Haley

“Haley?”

Knox’s voice through my bedroom door was typically welcome. Not today.

“Are you coming out for dinner? We ordered Chinese food.”

“I’m not hungry,” I called out.

The doorknob rattled, and I heard his grunt when he discovered it locked. “At least open up and talk to me.”

I set my sketchbook aside and leaned against the wall so I wouldn’t have to shout. “I’m not really in the mood to talk.”

A thump, probably Knox’s fist, landed against the door, making it shutter. “You know I could pick the lock, if I wanted.”

“Yes, but I’m hoping you’ll choose to respect my request for privacy, instead.”

“Haley.” My name came out strangled, and I hated that I was hurting him, but I was frozen inside myself. What was there to say? Why bother talking about something that didn’t have a right answer?

“I just need time.”

“Time for what? To push us away?”

He hit the nail on the head, but I wasn’t about to admit it. The only thing I could seem to do right then was burrow deeper inside myself and push everyone else out. I knew I was being unreasonable and harsh, but I couldn’t seem to stop myself.

Needing to assuage some of my guilt, I offered, “What if I agree to watch an episode of Arrow later?”

“Fine, but if you’re not out here by nine o’clock, I’m coming in there after you.”

“Caveman,” I retorted, though I couldn’t resist a small grin at his irritated tone.

I returned to my bed and picked up my laptop, more determined than ever to focus on my training. How to move forward with my relationships wasn’t something that could be solved in a day or even a week. What I’d said to Knox was true—I needed time. Time to reevaluate. Time to develop a plan. Time to come to terms with the possibility of losing them.

In the meantime, I would become the best damn trainee Zenith had ever seen. Not only was I ahead in my regular coursework, I’d more than doubled my commitment to my Spanish immersion program. It was entirely possible that I’d chatted with my coach, Alejandra, more than all of the guys combined over the last few days. Sadly, she was the sole person in my life who wasn’t waiting for me to fall apart. Or assuming I already had.

As if on cue, I received a text message from Kara.

Kara: Movie tomorrow night?

My fingers hesitated over the keyboard. I knew she was trying to help, but I really wasn’t in the mood.

Kara: No talking required. We can skip dinner and stuff ourselves with candy and popcorn.

Me: Maybe.

Kara: Not good enough. You can’t spend your Friday night locked in your bedroom.

My eyes scanned the room for hidden cameras, though it was more likely she’d been keeping tabs on me through Theo. Not that I could blame her after the way I walked out on her at lunch on Monday.

Me: Okay. I’m holding you to the no talking thing.

Kara: Deal.

At eight-fifty, I closed my laptop and snuck into the kitchen. My stomach was audibly growling, so I needed food before we started the show. Wanting to avoid remarks about my choice to skip dinner, I quietly removed a loaf of bread and peanut butter from the pantry and made myself a sandwich.

A few gigantic bites later, I was almost finished when tattooed arms slipped around my waist from behind. Sighing, I took my time finishing the sandwich and gulped down almost an entire bottle of water before turning around.

“Can I help you with something?”

Theo’s expression was stoic. Not a good sign. I attempted to retreat, but my back hit the counter. I was trapped.

“You skipped dinner. Again.”

I thought about giving him my “I wasn’t hungry” excuse, but I figured it wouldn’t fly since he’d caught me scarfing down a hasty meal. “Yeah, I did.”

“You’re avoiding me.”

“How can you say that? I’m literally in your arms as we speak.”

His eyes narrowed. “Not by choice. What’s going on, cupcake? You’re supposed to come to me with your problems. Not run away.” He moved in so close, I could feel the heat of his body tickling my skin.

In that moment, I felt like two separate people. One Haley needed Theo to pick her up and set her on the counter. She would wrap her legs around his waist and pull him into a scorching kiss. His muscles would flex under her touch, and her fingers would sink into his back.

The other Haley needed something else entirely. She felt suffocated. Confused. Irrational.

I pushed against his chest, stepping out from his orbit. Finally able to breathe again, I found myself lashing out. “Does no one in my life understand the concept of space? I said I needed time. Let me have it.”

Not caring about my promise to Knox, I ran back to my room, closing and locking the door before collapsing against it. I’d never felt so out of control. Even when my house burned down and I was thrust into a new and strange world, I’d remained strangely calm and logical.

This was different. I couldn’t seem to wade through all the doubt and self-recrimination enough to assess my options. And I felt foolish for believing, if only for a short time, that continuing a relationship with five men was a feasible solution to an impossible problem. For one brief moment, I longed for my life back in Portland.

It was simple.

Uncomplicated.

And so incredibly lonely.

No, I wouldn’t let myself go there. Running away again was not a viable choice. I was stronger and more determined now. Even if I couldn’t see it yet, the right path would reveal itself to me. It had to.

Through the door, I heard raised voices drifting down the hall, then what could have only been Knox’s bedroom door slammed shut. I cringed at the finality of that sound. If I kept pushing him, and the others, away, would they eventually slam the door on our future together?

Maybe it would be easier that way.

* * *

Chase

The sound of yelling followed by a door slamming interrupted what had been a fairly productive study session. My first instinct was to ignore it. I had no desire to get in the middle of a Bennett brother fight. Then again, I’d been living with them for almost six months, and I’d rarely heard them argue. They were typically the bickering type, not the yelling type.

That, combined with the overwhelming tension in the loft over the last few days, was enough to make me set my books aside and go downstairs to investigate.

I found Theo in the kitchen, looking uncommonly defeated. “What’s going on?”

He shrugged. “Haley’s pulling away. Knox is pissed. What else is there to say?”

I glanced toward Haley’s closed door. “Should I try to talk to her?”

He shook his head. “I tried that already. She told me she needed space, then ran off.” His head dropped as he leaned against counter.

“I’m sorry.” Although I wasn’t exactly happy about Haley’s recent disappearing act, Theo was the most sensitive about it. He couldn’t stand the idea of her shutting him out. It probably had something to do with his crappy childhood, but I’d never asked. We were guys—we didn’t talk about that stuff.

“Whatever.” He started pacing, which discounted his statement. He was obviously upset, and I had no idea what to do about it. “I can’t be here right now. Want to go for a drive?”

My thoughts strayed to my test tomorrow, but I shut them down. Theo needed me. “Sure.”

He went straight for the Mustang, and as he peeled out of the garage, I wondered if I should have convinced him to hand over the keys.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

He shifted gears with barely restrained violence and laughed. “What’s the point? Haley’s going to do whatever the Hades she wants, and we have no control over it.”

“That’s not true. She’s just upset about the rumors right now.”

“No offense, Chase, but your nice guy routine isn’t helping.”

“I’m not that nice,” I grumbled, inexplicably offended even though I knew he was right. The last thing he needed was for me to pretend like everything was fine. Thinking of something that might help, I said, “Take the next left.”

He looked at me but didn’t respond, turning where I indicated. I directed him to a rundown building in a not-so-great area of town. A faded sign with the words “Santa Cruz Boxing Club” was the only thing indicating the business’s purpose.

Theo pulled into the parking lot, empty except for one truck. “Boxing?”

“Yeah. Ethan brought me here to spar a few times.”

“How did I not know that? I didn’t even know this place existed.”

“You know Ethan. He’s never been particularly open.”

“And look where that’s gotten him.”

I nodded and opened my door. “Come on.”

Theo jogged to catch up with me as I strode to the entrance. “Are you sure about this? We’re not exactly dressed for working out.”

I glanced at his jeans and T-shirt and my sweats and hoodie. “Who cares? It’s not like anyone is around to judge our clothing choices.”

“Fine,” he sighed, “but if I get blood on my shirt, you’re buying me a new one.”

“Or you could just take it off.”

As we walked inside, Theo muttered, “Nice place,” his sarcasm obvious.

I was in complete agreement—the drab walls, dated equipment, and poor lighting provided a depressing atmosphere—but we weren’t here for nice. We were here to work off some of his anger and aggression. When all was said and done, I’d rather him take it out on me in the ring than on Knox or Haley or even the Mustang.

A man with a scraggly beard reclined in a chair behind the counter, watching an old TV mounted to the wall. “Hey, I know you. You’re Wright’s friend. How’s he doing? Hasn’t been by in ages.”

“He’s okay. He moved to Miami for a while, but he might be coming back.”

The guy grinned, showing off a few missing teeth. “Glad to hear it.”

Pulling my wallet out, I said, “I know you’re closing soon, but I’ll pay for the entire hour.”

He waved a hand at me. “Don’t worry about it. Just tell Wright I said hi.”

“Will do. Thank you.”

“You know I have almost zero boxing experience, right?” Theo asked as we outfitted ourselves with gloves and headgear.

“I don’t have much either, but as long as we avoid killing each other, I think we can handle it.”

“Okay, let’s do this.”

As we began sparring, Ethan’s lessons started coming back to me, and I tried to coach Theo. “Lower your hands.”

He scowled. “So you can punch me in the face?”

“No, so you can see what you’re doing. And your jabs should be quicker and not so hard. You’re expending too much energy.”

“Okay.”

We kept at it for about a half-hour before calling it quits. Though we were clearly out of our element, there was something strangely freeing about boxing. Maybe it was the way I felt in control and out of control at the same time. Or maybe it was giving into the need to hit something.

“I suck, but that felt really good,” Theo said, flopping onto the floor.

Leaning against the wall, I used my sweatshirt to mop up my sweat. “It did. We should take a class.”

“I’d like that.”

Silence stretched between us, until I finally said what I’d wanted to since finding him in the kitchen. “What if she’s right to pull away?”

“How can you even say that?”

I stared at the cracks on the gym mat beneath me. “Look at what happened when people found out Haley had been seen with Knox. Think about how much worse it will be when, if, they discover she’s with all five of us. They’ll never accept her.”

“So what if they don’t? She doesn’t need those people.”

“It’s not that simple.”

“Why not?”

I opened my mouth to respond, but he cut me off. “Seriously, why should Haley care about what Vanessa and her minions think of her? She has us. She has Patrick, Kara, Jessica. Why does the rest matter?”

“I just hate to take away her chance to be normal. She missed out on so much growing up.”

“Are you sure about that? What did you ever gain from being normal? I mean, out of all of us, clearly you’re the most normal. Has it made your life any better?”

I thought back through my childhood, weighing. Sure, I’d been able to experience school, friends, the swim team. Apart from not knowing my father and struggling financially, I didn’t have much to complain about growing up. But did the normalcy make it better? Maybe not.

“Still, how can we let her sacrifice her future for us? Because that’s what she’d be doing.”

Theo shook his head. “Don’t you get it? We are her future.”

“How can you be so certain?”

“I just am. Why else would the five of us fall for the same girl? It’s meant to be. That’s the only explanation.”

I wasn’t sure I followed his reasoning, but I wanted to believe he was right. I was committed to making this relationship work, and bumps in the road were inevitable. If we stuck together . . . if we fought for her, for us, we would get through this.

“So, what’s the plan?” I asked.

He gave me a half-hearted grin. “Break down her door and force her to listen to us?”

“Why don’t we agree to give her space through the weekend? Think you can convince Knox to stand down?”

“Yeah, he’ll be fine.”

“And if she’s still withdrawing next week . . .”

Theo grinned for real. “We’ll huff, and we’ll puff, and we’ll blow her walls down.”