FIFTEEN
MATTHEW
DROPPING MY KEYS ON THE COUNTER, I pulled open the refrigerator for a bottle of water. Running always cleared my head, so after an early lunch with my new friend Iris, I came and ran the length of Battery Front Park.
As soon as I walked in my door and was tugging my shirt over my head, my phone buzzed with a text message from Shannon. She wanted to see me. Wanted to go out drinking, which I wasn’t sure was a great idea for either of us. At least not until I figured her out.
Her reaction the night before had confused me.
I stared down at my phone, feeling unsure of her response.
Red: See you then.
Something was up. After the way she reacted to my touch, it was obvious Shannon was dealing with dark demons. I wanted her to talk to me about it—open up and let me in so I could fight whatever it was stalking her.
I would do that for her.
I would slay her demons.
One thing was for sure. After watching her storm away from me and feeling the desperation of needing her to come back, I was prepared to admit I was falling for Shannon hard.
It didn’t make any sense. After years of keeping my distance from emotions and women, I couldn’t get close enough to Shannon. I wanted to be with her all the time.
Touching her.
Laughing with her.
It was all I wanted.
All I needed.
The rest could come when she was ready, and if by some chance she was never ready to move to the next level with me, then so be it. We could cross that bridge when we got to it.
I was going to tell her that tonight after the bar. It was time I sat her down and told her what we were doing was no longer just about sex. It was so much more to me now. So. Much. More.
I KNOCKED ON HER DOOR A LITTLE BEFORE NINE.
She stepped out into the breezeway of her apartment building without inviting me to come inside.
She was wearing yet another dress. This one the color of fall leaves with tiny bits of green. It had long sleeves with a low-cut neckline and fell just above her knee. She had a thing for wearing dresses that showed off her gorgeous legs. My eyes dipped down, following the curve of her knee and landing on the brown suede boots she was wearing.
She looked amazing as usual, but instead of saying something and making her feel uncomfortable again, I looked away and ran my fingers through my hair to keep from touching her.
“I take it Lilly and Devin are inside?” I asked since she was so quick to keep me from going inside her apartment.
“Yep.” Her smile was different.
As if she was trying extra hard to be happy.
“Everything okay?”
She nodded, and her smile slipped into something a little more genuine. “Everything’s fine. I promise.”
Once we were in my car and our seat belts were buckled, she turned my way with an excited smile. “Which bar are we going to? I haven’t been to many.”
I chuckled. “So another wild woman night then?”
She had been pierced and tattooed. Now it was time to go bar hopping, apparently.
She giggled. “Another wild woman night sounds fun. Let’s do that.”
“Ever been to The Waterfront?” I asked.
Her eyes went wide. “I’ve heard of it, but I’ve never been.”
“Well, there’s a first time for everything.”
I took a back way to The Waterfront on a road that ran alongside the coast. Shannon stared out at the moonlight reflecting on the water as I drove. Every now and again, I’d peek over at her and take in her profile. The tilt of her chin and slide of her cheek.
She was beautiful, and tonight, I planned to make her mine.
Not sexually, since it was obvious she wasn’t ready for that, but completely mine.
The Waterfront didn’t disappoint with its lavish setting and back deck on the water. Shannon was in awe of the beautiful view and so was I. While she was looking at the water and the view of the bridge in the background, I was looking at her.
“Hey, Matt, what’s up, man?” Curtis asked as he passed me with a girl on his arm.
She was cute. A tiny brunette with too much makeup and not enough clothes.
“I’m good. Where’s your brother?” I hadn’t thought about the fact that Curtis and Jonathan would be there as well as everyone else I knew. But I didn’t care. I wasn’t hiding Shannon from them. I was more worried about hiding them from her.
They were the embarrassing ones.
She wasn’t.
“He’s out and about. Probably on the yacht with his newest fling.” As he said this, he eyes trailed over Shannon in a way that made me uncomfortable. “Don’t I know you from somewhere?” he asked her.
She smiled up at him and shook her head. “I don’t I think so. I’m sorry.”
“You look awfully familiar.”
“I hear that a lot.”
He turned back to me. “Coming over to shut the night down with us?”
We usually ended our nights out on the yacht, passing out in one of the rooms below deck. “Not tonight, but maybe next go ‘round.”
Again, his eyes moved over Shannon. “Yeah. Maybe. Okay, man, have fun. See you later.”
“You too.”
Their interaction seemed strange, at least on Curtis’s end. Shannon was oblivious to him and his new fling, focusing more on the sights around her and the million-dollar view.
“This is beautiful,” she said, taking it all in.
“Agreed.” But I wasn’t looking at the view; I was looking at her.
She turned my way and blushed when she realized my eyes were on her.
The night was great; Shannon drank and laughed. She chatted with my friends when they stopped by as if she had known them her entire life, and they seemed to like her. She wasn’t usually so open and excited, but every time she lifted her cup to sip her drink, I knew it was the alcohol talking.
The more she drank, the happier she became. She moved closer and her hands explored my knee, working its way up throughout the night until she was leaning against me, snuggling into my side, and kissing me sweetly on the neck.
I had stopped drinking an hour in after seeing how heavily she was drinking, so I was sober. And while I was thoroughly enjoying her attention, I knew she was drunk.
“How about we get you home?” I said, rubbing the top of her hand as she ran it beneath my shirt.
“Your stomach is so flat,” she said in awe.
I chuckled.
“It’s so …” She ran her fingers over my ab muscles, and I swallowed hard, trying to ignore how wonderful her fingers felt against my skin. “There are all these ripples and muscles. It’s really sexy, Matthew.”
She was whispering in my ear, her voice effectively traveling down my body and landing in my balls. My cock was already standing with her attention, but I knew I couldn’t let it go anywhere. Not while she was drunk and unaware of what she was doing.
Her hand shifted lower, and I covered it with mine, pulling it back up and away from my dick.
“I definitely think it’s time to go home,” I said, pulling away a bit and grabbing her hand.
Her glassy eyes lit up, and she grinned. “I agree. Take me home. Take me and show me what it is you do to make women fall at your feet. Loosen me up, Matthew. Make me fall at your feet and forget it all.”
Her words stopped me. “What are you trying to forget?”
I was definitely missing something.
She waved her hand and giggled. “Nothing.”
She stood from her seat and leaned against me, making me laugh.
“You’re drunk. Come on.”
“I’m coming. I’m coming,” she muttered, tripping over her feet a little. “Oh, wait. No, I’m not coming … yet.” She laughed at her own joke, making me chuckle.
“Silly girl.”
I started walking her toward the exit. The quicker I could get her in my car and home, the better.
“I’m not a girl, Matthew,” she said, tapping the tip of my nose with her finger. “I’m a woman. Look at all this womanly-ness.” She made a sweeping gesture over her body with her arm and then grabbed her breast.
Thankfully, we were already in the parking lot and no one got a view of her grabbing herself. Honestly, if she wasn’t wasted, I would have enjoyed the view, but I knew she wasn’t herself.
“Yes, you’re all woman, baby. Trust me. I know.”
“Aww, you called me baby. That’s so freaking sweet. I like it when you call me sweet names.” We stopped at my car as I dug out my keys to open the passenger side door for her.
She stopped me, reaching up and grabbing me by the face with both hands. “Did you hear me? I said I like you, Matthew.”
I looked down at her, wishing she meant it and that it wasn’t just the alcohol talking, but I could see in her glazed red eyes and hear in the slur of her voice that she had no idea what she was saying.
Tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear, I leaned in and kissed her softly on the lips.
“I like you, too, Shannon. So much.”
With those words, she pressed against me, pulling me in and kissing me harder than she ever had. Losing her hands up the front of my shirt, she ran her fingers up my chest before moving them around my back and down to grab my ass.
I pulled away from the kiss. “Whoa, babe, let’s slow down and get you home.”
She pouted. “Why are you stopping this? I want you.”
I chuckled, knowing she was out of it. “Yeah, well, we can’t do it here against my car in the middle of the parking lot, now can we?”
I wasn’t going to have sex with her when she was drunk. I wanted her—there was no doubt about that—but I wanted her to know I was inside her when it finally happened.
My words worked, and she let me put her in the car and buckle her in.
By the time I was halfway across town, she was snoring in the seat beside me. I wanted to take her back to my place, but something told me that wasn’t a great idea. I wasn’t a weak man, but Shannon made me that way. I wasn’t sure I could continue to push her away every time she drunkenly threw herself at me, and I didn’t want to take any chances.
I shut my car off when I pulled up to her apartment building, and before waking her, I sat and watched her sleep soundly for a bit. From the flutter of her lashes against her cheek to the sleepy pout on her soft lips, she was winning me over. I could hardly believe it, but I was done for.
Reaching out, I slipped my fingers through her hair, cupping her chin and running my thumb over her cheek. I wanted her. Not just sexually, but completely.
Her eyes opened a bit, and she yawned. “Are we there?” she asked, her voice still slurred from too many drinks.
I nodded. “We’re at your place. Let’s get you inside and tucked in, okay?”
Lilly and Devin weren’t there, as usual, so I took Shannon into her room and sat her on the bed.
Her room was simple and clean with white bedroom furniture and gray walls. There were pictures of her and her friends and a vanity with lotions and sprays. Sheer curtains hung from the two windows, moving with the breeze of her ceiling fan. Her closet door was open, allowing me to see the loads of clothes, shoes, and purses she had.
It was all Shannon. It even smelled like her.
I pulled her shoes off her feet and helped her onto the bed. Pulling the blanket up around her shoulders, I pressed a soft kiss against her forehead.
“Call me tomorrow.”
She nodded with closed eyes.
I turned away, ready to leave her and go home, but just as I was about to leave her room, she called out my name.
“Yeah?” I turned around, taking in the view of her in bed without me.
“Please stay,” she said softly. The begging quality of her voice was doing me in, and I knew even though it would be hell lying next to her without touching her, I couldn’t say no.
I shut her bedroom door, closing us in together, and then I slipped my shoes off. Climbing into bed with her, I pulled back the blanket and slid in next to her warm body. She moved against me, and I clenched my eyes closed, enjoying the feel of having her so close.
Her fingers tangled in the collar of my shirt, and she worked her face between my shoulder and my chin, her sweet breath rushing over my neck with every breath she took.
It was hell.
It was heaven.
“Good night,” she muttered against my skin, sending my body into overdrive.
“Good night,” I responded.
Swallowing hard, I lay there and stare at the ceiling until I heard her softly begin to snore. She wanted me to stay, but I couldn’t. It was torture on my body knowing she was there, willing and ready. I wouldn’t sleep … not with her curves pressed so tightly to every part of my body.
As soon as she drifted into a deep sleep, I slipped from her bed, put on my shoes, and crept from her room. I was halfway through the apartment, getting close to the door when a light flicked on in the kitchen.
I turned quickly to find Devin standing in the kitchen staring back at me.
“What the fuck are you doing here, Matthew?” he asked, his accusing eyes trailing over me.
“You want the truth or the lie?”
“Fuck you. You know I want the truth. Are you fucking with Shannon now? Because I don’t think Lilly would like that too much, and anything that makes Lilly unhappy makes me unhappy.”
I nodded. “This is different,” I said, hoping that was enough of an explanation for him.
“It’s never different with you.”
He moved out of the kitchen, coming to stand toe to toe with me. His eyes moved over my face, and his tense jaw went slack.
“Holy shit,” he muttered to himself.
“What?” I asked defensively.
He chuckled and shook his head.
“This is exactly what you get, motherfucker.”
Again, he laughed.
“What the fuck are you talking about, man?”
“You’ll see. I don’t need to kick your ass. Being in love is like a punch to the gut. You’re already fucked, and you don’t even know it.”
At that, he chuckled once more before he turned away and started down the hallway.
“Lock up on your way out and good luck.”
And then he was gone. In the distance, I heard the soft click of a bedroom door and then the apartment was silent.
I locked the door and went to my car.
I’d come a long way, that was for sure. I had left a willing woman in her bed alone. That had to be a sign I was truly losing my shit.
My house was empty and dark, and I didn’t bother turning on any lights as I went to my room and peeled my clothes from my body. Just as I was climbing into bed, my phone buzzed. Thinking it was Shannon, I snatched my phone from the side table and swiped my thumb across the screen to open my messages.
Corrine: Up for a late-night fuck?
I didn’t bother responding. Instead, I closed my messages, set my phone back next to the side of the bed, and went to sleep.