When Layne woke up, the morning had passed swiftly and the sun of the late afternoon was shining through the nursery window. She felt refreshed after a rest and finally had the energy to explore the nursery in depth. It felt wrong to benefit from somebody else’s tragedy, but the world as it was had left her with no choice.
She began slowly, opening and closing drawers full of musty clothes. They probably wouldn’t be good to put a baby in, she realized. A lot of what was there wasn’t salvageable. She turned from the dresser and headed to the changing table, shocked to find several bags of sealed diapers and wipes that had never been used. She had hit the jackpot here, though she would only be able to carry a pack or two home.
The couple was stocked up, experienced enough to prepare for the worst before the new baby came. She wished she could use more, but unfortunately the house had become dilapidated and moldy, affecting the clothes and nearly everything else.
Just when she thought her trip had been mostly in vain, she opened the closet and gasped softly. A bag of vacuum-sealed baby clothes was hanging in the closet, clearly hand-me-downs from the older children. They were untouched by the elements, and beside the bag was a beautiful felt blanket, still wrapped in plastic and untouched.
Layne stuffed everything that she could into her bag and slowly unpacked the vacuum sealed bag, cherishing each little outfit as if it were the most precious thing on earth. She could still feel the life in the clothing, worn by children who had been free to play and enjoy their youth. That was what she wanted for her own child, and it was with that hope that she headed back out on the road.
She knew that she would have to hurry. Jax was efficient, and if he came home to an empty house, his worry would get the best of him. Her mind wandered to the last lingering kiss they’d shared, and she sighed wistfully. She hadn’t really expected to have sex with someone again; at least not good, consensual sex that hadn’t been initiated based on mutual need.
She’d had a few experiences on the road before meeting Jax. There had been one man she’d stumbled upon who she thought about from time to time. He had been standing naked under a tree, his lean, muscular body bronzed in the sunlight. A lot of people had been left naked and with nothing in the initial chaos, before the tribes had provided everybody with security. He had been unlucky, caught by a group while he was sleeping, probably. It was sad to see so many forlorn people on the road.
The second their eyes met she sensed in him the same, deep, primal longing that she’d had herself. She hadn’t seen another person in weeks, and it had been so long since she had been with a man that the sight of his virile body immediately aroused her. He didn’t approach her, and would have let her go on her way, but she saw the stiffening of his body as a result of her presence and hadn’t been able to help herself.
The pull had been too much and she approached him, taking the initiative to try to give him something, anything, to feel good about. They didn’t speak, or even kiss. The need must have been clear on her face, because as soon as she approached he knew what she wanted.
No words were exchanged while he pushed her shirt up so that her round breasts could press against his broad chest as he closed the gap between their bodies. She pushed her jeans down just low enough that he could push inside of her, and he held her pinned to the tree, ramming hard into her until she quaked around him. She came twice before he was spent, pulling out and spilling his seed on the ground. He gave her a weary smile before turning away and disappearing into the woods.
The memory was interrupted by a deep, guttural growl. Layne stopped walking, her throat tightening in fear. The sound came from behind her, and she turned around slowly, praying that she wouldn’t be facing a lion.
Her heart hammered in her ears as she came eye to eye with a savage, feral dog. It looked as if its ancestors were huskies, but the vicious gleam in its eye made it terrifying.
“Good puppy,” she whispered, though she knew it was no use. Her hand found her knife, and she knew she had to act fast. If she ran, the dog would catch her. They loved a chase, so she would just have to think smart and get out of it with her brain, staying aware of her surroundings.
Her eyes quickly scanned the area around her for shelter, and she saw a small hollowed out tree. Where there was one dog, there were bound to be more, so she would have to protect herself. The hollowed out tree might help, or it might corner her and guarantee her death. She held the dog’s startlingly blue eyes, knowing that if she broke the gaze, the attack would commence.
She backed away as slowly as possible, trying to make it into the small shelter, but she stumbled on a root and fell to the ground. Her gaze was broken and she heard a snarl and the scuffling footfalls of the beast as it lunged at her.
Layne rolled on her back and kicked up with all her might, knocking the dog back. It sprung at Layne again, unaffected by the kick. If anything, it was angrier. But it had given her all the time that she needed to fish her knife out of its sheath. She swiped expertly at the dog, slicing its shoulder. It lunged again and she kicked it away, slicing its throat this time. She glared down at it, feeling guilty and reluctant to harm such a beautiful animal. Luckily it cowered, retreating into the woods.
Layne panted, unsure whether or not it was safe to let her guard down. She stayed still for a few beats, listening for any sign of danger. The coast seemed to be clear and she let out a long, shaky breath. She held tightly to the handle of the knife and lifted her bag from the ground, prepared to move away.
Before she did though, she heard an almost inaudible whimper. Her eyebrows furrowed and she looked around, trying to pinpoint its source. She finally realized that it was coming from the small hallow tree where she had hoped to hide from the feral dog. She couldn’t fight the urge to explore.
What she saw melted her heart. A tiny puppy was lying in the dead leaves, clearly the descendant of the dog she had just fought off. Layne’s eyebrows furrowed. She didn’t think she had killed the mother, but if the wound was deeper than she thought, she might have run off to die in peace, leaving her baby motherless.
She debated for a moment, gazing down at the adorable little dog. She hadn’t held a puppy since she was a little girl. She couldn’t risk it dying out there alone without its mother. She lifted it gingerly and smiled as it yawned. Its eyes were barely opened, and it was light and soft.
Almost as soon as she picked the puppy up, her mind was made up. She cradled the small dog against her chest and began to move quickly. Their home needed the extra protection. A dog as vicious and loyal as its mother had been could truly be an asset. If she was pregnant, her child would grow up safer and maybe even feel less alone with the added watch dog. Although she had never agreed with the domestication of animals, nothing seemed to make more sense.
She finally made it home and looked down at the puppy she was cradling in her arms. They would be able to train it. There were three buildings besides the little cottage – a cellar, a shed, and a small barn. The pup would be comfortable in the barn, but if its mother survived would it come looking for it? She had no idea. Maybe it would be better to keep it inside so she wouldn’t be able to smell it out. Maybe she should have finished the job.
She sighed and carried the puppy with her into the cellar to look for bedding. It could be difficult to feed all of them, but if they just taught the dog how to help them hunt, maybe things would be better. She didn’t know much about training dogs, but Jax probably would.
With a surge of optimism, she closed the door of the cellar behind her and squinted her eyes, ready to seek the supplies she would need to raise the newest member of their family.
***
Twilight began to set in and Jax was hungry. He had managed to share what was left of his rations with Tobi and Sam, who had packed some but had left in a hurry. They had miscalculated what they would need, assuming they would scavenge on the way.
However, it was needless when Jax had a bag full of food, and he didn’t want to slow down and waste any time getting back home. That meant that he was anxious to fill his stomach– the hunger made him paranoid. He thought he had heard someone breathing in the woods when they had stopped to eat, but when he checked it out, there was nothing there. Hunger always left him feeling a little bit withdrawn and moody, so he stayed quiet for most of the journey.
Sam and Tobi filled the silence easily. Both of them knew that Jax was the strong and silent type, and managed to keep both themselves and Jax entertained with their lively conversation. He felt a tug of nostalgia as they moved together; very young again.
Finally, they made it to the cabin and his heart was pounding with excitement. He hadn’t seen Layne in far too long. He led Tobi and Sam around to the front door, careful that they didn’t see his bountiful garden. They had one just like it at Hex, but he was still paranoid about people knowing too much about his settlement. If he couldn’t trust Sam, it would be best to keep her in the dark.
It was true that Shark Tooth might bestow special favor on her again if she turned Jax in. Some people in the tribes would stop at nothing to climb the ranks and cozy up to the those who fancied themselves the leaders. It was a smart move, especially if you were mostly worried about securing your future.
But Sam had always seemed down to earth and friendly. She was at Hex because her mind was needed and it was a good place to be if you weren’t very physically strong yourself. The men there were taught to be fighting machines, and the women as well, though many of them didn’t like the aggression and opted instead for things they thought the women should do, such as cooking and laundry. Shark Tooth didn’t care much either way, as long as everybody was getting along and following the rules.
“Here it is,” Jax said. “Layne should be right inside. Let me tell her you’re here and then you can come in. I don’t want her shooting you or something.”
Tobi and Sam exchanged concerned and impressed glances. So they had firearms of some sort. Most of the tribes had taken those for themselves, and wasted most of the ammunition long ago on reckless turf wars that had left everybody bloodied, bruised, and angry. But somehow the two of them had salvaged their own weapon. It impressed and terrified them. Most people had to stick with manmade weapons at that point. Nobody had the resources to create new ammunition for guns. Those who had tried had died horribly in the attempt, thinking that they would make a great career for themselves in the new world by manufacturing and distributing ammo. Unfortunately for most, their brilliant plans had deadly consequences.
“Layne?” Jax called, turning the doorknob and trying to push his way inside. It was locked. “Layne!”
It wasn’t like her not to answer right away, and he shifted nervously. What was going on?
“Layne!” he cried, running to the side of the house and peering in through the windows. She was nowhere to be seen, and Jax’s heart began to thud heavily in his chest. Had something happened to her? Had she fallen to the floor in one of the rooms where he couldn’t see her? Why wasn’t she answering?
He ran around the house to check in the garden, but found no sign of her there. He opened one of the narrow windows and climbed inside, falling to the floor with a loud, painful thud. He got up and ran frantically through the house, tears streaming down his face. He was terrified and worried. He never should have left. What had happened to her?
“Jax?”
Layne’s voice, sweet and beautiful, reached his ears and he unleashed the sob that had been building up in his throat. He wiped his eyes, hoping nobody had heard him, and looked around hopefully.
“She’s out here, Jax,” Tobi called.
Jax ran to the front entrance and lifted Layne up in his arms, holding her tightly and spinning her around.
“Where were you?” he whispered, his voice shaking.
“I had an errand to run,” she said vaguely, sheepishly pulling the puppy from under the crook of her arm. Jax gazed at the little creature in disbelief.
“Where did that come from?” he asked, genuinely puzzled.
“I got bored and decided to work it off…I got some things.”
“You went scavenging?” Jax exclaimed, his features growing dark. Everybody flinched. It was terrifying when Jax got angry. Usually death soon followed.
“I was perfectly safe,” she said evenly.
“It’s so dangerous! You could have been killed!”
“Yeah, well I wasn’t, all right?” Layne said. She was starting to get pissed. “You don’t have to treat me like a little girl all the time. I can take care of myself. I don’t need you.”
There was tension between them all when the words rolled off her tongue, and although she regretted saying it immediately, she meant it. Sometimes Jax seemed to forget that she had gotten herself this far. She could handle things just as well as he could.
“Fine,” Jax said darkly, though he was clearly furious. “This is Tobi, my friend from Hex. And this is Sam, her girlfriend and the doctor there.”
“Hi,” Layne said. They shook hands and stood in silence, all of them feeling awkward for a few moments. It had been a long time since they had met new people, and for some reason it felt like it should be formal somehow, but there were no real rules of formality to follow anymore. And they were all feeling a little intimidated by Jax’s temper.
Suddenly the puppy whimpered.
“Aww,” Tobi cooed, approaching it and stroking it under its chin.
“Maybe it’s hungry,” Sam suggested, coming in to pet its soft little ears.
“I’m sure it is. Are you guys hungry too?” Layne asked. Jax sighed.
“Starving. I’ll go make something. I want Sam to take a look at you as soon as possible.”
“All right,” she said.
“Right this way.”
And with that, Jax led the small group into their cabin.
***
“You’re definitely pregnant,” Sam said to Layne, digging through the small black bag she had brought along with her. “I brought some antibiotics in case you’re sick, but I also have these prenatal vitamins. I don’t know if they will still work. They’re pretty old, but if you want to try them out you can. I don’t know what will happen though; they might not be good for you and the baby. There’s really not a lot I can tell you about it. It’s usually forbidden to procreate at Hex so I don’t really know.”
“Thank you,” Layne said. She had known somewhere deep down that she was pregnant, but now that it was official, she had real reason to be scared. But she also had real reason to be happy.
“Look, I’m telling you without Jax here because I know that if I was pregnant, I would be having some doubts. I can still tell him you’re just sick if you want to, and you can do what you want to do with the baby. I have Mandrake root if you…I mean, I won’t pass any judgement on you.”
“I’ve thought about that, and appreciate your offer. I really do. But I want to keep it.”
Sam exhaled loudly with a smile and shook her head.
“You and Jax are really brave, you know. I admire what you’ve done here. I can’t imagine how much hard work had to go into this. I hope that everything works out the way you want it to. I can’t imagine how hard it will be with a baby in a world like this. Your family deserves a normal life.”
“You and Tobi deserve that too,” Layne said. “And actually, there’s somewhere up north that Jax found. You guys should talk about that. They’re trying to build a real community, at least that’s what I hear.”
“Really?” Sam asked, perking up. “That sounds pretty nice.”
“It’s not bad,” Layne said with a nod. “Thank you for helping me out. If you guys do decide to head up north, please tell me before you go. I can try to help you out as much as I can.”
“I’ll have to talk to Tobi about it, but it sounds really nice. If there’s somewhere better than Hex, I’d love to find it.”
Layne and Sam left the little bedroom and headed to the small living room, where Jax and Tobi were eating and laughing together about old times. Layne smiled; it wasn’t often that she saw Jax loosened up. He was feeling good about bringing the doctor there and she knew his relief was contributing to his giddy mood.
“Layne!” he said, brightening up when he saw her face. Although their reunion had been rocky, she knew that more than anything he loved her. She allowed herself to smile at him and he reached out to her, taking her hands in his. “What’s the verdict?”
Tobi and Jax looked at her expectantly. She glanced over at Sam, who said nothing and let Layne have the moment to herself.
“We’re going to be parents,” she said.
Jax’s face filled with joy and he smiled in disbelief, standing up and lifting Layne in a big hug.
“I can’t believe it,” he said.
“Me either,” she whispered.
“We have to celebrate!”
Layne looked uneasily at Sam, who gave her a small smile that seemed to say, “Go ahead, you don’t know for sure what will happen. You might as well be happy.”
She let herself feel excited for the first time, fingering a little rattle she still had in her pocket. She couldn’t wait to show him everything she had found.
Now that she had officially knew there was a baby on the way, knowing for sure that there was a product of the love she felt for Jax, she felt overjoyed. They would be a family through it all, and maybe, when times were tough, they would be able to inspire each other enough that they would pass quickly.
Jax was heading into the kitchen to bring out the beer, whistling pleasantly to himself. Layne couldn’t have any, which he had briefly forgotten, but she that was fine with her. She was sick of it anyway after all the years of having it as her only hobby and friend, but the other three were thrilled to be celebrating on her behalf.
Jax told Tobi and Sam all about the community he had found up north, and they spent the rest of the night together, laughing and drinking, making plans for the future and catching up on the past. Everything felt like it was going to be okay and they all got to know each other a little bit better, forgetting that they had ever worried about anything at all.
Layne was just about to let herself relax when a sudden knock at the door made her blood run cold. Everybody stopped what they were doing and looked around fearfully.
“Did somebody follow you?” Layne hissed, her heart beating rapidly.
“I don’t think so,” Jax said, standing up and getting the rifle out of the closet. He aimed it, bracing himself as he opened the door.