Chapter Nineteen
Ryan
I was enjoying waking up with Blaire next to me. After an afternoon of sex, and an evening of hot dogs and milkshakes, we’d fallen into bed early. Reed and Trinity had enjoyed the dinner that we had brought home for them and the four of us had enjoyed a nice evening together. I lived alone and spent most nights eating by myself. Every now and again I’d meet a girl, and I’d spend a bit of time with her. But never in the way that I was spending time with Blaire. And being with Reed and Trinity too was a nice addition. Had I forgotten how good it was to have people that I liked around me? I hadn’t visited Trinity in way too long. Had I forgotten what it was like to be around family? I gave Blaire a little kiss on the forehead and smiled at her.
“Morning, Sunny.”
She smiled. “Good morning. Sleep well?”
“Yeah. I think I was in some sort of food coma, though.”
She laughed. “I cannot believe we had hot dogs for lunch and for dinner. And you want to know something crazy?”
“What’s that?”
“I could so easily have hot dogs again today. That place is addictive. I’ve decided that I don’t want them to open up a branch in Los Angeles.”
“Oh, that’s such a pity,” I said. “I already had the whole thing organized with the owner as a surprise to you. I’ll have to call them to cancel it now.”
She sat up quickly. “What? Are you serious? No, don’t cancel.”
I chuckled. “I’m just kidding! When would I have had the time to organize something like that? But now I know where you really stand on the situation.”
She punched me in the arm. “You’re cruel. I actually got excited for a second there.”
“You’re cute. I had no idea you’d feel this way about a hot dog.”
She chuckled. “It’s not just any hot dog. We both know that. Come on, let’s go get some breakfast so I can get my mind off it.”
The moment we walked into the main house, Trinity came running up to us.
“Guess what? Guess what? GUESS WHAT?”
We all laughed at her enthusiasm. “Let me guess . . . you’re getting a brand new car today?”
“No!”
“You’re going to cut all your hair off?”
“No!” she said and giggled.
“You’re going to turn into a mushroom?”
“No!”
“Okay, I give up. Tell me.”
“I’m not going to school today!”
“Really? You lucky girl. So, what are you going to do today?”
“Follow Daddy around!” she said and laughed. “He said I could come with him to his office.”
“I’m also going to Daddy’s office,” I said.
“You too? Are we all going?” she said in excitement.
I wasn’t sure that it was such a good idea to have Trinity in the office with him. I knew how busy he was, but, clearly, he had given in to her pleas that day.
“Where’s Linda today?” I asked.
“She couldn’t come in today, unfortunately. She called me early this morning to let me know. And I don’t have time to get Trinity from school later so I just said she could come along with me. I don’t think she realizes just how boring it’s going to be.”
“It’s not going to be boring. It will be fun. I can be a doctor for the day too. I can help all the patients get better,” Trinity said.
We all knew it was a bad idea, but nobody knew what to say. Until Blaire came to the rescue.
“I have an idea,” Blaire said suddenly, and we all turned to look at her. “Why don’t I look after Trinity this morning? Ryan, I know you have an appointment with Reed this morning, and it’s pointless us all coming along. And that way I get to spend some time with Trinity. What do you think?”
“YES! Yes, yes, yes!” Trinity shouted. “Oh please, Daddy. Can I stay home?”
Reed laughed. “Oh, now you want to stay home?” he looked up at Blaire. “Are you sure you don’t mind?”
“Of course not. I think it will be fun,” Blaire said.
“It will be fun,” Trinity said.
“Thank you, Blaire. That’s very nice of you. And that will be a huge weight off my shoulders today.”
“YAY!” Trinity yelled.
I looked at Blaire and smiled at her. “Thank you,” I mouthed, and she grinned back at me.
I couldn’t believe how nice Blaire was to make that suggestion. I watched the two of them talking about what they were going to do that morning, and I couldn’t help but feel a strange feeling come over me. Was I falling for her?
“How would you like your eggs?” Reed asked, and I snapped out of my reverie.
“Oh, whatever is easiest for you. Why not scramble them all?”
“If you don’t mind?”
“I don’t.”
“I don’t, either,” Blaire said.
“Oh, you guys are amazing,” Reed said. “You’re making my life a lot easier.”
“You know,” Blaire said. “Not that long ago I just ate fruit for breakfast.”
“Really?” I said. As far as I had known, she’d always had a healthy appetite. “That’s a boring breakfast. What changed?”
“At first it was being in Wyoming when I did that cowboy movie with your brother. Everyone there works very hard so because of that eat big wholesome meals. I sort of got used to it. I came back to Los Angeles with that mindset. I slowly started going back to my old ways, but lately, I just haven’t been caring so much about it. I sort of don’t see the point anymore. Anyway, I run almost every day, and I really like my food.”
I beamed at her. “This is way better. There’s nothing worse than someone that won’t eat.”
“Well, that’s the problem with being an actress. We all want to look a certain way because we have the world watching our every move. But we forget that we are also supposed to be a role model for everyone around us. Starvation is not being a role model. Maybe it’s easier for me because I’m not such a well-known actress, but I figured it would be good to change my mindset now.”
“I like spaghetti,” Trinity said and we all giggled.
“Good, keep it that way,” Blaire said to her.
We sat together eating scrambled eggs on toast, and then when we were done, I got up to leave with Reed. I gave Trinity a big hug and told her to be good.
“Are you going to be nice to Blaire?” I asked her.
She seemed to take the question very seriously. “Yes,” she nodded. “I am going to be nice to her. We’re going to have so much fun!”
I laughed. “I’m sure you are. Thanks again, Blaire.”
“No problem. See you boys later.”
“Yeah, bye boys,” Trinity said.
I walked over to the spare car, but Reed stopped me. “Nah, come with me.”
“Oh, but I don’t think I’ll stay all day,” I said to him. I couldn’t of anything worse than spending the entire day with Reed at work, and I wasn’t sure why he would even want me to.
He laughed. “I know. But I don’t have any appointments for this afternoon. So once we’re all done, I just have a tiny bit of paperwork to do, and then we can come back here.”
“Oh, that’s great. I bet Trinity is going to be happy.”
“Yeah, more than likely. Although she doesn’t seem to mind me being at work now that she has Blaire around. But yeah, she’ll be happy. Sometimes I don’t get to spend as much time with her as I would like. It’s a fairly demanding job. I feel so bad sometimes. But I do the best that I can.”
“Don’t beat yourself up about it, Reed. You’re doing an amazing job. She’s such a good girl. She’s hilarious too. She must get that from me.”
He laughed. “Oh, so are you claiming to be the funny one in the family then?”
“Well, it’s certainly not Ian.”
He burst out laughing. “That’s true. Although, I hear he’s different these days.”
“Apparently so. He’s heading the motorcycle club. Can you believe it? Can you even imagine someone like Ian standing up and talking to a crowd full of people?”
Reed shook his head. “I can’t imagine it. Although, I guess it’s not just any crowd. It’s a crowd of people who all love motorcycles as much as he did. I guess that’s the difference.”
“Yeah, that’s true. Well, I’m happy for him. Like I said before, he’s a good guy.”
“Yeah, I’m happy for him too. I always knew he needed a bit of direction. Okay, well, here we are. Let’s go in.”
I marveled at how different Reed’s life was from mine. The moment I stepped inside the building, I wanted to run back out, whereas when I got inside the training facility, I never wanted to leave. But I supposed that was the difference between working here and being a patient.
“So, you’ve been suffering from headaches?”
“Uh yeah, but it’s probably nothing. I mean, it’s not every day,” I said. Although, that wasn’t exactly true. Lately, it had been every day. Sometimes more than once a day. And the severity of it had definitely increased. But I didn’t want to divulge all of that to Reed. It would only make him think it was more serious than it was.
“Well, it’s always best to just check it out. Like you said, it’s probably nothing, but every now again it can be something. Always good to just know. So, we’re going to do a CAT scan and test it out. Ever done one before?”
I didn’t even want to think about doing a CAT scan, let alone talk about it. “You know me, I’ve always been more of a dog person,” I said and tried to make light of the conversation.
He laughed. “Knucklehead.”
“So,” I said to change the conversation. “What’s happening in your life? Now that Trinity is not here, I figured I could ask you.”
“What do you mean? You know my life. Work, be a father. Work, be a father. That’s all there is to it, really. It’s hard work, but I’ve gotten into an easy routine now. And it’s pretty rewarding, I have to admit.”
“And there aren’t any women in your life? You’re not dating?” I asked. I thought about what Blaire had said about perhaps trying to push him in the right direction and decided it was worth trying. Also, I’d do anything not to talk about the upcoming CAT scan that he was now preparing as we talked. I tried not to look at any of the equipment.
“A woman? No, definitely not. I don’t have time for dating right now. I’m too busy. I can have fun later on, but right now the only thing I can do is provide for my daughter. That is the number one thing in my life.”
I wanted to tell him that it was time that he put himself first, and that he had to stop using his daughter as an excuse, but I couldn’t find the words. I’d already said more than I usually did. But he was the one that changed the subject before I could.
“How about you? What’s happening with Blaire? She seems nice.”
I smiled. “She is nice. She’s more than nice really. She’s amazing. I’ll be honest; I have no idea what’s going on. We haven’t really discussed it. I took her on two dates before bringing her here. There’s been some weird stuff happening back at home with someone knocking on her door and running away, or calling her and then not saying anything. She was pretty freaked out, so I decided to bring her along with me.”
“Seriously? That’s horrible. What’s wrong with people?”
“Yeah, exactly. Anyway, there have been no phone calls since we’ve been here so hopefully it was just some kids playing a prank or something. It’s nice to have her here. I didn’t think it would be as easy to have her around as it is.”
“Sounds like you really like her. I’ve never heard you talk about anyone like this. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever met one of your girlfriends before. You don’t really date, do you? You normally just hook up with girls.”
I laughed. “That sounds about right. I don’t know what’s going on, but it’s different with Blaire. I think I’m starting to really fall for her. I’ve never known something like this before.”
“I’m glad for you, Ryan. But be careful, okay?”
“Be careful? What do you mean?”
“I just don’t want you to get hurt like I did.”
“I’ll be careful,” I said. But I wished that Reed could see that not every situation was going to turn out the way his did with his ex-wife.
After that, we turned our attention back to the CAT scan. Reed explained how the whole worked and slowly took me through the process. Afterward, he asked me to wait for him in the waiting area until he looked through everything. He didn’t make me wait too long, but it still felt like forever. I didn’t know what to do with myself. I picked up a magazine and paged through it only to realize I hadn’t actually looked at the pages at all. When he finally walked in and called me back to his office, I could feel my heart pounding in my chest. There was something in the way he had looked at me that made me feel uncomfortable.
I sighed. “Okay, give it to me straight, bro.”
“Ryan, it looks like you have severe head trauma. That’s what’s causing the headaches. And, from my look at the scan, I have a feeling your headaches are much worse than what you’ve been telling me. Am I right?”
Head trauma? That didn’t sound good. I wasn’t sure what to say. There seemed no point in lying to him anymore. “Yeah, they’ve been getting worse. And they’ve been happening a lot more. I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it.”
“A head trauma is a big deal, though. It’s not something to take lightly.”
“So, what exactly does this mean?” I asked even though I didn’t really want to know the answer.
Reed took a deep breath. “Ryan, it means that if you carry on fighting, you might cause more problems for yourself in the very near future. Another head injury could be fatal.”
“Fatal?”
“It could render you paralyzed or could even kill you. I’m not saying that’s where you are now. But I am saying that I don’t think you should fight anymore.”
Not fight? How could I not fight anymore? That was my whole life.