. I am a sociopath with a narcissistic personality, suffering from manic episodes and post traumatic stress. Oh, and I’m a sex addict.
Who knew?
Anyway, I won’t let little things like that get in the way. Once I have my certificates—a lot of which, David will have forged—I will get to work on Reid, spending most of my time in Spain, but every now and then visiting David and the baby back home. As David is a CEO, he can do what he wants, and bringing a baby to work is one of them. He actually can’t wait to show the baby off as either his daughter or his son. He let it slip that he has always wanted to be a father, but had never met the right woman to have children with. He explained that our setup is ideal. No complicated romance with the added bonus of being a father. He said it couldn’t be more perfect.
And still, David doesn’t ask for anything in return, and still, I keep wondering why. He hasn’t touched me—not in that way anyway. I must admit, that’s annoying me a little. It’s been a very long time without sex, and it’s starting to make me irritable.
Which is why I had to get out of the house today and do a little shopping. It’s marvellous what toys you can pick up from a sex store. I bought a couple of vibrators along with some skimpy, sexy underwear, before hailing a cab and making my way back to David’s.
I’m not so scared of anyone recognising me now. I went blonde, cut my hair, and changed the way I dressed slightly. Even I am amazed at how different I look.
Once at the entrance gates, I pay the taxi, noticing a very apt song playing on the radio as I get out. It’s “Rolling in the Deep” by Adele. A song that reminds me of Reid every time I hear it. As I hum the song, I walk to the gate and punch the security number in. I notice straight away that my mum’s car is here, so I sneak up to the front of the house, looking in before opening the door. I cautiously push forward and peep through. No one is in the hall at least. As I push the door open more, I hear voices coming from the kitchen. I shut the door as quietly as I can and sneak to the door that leads to the kitchen, so I can hear what’s being said.
“The will was read a few weeks ago. Richard left Scarlet the house and his Ferrari, but no one can find her.”
A part of me is shocked and elated that my father left me something in his will. I don’t want it, though. I never wanted anything from him. Well, that’s a lie, but what I was always after had nothing to do with money.
“I’m sure if Scarlet wants to be found, she will be.”
“There’s been no sign of her for weeks. I just thought you might know where she is,” I hear her complain.
“Why would I know where she is? She’s your daughter, Wendy. Something you should have realised years ago.”
I have to smirk when I hear how angry David is. I never thought him an ally, but I find I’m relying on him more and more now. I’m even wanting to please him, which is always a dangerous thing for me.
“Yes, and a daughter you were having sex with under our own roof.”
“And can you blame me?” he snaps. “We certainly weren’t doing it. A part of me knows you were in love with your ex-husband still. I could never compete with him, could I, Wendy?”
“Shut up!” She seethes, and I feel the pleasure wash over me at her discomfort. “It wasn’t about that, and you know it. It was about the fact that we weren’t happy. Our marriage was just existing. A part of me wanted to be with you because of our past, but you can’t ever say that love had anything to do with it.”
“No, but you certainly weren’t complaining when I whisked us away on holiday and spent money on you like it was going out of fashion.”
I hear the frustration in David’s voice. A part of me wants to just rush in there and defend him, but I can’t let my mum see that I’m here. I want her to think that I’ve disappeared for good.
“Considering I was getting no love or sex in our marriage, can you blame me for wanting some pleasures in my life?”
I hear David sigh aloud. “Don’t you dare pin all this on me.”
“Why not?” she snaps. “You don’t even know the worst part about all of this. I was going to tell you. I had hoped Scarlet would stay longer and that we would be a family.”
“You’re not making any sense.”
“Remember when we met almost twenty-six years ago? You do the math.”
My heart starts thumping in my chest. They knew each other before I was even born?
“What has this got to do with anything?”
My mother starts laughing. “I thought my family was sick, but this takes the biscuit. I must say, I have never wished you ill-will, but I will take great delight in watching your face when I tell you the truth. Scarlet is your daughter.”
My heart stops beating. Surely what she says can’t be true? It can’t be.
“The whole time you were having sex with my daughter, it was your daughter too—you sick fuck.”
I hear scraping of chairs. “I don’t believe you. I don’t fucking believe you. Why would you say this to me? I know I betrayed you, Wendy, but this is a fucking sick, cruel joke—even coming from you.”
“Believe what you want to believe, but it’s true. Take a test if you want to be sure. Scarlet is your daughter.”
I’m so rooted to the spot that I don’t even register at first that my mum is moving towards the door until I hear her heavy footsteps approaching.
As quick as a flash, I run towards the airing cupboard under the stairs and shut the door.
“If you hear anything from our daughter, please let me know.”
“You can’t leave like this after dropping a fucking bombshell like that, Wendy. Why didn’t you tell me sooner? All these fucking years and you never said a thing. No wonder I’m doubtful.”
“Think what you want to, but it’s true. When Richard and I separated, we met, fucked, and nine months later, I had Scarlet. It’s not rocket science.”
“You should have told me once she moved in.”
My mum starts laughing. “Yes, I’m sorry about that. I should have known you two would start fucking each other, so it would have been better to have warned you first. My bad.”
“You always were a sadistic, callous bitch.”
She cackles again. “Yes, and I guess that’s where Scarlet gets it from. I suppose she got the I-can’t-stop-fucking gene from you.”
“Don’t be so sick.”
“Sick!” She screeches. “That’s rich coming from you.”
“You never told me!” he roars.
“So you keep saying. Look, I have no time for this, I have to get back to Amber. She’s torn up ever since that devil of a girl broke up the marriage between her and that scab of a husband she has. I have more important things to think about now.”
“You can’t just reveal that and leave!”
“Goodbye, David. If your daughter gets in touch, remember to let me know.”
I hear the door slam, and with that, so does my heart. I don’t hear David opening it and going after her. Maybe he’s just as much in shock over the news as I am.
They knew each other. David’s only sixteen years older than I. That means when they met he was only fifteen.
The little bitch. How dare she be condescending to others when she herself is nothing other than a paedophile?! It makes my blood boil.
After a few minutes, I hear David back in the kitchen making himself a drink. I take that as my cue to leave the house and come back in as if I’ve never been here.
I tiptoe out of the airing cupboard and march hurriedly towards the door. I open to find Mum’s car no longer there and the gate shut. I step out, closing the door gently behind me before opening it loudly again and closing it just as loudly. “Hi honey, I’m home!” I sing, laughing as though I haven’t a care in the world—as if my mum didn’t just reveal who my true father is.
Placing the bag on the sofa, I walk through the living room towards the kitchen. David hasn’t responded to me yet, and I can hazard a guess as to why.
“Where are you, David?”
“I’m in the kitchen,” he finally answers.
I stroll through, offering him a bright smile once I walk in. He’s sitting on a barstool by the kitchen island, nursing a bourbon. By the looks of things, he’s already downed one and is almost halfway through his second.
“Is everything okay?” I ask, noticing the weight of the world on his face.
When I approach him, laying a hand on his shoulder, he looks up and offers me a light smile. “Everything’s fine.”
I grip his shoulder a little, massaging it. “Did something happen at work? You can tell me. I may not be much use, but I can at least listen if you want to vent.”
David’s smile grows wider. “It’s nothing, really. But, I appreciate your offer.” He sighs, rubbing a hand over his face before grabbing my hand. “I’m so glad you’re in my life.”
I chuckle. “I don’t know what’s brought this on, but I’m glad I’m in your life too.”
He pulls me into him, wrapping his arms around me in a tight embrace. It’s not sexual. In fact, it’s more like a father hugging his daughter.
A father hugging his daughter.
The words mill around my head until I think it may explode. All this time of not knowing who my true father was, when he was possibly right under my nose all this time.
I relax under his embrace and let the feeling of calm wash over me. And in those few seconds of solace, I think back to all the times David and I had sex. I wait, wondering when the feeling to be sick comes at the thought of it, but it never does.
In fact, something else comes that surprises me. Not that I should ever be surprised when it comes to me.
I knew I was a bitch.
I knew I was twisted.
And I certainly knew I was sick.
But it’s only when David holds me in his arms, and I feel the lust course through me that I realise just how sick I really am.