“Oh, come on. You’ve never done a courageous thing in your life, Jake. Is this some kind of act to impress Abby? I’m pretty sure she knows what to expect from you by now.”

I watched my brother stand there, all limp and pathetic, as usual. He really must have thought I was just going to let him walk right out the front door with her.

“Jeffrey, just let her go. You can do whatever you want to me, just please let Abby leave.”

“It’s not that simple, Jacob. Abby is staying. You’re the one that needs to go, and if it’s not by the front door I have plenty of other ideas.”

“Jeffrey, come on. This has all gone on long enough. Just let Abby go.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me. Now that she’s here do you really think I’m going to let her go? She’s mine now, Jacob. She belongs to me. She left you, Jacob. She doesn’t want you. You don’t get the girl this time.”

“What are you talking about? What does that even mean? I’ve never taken anything away from you, Jeffrey. Besides, don’t you think Abby should have some say in this?”

“I can’t very well just let her go now…so, no, that decision does not rest with her. As far as whether you’ve taken anything away from me, if you think back far enough some events from our childhood may ring a bell.”

“What are you talking about, Jeffrey? What did I ever take away from you? I did nothing to you!”

“That’s right, Jake, you did nothing. You never lifted a finger to help me in any way. You just sat there watching and laughing. You think I don’t remember?”

“Jeffrey, The last thing I would have ever done is laugh, you know that!”

I can see it in his eyes, he’s still laughing at me.

As usual he was still pretending to care, still acting out the part of my brother, the only person I’d ever truly loved and trusted, but he was mocking me. I could see it all over his smug face.

“It’s too late now, Jake. I’ve heard all of your excuses. It’s over.”

“What excuses? What are you talking about?”

“I’ve had it with your bullshit, Jake. I’ve put up with it for years. You, begging me for help then turning right around and blaming me when things would all fall apart. And now you’re telling me that I’m the sadist and I’m the one that has gone too far. You may have thought that you could fool me, but I’ve always been able to see exactly what you think of me. If you think that I don’t realize what you’re saying and thinking about me…that you judge my work here and what happened when our father died…you’re crazier than he was.”

I could tell he was trying to come up with a response that would get him and his little slut out the front door, but there was no way I was going to let that happen.

“What do you want, Jeffrey?”

I looked over at Abby in all of her bullshit sincerity and actually contemplated answering her question. But the thing was, I didn’t actually know what I wanted anymore. At first, when I was standing in for Jake in my usual role as his dick, I thought she was a pretty perfect submissive, really. She had that sad, self-deprecating thing going on where she would do anything for a guy just so she felt wanted. And then, when I fucked her the second time, I knew I wanted her all for myself. I did the work of setting everything up and getting her here, and it was just dumb luck that the elk jumped in front of her car when it did. But ultimately I knew that if I brought her here, Jake wouldn’t be able to stay away. I wanted…what I really wanted…

“Answer her, Jeffrey. What do you want from us?”

God, I hated him so much. I should just push them both over the banister one right after the other. I didn’t ever want to have to see the accusing looks on either one of their faces again.

“What I want is to be appreciated for once, for all my efforts to not continuously go unnoticed. I just want a little bit of respect! Is that too goddamned much to ask, Jacob? I want you both here. You are both staying here! Neither one of you is getting out that front door alive.”

Just as Jake came at me I tried to push him through the landing railing that was right behind him, but because of the momentum that little bastard had when he ran at me we both just landed on the floor in front of the staircase. I held his arms down with my knees as I got a grip on his throat.

“You really think I’m stupid, don’t you? I’ve known you our whole life and I know how much you changed toward me after dad died. I can see how much you despise me now. How you still blame me!”

“It wasn’t me that changed, Jeffrey, it was you. I never despised you or blamed you for anything. How can you even think that?”

“You’re lying. Why won’t you ever admit it? You seriously think I don’t know that you hate me? For once tell me the truth!”

“I don’t hate you, Jeffrey. I could never hate you.”

“Jake, I saw you! I saw the look on your face when you watched! You couldn’t even stand to look at me afterwords like it was my fault, that I was the sick one! You knew what he was doing to me! You watched the whole thing!”

I wrapped my hands around his throat and watched his ugly fucking face as I squeezed the life out of him. It was beyond me how anyone could ever confuse me with this pathetic excuse for a human being. I watched him gasp for breath and look up at me with those sad, begging eyes and that just fueled my rage.

“I never blamed you for anything, Jeffrey. I knew how much he hurt you and I never blamed you…”

“I knew this day was going to come. That you would find some tramp and run off with her and leave me here. I’ve known all along that you were just waiting for any excuse to get rid of me. I was only ever good enough to be your stand-in, but you never wanted me around for anything other than that!”

“That’s…not…true Jeffrey. How…can you…say that? You were my best…friend. You’ve always been my best friend…”

“But you still won’t admit it! You still won’t look me in the eye and tell me why you hate me so much!”

“Please…I love you, Jeffrey.”

I grabbed Jake’s throat and put all my weight down onto it then felt something hit me on the side of the head and before I knew it I was falling backwards down the stairs. As I tumbled down the stairs, flashes of images, memories of Jake and me that I hadn’t thought about since I was a kid, came rushing into my head.

Jake…always so silly…racing cars and always letting me win…and cheering for both of us. His scared face at night…crawling in bed with me…because he felt safe with me. His arms around me…for hours…after our dad finally left us alone in my room…

The images stopped when I felt cold, hard marble underneath me and blacked out.