Ten
“Well? What do you think of cattle drives?” Cole asked as he rode up beside Antonie.
“Hot. Boring. Dusty. Itchy. Uncomfortable. Dirty. Smelly. Boring.”
“You already said boring, Toni,” he pointed out with a grin.
“It is twice boring. Maybe even three times boring. It is five times dirty and dusty.”
He laughed and shook his head. “Don’t I know it! Still, I’m glad I came along even if there weren’t the trouble we’ve been having. Hasn’t been much so far. ’Bout twenty head gone, one man wounded and one dead. We’re making damn good time, too.”
“Sí, but,” she looked at the horizon, “he is out there. I can feel him, smell him.”
“Mendez?”
“Sí. Mendez. He nips at our heels like a bothersome dog. It is true that not much has happened, but we push hard because we know he is out there. We watch more because we know he is watching. We grow tired. Soon. Soon, I think. He will strike.”
“Aha. He tries to wear us down so that we’ll be easy prey.”
Antonie nodded. “He prefers his prey weaker than he is so he can be sure to win. He likes to pick the ground and the time. He will come and we must try to be ready.”
“Maybe you should go home. You’ve done enough. It’s not your ranch or your herd.”
“I promised Juan that I would see that Royal keeps his land, that the debt is paid. Juan knew it was Mendez, and so I think I was also promising that I would see an end to that pig.”
“An old hate?”
“Very old. They come from the same village. Mendez raped and killed Juan’s sister. That was just before Juan found me.”
“You think he was thinking of her when he took you?”
“I did once, but he said no.” She grinned. “He said his sister was fat, dark, and very obedient.”
Cole laughed. “No, you wouldn’t remind anyone of a girl like that.” He frowned, growing serious. “Do you really think he meant for you to end Mendez’s career?”
“His life. Sí, I think he did. I will have no choice anyway. Raoul wants me dead, I think.”
“You sure are carrying around a pack of troubles. And, speaking of troubles, what’s between you and Royal?”
“Nothing.”
“Nothing don’t have him growling like a bear with a sore paw or sending black looks at folks. Thought you were going to tell him there was nothing between you and Oro.”
“I did. He did not believe me.”
“So you left him. Well, left his bed anyway.”
“Sí. I left his bed and I will stay gone until he sees that I am no liar.”
“Now, Antonie . . .”
“No. Do not talk about it. I will not stay with a man who thinks I lie.”
“Well, I’m not sure I’m willing to leave it at that, but I reckon I’ll have to for now ’cause here he comes.”
Antonie moved away from Cole’s side and rode toward Patricia. More often than not the girl was sullen company, but it was less painful to quarrel with her than it was to quarrel with Royal. It was cowardly to simply try to avoid Royal but, after being subjected to his cutting remarks several times in the past five weeks, Antonie decided she preferred cowardice.
“You chased her off again,” Cole remarked when Royal reached his side.
Royal briefly glared at Cole, then at the departing Antonie. “She doesn’t run from anything.”
“Runs from you, brother. Maybe she flees all those compliments you fling at her head lately.”
“Oh, shut up.”
“Look, Royal, your private life’s your business—”
“Exactly. My own business.”
“Except when it’s making things tough for everyone else.”
“And just how the hell am I doing that?”
“In a lot of ways and I think you see them clear enough. The thing is that Antonie and the twins came here of their own free will to give us a hand. We owe them Justin’s and Patricia’s lives. Owe them Patricia’s life twice over, because Antonie and Tomás were guarding the ranch that day. We owe them for saving the ranch that day, too. Our men are good but they’re just cowhands, not soldiers, not gunmen. Antonie can outdraw and outshoot most every one of them. We need them and they’ve done good by us. For thanks, you hand her sarcasm.
“Now, any fool can see things aren’t right ’tween you and Toni. Oro’s mixed up in it somewhere, too. Either get it sorted out or leave it be. We’re fighting for our lives here and these personal problems seem mighty small next to that,” Cole finished tartly, then rode away.
Cursing viciously and continually, Royal decided to ride ahead of the herd. Only Tomás was wandering that far ahead and Royal doubted he would even catch a glimpse of him. He needed to be alone for just a while.
Cole was right. He had to push his personal problems into the background. Everything their father had built was at stake. It was a poor time to let some female tie him up in knots and distract him.
That, however, was easier decided than done. He ached for her. Every time Oro touched Antonie, even in the most casual way, it made him see red. The only good he could find in the whole mess was that the pair could not be lovers now. There was no privacy and no real chance for them to find any.
He gave a short, harsh laugh as he stared at the water they would soon camp by. It was probably for the best that he and Antonie were estranged. Royal doubted that he would be in any better a mood if he had to spend night after night for weeks with Antonie, yet not make love to her. He would undoubtedly grow reckless, try to find a private place, and get them both into trouble. It was not safe to get separated from the others. Raoul Mendez was out there somewhere waiting for any stray—human or bovine.
For a moment, he was distracted from his own troubles. He studied the land around him but saw nothing. Still, Royal could feel Mendez’s presence. Mendez’s boss had to be paying him very well to get him to leave the proximity of the Mexican border. With each mile that Mendez trailed them, he made his escape even more improbable.
“But who the hell is paying the bastard?”
“If we knew that, this trouble would be over, eh?”
Whirling to look at Tomás who was just reining in at his side, Royal shouted, “Creeping up on a man like that’s a good way to get shot!”
“You always look first.”
“I do?”
“Sí. Sometimes you look even before you draw your gun. Like now.”
“I’m not so sure that’s a good thing.”
“Maybe not out here, but in most places it is good. I look, too, but only when I am ready to shoot. Then the time lost in being sure the threat is real is very small. For me, it has usually been a threat, a big one, eh? It is a hard line to stay to though. I almost shot a priest once.”
Tomás said it so sweetly, almost cheerfully, that Royal was surprised into laughing. “I’d think you’d be real careful not to hurt one of those.”
“Sí, that is what the priest said, especially since I was sneaking out of the convent school at the time.”
Still laughing, Royal said, “I think you are just a little bit crazy, amigo.”
“Sí, just a little. I think it is a good thing to be.”
“You may just be right.”
“Maybe. I came here to tell you that I have found a place where the ladies may wash in privacy tonight.”
“That’s fine, but is it also safe?”
“Come, see for yourself.”
* * *
When Antonie saw Royal approach her after they had camped for the night, she inwardly groaned. There was no place for her to slip away to, no way she could avoid him without looking embarrassingly obvious. As he neared her, she decided that this time she would not let his nasty little remarks either anger or hurt her.
“Antonie, Tomás found a secluded niche where you and Patricia could have a bath if you’re of a mind to.”
She almost gaped at him. His voice was pleasant and there was no sign of the simmering anger that had seemed to have become a permanent part of him. It took her a full minute to realize what he had said.
“A bath?” she squeaked as she leapt to her feet.
“Yes, a bath.”
“A full bath? Clothes off, soap and all?”
“Well, a cold one.”
“Por Dios, who is caring?” She dashed off to get Patricia.
Royal almost smiled as he watched her run off. When she was acting so totally female, he felt confident with her. She was like all the other women he had ever known. It was usually a short-lived feeling, however. There was no question in his mind that Antonie was fully and undoubtedly a woman, but she had some twists and turns he had never encountered before, quirks that could leave him floundering, wondering just how to move or what to say.
He shook that thought away when Antonie and Patricia hurried up to him, their arms full of clean clothes and bathing necessities. The look on their faces made him smile. It was especially nice to see Patricia in good spirits. Since she had insisted on coming on the drive he had had little sympathy with her moodiness, but it was good to see her happy for a change.
“You wouldn’t dare tease us about such a thing, would you, Royal?” his sister asked.
“No, Patricia,” he replied. “I wouldn’t tease you about it. Come on, I’ll show you the place.”
“Tomás found it?” Antonie asked as she fell into step at Royal’s side.
“While he was scouting the area he came across it. It’ll give you two some privacy but still be guarded.”
“You’re standing guard?” Patricia frowned in concern when they paused before a straggling collection of scrub pine and bushes.
“Yes, Pattie. Go on, right through those bushes.” He gently nudged his sister forward.
When they were gone, Royal leaned up against a tree and kept watch. He had contemplated handing the chore over to someone else, for it was going to be hard to stand there knowing that Antonie was only a few feet away, shedding her clothes and washing her lithe body. However, Justin and Cole were already bedded down resting up for the midnight watch, and he knew that Patricia would not feel comfortable with anyone else. He grimaced and admitted to himself that he would not have felt very comfortable letting somebody else stand so close to an unclothed Antonie. It was not going to be easy, but he was just going to have to grit his teeth and try not to think too much about what Antonie was doing behind those bushes. If he did, he would be useless as a guard.
* * *
The water was cold, but Antonie did not care. She considered it a luxury to totally immerse herself and scrub herself clean. Since it might be her last chance for a good bath for a long time, she intended to fully enjoy it.
“I can see why Oro wants you,” Patricia murmured as she slipped into the pool.
Startled by the girl’s quiet statement, Antonie just stared at Patricia. “What?”
“I said I can see why Oro wants you. And Royal. And probably most all the rest of the men around here.”
Hearing the somewhat petulant note in Patricia’s voice, Antonie returned most of her attention to getting clean. “You are silly.”
“No, I’m not. They do. Now you’ve cast aside Royal and picked up Oro. You used Royal.”
Glaring at the girl’s stiff, slim back as Patricia marched out of the water, Antonie said coldly, “I did not use your brother.”
“Ha! You were with him all the time, then you set your eyes on Oro and cast poor Royal aside.” Patricia’s anger was revealed by her jerky movements as she dried herself and put on her clean clothes.
Antonie thought the girl’s words were overly dramatic but they did succeed in making her angry. “The reason why I am not with your brother is none of your business, chica, but I did not use him. If you must throw that accusation at anybody, throw it at Royal. He takes me and does not hide the fact that I am his lover. That marks me. What does he give me in return for my innocence and so much else that I give him? Passion. That is all. Passion. No words of love. No promise of a future. Only passion. Now, who is using whom, eh?”
Patricia did not bother to answer, just grabbed up the bucket she had put her dirty clothes in to soak and marched away. Antonie cursed and rinsed the soap out of her hair. She was still annoyed when, a few minutes later, she emerged from the water and began to dry off. The girl had almost succeeded in ruining the pleasure of a bath.
Just as she tugged on her drawers, Antonie felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand on end. Inwardly, she cursed fluently as she realized that she had not been on her guard. She saw her knife and reached for it, only to have a booted foot reach it before she could, her wrists neatly lassoed. Even as she opened her mouth to call for Royal, a grubby hand was closed over it and another painfully gripped her hair, twisting until she was forced to her knees.
She stared up into the face of the man who crouched over her, grinning in a way that chilled her blood. It was Jesu Miller, a half-Anglo, half-Mexican who went to vicious extremes to win Raoul’s favor. Antonie searched her mind frantically for some way to get loose, or to at least make enough noise to draw Royal’s attention.
* * *
Royal straightened up from his relaxed slouch when Patricia marched out of the bushes. “Where’s Antonie?”
“Just finishing up.” Patricia paused when it was clear that Royal was staying near the pool. “Well?”
“Well what?”
“Aren’t you going to walk me back to the camp?”
“I’m waiting for Antonie.”
“Oh, of course. Wait for Antonie. Everybody else does,” Patricia said darkly as she stomped away.
Trying to puzzle out his sister’s mood, Royal watched her until she reached the camp. While in plain sight of the men in the camp, Patricia did not really need a guard. By the time she was back in camp, he gave up trying to figure out what was wrong with her and turned his attention back to guarding and waiting for Antonie.
Several long moments passed with no sight or sound of her. His stomach began to knot with tension as he waited. Finally, he decided that preserving her modesty was not worth ignoring the sense of danger that had come over him.
Cautiously, he crept forward. To avoid making much noise, he went through the covering brush on his stomach. He briefly mused that he was going to feel like a fool if she was all right. Wryly he admitted to himself that there was truth in the old adage that it was better to be safe than sorry.
When the clearing first came into view, he found himself struggling against acting immediately and rashly. The sight of Antonie half-dressed and caught firmly by a leering man had him aching to use his gun. It took him a moment to clear the fury from his brain enough to see that he had a real chance of hitting Antonie as well, for she was between him and her captor. He was going to have to be patient and wait for a clear shot.
“There, Juan’s child,” Jesu sneered as he removed his hand then quickly gagged her, “now I can take you to Raoul. Ah, how he will praise Jesu for giving him this prize.”
Antonie bit back a moan as he used her hair to pull her to her feet. She suddenly realized that she had a chance of escape now, however small. Before he could step out of reach or move behind her, she brought her knee up hard into his groin. He gave a soft cry of agony and doubled over. Using her bound hands as a fist, she swung at his head. As her fist came down, she caught the fleeting glint of a knife blade as he pulled the weapon from his boot. With a grunt, he fell forward, facedown on the ground. She hesitated to flee when she saw his body give a convulsive spasm then lie ominously still.
Hearing a sound, she whirled around expecting a compatriot of Jesu’s. She closed her eyes briefly in relief when she saw Royal. When he cautiously turned Jesu over, Antonie gasped behind her gag. The man had fallen on the knife he had drawn. The weapon he had meant to use on her had neatly ended his own life.
“I should’ve known you could take care of yourself,” Royal said as he undid her bonds. “Who is it? Do you know?”
“Sí. Jesu Miller. He was loco.”
She moved back to the water and rinsed her mouth to remove the taste of the filthy gag. It had been too close. Hearing Royal drag the body nearer to the undergrowth, she shivered. Jesu had been right. Raoul would have praised him highly. Antonie thanked God that Raoul would be disappointed this time.
“It was close,” Royal said quietly as he moved back to her side.
“Sí. Very close.”
“If Raoul got hold of you, he would kill you.”
“Ah, sí, he would kill me.” She decided it was not necessary to tell him about Raoul’s unique ways of killing his enemies.
Grasping her by the shoulders, Royal asked, “Are you sure you’re all right?”
“I am not hurt.”
The mere touch of his hands made her tremble, desire careening through her body. It had been over a month since they had made love, but she was a little puzzled at how desperate she was to hold him and be held by him. She was also a little afraid and tried to pull away from him. His grip tightened and when she met his gaze, she knew he had seen her need. As he lowered his mouth to hers the only protest she could manage was a somewhat frantic shaking of her head. He neatly stopped that by cupping her face in his hands and even that meek protest died the moment his mouth covered hers. She lost all urge to resist him as he hungrily kissed her and became an equal partner in the fierce coupling that ensued.
Her body still trembling faintly from the force of her release, Antonie stared dazedly at the man sprawled in her arms. They had not even bothered to get fully naked. His shirt was undone and her drawers were off but nothing else. It had been so fast and furious that she could remember little of it. However, as he eased the intimacy of their embrace, she had the chilling feeling that it had been a mistake.
“Can Oro give you that, Antonie?”
Cursing fluently, Antonie abruptly rose and started to dress. She should have fought whatever had driven her to go so mad in his arms. Instead, she had gone down as easily as any round-heeled piece of calico.
“Antonie, dammit,” Royal struggled to straighten out his clothing, “will you calm down?”
“I am supposed to take this insult with a smile? Let you call me a puta to my face?”
“I didn’t call you a whore. You aren’t being reasonable.” He reached for her but she slapped his hand away.
“Oro is not my lover.”
“Well, I know you two haven’t been together on the drive,” he began.
“Por Dios, you do not listen. This was a mistake. It will not happen again. To lie with a man who thinks me a liar is to be no better than a puta.”
He cursed when she hurried away. The chance for a reconciliation had been in his hands and he had let it slip away. He should never have mentioned Oro’s name, but the man was foremost in his thoughts at the moment.
As he made a quick check of the clearing to be sure nothing was left but the body, he thought about how adamant she was in her denial of a love affair with Oro. That she did not lie was clearly a strong point of pride with her. Slowly he began to wonder if he was wrong. She had never lied to him before. It was very probable that she was not lying now. As he started back to camp, he promised himself that he would strive to quell his possessive anger and look at things more closely.
* * *
“Such a dark face,” Tomás murmured as he sat down next to Antonie, “and so all by yourself. You sit this far away from the others because you are afraid the gun you clean will go off, eh?”
Antonie smiled crookedly and shook her head. “I had to do some thinking.”
“What troubles you, chica? Talk to me. Sometimes other eyes can see the problem clearer.”
Taking a deep breath and silently cursing the blush that flooded her face, she said softly, “I made love with Royal by a corpse.”
“Ah. Jesu will be sorry he missed it. I made love beside a live husband once.”
She was briefly diverted and surprised into a laugh. “How could you do that?”
“As I walked by this woman’s house, she called to me, invited me to pleasure her as I had done before. I went to her window but I saw her husband in the bed and suggested that perhaps this was not a good time.”
“Very wise.”
“Sí, but she said he was dead drunk, that nothing could wake him. She persuaded me to come in. Well, there I was going about my business when I see that her husband is awake. But, instead of killing me, he was inspired by my skill. He pushed me out of bed and took my place with his wife. I decided I would let them have some privacy and left.”
“You are going to get shot one of these days,” she managed to say as she laughed.
“Only the earth lives forever.” He shook his head when the troubled look returned to her face. “I did not divert you enough.”
“No. How could I do that? It is disgusting. Such disrespect for the dead.”
“No, querida, and the dead like Jesu deserve no respect. You cared nothing for him so you were not mocking your grief.”
“I don’t know, Tomás. To do that with the dead only a few feet away,” she whispered, shock evident in her voice.
“Maybe that is why you did it.”
“That makes no sense, amigo.”
“Sí, it does. You faced death. You knew it and Royal knew it. What better way to prove to yourselves that you are alive?”
“You think that is why we acted so?”
“Some of the why. Maybe you would have only thought about it, except you have been apart for a long time. Sailors come home having fought the sea and won and they find a woman quick. Soldiers can love their women before they go to a battle, yet come home even a few hours later and have to have them again. They have survived and they want to prove it.
“I think, too, that the violence can be part of it. If there is a woman near the battle, she will probably be raped. How can a man take a woman at such a time, you wonder? When you fight, you face death, the blood races, eh?”
“Like it does when you’re loving someone,” Antonie said quietly.
“Sí. I am no rapist, but the times I have fought and faced death, if there was a willing woman near, I would have taken her even if I had needed to push the dead aside to make room. So? You and Royal are together again?”
“No. Only for that moment. He still thinks I lie when I say Oro is not my lover.”
“Poor little one. And you cannot ignore that?”
“I will not lie with a man who thinks me a liar.”
“That I can understand, but think on it well, chica. You are losing time with your man. You are tossing away chances to pull more than a fever from him. Be very sure that the price you are paying is not too high. I think that somewhere there has to be a compromise.”