~MIDNIGHT~
I played with the bracelet on my wrist, staring at the shiny surface of the metallic pink and midnight blue beads. Once in a while, I aimlessly touched one of the six charms— each charm represented us.
From what Kai had informed me upon waking up this morning, Elias and EliaseAnne were still in the psychiatric ward being treated for the panic attack they had when we had potentially died. Actually, we did die or so I was told. We died a couple of times and after help from everyone, we finally stabilized.
So far, only Lily and I had woken up. Lily only stayed awake for two minutes before she went back to sleep. I bet she was wondering if Hinotori was okay, and when satisfied, drifted back to sleep.
When I'd woken up and understood the situation we were currently in, I knew exactly why Makoto was hiding. I knew where she was, but I didn't want to bother her. We all could feel how depressed she was and how she regretted her actions.
I hadn't told Kai that I knew how to reach the dark place within us. How could I have forgotten when I'd been there for so many cycles? I just knew Makoto didn't want to think right now. The least I could do to show my support was check on her before I went to sleep.
We didn't need to exchange words. It was as if we were two balls of light that represented our essence in the vast darkness within ourselves. Kinda like a soul. All I would do was brush lightly against her, nothing more. That was enough for her to know I was here if she needed me or any of the other spirits.
We'd experienced this ordeal cycles ago, back at the facility and it was the hardest trial we'd experienced. Having to go through it again made me upset for Makoto, but I also felt determined to help her once again.
She'd accepted me and taught me so many things. Thanks to her, I was a spirit and could truly feel and enjoy this new world we'd been hidden from due to Blair Aspen, who we’d thought was our savior and Owner until a few rotations ago.
I continued to play with the beads on my wrist, happy to have some type of distraction. I hoped EliaseAnne was okay, but I worried about the others as well.
I'd only seen Kai today, Ryder had been in a meeting with Matthew and the other older adults. Marcus was still outside the castle and Elias and Eli being in the psychiatric ward apparently made them unable to leave until given approval.
As for Daniel, I didn't know what to think yet. In one way I regretted snapping at him. If I had waited till Heila...maybe we wouldn't be in this predicament. Maybe we wouldn't have to work twice as hard to get our legs to work again. Maybe, Makoto wouldn't be so sad.
I still felt Makoto was my other half, and the worst thing to feel and witness, was when she was sad. It affected all of us. Even I who had locked my emotions for so many cycles, only allowing myself to feel and love again, felt hurt and depressed.
I was trying to be more positive, but I was struggling.
Daniel never meant harm, but he was hurting Makoto. Maybe to him, keeping his past hidden in an effort to not burden Makoto looked ideal, but it was eating at Makoto's conscious, making her doubt if he loved her. I knew he did, but he was holding back and that was something I couldn't support.
After Samuel, I vowed to never let myself feel that heartache from a lover. That included protecting Makoto as well. I didn't mind her having multiple love interests; it made sense due to her having five spirits. But, they would have to give her one hundred percent.
Now that we were in this situation, I feared we wouldn't meet Daniel's expectations. In fact, deep inside, we felt like we would only be a burden. It was a thought I tried to ignore, but as I sat there alone in the dimmed room, I struggled to not believe my dark thoughts.
I felt like we were in a dream. A dream caused by this poison that lingered in our veins. A poisonous dream that kept us trapped and the dark thoughts were caused by this figment of our imagination. The hardest part of this dream was realizing each time I opened my eyes and tried to get out of bed, that this wasn't actually a dream at all, but reality.
I heard the door open and close, yet I continued to aimlessly play with the beads on my wrist. I didn't see the point of showing much interest in anyone other than Mako's knights, and even that depended on which one it was.
So far, I really liked Kai. I knew the others were currently busy and I'd only been awake for a few hours, drifting in and out of sleep the last five hours, but I'd at least seen Kai twice, and he reassured me he'd be back later to bring some stuff for me to do to make the time go faster.
It made me really happy.
I heard the footsteps, keeping my eyes on my wrist.
"Midnight?"
I frowned, unsure of the voice that had called out my name. I ignored them.
"Hmm. Elias did say you were shy. I should have brought Nightmare," the person continued.
Elias said I was shy?
I lifted my head up to see who it was, my eyes growing wide before I tilted my head in confusion. "Male Makoto?"
He snickered, brushing his hand through his brown locks as his turquoise eyes twinkled in amusement. "Jeez, I know me and Rosalina look alike, but we’re not that identical. I'm taller," he announced, using his hand to gesture the difference in height.
"Oh." I took a moment to think about his argument. "So...Makoto's Twin."
"Older brother."
"Twin."
"We seriously don't look that alike."
"Brown hair, turquoise eyes—"
"There are many shifters with brown hair and blue eyes. Marcus' friend Junho is a perfect example," he argued.
"Hmm. Twin number two then."
"Midnight. I'm not Junho's twin. He's not related to me." He sighed.
"Twin...One?"
"Just call me Kade, please?"
"Kade, Makoto's twin who looks like Junho."
"Sure." He shrugged his shoulders, already looking tired of our debate.
"Do you like unicorns?"
"Huh?"
"Unicorns."
"Uh...not really."
"Definitely not a twin." I shook my head in dismay.
"I said that," Kade countered.
"Mako likes unicorns. She has a figurine, unicorn onesie collection and a unicorn float. She'd like her unicorn float in here," I pondered, glancing around the plain room to see where the float would fit.
"You think that would help?" he asked, his voice growing serious.
"Maybe. Mako...sad. I'm sad too," I whispered.
I'd forgotten the loneliness we'd felt when Makoto had gone dormant for six rotations. The room could be filled with shifters, yet nothing mattered. Mako wasn't there to ramble or write to me about her eventful boring day and how the ugly bear shifter was still ugly.
Now that I could feel her presence and could talk to her whenever I wanted as a spirit, I missed those moments. I miss Mako.
Kade walked over to the bed, sitting down next to me. His thumb gently rubbed against my cheek, wiping the tear that begun rolling down it.
"I know you do. I miss her too," Kade whispered. He shuffled on the bed, lifting his legs and slipping them beneath the blanket before sitting next to me and pulling me to rest against his shoulder.
He let me cry quietly; his hand stroked my hair. When I relaxed, I began to drift off till I felt the movement of the bed and my head sink into the soft pillows. I tried to open my eyes, to have another glimpse of Twin Mako, but I lost the battle, beginning to fall back asleep. The last thing I felt was something soft press against my forehead.
"Everything will be okay, Midnight. Just have hope in us," Kade whispered.
~DANIEL~
I struggled to open my eyes, another yawn escaped me as I let the training room door close. I'd finished my evening shift. Kade mentioned Midnight was up for five hours and had a brief discussion about him looking like Makoto's twin.
He also told me that she cried for a few minutes before she fell back asleep, making me worried about her spirits’ mental health.
It made me want to rush and mend things with Midnight. I didn't want her resenting me, but more importantly, I too wanted to comfort her. I'd been taking the evening shift since her spirits were usually asleep during that time and didn't want any of them to feel uncomfortable with my presence.
Kai had informed me he'd placed a wheelchair next to the bed. Midnight already knew how to use it, but was impressed that it was pink.
When I'd entered for my shift, I'd noticed the difference in the room. Mako's unicorn float was in the corner of the room with a bunch of unicorn figurines lined up next to her bed. There was even the limited edition set Ryder had won her down on Earthala at the game stations, assembled neatly on the nightstand.
Kade had said Midnight explained Mako liked unicorns and her float would be nice in the room. I didn't think any of us took into consideration that Midnight and the other spirits would be bored looking at the pink walls all day.
Kai informed Midnight he'd get her some things to do. He notified Kade he was going to his studio to get some art supplies and blank sketchbooks and would spend some time with her during the day before her therapy exercises.
Kai had let Midnight know about the competition, explaining that we would try our best to make it so that she didn't have to participate if possible. She showed no concern, stating if she had to fight to protect Makoto she'd do it whether she could use her legs or not.
I sighed, trying to figure out how we'd fix everything. For now, I had to continue doing my part in healing her and finding a way to undo the damage done to Makoto's nerves. Kai and I had talked privately regarding the second person who'd endured a similar fate. He reassured me he'd look into it and knew what to do to get the information we needed.
Kai was someone who everyone seemed to owe a favor. Even I owed him quite a few from our teen cycles and still hadn't paid them back. If he said he'd use his connections to get information, he would definitely come back with someone that would help give us a lead.
Till then, I just had to be patient and hope my small efforts in making Midnight and the others feel more comfortable would help their views of me. Before I'd left my shift, I was able to work a little on Mako's hair; gently brushing it out and styling it in loose curls. At least Midnight or whoever else woke up would feel a little happier.
I rubbed my eyes, hoping it would help with the blurriness.
I’d had issues with my eyes ever since the incident that happened when I was younger. It was an accident, just like how Makoto had hurt Nightmare in a phase of anger not with the real intention of hurting her.
I turned the corner before making my way down the hall, ready to turn my head and take a glimpse of the private balcony. The doors were always open unless the room was in use, and it gave me a moment to see outside before I headed to bed.
I didn't have the courage to go on the balcony unless I was with someone. I'd only gotten used to Knightwood’s balcony after cycles of Ryder encouraging me to face my paranoia.
I'd tried a few times to walk on this balcony to see the beautiful landscape of Heila at night instead of through a window, but I hadn't gotten that far yet— taking only three steps before retreating.
Maybe today I'd make it four? I checked on Azriel to see if he was awake, having tired him out during our training session today before the early magic infusions. Azriel?
There was no response, confirming my thoughts.
My eyes lingered on the pink carpet of the castle, the moonlight made the carpet appear a light purple. I lifted my head up and turned to my left, wondering if I'd be able to take enough steps to get a glimpse of the stars that sparkled in the sky when my body froze.
My vision was still blurry, but I knew someone was on the patio; I could see the image of their hands gripping the stone ledge.
I narrowed my eyes, using a bit of my magic to clear my vision before my eyes grew wide; loose brown curls waved softly in the warm breeze. I noticed the simple pink dress that flowed with the wind, my eyes lowering to her legs that glowed vibrantly, flickering on and off.
"Makoto?" I whispered, my heart skipping a beat. The image changed in seconds. Now I saw a different balcony with Claire the one holding the ledge, lifting herself up and falling forward to her death. The death that I had caused.
I jolted forward, unsure now if the person on the edge was Claire or Makoto. In seconds, my arms embraced her from behind, my breath coming in pants as I shivered.
"Daniel?"
I tightened my arms, my heart racing as tears rolled down my cheeks.
"Don't leave. Don't...I'm sorry. Don't die. Please," I begged, unsure of what I was saying, but the words needed to be said. I needed her to know that I was sorry for making her life a living hell.
"Daniel...I'm safe. Don't cry."
I noticed the change in tone; the low, but gentle voice made me realize it was Midnight. I opened my eyes, lifting my head from her shoulder while she turned her head. Midnight blue orbs met my teary ones.
"Midnight..." I pulled her into my arms, crying on her shoulder. She tensed at the sudden action, but soon relaxed, her arms wrapping around me as she rubbed my back. I held her weight so she wouldn't fall.
"Why are you crying, Daniel?"
"I thought...I'd made you jump...like Claire," I whispered.
"Claire?"
I simply nodded against her shoulder. She didn't say anything, but continued to rub my back in an effort to console me.
Eventually, she spoke. "I wanted fresh air, but no one was around. Found this place and got distracted. Sorry for scaring you. Wasn't planning to jump. Don't cry," she reassured me.
I nodded again, trying to calm my frantic heart.
"Daniel. What's wrong?" Ryder's voice entered my mind through the bond.
I must have woken him up. "I'm okay. Sorry. I just freaked out over something," I admitted.
"Do you need me to come to where you are?" he questioned, his voice sounded like he wasn't convinced by my words.
"No. I'm okay. I'll come to bed after I check on Midnight."
"Okay. I'll be there if you want to talk," Ryder replied.
"Thank you."
"Always," Ryder replied, leaving our bond.
I took a deep breath before I leaned back, still holding Midnight’s weight. I noticed the curiosity in her eyes, but she stared right back at me, not asking any questions.
"Sorry I interrupted your stargazing." I gave her a sad smile, looking away.
"No worries. Stargazing is not fun by yourself," she admitted.
I frowned. "Do you still want to?" I asked.
She pondered for a moment, lowering her head in thought. "Yes," she confirmed, meeting my gaze.
"Okay," I replied, lifting her up and placing her back in the wheelchair.
"Can I take you to a better spot?" I requested.
She lifted her head to stare up at me. "Sure."
I didn't delay, wheeling her out and heading for the spot Ryder had shown me. He explained it was one of Mako's and Rose's favorite spots and was the best place to see the multi-colored stars.
It wasn’t long before the guards noticed us, but they didn’t interrupt our walk as I continued to wheel Midnight through the maze and to the clearing.
When we got there, I noticed the bench Ryder had suggested they usually sat upon to stargaze. I rolled the wheelchair until it was next to the bench.
I wanted Midnight to enjoy her first experience outdoors in Heila and not be in her wheelchair which was a reminder of what she and the others were currently enduring. I lifted her out, which from the way Midnight's eyes widened and confusion glazed over her face, she didn't understand what I was doing till I sat her on the bench.
"Thank you," she whispered.
I nodded, sitting next to her. I knew with our situation, I should have sat further down the bench, but I was still trying to calm down from my scare; my body craved to be close to someone. It may have been viewed as selfish, but there was nothing I could do about it right now, and I'd apologize to Midnight later for being in her personal space.
She didn't seem to mind our closeness, her hand that laid on the stone bench was lined up next to mine— our pinky fingers touching.
I looked to see her head inclined as she stared at the sky full of stars. Gold, pink, red, and blue, the sky was filled with so many stars, it would be impossible to count. There was not a cloud in the sky, giving us a first-class view that humans would pay thousands to see and analyze for research.
I noticed the wide smile that morphed on her lips. She blinked, a tear rolling down her cheek.
"Midnight?" I whispered.
"So beautiful. This world is so beautiful and filled with so many undiscovered mysteries," she whispered. More tears rolled down her flushed cheeks before she continued, "At the facility, the sky is nothing but darkness. Pitch black with no stars or light. Makoto would pray every day, to multi-colored stars she would imagine in her head, begging the gods would help us find out purpose. Who would have thought all of this existed? You never really appreciate something until you've experienced it being taken away from you."
She lowered her gaze and turned faced me.
"I wasn't going to jump. I'm not going to give up for Mako's sake. Makoto loves this world...loves that she's able to see life with a new perspective. She'd wish to enjoy freedom and see what was behind those mold-filled walls. Now that we can finally enjoy Mother Starlight's beauty, it's hard to ignore the feelings of happiness. I'm just sad Makoto isn't here right now to see it. But, I'll work hard. I'll work ten times harder so when she comes back she won't be sad anymore."
I took a deep breath, ignoring the doubts that ran through my mind about what I wanted to do. I lifted my hand, placing it on Midnight’s.
She glanced down at our hands, staring at them for a few moments, but she didn't pull it away.
"I'll work just as hard to help you heal. I'll read every book and search far and wide to find what I need to help restore your legs. I swear it. Let the Starlight gods be my witness," I vowed.
I noticed the soft glint of light which I assumed was coming from the back of my hand, but I kept my eyes locked on Midnight's, wanting her to realize I meant every word.
She nodded. "Okay."
I would get through any challenges that arose and conquer them. Nothing would stop my determination to make things right.