CHAPTER THIRTEEN
I know I’m dreaming. A first for me.
Normally, when a nightmare happens I don’t realize it isn’t really happening until I wake up with my heart racing and my body shaking. This one’s different though. It’s like I’m watching my life on a film reel. I watch every moment of abuse happening in fast forward. I’m not sure why I’m supposed to be watching this, but somehow, I know the reason behind this dream is important. So, I stay quiet and watch.
After what seems like only moments—but must be hours—I’m standing in the kitchen of my old house. Samael hits me with the belt, and my mother yells at him from the living room. Suddenly, everything is on fire, just like when it really happened to me. This time though, Samael lifts his arms in the air right when I feel the gust of wind that made the fire spread.
He stalks toward my mother, her eyes full of fear as she repeats, “Don’t do this.”
As he passes my body lying on the floor, he bends down and whispers in my ear. I know what he says to me. He tells me I killed her. I want to turn away. I don’t want to watch what happens, but my dream self won’t allow it.
Samael storms up to my mom and put his hands around her neck. He squeezes her throat until she stops struggling. He drops her to the floor when sirens wail in the distance. With frustration in his eyes, he glances back at my body for a moment.
Finally, he turns and runs out the back door, leaving my mother and me to die.
I cry and try to catch my breath. I saw her die. I saw him kill her. He lied to me. I didn’t kill her, he did. How could he do that? Why didn’t he kill me, too? I need to wake up. I don’t want to be in this dream anymore.
I dash over to the sink in my old house and splash cold water on my face.
I bolt upright in bed, gasping for air. Something’s off about my room, and it takes me a minute to figure out what. Oh, right! This room belongs to Cassie. I burned mine to a crisp. While the fog of the dream clears, I wipe the cold sweat from my face, only to find myself soaked. My hair, the sheets, my clothes, everything. It’s like someone dumped a bottle of water on me while I slept. My eyes go straight to Cassie’s nightstand where I left a full bottle of water last night. The bottle now lies empty on the floor.
I stand and turn the overhead light on to get a better look at what’s going on. I have no idea what happened, but I don’t want Cassie to be annoyed with me for ruining her bed. Grabbing the sheets and blankets, I head to the laundry room. Hopefully washing and drying the sheets will keep them from getting messed up. If they’re dry-clean only, I’m screwed.
After putting in a load, I check the clock. It’s two in the morning, giving me time to wash her bedding and dry it before anyone notices. I race up the stairs and grab some towels from the linen closet. I spread them out over the mattress to soak up any water left on it. Luckily, most of it ended up on the blankets and me.
While the towels absorb the water, I tiptoe to my ruined room and grab a change of clothes from the closet. I’m thankful the closet was untouched by the fire. All of the new clothing Dad and Leanne purchased for me are safe. The ones hanging up smell heavily of smoke, though. A few bags in the back of the closet rest untouched because I never got around to hanging anything up, so I pull an outfit from them.
Once I have my clothes, I turn around and head to Cassie’s room to check the mattress. As soon as I step into the hallway, I run into a wall. No, not a wall, a chest. I follow the completely exposed, well-built torso up to find Caleb gazing down at me with a mixture of amusement and concern. His dark gray pajama pants hang low on his hips.
My mind suddenly goes to war with itself. Part of me wants to check for drool as my eyes rake over him. The other part of me wants to run and hide from him. He shouldn’t witness me looking like a drowned rat.
“Hi,” I squeak out. “I was just…um…changing?”
“Why are you soaking wet?” he asks slowly, as if he isn’t sure he believes his eyes.
“Well, it was sort of an accident, I think.” Shuffling in place, I try to find a way to tell him without sounding crazy.
He crosses his arms over his chest and lifts an eyebrow as if to tell me I should continue with my insane explanation.
I begin with the weird dream, how it was like watching my life on film. I notice his eyes tighten when I tell him about the last part of the dream. “So, after I splashed water on my face in my dream, I woke up soaked. I’m not sure how it happened, I think the water came from my water bottle. But I figured I should get it all clean before Cassie gets home. I don’t want her angry I messed up her room while she’s gone.”
“Gone? Where did Cassie go?” He straightens up at this new information.
“Well.” I pause because I don’t actually know. “I guess to a friend’s house? I’m not sure exactly, but…”
He storms off toward Jaxon’s room before I even finish. Uh oh, did I get her in trouble? Was she not supposed to stay out all night? Leanne mentioned she had prior arrangements, though. Isn’t that permission enough?
“Jaxon, get your ass up. Cassie’s gone!” Caleb yells while banging on Jaxon’s door.
“What the hell, Caleb!” Jaxon shuffles around in his room before the door swings open to reveal my tired and chagrined brother. “What the fuck gave you the idea she’s gone?”
“I’m right here, big brother.” Cassie pokes her head out from behind Jaxon as my eyes pop out of my head.
She slept in there?! Didn’t Dad and Leanne say that’s against the rules?
“Riley told me you left, and she didn’t know where you went!” Caleb hollers, making me flinch.
I’ve never heard him yell like this before.
“Jesus, Caleb! Calm down, I didn’t go anywhere. I’ve been here all night!” Cassie fires back at her brother while putting her hands on her hips.
Caleb turns toward me with an angry glint in his eyes. He takes a step toward me. I panic because I don’t like when people are angry, especially when I’m the target. With that look in his eyes and his body tensing, it’s an automatic response for me to take a step back and put my arms up to protect myself.
I let out a pathetic whimper, cowering low as I beg for forgiveness. “I’m s-s-sorry, C-C-Caleb. I th-th-thought she was at a f-f-friend’s house. She s-s-said she was s-s-sleeping someplace e-e-else. I didn’t know, I d-d-didn’t know, p-p-please!”
I don’t realize my eyes are closed until strong arms wrap around me and I yelp in shock. I expected physical contact, but not like this.
“Shhh, baby, please stop crying,” Caleb begs of me. I didn’t realize I started crying until he asks me to stop. “I would never hurt you. Please, don’t be afraid of me. I can’t handle it when you have that look of fear in your eyes. Please, baby girl, stop crying. You’re safe with me, I swear.”
I remain tense for a moment before reality sets in. This is Caleb. He may get angry sometimes, but he’s sworn to never hurt me. I can trust him. My heart tells me he’s safe. As I wrap my arms around his neck, I feel all of the tension from the past few days boil over. I melt into his embrace, not caring he may be upset with me still. I need him right now.
The tears don’t stop, but I’m not afraid.
“Take care of her, Caleb,” Jaxon whispers softly from behind me. “Come get me if you need me.”
My body shakes from the adrenaline wearing off. Caleb lifts me up and carries me toward his room. I don’t ask any questions. I simply let him carry me. I’m not sure I could speak even if I wanted to. There’s no energy left in me.
He sets me down on his bed and goes to his closet, pulling out a plain black t-shirt. He grabs a pair of black and gray boxers from a drawer and hands them to me. I guess he wants me to put them on. I dropped my change of clothes in the hallway, and right now, my closet seems a million miles away. I glance over to find Caleb’s back turned, giving me some privacy.
I quickly slip off my wet clothing and pull his t-shirt over my head. I stand to put the boxers on and notice the shirt falls to my knees, covering the boxers. It looks like I’m not wearing anything under the shirt, and the thought makes me blush.
I clear my throat and whisper, “I’m done.”
The sound barely comes out, but in the quietness of his room, Caleb hears me.
Without a word, Caleb comes over to the bed and pulls back the covers. He motions for me to climb in, and I quickly comply, crawling under the warm black and gray blankets. To my complete and utter shock, Caleb climbs under the covers with me. I gape at him, but he ignores it, scoots closer, and pulls me into his side. I curl up to him instinctively and can’t help the contented sigh that escapes my lips.
“Sleep, baby.” He places a soft kiss on my forehead. “We’ll talk about all of this in the morning.”
“But what about Cassie’s bedding?” I ask through a yawn. Instead of letting him answer, I continue on voicing my thoughts. “I know you’re upset with me because of something I did last night. Is that why you got angry with me about Cassie? I don’t know what I did, but I’m sorry I upset you.”
He tenses beside me. He lets out a frustrated huff and pulls me impossibly closer to his body. “No, baby, I was never mad at you. I was worried for stupid reasons, and I’m mad at myself for it. As for Cassie, she’s my little sister. Jaxon takes care of her, and I never really have to worry with the two of us looking out for her. Kind of like Jaxon never has to worry about you since I’ll always protect you. But, we always know what’s going on. She and I always tell each other if we have plans that will take us from the house. That way, we don’t worry about each other. I panicked when you told me she wasn’t here. I thought she left without telling anyone.”
“I’m sorry I made you worry,” I whisper, trying to hide another yawn.
His chest vibrates with a quiet chuckle. “Sleep, baby, we’ll talk in the morning. I’ll protect you from bad dreams.”
I think I say okay before drifting off, but I’m too tired to be sure.