Chapter 20

It was now the end of August. Almost a month had already gone by since Jake had attacked her. Shay had felt as if the events that had taken place were for a higher purpose. She had meaning in her life once again. Everything that had happened was meant to be; her moving to Greyson Falls, meeting Jaxson, and getting bit by Jake. They all had their own meaning and purpose. By meeting a man that had dealt with loss similar to her own— grief, so heart wrenching that they were both able to share and release their inner demons to one another made their bond with one another so much stronger. It was her destiny, and she truly believed that.

For Dee, it was not quite that easy. Once Shay was fully recovered and able to go home, she had to spend a considerable amount of time calming Dee down. Her best friend had been sick with worry when she had heard Shay had been in some kind of accident and was injured. They decided not to tell everyone that Shay had been bitten. They being Nelson, Lucas, Alex, and Jaxson. They didn’t want the townspeople to panic and give them a reason to worry.

However, they did agree to allow Shay to share the truth with Dee. One being because Dee could keep a secret, but the other being they knew all too well that Shay wasn’t going to lie to her. It was an adjustment for her. Dee couldn’t really comprehend what had happened or if her best friend would ever be the same again, but Shay and Lucas had both promised her there would be nothing different between the two women.

Overall, Shay thought her friend had taken it quite well when she had revealed the truth of that day. Shay remembered back on it fondly.

“Fuck Shay!” Dee had said pacing the floor of Shay’s cabin. “You haven’t even been here three months, and you get attacked by a werewolf, turned into a fucking werewolf, and get into a relationship with the hottest recluse in Greyson Falls, and you tell me not to worry?” She yelled putting her hands on her hips. “That everything is going to be just fine?”

Lucas laughed out loud at Dee’s frustration. “Oh come on now Dee. You are just pissed that nothing this exciting has happened to you in the past two years you have lived here. Admit it!”

Dee turned to look at Lucas and then walked up and punched him in the arm. “You are damn right I am pissed. Well, maybe not about being turned into the wolf part, but at least about meeting the hot guy part.” She said starting to laugh.

“Come on Dee. I’m fine. Really.” Shay said laying a hand on her arm. “I’m still the same person. And that’s not going to change.” She assured her best friend. “Besides, look at it this way.”

Dee looked at her in confusion. “Look at it in what way?”

Shay smiled cheekily. “Look at it as if you won. My vagina no longer needs to be greased!” She laughed wickedly.

“Ok. That’s definitely my cue to take off. I’ll talk to you guys later.” Lucas said laughing as he walked out the front door shaking his head.

Dee burst out laughing and grabbed Shay into a bear hug. “I’m really sorry this happened to you. I should have been there for you when you needed me.”

Shay pushed her away, still holding her arms. “No Dee. You can’t think like that. Who knows what Jake would have done, had you been with me?” Shay didn’t want to think about what she would have done if she had lost her best friend too. “I’m not sorry this happened.”

“Really.” She assured Dee when her friend looked unconvinced. “I was so lost without Ana. Jaxson and I found each other for a reason. I truly believe that. And now with me being a wolf too, there are no barriers for us to be together.”

“How do you feel?” Dee asked arching an eyebrow. “I mean really?”

Shay took a few steps back from her friend and leaned against the kitchen counter. “Amazing in every aspect.” She said smiling. “I feel so connected with a sense of calmness now when I think about Ana. The emptiness doesn’t hurt as much anymore. I am truly at peace with it.”

After Shay had recovered from the bite and had a chance to calm Dee down, she had spent the last few weeks getting to know the rest of the Avery clan. Now that she was one of them, she was brought into the fold almost immediately. They welcomed her with open arms. She got along with everyone, but she preferred to spend most of her time with Jaxson and Lucas as they taught her how to embrace her inner wolf. They spent a lot of time meditating and teaching her how to let her senses take hold and run with it rather than fight it. It wasn’t an easy task, but she was mastering it fairly well for a new wolf.

Thankfully, Jaxson had been with her for the first change. That night, she could feel it coming on. She had been restless all day and sensed something was happening within her. Jaxson recognized the signs too. He talked her through what was going to happen and then took her deep into the woods when it was time. Shay had wanted to be away from everyone, afraid of what might happen. Jaxson had reassured her that it would be fine, but she was still scared.

She felt the fire curl deep in her belly before it began racing through her veins. Only this fire, didn’t burn like the change. It energized her from deep within her core. She felt the power of her wolf as the first tremor racked her body.

At first, she wanted to run from it, but Jaxson was right there to soothe her. He told her to embrace the power and harness it with her mind. Once she let go of the control and relaxed her mind, the change was swift. One minute she had been naked in the moonlight in human form and the next she was on all fours as a wolf.

The intensity of the shift had scared her. The sound of her bones cracking and breaking was quite terrifying until she realized it didn’t hurt. It actually felt good, like a long stretch after one of her morning runs. In wolf form, she was lithe and sleek with tawny fur, streaked with silver. It glistened in the moonlight like stardust.

She reveled in the power of her sinewy muscles and couldn’t wait for the chance to test them out. Jaxson laughed at her as she tested her new form. She leaped off rocks and climbed in the boughs of trees. Her favorite part of being in wolf form was the speed. Oh, how she liked to run. It was exhilarating to feel her claws dig into the earth as trees and brush raced by. She found it even more amusing that she was faster than Jaxson. Well, over long distances. His powerful muscles allowed him to accelerate quicker and he could beat her over shorter distances, but she was sleeker and could sprint through the dense brush much faster. She loved the feel of the wind rustling her fur. She got lost in the beauty of her surroundings and of being in wolf form with Jaxson by her side.

After the first night, shifting became like second nature. She didn’t have to think about it anymore; she could just do it. As the days went by, a new sense of wholeness and freedom enveloped her.

As they spent more and more time with each other, Jaxson had finally confided in her the details of what had happened to Jillian the day she was killed. He had told her that Jillian had left to pick berries earlier that morning. She always returned to the house before lunch, but she didn’t return that day which is why Jaxson had gone out to look for her. It wasn’t too much later when he heard the screams.

By the time he had reached her it was too late. He had found his cousin Sherry crouched down beside Jillian’s body. Sherry had explained that she too had heard Jillian screams and when she got to where she was, Jillian was already dead, and the rogues had attacked her, and when they had heard Jaxson, they ran. At the time it made sense. Sherry had some scratches and bruising on her arms and legs, and Jake wasn’t anywhere near the body at the time. No one had ever suspected what had actually happened. Even to Jaxson, it hadn’t seemed plausible that what George had seen was true. No one in their right mind would ever believe one of their own could have done such a horrid act.

Shay could only imagine what must have run through Jaxson’s head at that moment. How lost he would have felt. She could certainly relate to the feeling of confusion, anger, fury, and rage. She knew exactly what it felt like to lose someone you love in a horrific manner. Your emotions run wild, your thoughts are scattered everywhere, and there is a gaping hole that is left in your heart that can never be filled. It is easy to blame yourself for not being able to do anything, for not being there to protect the one person you love so much. The fact that he felt comfortable enough to confide in her and share the stories of Jillian made her feel a part of him. He allowed her to enter his world and she did so without judgment, and he did the same with her.

Shay had failed to visit Sue in the last several weeks. She gave her the excuse that she wasn’t feeling good, or had been busy working or visiting with Dee. Even though the truth was that most of her time was spent with Jaxson at his house as she adjusted to her new self. She didn’t want to worry the woman but knew she couldn’t avoid her forever. She had planned on having her over for supper. She wanted to make it special, not only to make up for her absence but she knew how much Sue loved Jaxson, and she really wanted the two back in each other’s lives once again.