Selena
I woke to the creaking of rope and the sensation of swinging gently side to side. I was in absolute darkness inside a wooden box, laid down, nothing but my breath surrounding me. Apparently, starting each round in a coffin was becoming a new tradition.
Tiredness itched at my eyes. I'd stayed up much too late, plotting with the girls. Our plans were basic at best. More likely just a small ounce of hope to feed ourselves with so that the games would become slightly more bearable. I wanted vengeance, I wanted freedom. But before any of those things seemed even remotely graspable, I had to find Varick. Today I was filled the the kind of brutal determination I had needed in the previous round. I should have followed Varick before, let him feed from me. And today, if the opportunity arose again, I would.
Fumbling around beside me, I located my stake and my tablet stuffed next to my backpack. My cloak was already wrapped around my shoulders, laid neatly beneath me. I was glad of its warmth and braced myself for the cold as I pushed against the panel above my head.
Rain cascaded over me and I squinted up at the stormy sky as lightning splayed its jagged fingers through the clouds. Ropes were attached to each corner of the coffin, suspending me above the ground. But how high?
I tucked my stake into the pocket in my dress and strapped the tablet onto my arm. Kneeling up, I gazed over the lip of the coffin, gasping at the sight of a sheer cliff dropping away beneath me into the sea. Spray washed against the rocks below in huge explosions of white foam. I steadied my breathing, centering myself in the coffin so as not to rock it any more than the wind was already doing.
I gazed along the cliff but could see no sign of the other girls. My tablet buzzed and I swivelled it around my wrist, holding it to my ear as I answered the call.
“Welcome to round two of the games, Selena. When the horn sounds, you'll have one minute to find a way out of the coffin before it drops into the sea. Good luck.” The line went dead and a chill spread through my chest.
Slinging my backpack over my shoulders, I gazed anxiously around, looking for a way out. The only answer was a small cave, around five feet away from me in the cliff wall.
I clutched onto the coffin, fear twisting my heart.
I can do this.
I have to do this.
The horn blared across the island and it sounded like a death sentence. I got to my feet, clinging to the rope. Bending my legs, I willed the coffin to swing.
It swayed forward, but not nearly enough. Back forth, back forth. The coffin tipped closer and closer to the cliff, but always juddered back before it got near enough for me to safely jump.
My pulse rose like mad, pounding in my ears. The wind seemed to be trying to drag me from the safety of the coffin.
I swung it as hard as I could and became frantic as I realised the momentum wasn't gaining fast enough.
A murmur of panic escaped me.
I was running out of time.
Heading to the edge closest to the cliff, I held onto the rope as the coffin swung forward, trying to time the jump. The cave was dark and unwelcoming, the shadowy space barely visible ahead of me.
Sucking down a rattling breath, I heard the rope give above me. It was now or never. I had to jump.
Launching forward, my feet left the coffin. I flew threw the air, my arms outstretched.
My hands scraped against the sharp rocks, my knees digging into the stone. I scrambled up and into the safety of the cave, gasping my relief. A rush of air skimmed over my neck and I snapped around, watching the coffin plummet toward the sea and smash into a million pieces on the rocks below. I clutched at my heart, shuffling back into the cave.
I'd have to crawl if I wanted to move further inside, not that it looked remotely welcoming. I navigated the menu on my tablet, finding the timer for this round. Twelve hours.
Opening the map, I located myself on the island. I was on the northern coast and the area highlighted wasn't as large as the previous day. The safe zone was located on the other side of a huge woodland. But first I needed to find a way out of this cave.
I gave myself a few minutes to build up my courage then turned on the torch on my tablet. Clamping it between my teeth, I turned to face the damp passage ahead. I crawled through the space, my palms wearing against the rough stones. The dress was awkward to move in and I prayed I wouldn't have to try and outpace a V in this tight space.
The cave rose and rose until it pressed down on me on all sides. The rock turned to mud and I was soon squeezing my way up through a hole that led above ground. Rain gushed down the tunnel, soaking my hands and face as I clawed my way out of the earth. It all looked wonderfully visual, I imagined. The spectators were probably applauding the Helsings for their cinematic genius. Me, pulling myself out of the ground as if I was rising from the dead.
Bloody Helsings.
I scrambled upright at last, muddy, drenched, my shoulders rising and falling as I sucked in deep breaths.
A drone whizzed overhead and I gave it the finger, scowling at it.
Scraping up what was left of my dignity, I gazed around the barren land, squinting through the sheet of rain in the direction of a dark shape on the horizon. Trees, I was sure. At that moment, they were my salvation.
I moved purposefully forward, hurrying across the mud. My boots squelched in the soft earth, sucking me down as I ran.
Ahead, arms reached up through the ground, fingers lengthening and curling in the air. I stopped in fright. But a moment later, Eesha emerged, her lilac gown filthy and her hair plastered to her back. I caught her eye and she gave me a glower in greeting.
At once, she screamed out and slammed into the ground. Hands grasped her ankles, dragging her back into the hole she'd emerged from. I ran forward, shouting out as I aimed my heel at the gnarled fingers around her leg. After a second kick, they released her.
Eesha grasped my arm and we pelted across the land. Around us were more shapes moving in the direction of the forest, but I had no idea if they were girls or Vs through the beating rain. And I didn't hesitate to check, fleeing toward the relative safety of the trees. At least in there we'd be less exposed. We'd have somewhere to hide.
A girl sprinted in front of me, her hazel hair flying out behind her. Her dark green dress was the same colour Cass's had been and it filled me with a pang of sadness. I almost slammed into her as she stopped dead, awkwardly poised and hunched forward.
With a scream of horror, I realised an enormous wooden stake had burst from the ground. She was impaled on it, right through the chest; blood was soaking out in a dark ripple from the impact zone.
I backed away, Eesha's fingernails digging into my wrist. “Go, run,” she whispered, her voice shaking.
I turned, hurrying along more cautiously. More of the stakes were launching up from the ground, taking out girls left right and centre. I dodged side to side, praying I wouldn't make a wrong turn, that one of these horrible sharp sticks wouldn't find its way to my heart.
Rain enveloped me, the drops carving a path down my neck, beneath my dress and tracking down my spine.
A stake tore through the ground just before us. My hand parted from Eesha's just in time, the two of us forced away from each other.
I fled into the trees and was utterly relieved as their boughs surrounded me.
A weight bowled into me and I turned, stake raised. But it was Thames.
She smiled broadly. “That was crazy.”
“You're crazy,” I snapped, my heartbeat erratic from her collision with me. She laughed, her damp dreadlocks swinging about her.
Eesha joined us a second later and we hurried on into the trees, the darkness oppressive. But nothing was as bad as being back on that cliff. The screams were still filling the night air.
The rain had washed most of the mud from my clothes and though I should have been frozen, the adrenaline in my body was keeping me numb to the cold.
Footsteps rushed past us in the darkness and I flinched every time.
“It's just the other girls,” Eesha whispered, sounding like she was convincing herself more than she was us.
A howl echoed to us from afar and I thought of the black wolf who had helped me on Raskdød. Perhaps he was here. Perhaps he would help us again.
A small bubble of hope grew enough to keep me walking in the direction of the howl. It wasn't much, but it kept me moving.
“That wasn't a girl,” Thames said in a low tone. “Unless it was Abbey. She does look like a dog.”
“I like Abbey,” Eesha complained, looking to me, but I had no idea who they were talking about. I was fairly sure I'd made the unconscious choice not to learn all of the girls' names. I didn't want to remember who died. They'd just be another face to haunt me in my dreams.
After another hour or so, the forest grew quiet. No more screams, no more pounding footsteps. Everyone was now making their own way toward the safe zone.
The torch beams from our tablets swept across the bows, the dim light making the entire wood seem grey. The rain had stopped at last, but in its place was a thin mist, veiling the way forward.
Mossy boulders lined the ground with ancient trees growing out of them, their finger-like roots gripping them in their hold. I started to relax at last as we fell into a rhythm, moving endlessly on through the trees.
The ground sloped down beneath my feet and we held onto each other as we traversed the mossy stones. At the bottom was an overhang of rock with a fallen tree resting against it. Beneath it was a dry patch of ground so we moved into it to take break. I sat with my legs folded, rubbing my hands together for warmth.
“Is it worth lighting a fire?” Eesha whispered, her teeth chattering.
Thames gazed around. Her hair was sodden and her cream dress looked drenched, too. “Not a terrible idea. I'll look for some firewood.”
“I can come with you?” I offered but she shook her head.
“Na, I'll whistle if there's trouble.”
I nodded, letting her go, the silence pressing in the second she disappeared into the trees. Dropping my pack from my shoulders, I checked what I'd been provided for this round. My high rating must have been the reason for the five energy bars, a flask of hot tea, a knife and a small lighter.
Eesha let out a hmph as she eyed my stash. “I only got a bottle of water and a single energy bar.”
I passed her two of my bars. “Here.”
Her wide eyes grew wider as I waved them at her, willing her to take them. The round was only twelve hours, I was sure I didn't need all the food. She smiled, tucking them into her bag and I opened the flask of tea, sipping it before passing it to her. It was overly sweet, but still hot, warding off the cold in my bones for a while.
Before we finished it, I tucked it away, saving the last drop for Thames seeing as she was currently risking her neck to get us firewood. The crack of twigs close by made Eesha jump.
I rested a hand on her arm to try and soothe her nerves, but my own calm was short-lived as a low growl reached to us.
Eesha snatched my hand in hers and I gave her a hard stare, warning her to be quiet.
Heavy paws sounded nearby, turning over stones as the animal moved through the woods. The bubble inside me popped like gum. It was too much to hope it was the wolf I'd encountered before. Especially as I could hear this one snarling dangerously in its hunt.
Eesha was wide-eyed, looking desperate as she shuffled closer to me.
I gripped my stake in my palm. Did the Helsings expect us to fight wolves too? Were we really equipped for that?
My heart lurched as a large beast dropped into the clearing just beyond our hiding place. Eesha pressed her face to my shoulder, her body trembling violently. The wolf padded away and I saw the flick of its brown tail as it melded into the mist. Definitely not the same wolf.
Eesha seemed in a complete trance, rocking back and forth, mumbling, “Sita, I'm coming. Not long now.”
I gripped her arm, gazing into her eyes. “We're not going to die,” I promised in a whisper, but I didn't know why. Because of course I couldn't guarantee that. And it was a vain hope to offer.
It seemed to work though. Slowly, her eyes refocused and she met my gaze. Her fingers slid between mine before I could pull away. “I didn't mean it,” she breathed.
“What?” I tried to tug free but she held on tight.
“She was so small, I was supposed to protect her.”
My heart wrenched at her expression.
“What are you talking about?” I asked softly, unsure if we had time to talk. But Thames was yet to return and moving on seemed like a monumental task right then.
“The men in my town were always looking at me. Mum told me not to provoke them. I always dressed demurely. I never walked anywhere alone.” Eesha moaned in pain, rocking faster, lost to her memories. “It was Diwali. My favourite time of year. I brought a candle home from school. I told Maa I wanted to give it to the homeless man across the street. He always sat there. Lots of the men were thin in town. But I used to be able to count all of his ribs. Every last one.”
I remained quiet, not wanting to disturb Eesha from her reverie. She seemed to have slipped away, back into her past.
“Maa said no, I mustn't go out. Not on my own. If I insisted on doing it, I was to do so when Papa came home.” She shook her head, sobbing quietly. “I didn't wait. I crept out and gave him the candle. And when I walked back, there he was. The big man who always watched me. He had this itchy beard...” She rubbed her cheeks as if she could feel it. “I was only fourteen,” she whispered and my heart ached.
“I'm sorry.” I clutched her arm.
“The police don't take crimes like that seriously in my home town. Girls had gone to them before. Been mocked, laughed at. No one would have listened to me. What was I supposed to do?”
I shook my head, horrified.
“And...and...” She rubbed her belly and my stomach turned over.
“You fell pregnant?” I guessed, my voice hoarse.
She nodded, a pained noise passing through her throat. “A little girl. She was so tiny, Selena.” She clutched my hand like it was a lifeline between us. “I thought I was doing the right thing by her...” Tears rolled freely down her cheeks, shame engulfing her expression. At once, I saw how young she was. She'd seemed so fierce before, but now her youth shone from every crevice of her features. “The first night I was left alone with her, she wouldn't stop crying. And the pain of her wailing made me desperate to end it. Desperate for her not to hurt any more. I didn't want her to know this world. I didn't want her to go through what I did. To grow up in a town where men ruled, where her body would never belong to her.” Eesha was inconsolable, and I was totally lost in her story, terrified of where it was going.
“I pinched her little nose-” her voice broke and she fell forward, clutching onto me, sobbing apologies into my shoulder. “She was the only light in my entire world, Selena, and I snuffed her out.” She clung to me and I gripped onto her, horrified to my core and filled with so much pain I didn't know what to do with it.
“It's okay,” I whispered, but it wasn't. “It will be alright.” It would never be alright.
“Sita,” she breathed when she finally got a hold on herself. She pulled back, wiping her cheeks with the back of her hand. “Her name was Sita.”
Thunder crackled in the distance, rumbling through my bones.
“It's lovely,” I breathed, the image of the little girl peeling over me and not leaving me alone. I didn't think I'd be rid of it any time soon. Just like every other horror on this island; it all seemed to burrow in to me like rot. And the only way to get out rot, as I recalled from my mother, was to cut it out.
I squeezed Eesha's arm, standing and peering over the rocks, trying to focus my mind on something other than memories. “I think it's safe to move,” I breathed. “We need to find Thames. Veta and Twyla, too.”
“Why?” Eesha stood, scrubbing at her tear-stained cheeks as she tried to recompose herself.
“Because...” Eesha hadn't been in my room last night, and she hadn't mentioned the video I'd posted either. Had she watched it? Would she fight alongside us?
I couldn't discuss it here, not when secret cameras were filming our every move.
“Because they might need our help,” I finished.
Mist was pouring through the trees ahead of us and I struggled to make myself walk out into them. Slinging my backpack over my shoulders, I tugged my cloak tighter around myself, glancing at Eesha to check on her. Despite her emotional out-pour, she seemed ready to move. Ready to survive. I guessed we all had the ability to switch off our emotions when the time called for it. Even when they lived on the fringes of our minds, trying to force their way back in.
I gave her a small, sad smile and she returned it. “I'm sorry,” I murmured. “About your little girl.” I wasn't sure if it was the right thing to say, seeing as Eesha had been responsible for her death. And I didn't know how to feel about that, even though Eesha's life had been fraught with horrors I'd never be able to comprehend.
She gave me a stiff nod, returning her attention to the trees. “I'm in Naraka now. My punishment is this.”
I frowned, not understanding. “Naraka?”
“Where sinners are sent to be tormented after death.” She turned to me, her eyes thick with shadow. “Didn't you realise we're in hell?”
Ice tracked down my spine. I looked away, having no answer. But it did make me despise the Helsings a little more - if that were possible. They'd built hell from the ground up. Made themselves gods. They thought themselves invincible. And now even some of their contestants believed it.
My stake dug into my palm as words my stepfather had once spoken rang in my head. “Men built this world, not God. Men made themselves gods.”
I didn't want to see knowledge in those words. I never had before, but now I could see that, whether there was a true god or not, people who had money and respect held all the power. We were at the heart of the biggest Casino ever made. Chance was the dice and the numbers our lives.
A cry rang out from somewhere ahead. “Thames?” I gasped, shouldering past Eesha and hurrying into the trees.
Crazy as Thames was, I needed her alliance. I needed as many girls on my side as possible. And despite her entirely wild behaviour, I'd be lying if I didn't admit I was growing fond of her.
I jogged on, my boots pounding on the earth like soft flesh. My pulse elevated as the mist encased me.
I turned abruptly at the sound of a twig cracking.
Eesha wasn't behind me.
“Eesha?” I hissed into the night.
Silence pressed in on my ears.
“Thames?” I tried.
I moved as silently as I could, but knew the crunching of twigs beneath my boots was impossible to hide if a V was close by.
The longer I walked, the more the rustle of leaves and rattle of branches made me suspect I wasn't alone.
I readied the stake in my palm, moving onward as fast as I could, trying to convince myself I was imagining things.
Nothing here.
Nothing is following me.
But the air was fraught with tension; I could feel the eyes of a predator on me.
My breathing was unsteady and the more I tried to slow it, the more ragged it seemed to become.
I picked up my pace, hurrying to a jog, knowing it was useless if I was being stalked. A V could outpace me easily, but my instincts still urged me into a run.
The boughs passed me by, making a whooshing sound in my ears as I fled. I turned the torch off on my tablet, knowing I was making myself more of a target with the light. I was plunged into near-total darkness. The clouds were thick again, concealing the moon and all illumination with it.
Panic invaded my heart. I was furious at myself for succumbing to my base instincts, moving faster and faster, small murmurs of fear squeezing up from my throat.
I glanced over my shoulder, sure I could see shadows darting through the mist.
With a jolt that felt like I'd hit a wall, I ran into someone.
I crashed to the ground, gasping in fear as I gazed up at my assailant.
The breath was crushed out of my lungs at the sight of him, my heart slamming into my throat.
“Varick,” I whispered, the name passing my lips in a puff of vapour.
I only had half a second to register his bloodshot eyes and snarling features, then he was upon me.
His hands were ice, strong as metal clamps as he lifted me into the air and slammed me into the nearest tree trunk.
My vision spun, my head aching from the impact. In my panic, I started fighting back, clasping his arms and pushing. He bared his fangs as I choked, his eyes blazing into mine without a trace of recognition. But something must have been holding him back, or I'd surely be dead by now.
“Va-rick,” I managed through the press of his hands, my legs flailing beneath me. I didn't recognise him any more. The only resemblance was his long hair and lake-green irises. And even those were marred and bloodied.
In a flash, he replaced one of his hands on my throat with his mouth, holding me against the tree with his fist, pressing painfully into my stomach.
His teeth pierced my neck and I screamed. Pain tore through me like pincers were buried in my skin. He became frantic, crushing me to the tree with the full press of his body.
Without warning, he flung me from the tree onto the ground. My world spun as I skidded through the mud and mess of leaves, trying to scramble away in my dazed state. Terror gripped my heart like claws.
I clasped my aching neck, fumbling for the stake I'd dropped, despite the fact I knew I wouldn't use it. As he pressed his weight onto me again, I tried to relax, filling my mind with reassurances.
He just needs to drink. Then he'll become human again.
But I prayed his senses returned before he killed me.
Dropping my head back and squeezing my eyes shut, I let him take from me what he was going to take anyway. I'd been prepared for this. I knew he might be in this state. But the reality was more frightening than I ever could have predicted.
His knees pressed either side of my legs and his hips dug painfully into mine, pinning me down. I didn't know when it happened exactly, and I didn't know quite why, but at some point, I started to cry. I knew it wasn't fear – though I was admittedly terrified – something else was causing the tears. A dull ache in the depths of my heart.
Him. This.
Mad as it was, I actually pitied him. Because I knew, whether I died or not, he was going to hate himself for what he'd done.
Slowly, crazily, stupidly, I slid my arms around his back, holding him close. He wasn't as rough now, but still frenzied. And I was growing weaker by the second.
“Please come back to me,” I whispered.
The sky was thick with clouds and I wished that it was clear. It didn't seem right to die here on the ground without seeing the stars again. Like in the movies when your soul seems to slip away into the sky.
A veil slid across my eyes and for the first time in my life I realised how alluring death was. How peaceful.
If everything just stopped, I wouldn't have to fight any more. No more fear, no more pain, no more games.
I stilled beneath Varick's weight, my arms falling limp in the mud either side of me.
Just as my vision faded, Varick lifted his head. And oh, there were the stars. I could sink into his beauty for the price of death. It wasn't difficult at all.
A small smile crept onto my mouth and, at last, I let go.