It seemed to take Sazar a long time to open the door this time. Or maybe the minutes just seemed to stretch out like taffy because Sarah's heart was beating so hard.
She’d taken the time to change out of the paint-stained suit—Lola had assured her the water-based paint would come out at the dry cleaners—and into something she hoped was more suitable.
But what was suitable attire for offering yourself as a blood sacrifice?
Sarah didn’t know. She had agonized about the decision for some time and decided at last on the jeans Kat had talked her into and a silky top of deep crimson. It had a V neck and flowing sleeves edged with lace of the same color as the blouse which could be pushed up easily to show the veins of her wrists or elbows. Sarah hoped the big Kindred went for the elbow—in her experience it hurt less to be poked by a needle there and she assumed it would be the same for fangs.
Despite the fact that she knew her choice of clothing would be viewed as perfectly modest and conventional aboard the Mother Ship, she couldn’t avoid the feeling that she was totally exposed. It was hard to come out of the protective shell she’d worn so long at the Compound. But now that her glasses were broken, it seemed like she might as well try to get used to her new look.
I look fine, she tried to reassure herself. Just because these clothes would be forbidden in the Compound doesn’t make them bad. I have to get away from the past, away from that way of thinking and learn to find my own style, like Kat said.
She was about to knock again when she heard a deep, weary voice say, “Come,” and the door slid open.
Commander Sazar was sitting in a large leather chair in front of the fireplace which seemed to be standard in all Kindred suites. He cupped the little clay vranna carefully in one hand, cradling it as though it was something precious. When he saw it was Sarah standing there, he put it down gently on a side table.
“So,” he said heavily, not bothering to get up. “You’ve come to offer your resignation. Can’t say that I blame you—you lasted longer than some of the assistants I’ve had.”
Sarah was taken aback by his appearance. Had she thought he looked tired and malnourished before? Now he looked beyond weary—almost ready to collapse. Not only that, his pale eyes had turned a dull red—was that also an indication of his thirst?
Her heart went out to him in a sudden flood of compassion—a deep welling of emotion, just as she’d had when she’d first seen Tsandor.
“No,” she said, striding purposefully over to him. “I didn’t come to give you my resignation. I came to offer you something else—something you need.”
“What are you—” The words died on his lips as she pulled back the full, trailing sleeve of the crimson blouse and offered him her arm.
“Drink,” she said simply.
His eyes blazed a deep, hungry red.
“You don’t know what you’re offering me. You don’t know how thirsty I am right now.”
An icy finger of fear slid down Sarah’s spine but she refused to give in to it. So her instincts had been right—he was thirsty. So thirsty he was barely controlling himself.
“Drink,” she repeated, not trusting herself to say anything else.
He took her arm in his big hands and for the first time she felt his warmth—a heat that radiated from his muscular body, the need like a flame blazing inside him. His warm, spicy scent surrounded her, making her feel dizzy.
“I can’t make it pleasurable for you,” he warned in a hoarse voice. His double set of fangs, placed where a human’s canine teeth would be, had grown long and incredibly sharp. “This will hurt—badly.”
“I’ve never been afraid of shots or needles,” Sarah said, trying to keep her voice from trembling. “Go ahead—do it.”
It seemed Sazar had exhausted the last of his willpower. With a low noise somewhere between a groan and a growl, he sank his fangs deep in the flesh of her inner elbow.
The pain was, as he had promised, intense.
Sarah bit her lower lip until she tasted blood when his fangs first dug into her sensitive flesh. But after the initial wound was made, she found that the pain was easing somewhat. Maybe it was because he had withdrawn his fangs and was just sucking now—drawing from her in deep, thirsty draughts.
This isn’t so bad, Sarah told herself. Now that his fangs are out it actually just feels like giving blood at the doctor.
Only somehow, it felt like more than that.
To Sarah’s intense discomfort, the sucking sensation seemed to spread from her arm to other, much more sensitive parts of her anatomy. When Sazar drew blood from her arm, she felt a deep pulling sensation not only in the inner crook of her elbow but also at the tips of her breasts and between her legs.
What’s happening? she wondered nervously. Is this normal? Why am I feeling like this?
She had no answers, only the growing pleasure which made her clench her free hand into a fist and press her thighs together tightly, trying to fight the pleasurable ache that grew inside her with each mouthful of blood Sazar took from her.
What is he doing to me? What…how…
Her thoughts seemed to be growing hazy and suddenly the room was spinning. Sarah felt light-headed and weak and then she was falling…
“Careful!” Strong arms caught her just before the world went dark.
* * * * *
An unknowable length of time later, her eyelids fluttered. Sazar breathed a sigh of relief as he cradled her limp body in his lap. The Blood Hunger had overcome him and he had taken too much from her. She was so little to begin with, he might have drained her dry.
He didn’t usually require so much blood but it had been so long, so very long since Malinda…
Sazar pushed the thought of his dead mate aside along with the lingering ache that came with it. He had to concentrate on Sarah now—had to be certain he hadn’t done her any lasting damage.
Her eyelids fluttered again, the lashes like dark fans on her pale cheeks.
“What…where am I?” she murmured thickly.
“Here in my suite, with me,” Sazar answered. “How do you feel?”
“Dizzy.” She tried to sit up but he held her down, cradling her against his chest. Gods but she was soft and curvy in his arms and her scent was amazing.
Not that he should notice such a thing about his assistant.
“Don’t try to move just yet. I took too much from you. For that I must ask your forgiveness.”
“What? I don’t…Oh!” Her hazel eyes went wide with sudden remembrance and understanding. “Am I…will I be okay?”
“I believe so, yes, since you’re talking and apparently thinking clearly,” Sazar said dryly. “Here, drink this.” He held the cup he’d gotten from his food delivery chute to her lips.
She started to sip and then winced away.
“Ouch!”
“Is something wrong?” Sazar drew the cup away, concerned.
“Nothing,” she said sheepishly. “I just…I think I bit my lip when you, uh, sank your fangs into me.”
“Ah, I see.” He looked at her lush pink mouth—there did seem to be a small wound on her bottom lip he hadn’t seen before. “Do you wish me to heal you?” he asked. “As I did your arm after I drank from you?” He nodded down at the crook of her elbow and Sarah looked there too, her eyes wide. Her pale skin was smooth and unbroken, as though he had never pierced her flesh at all.
“I’m still amazed you can heal me like that,” she murmured dreamily. To Sazar she still sounded only half conscious.
“It’s only fair considering that I am the cause of your wound. Will you allow me to heal you now?” he asked.
“I…I guess so,” she murmured dreamily.
Gods, shouldn’t want to do this so much…but he did.
Setting down the cup, he cupped her cheek in his free hand and tilted her mouth up to his. Bending down, he sucked her lower lip gently into his mouth and laved it carefully with his tongue.
Sarah gave a soft, low moan and suddenly the healing turned into a kiss. She threw her arms around his neck and Sazar found that for a brief moment, he was tasting her fully.
Lust filled him—a desire to own and possess—a need to claim her as his own so strong it nearly overloaded his system. Once more his fangs sharpened, ready to bite at the moment of claiming and he crushed her to him, eager for more of her sweetness.
Then Sarah stiffened abruptly and pulled away. With a great effort of will, Sazar let her.
“I…I’m sorry,” she gasped. “I don’t know what came over me. I think…I thought I was having a dream. I just…I don’t…”
“It’s all right.” He saw that she was flustered and embarrassed. He was ashamed himself—he shouldn’t be taking advantage of a subordinate, especially not in her vulnerable state. What was wrong with him? He’d never had any desire to kiss from any of his other assistants. In fact, he hadn’t even wanted to take blood from any of them, though it was a necessity. None of them attracted him but Sarah, well…this curvy little human was a different case.
Trying to cover his own confusion as well as hers, he offered her the cup again.
“Here—you need sustenance.”
Sarah swallowed obediently several times.
“Orange juice,” she said with a weak laugh when he took the cup from her lips. “Isn’t that what they give you when you donate blood? But where are my cookies? I’m supposed to get some of those too, right?”
Sazar frowned. “I asked my computer operating system for a natural Earth liquid full of potassium and sugar to revive you after your recent blood loss and this is what it recommended. Should you also require something else such as these ‘cookies’ whatever those may be, I can have them sent up the food delivery chute as well.”
It was Sarah’s turn to frown.
“You don’t know what cookies are? And I thought I led a sheltered life. Even in the Compound we had cookies. Mostly only Father Caleb got to eat them but sometimes we could sneak one or two…” She trailed off when she saw him watching her.
“What is the Compound?” Sazar asked softly. “Is that the place you ran away from? Is it a facility run by The Brotherhood of Peace?”
Her eyes flickered nervously away from his face and he sensed she didn’t want to talk about it.
“I’m just saying you ought to know about cookies, that’s all. Look, the orange juice worked—I’m not a bit dizzy anymore. Let me sit up.”
She struggled against him and Sazar helped her up obligingly. But the moment she got to her feet, she started to wobble and he had to reach out quickly to catch her and pull her back into his lap.
“Just relax,” he ordered her. “Sip some more of this juice of the orange and try to regain your strength.”
“Orange juice—it’s orange juice, not juice of the orange,” she mumbled as he put the cup to her lips again.
She finished the liquid this time but Sazar wouldn’t let her up again—not yet. He told himself he didn’t want her to faint and hurt herself but far in the back of his mind he couldn’t help thinking how long it had been since he’d held a female in his arms. Especially such a soft, curvy, delicate little female. The scent of her hair and skin drifted up to him like the warm aroma of some exotic flower and the taste of her mouth was still on his tongue.
Her kisses were as sweet as her blood—he wanted more.
Well, you can’t have more, he lectured himself. It’s not right—it should never have happened in the first place!
Still, he couldn’t help holding her close and telling her to be still.
“This isn’t right, you holding me like this,” she protested weakly. “You’re my boss. This isn’t…isn’t in the contract.”
“I’m only holding you until I’m sure you won’t get dizzy and fall over,” Sazar remarked. “And as for our contract, I’m afraid I have already violated it. I took much more of your blood than was legally mandated.”
Her large eyes turned up to his looking vulnerable and uncertain.
“Will you always need this much? I mean, I’m just asking because I might need to start taking iron supplements or something…”
Sazar shook his head.
“I should never need so much blood from you again. I was…exceptionally thirsty when you offered yourself. I had been in a state of semi starvation ever since…” He cleared his throat, looking away. “Ever since my mate died.”
“I’m sorry.” The compassion in Sarah’s voice caught him off guard and he looked back at her.
“Sorry for what?”
“Sorry for your loss. Sorry that I…pushed you earlier.” Her eyes flickered over to the clay vranna. “I haven’t known you long enough to, uh, lecture you. I don’t know your past. I shouldn’t have presumed.”
“I don’t know your past either—not much of it,” Sazar pointed out. Although he certainly wanted to learn more. The few tidbits she’d dropped intrigued him. What or who was she running from at The Brotherhood of Peace? What had made her so desperate to take this job with him, even knowing she would have to give him her blood?
Sarah’s eyes flickered again and he sensed she didn’t want to answer his unspoken question.
“Tell you what,” she said. “Let’s let the past be the past. I won’t bother you about yours if you don’t bother me about mine.”
“For now,” Sazar agreed gravely. “But to answer your earlier question, no, giving me your blood will not always be like it was tonight. I’m afraid there will still be pain—”
“It’s not the pain I’m asking about—it’s the pleasure,” Sarah exclaimed.
Sazar raised his eyebrows at her.
“Pleasure?”
“You know…” Her pale cheeks were getting pink, though she’d given him too much of her blood for them to grow truly red. “The way I felt when you were…were sucking from me. I mean I didn’t just feel it in my arm. I felt it in…well…”
She gestured with one hand, waving vaguely to her breasts and the area between her thighs.
Sazar couldn’t have been more shocked if she’d slapped him. For a moment he was speechless, trying to collect his thoughts. Could it be that this little human female had experienced the Blood Pleasure when he drank from her, even though they had no prior physical connection? But that was something only a Fated Mate would feel!
Not even Malinda, as much as he had loved her, had felt the Blood Pleasure when he bit her to feed from her. She had only been able to experience ecstasy from his bite when he bit her during bonding sex and injected his essence—something which was impossible during feeding.
“Tell me more about what you experienced,” he said urgently. “Describe it exactly—I need to know.”
Her cheeks went even pinker.
“Never mind. I must have imagined it. Look, can I please get up now, Commander Sazar?”
So she was returning to their formal relationship—it was definitely a hint for him to let her go.
Reluctantly, Sazar helped her get on her feet again. She wobbled for a moment but this time she didn’t fall over.
“Sarah,” he said gravely. “Do you still want to work for me? I know tonight as been…traumatic. I shouted at you and nearly drained you dry. I violated our contract. For that I am truly sorry.”
She lifted her chin.
“Yes, I’ll still work for you. You don’t know what—” She bit her lip and he got the sense she was choosing her words carefully. “This job saved me,” she said at last. “Being up here in the Mother Ship away from Earth—it’s the best possible place for me.”
“So it’s better to be with a superior who shouts at you and drinks your blood than to be back down on Earth?” Sazar asked quietly. “Who are you running from, Sarah?”
“I…I don’t want to talk about it…Sir,” she added. “I should just…I need to go to bed.”
“Very well.” Sazar would let her keep her secret—for now. He was fairly certain it had something to do with The Brotherhood of the Peace, for which she had worked for five years. But they were supposed to be a religious organization devoted to peace and self sacrifice. How could that be a bad thing?
“I guess I’ll see you in the morning?” Sarah asked.
He nodded thoughtfully.
“Indeed. I’ll expect to see you after mid-meal—what your people call lunch. We’ll have a short briefing and then we’ll be on our way to Alquon Ultrea.”
“Really?” Her eyes widened. “So soon?”
“Is that a problem?” Sazar asked her. “I thought you wanted to be far from Earth. You can’t get much farther than going to a whole different galaxy.”
She lifted her chin—he was quite beginning to like that defiant little gesture.
“No, that’s fine with me. I was just…surprised, that’s all. But I’ll be ready—I met a new friend today—Kat. She’s married to the Twin Kindred officers Deep and Lock. She’s going to make us some Alquon clothes.”
“That’s very good.” Sazar was pleased at her forethought. “I appreciate you taking steps to see that we’re prepared for our mission.”
“I’ll make sure we're ready for anything,” Sarah promised. “See you after lunch tomorrow.”
“All right. And Sarah?”
She had been making her way to the door but she turned back.
“Yes, Commander Sazar?”
“Be certain you eat enough to replenish your strength,” Sazar ordered.
She paled a little.
“Okay. Are you, um, going to drink from me again?”
He frowned. If she had really experienced the Blood Pleasure, she would be eager for him to drink again, not frightened or worried. Perhaps she had simply been imagining whatever sensations she’d felt after all.
Well, that was disappointing but hardly surprising. Coming across a Fated Mate was a rare occurrence for a Pitch-Blood. So rare that not one male in ten thousand would ever find such a female in their lifetime.
“No,” he said, answering her anxious question. “I’m not going to drink from you again for an entire week—as per our agreement. I simply want you to replenish what you have lost. I don’t want you to be too weak to function on Alquon Ultrea.”
That defiant chin tilt again.
“I’ll be fine, Sir—don’t worry about me.”
“All right,” Sazar said simply. “I won’t.” But that didn’t mean he wouldn’t think about her. About how sweet her blood was, how delicious her scent, how soft and curvy she’d been in his arms—how good her mouth had tasted in that one moment she’d kissed him back. Gods, just thinking of it made his shaft hard!
Which was plainly unacceptable.
Have to stop this now, he told himself grimly. She’s your assistant. The humans have a name for acting on such feelings—it’s called sexual harassment.
Sarah wobbled a little and for a moment he thought she would fall—then she righted herself and continued towards the door. Though he wanted to jump up and go sweep her into his arms so that he could carry her to her suite, Sazar restrained himself. He had to reign in his emotions—had to get this relationship back onto a professional track.
“Good night, Ms. Michaels.” Deliberately, he made his voice cool and impersonal. “I’ll see you tomorrow after mid-meal.”
“After lunch…Sir,” she agreed. She gave him a little nod of her head and then she went through the door and it whooshed shut behind her.
Sazar sat staring after her for a long time.
He had a bad feeling that his little human assistant had gotten firmly under his skin and he would have a Goddess damned hard time dislodging her.