Kristen’s phone has been buzzing all fucking morning. And since my friend is dead to the world, I’m stuck with a pillow over my head each time, until the caller gets a damn clue and hangs up. On the billionth time, I lean over and answer it.
“Kristen Miller’s phone, how can I help you?” I breathe into the phone, my eyes refusing to even open yet. “Hello? Anyone there?”
“Hi, Katie Beller.”
Oh, shit.
I click end and toss the phone.
Like it’s on fire.
“Ouch!” Kristen grunts, rubbing at her forehead where her phone just hit her. “Why’d you just do that?” Her blond hair is in her face and she barely has one eye open.
Before I have a chance to even reply the phone starts buzzing again. Kristen reaches for it—
“Don’t! Don’t answer that.” Oh, God. Why did I answer that call? His voice, it’s like a drug. Just hearing it again brings me back to that high I rode night after night.
Kristen looks at her phone and back at me. “Just give him a chance. If he upsets you, hang up. He said one call. Technically that would be fulfilling his blackmailish request.”
God. One call. One conversation. I can do this. No, I can’t. Yes, I can. Before I even make a decision, Kristen swipes the call.
“Oh my god, don’t, wait! It’s a FaceTime—”
I lose, because there pops Chase’s face onto the screen. His eyes find mine instantly.
“God, you’re beautiful.”
So are you.
Blink, Katie.
There’s this sudden urge to fucking smack him. Hang up on him. Cry maybe or yell. But I do nothing. I stare at him, as he stares back at me. And then I realize he has to be on fucking crack because I take a look at myself in the upper right-hand corner and my hair is sticking up and I resemble a raccoon left for dead.
“Just stop. What do you want, Bates?” I’m going to kill Kristen.
“I’m Bates now?”
“No, you’re the lying asshole who blackmailed my sweet, honest friend.”
He exhales heavily, bringing his hands into his hair. “What was I supposed to do? I needed to speak to you and you wouldn’t take my calls. I was out of options.”
“Um, I don’t know, continue with me not taking your calls?”
“Katie, please. I need you to hear me out.” Oh, I’ve heard him out. I’ve replayed every single possible thing he could say to me that would talk himself out of the truth. And in my lowest times, I debated on which one of those I would actually believe. Thankfully none of them.
“There’s nothing to hear, Bates.”
“Stop calling me Bates! Katie, please—”
“Please what, Chase? Please let you explain you have a fucking girlfriend? That you played me? That I let you in. The only guy I ever gave something to and you fucking took advantage of that!” I yell, my chest beginning to heave. “How could you? Was I a joke from the beginning? A conquest? Get the one girl you would never go for in your bed? To fall in love with you?” I angrily swipe the tear that falls down my cheek.
“No. I swear to you, no. Everything I did was real.”
“Yeah, sure it was.”
“It was, dammit. Katie, please let me explain. Rebecca. She was my girlfriend. Yes, at one time, but she wasn’t when we started what we did.”
I want to cover my ears. I don’t want to hear his excuses. His lies. I close my eyes, trying to hide the pain that’s quickly resurfacing.
“Katie, open your eyes. Look at me.”
I’m not sure why I even obey. Maybe I’m a glutton for pain.
“She’s my publicist.”
“Great, well, hope you and your publicist were able to work it out,” I snap.
“Just here me out! Please. Her father is CEO of the minor league hockey team I play for. Before I left for the book tour, I set things straight with her. She was the exact person I was running from. The one who saw me for my fame and money. Not for who I really was. We met through her father, and she took over all my PR. The modeling, the hockey. She runs it all. And when I walked away she threatened to ruin all that. I had to be careful. Her father has a lot of power. I didn’t care about the modeling. But I cared about hockey. I just wanted to play.”
So, I should feel bad that he played me while he had a girlfriend because daddy dearest would be mad if he dumped his daughter? “I’ve heard enough,” I say. I can’t do this.
“I broke up with Rebecca. I wouldn’t have touched you if I were in a relationship.”
“Well, apparently you were! She definitely thought otherwise, showing up announcing herself as your girlfriend, AND you didn’t say anything to justify it. You know what? I’m done—”
“I LOVE YOU!”
My breath catches and I even hear Kristen gasp.
“I love you, Katie. I meant it that night. And even more that morning. And I mean it now. Let me fix this.”
I’m so confused. My heart and my brain are at battle with one another, both fighting for the complete opposite. How can Chase fix this? Do I believe him? I mean, define broken up! If he didn’t get caught would he have ever told me about her?
“I have one question. That day. Someone walked into your place. You hung up on me. Why?”
His eyes close briefly. When they open, I see the guilt.
“Rebecca walked in.”
That’s what I thought. I didn’t want to admit it, but I knew. I attempt to swallow the lump in my throat before I ask the next question.
“If you broke up with her, why was she at your place?”
And there it is again. Guilt. It’s written all over his face. “Because we live together.”