As she stared into his eyes, she realized she wanted him more than she had ever wanted anyone. That scared her, but even if she had wanted to run away, there was no way he was going to let her. Lynx was so strong, so powerful, so dominant… He pinned her there against the bar, and the scent of his cologne mixed in with the booze and smoke was the biggest turn-on Tammy had ever known. He gripped her chin and moved his mouth closer to hers so their lips grazed… Was this actually even happening? Was she dreaming?
“I suppose I do…” she whispered, desperate for his lips to lock with hers.
He seemed to hold her there for an eternity, teasing her with the promise of a kiss she so badly wanted but was too afraid to ask for or take for herself. A wicked smile danced across his lips and his blue eyes pierced into her own. She felt her knees trembling and she gripped onto the bar top, redirecting her energy out through her fingertips so she wouldn’t hurl herself at him.
“No Lexi tonight?” the girl on the bar called to Lynx from behind them.
He let go of Tammy’s chin and moved away from her slightly. Her heart instantly hit the floor, and she turned to glare at the girl behind the bar.
“Hey, Sasha,” he said. “No, King had to take her somewhere.”
The girl nodded and returned Tammy’s evil gaze. For someone timid and nice, she sure was feeling angry and protective over having that moment with Lynx taken away from her.
“Hey,” he said, grasping hold of two glasses of whiskey from the side of the bar. “How about we go and sit down?”
Her heart was pounding, and she suddenly had the overwhelming urge to be as far away from Sasha as possible.
“Sure,” she smiled.
She followed him through the crowd and to a table in a quieter corner of the room. Tammy waited for him to place the drinks down and let him pull the chair out for her. She sat down and he sat opposite her, but he pulled her chair close to his so their legs were almost entwined.
“So,” he said before taking a sip of his drink, “tell me something about you.”
Tammy gazed off into the distance. It was so loud in there, she was finding it hard to gather her thoughts, and she had no idea what she could tell him that wouldn’t instantly bore him and make him wish he were speaking with someone a lot more exciting.
“There’s not much to tell…” she admitted.
“I don’t believe that for a second.” He slipped an arm around the back of her chair so they were even closer.
Her mind raced. What could she say?
“Honestly, I live a very quiet life,” she smiled sheepishly.
“But you’re friends with wild Lexi?” He raised an eyebrow as if he was mocking her.
“Well, they say opposites attract,” she shrugged.
“Don’t they just…” Lynx grinned.
She felt herself blushing again and she combed a strand of hair behind her ear with her fingertips.
“Well, okay, I work as a waitress…” she began. “My dad owns the hardware store in town. My mom died when I was little so he and my brother raised me. I’ve lived here my whole life… Not much more to say.” She took a sip of the whiskey and nearly gagged at how strong it was.
When she looked up and met Lynx’s eyes, she saw something in them that she could only recognize as sadness. She waited for him to speak, but he didn’t. She was sure that she could see tears clouding his vision, but he blinked them away.
“Are you okay?” she asked as she reached out and rested her hand on his knee.
He blinked again and smiled. “Sure,” he said quickly, and then he looked over his shoulder and into the crowd.
She didn’t know what she had said or done, but something had changed between them.
“I’m sorry,” she said with confusion. “Did I say something?”
Lynx smiled and got to his feet.
“Listen,” he said, “I better get back to the office…” He scratched the back of his neck, and Tammy felt fire roll through her. He was brushing her off.
She got to her feet too, and they stood face to face for a moment before she turned on her heel and began to shove her way through the crowd.
She felt so stupid… So goddamn stupid… What was she thinking? She was nothing like those people! Of course a man like Lynx wasn’t going to be interested in a boring little good girl like her!
She pushed her way between some people and found herself being shoved back in return. The tears were welling up behind her own eyes, and her vision was blurry.
She had to get out of there.
The booze had made her dizzy, and after she finally reached the door and pushed it open, she gasped and breathed in a lung full of cool, outside air to try and revive herself.
She felt as if the whole world was looking at her, and she staggered down the steps in a haze of embarrassment and fear as she jogged quietly between the swarm of bikes, bikers, and cops and made her way quickly to her car.
She fumbled for her keys, and when she found them, she jabbed them into the lock and opened it as fast as she could. When she climbed inside and locked the doors behind her, she sighed and realized she was shaking.
“What the hell just happened?” she said as she looked at her hands. They trembled in front of her, and she knew she was going to have to wait a moment to compose herself. Her head was spinning, and she had no idea what she had done wrong or why she had freaked out so much when Lynx seemed to be giving her the brush off… All she knew was that she was so embarrassed and she would never have anything to do with the bikers ever again.
She ran her hands through her hair and exhaled loudly before she slipped the keys into the ignition and started the engine. She pulled away from the curb and began to turn around in a mess of bikes and cops as they gathered in the road and seemed to be building towards some kind of confrontation. Tammy started to panic as she fought with the steering wheel and desperately tried to get the hell out of there.
As she finally managed to turn the car around and put it into drive, she took a quick look over her shoulder and to her surprise, she saw Lynx. He was standing on the steps of the bar, watching her pull away.
She turned and ignored him as she drove off into the night. Her heart was still thumping and her mind was racing with confusion and embarrassment. She had thought that he had been interested in her… Everything he had done and said pointed to that, but then it was like a switch flipped and he couldn’t wait to get away.
She reached for the radio and turned it on just to take her mind off it all. She felt so mortified. How could she have been so stupid?
As she drove on and the quieter, darker side of town gave way to the roads she recognized well, her heart rate seemed to slow, and she felt much more calm. It wasn’t late, and she knew there were places she could go, but all she wanted was go home, crawl into bed, and forget this entire night had ever happened.
As she pulled into her driveway, she took her phone out of her purse and sent Lexi a quick text:
I’m home so if you need to stay here, I’ll leave a spare key in the plant out front. I hope you’re okay, I’m thinking of you and hope you got your answers. X
She doused a cotton swab with make-up remover and dragged it across her eyelids. She had never worn so much black eyeliner in her life, and she felt silly now for trying to be someone she clearly wasn’t. She pulled off the black tank top and tight jeans and left them in a pile on the floor. She could try and be like Lexi all she wanted, but the simple fact remained… She wasn’t her. She was Tammy, a simpler, meeker girl from a solid family that didn’t have secrets and lies at their core. A man like Lynx was exciting; he was different and a good distraction, but there was no way he was honestly going to be interested in someone like her… someone so reserved compared to all of the sin and wild ways he was accustomed to.
After pulling on her PJs, she climbed into bed and wrapped herself up in her warm blankets, and she suddenly felt better. There was no need for her to feel embarrassed… It wasn’t as if she had tried to kiss him and been turned down. He flirted with her, he offered to buy her a drink, and they just sat and talked for half an hour… Really, she was worrying over nothing. It wasn’t her fault if he’d been bored by her. At least she was being herself.
She leaned over and turned off the light and lay down on her pillow. Even though the night air was still heavy and dense, she felt a coldness inside that she couldn’t shake.
Maybe it’s the rejection, she thought to herself before she pulled the covers up around her face again and closed her eyes.
As she drifted off to sleep, her mind raced and she couldn’t shake the feeling of Lynx’s deep blue eyes on her. Even though she wanted to forget him, her night was filled with dreams consisting only of him…