Chapter 37
Zachariah
Pulling up into the makeshift parking space, I glanced over at Avidya, watching her expression. It turned from one of question to one of amazement. I knew this place would be one of the best places to take her first. Not only would it test one or two of her new-found limits, but also a place that she’d enjoy to make it easier on her.
I didn’t want to push her too hard after her having a panic attack, but for her to be ready for what was to come, she needed a bit of a push.
This piece of land wasn’t all that far from my house, and the age was clearly seen on the lone makeshift playhouse with a swing attached off to the side. The house that once sat on this land was long gone due to lack of upkeep.
The playhouse used to be painted a dark blue, with a window on each side and a tin roof. Growing up as a child it easily fit me and my brother inside, plus a friend or two. It was where I went to hide more often than anywhere else when my parents had company over.
The little awning had two chains that once held a yellow seat for the swing. A cute little place for kids. The grass was more weeds and colorful wildflowers now, but I could still picture how the building had once looked as laughter had once rung out around here.
“I used to live here,” I stated in explanation as I helped Avidya out of the car. “The house was taken down years ago, but the playhouse was left, even though it had certainly seen better days too.”
“I bet it was cute,” Avidya said, a shy smile on her face.
“It was. Mom had painted it and made sure it was kept standing,” I said with a fond smile myself. “Melio and I used to spend hours out here playing, rain or shine.”
I watched as she took in the playhouse with a new look. I could see her mind start wandering with possibilities. Possibilities that she wisely kept to herself. My mom often commented that she’d fix it up again, or come up with a new idea closer to the house if I ever had grandchildren. Children were not in my future, ever. I’d make sure of it.
There was a reason why I wanted Avidya to stay on the depo shot after I found out that she had been given her first dose the night she was brought to me. Of course, she still had another month to go before she needed another depo shot.
“The reason I brought you here was to work on one of the trust scenes. Your panic attack earlier today showed me that only way you will fully trust me is if you can see that you can.”
I paused, watching her reactions. Her eyes lit up a bit, her attention fully on me.
“I won’t push you too hard, not this time,” I went on. “Do you remember the safe words?”
“Yes,” she answered easily. “Red, yellow, and green.”
“Very good,” I praised, seeing instantly how my praise made her shoulders shift back a little.
“I want you to stand, and close your eyes. I want you to concentrate on your senses, one at a time. I’ll ask you to tell me what you feel, hear and smell,” I explained.
“Okay,” she said.
“I will walk around, but I won’t be going very far. You’ll have to talk loud enough that I can hear you from here, to at least the play house,” I said.
“Alright,” she said with a nod, ready to begin.
After she took a deep breath, she closed her eyes and I took a few steps away from her. Our entire relationship would be on our trust for one another, and this was one of the best places to begin at.
“What do you hear?” I asked her, taking a few more steps away from her, trying to step as lightly as possible.
“Birds chirping,” she said instantly. “The hum of the cars on the road.”
“Anything else?” I asked.
“Frogs,” she said after a moment.
“Good. Color?” I asked as I began to walk around her so I was in front of her.
“Green,” she answered instantly.
“Green, what?” I asked out.
“Green, sir,” she instantly replied, a small smile crossing her lips.
“Good girl,” I praised.
“What do you feel?” I asked out next.
“The air,” she said.
“Now?” I asked after picking a long piece of grass and running it down her arm, causing her to slightly twitch at the feeling. If it was anyone else, I’d have used something else to test her senses, but I had promised to not use a whip or cane on her. Not until she asked at least. I didn’t have any doubt that in a year or so, she’d be begging me to use it.
“Grass?” she stated in an answer. “it tickles.”
“When we do a scene, if we ever do with any toys, some of them will be a bit ticklish. Having your eyesight closed off can make it feel differently. It enhances everything,” I said, dropping the grass. “But to ever get to that stage, your trust in me has to be there one hundred percent.”
“I want to trust you,” she said just above a whisper.
“I know you do,” I said, running a hand down the side of her face. She instantly leaned into my touch, keeping her eyes shut. “In time you will.”
“You don’t trust me that much,” she stated, not afraid to tell me.
“More than I should,” I muttered to myself. Louder, “I trust you more each passing day, Avidya. You’re easy to read, and I don’t think you could possibly break my trust that I do have for you. Someday you’ll know more about the inner workings on what I do, but hopefully, you won’t need to.”
“I’m not sure I can handle more than what I know now,” she said.
“Probably not,” I agreed. “I’ve dumped a lot on you the last few weeks. It’ll take the time to grasp everything. And your mother on top of it all doesn’t help.”
“I don’t know what to do about that,” she stated, opening her eyes to look at me.
“That’s up to you,” I said. “You can meet her if she wants to see you. Or you can just write her a letter and Travis can make sure she gets in. Her doctor hasn’t called any of us yet.”
“It hasn’t been all that long,” she stated.
“No, it hasn’t,” I replied. “You’ll figure it out when the time comes. I’ll be there every step of the way.”
Avidya gave me a knowing smile. She knew I’d be there either way. I wouldn’t let her face her mother without me there. Not knowing what would happen, I felt better with planning on going if they wanted to meet face to face.
“So, what was the whole point of coming here?” she asked me as I dropped my hand.
“One of the places that popped into my head,” I shrugged in an answer. “And I hadn’t been here for a while. If you look over there,” I pointed off to the distance, maybe only about a mile where a house could be seen. “That’s where my parents live.”
“Oh, wow,” she said, her eyes widening.
“Close to home still,” I stated. “Plus, I wanted to share a little piece my childhood with you.”
“I never had a playhouse,” she stated. “Cody thought it was a waste of time and space. Of course, he didn’t really want me anywhere that he couldn’t easily see or hear me.”
“Controlling man,” I muttered out.
“Just a bit,” she shrugged like it was nothing new. “I’m surprised he hasn’t come charging down your door yet.”
“He doesn’t know where I live,” I said, giving her a wink as I took her hand and started to lead her up to the playhouse. “Or he would have by now. My father will make sure he doesn’t interfere with our wedding.”
“If he does, I’ll kick him where it hurts,” she mumbled before instantly turning red.
“Same here, honey,” I laughed while pulling her into my side.
“Will anyone in your family be upset about us?” she asked.
“I don’t care what any of them think. You are mine, and that is all that you need to remember,” I stated, pulling her closer to me as I wrapped my arm around her shoulders.