Xander

 

I watch as she sleeps. The tranquilizer is slowly leaving her system and she looks so peaceful; such a contrast to the fierce warrior she looked earlier. I can’t shake the image of her floating in the air, her arms stretched out either side, revelling in the chaos she was creating around her. She was both magnificent and terrifying. This duality in her is fascinating. I had no idea that she was capable of such power – of such destruction. None at all. I knew she was the Reborn and that her power would be like none I’ve ever seen before, but even so, seeing her in full majesty was something to behold.

Most Fae can harness one element, two at most, or if they can’t do that, they have other abilities. Transporters. Dream Walkers. Destructos – the warriors of old whose skin was impenetrable and who would take the front line in battles of old, but I’ve never seen anything like Addie. Controlling the weather, creating the storm around us that ravaged the Palace grounds. It was nothing but sheer luck that the tranquilizer hit her. I’m sure she could have repelled it, if she’d known they were coming.

I begin to understand the fear the Fae feel towards her. I hate that it’s there, that something inside of me could be afraid of her, but I can’t deny what I feel. It does nothing to quench the love I feel for her, but I feel the shadow. I’ve heard Kaden speak of the darkness in him. I overheard him speaking to Elaihn about his feelings for Addie, about how she understood the darkness in him because she had so much darkness herself. I didn’t believe it possible. But whoever it was out there, she was my Addie and I think she barely tapped into the power she holds.

I need to read the archives I think to myself. I must learn all that she can be, if for no other reason than to help her.

“Xander?” She croaks as her eyes flutter open, trying to focus on me.

“I’m here, my love. That was certainly some show you put on out there,” I say softly with a small smile as I squeeze her hand.

“I didn’t mean to,” she says, pushing herself.  “I tried to hold on, but I wasn’t strong enough to keep it locked away.” I ponder on that. Maybe that’s the problem. She keeps pushing her power down rather than embracing it – except that is for when she’s in extremes of emotion, such as with Cole.

“You’re fine. No one was hurt,” I say, knowing that these words offer little reassurance to her. She’s cutting herself up inside. “There’s a bit of a mess,” I admit. “But, I’m sure Kellan will have fun weaving his web of tales to explain it all away.”

“I’m sorry,” she says, her eyes falling to her hands as she pulls from me.

“You have nothing to be sorry for, Addie. You are learning. You spent years honing your craft with Defence, this is just another technique you need to master. Another string in your bow, as it were.”

“When can we practice again?” She asks. “I need to learn to control it.”

I can hear the frustration in her tone. She never did like not being good at something. I can’t help but smile fondly at all the memories we have shared.

“Soon, but first I have news. Kaden dropped by to see you.”

“He’s here?” she asks, a spark of hope in her eyes.

“He left again, I’m afraid, but he brings news of your mother. She is travelling with a transporter who’s a young girl so she can’t jump too often. Apparently, the Queen is currently to the east, on the edges of our borders. Kaden’s hopeful they’ll find her before they can jump again.”

“Why do you think she ran?” Addie asks.

“Because she will die, Addie. When she broke that bond, she knew that. If I was in her shoes, I’d probably be running, too.”

“No, you wouldn’t,” Addie says, fixing me with her eye. “You’re far too honourable to do that.”

There’s an awkward moment between us. I can’t help but feel that her words are too kind, and far too generous. After all, didn’t I run away from her – no matter how I tried to dress it up at the time?

"Your mother's name will be disgraced, and Queen or not, she betrayed the sacred laws of the Fae and is not exempt from them.”

I can see there are a million thoughts running through her mind. Eventually, she looks at me with the saddest eyes I have ever seen her wear and she says, “You mean like I’m not exempt from the laws of the sacred oath I made with Dante?”

I shrug. “The difference is that your oath was not sealed.” I see the flicker in her eye, and I remember seeing it before. She says their oath wasn’t sealed, that they didn’t sleep together. She wouldn’t lie to me about that, but still, her actions make me feel uneasy.

“I am sorry about your mother,” I say. Regardless of what Addie says, and what went before, it can’t help but hurt to know your own mother betrayed you, and I know she must be churning inside with emotions. Bitch or not, Eolande was still her mother.

“Don’t be – she’s evil,” she scoffs.

“Evil?” I ask. “The Eolande I have always known has been kind, which is why I am so shocked at what has happened. All through the years, she has only ever shown me kindness. While I know she can be cruel and ruthless, she begged me to keep you safe, to protect you, to bring you back to her. She loves you.”

Addie snorts. “That’s real funny, considering that from the moment I arrived, she was nothing but awful to me. I can’t put the picture of the woman you paint to me with the woman I met here. She was going to kill Sophie for dropping a tray of drinks, for goodness sake! How is that loving or kind?” She says with such venom, I’m startled. We haven’t had much time to talk of her time at the Palace, but her words cut me.

“I did not know that side of her. I am truly sorry, Addie.”

“I hope that one day, we learn the truth of it all,” she says, leaning back on the bed.

“We will. I promise you. One day.”