Chapter Thirty-Two
Craig and I are seated at table sixteen, along with some of Hannah’s friends from college. We eat and drink and laugh, and I do a remarkable job of pretending to be utterly engaged in the conversation, but the truth is, my attention is on Ryan. He’s sitting at a table with the wedding party. Or he was. The chairs at the table are empty now. Damn. I looked away for only a second. Craig taps my hand and leans in close. “He’s approaching from eleven o’clock.”
I glance up, and sure enough, Ryan is heading toward me. “Hi.”
“Hey. Thanks again for helping my sister.”
“Sure. She’s sweet.”
“If it’s okay with your date, can I steal you for one dance?”
Craig coughs on his wine and looks up at Ryan. “Are you any good on the dance floor?”
“I do okay.” Ryan gives him a guarded half smile.
“You do okay.” He turns to me and says in a loud whisper, “You should dance with this guy even if he moves like a troll. Look at him, for God’s sake.” He waves a hand at Ryan as though he’s a prize on display.
Laughter erupts from me, and I stand, kissing Craig on the cheek. “You’re too much.”
“Have fun, kids.”
Ryan takes my hand in his, making my heart convulse in my chest. My left is in his right—the one that says love. I want it to mean something.
“Is Craig a friend or a boyfriend?” His jaw is tight as he awaits my response.
“He’s one of my best friends.”
He breaks into a smile that rivals the rising sun. “Good. He seems like a nice dude. And I promise I won’t dance like a troll.” He clears his throat, and a serious look replaces the humor in his eyes. “So where’s the other guy? Howard, is it?”
“Edward?” I’m surprised he even remembers him.
“That guy I saw you with.”
“He’s… I don’t know. We don’t really talk anymore. I went out with him only a few times.”
“Wow. The vibe he gave off was kind of possessive. I thought he was your boyfriend.” We reach the dance floor, but he crosses right over it, leading me to the grassy area overlooking the sea.
My heels catch in the grass, and I stop. “Don’t you think I would’ve mentioned it if I had a boyfriend? We talked about everything.” I look down, biting my lip. When I look back up, my voice is quiet. “But would it have mattered? I know you wished we hadn’t kissed. And I know it was Jasmine you were interested in, not me.”
He shakes his head, and his eyes get all squinty. “What?”
“It all became clear when you passed me off to Javier. I mean—”
“Aw, Katie.” His eyes are bright as they search mine. He touches a palm to my face. “Katie,” he whispers. “For someone as smart as you, your detective work sucks. I can’t date my clients. Javier has a zero tolerance policy.” He steps back, looking me in the eyes. “I was trying to set the stage to ask you out. And as for Jasmine, I love the girl, but she’s like a sister.”
“But she looked at you like she was so pissed the last time we trained.”
He slides his hands to my lower back, skimming his fingers across my bare skin. I shudder at his touch, and he smiles.
“Probably because she was on my ass to find you a new trainer. She said it was becoming way too obvious that I had a thing for you. She didn’t want me to end up fired or screwing things up with you.”
He feathers his hand across my back, and as much as I want to lean in to him and enjoy it, I need answers. It’s been too long. “But you never asked me out after that.”
He tightens his jaw and runs a hand down his mouth. “I invited you to go running, but you said no. And before that I called, but you didn’t call me back. Talking in the gym wasn’t going to happen. And then I saw you with that guy.” He scrubs a hand through his hair. “I wanted you to punch him in the solar plexus. That’s why I asked if you remembered what I taught you.”
Butterflies flail in my stomach, crashing wildly into one another like they’re drunk on sweet nectar. I bite my lip hard, wanting to feel the pain so I know this is real.
“I’ve missed you, Katie.” His gaze lands on my mouth, and he touches a hand to my cheek.
“I’ve missed you, too.” My words come out in a whisper. He’s so close his breath mixes with mine. I’m drawn to him like a magnet, the gentle pull gaining strength until I’m certain I’ll explode if he doesn’t save me with his kiss. His eyes are hungry, and I know he feels it, too.
“I’m going to kiss you now.” His lips meet mine with a delicious softness. His hands are in my hair, and I slide my fingers under his jacket, wanting to feel his body. Months of pent-up desire pour out between us. Every move, every touch is so right, like we’re two halves that have found a way to be whole.
Our kiss comes to a tender end, leaving our breath ragged. He places his hands on my shoulders, holding us steady, and smiles. “How is it that kissing you gets better every time?” I tuck into his arms, and he runs a hand down my hair. “I feel like I need to pinch myself.”
“Me, too.” I look up at him and smile. His eyes caress me. I feel beautiful, like I’m a fragile piece of art. He’s so strong, and even though he can probably kill someone with his bare hands, with me he’s nothing but gentle.
“Everything’s finally coming together. The tae kwon do studio. You.” He kisses me again. “Did I mention you?”
A shudder runs through me as I remember how Brad said you, like I was unworthy. But with Ryan, it’s the opposite. He makes me feel like I’m everything. “And did I mention you’re amazing?” I press a kiss to his lips. “And…I made a little career change myself.”
He raises a brow. “Really?”
“Really. I left Janks and Lowe and am now working at a family law firm. One of the women I met at the nonprofit, where I started volunteering after the whole thing with Jasmine, brought me in.”
“That’s awesome.” Moving closer, he wraps his arms around me. “Come here.” Touching his forehead to mine, he says, “I’m proud of you.”
The screeching of a microphone breaks the spell. Ryan laughs as two loud thumps sound. “Either the DJ is drunk or they’re having technical issues.” He pauses, listening as garbled words float across the night. “They’re announcing the speeches. I have to get over there. But before I go, I need to ask you something. Will you go out with me? On an official date?”
“I’d love to.”
My body feels liquid, like I could melt to the floor in a puddle of bliss. I can’t believe Ryan kissed me. Everyone’s eyes are on him as he finishes the best man speech.
Craig leans in. “So you two were gone for a while. And surprisingly enough, I didn’t see you on the dance floor. Care to share?”
“He kissed me.” I touch a hand to my lips, smiling. “I’m floating.”
“I’m happy for you, sweet Katie. He likes you a lot. I can tell.”
We watch the wedding guests talk and dance and laugh. The flowers tinge the night air with a heady scent; their reach is strong. Not unlike Ryan. His mere presence affects me in a profound way. “I was thinking about what the officiant said about knowing and love and all that. Do you think there are stages of knowing?”
“Interesting question. And yeah, I think there are. I don’t believe in love at first sight. Lust, sure, but not love. Love comes from knowing someone, flaws and all.” He turns to me. “You know Ryan pretty well.”
“Yeah. I think I do.”
Hannah bounds up to our table and sweeps into the chair next to mine, adjusting the skirt of her dress. “I’m so happy I finally have a second to sit with you.” She turns to Craig, extending her hand. “I’m Hannah. I’ve heard all about you. According to our mutual friend here, your level of awesomeness is off the charts.”
He takes her hand, kissing it. “Why thank you. And you’re as charming as our friend described.”
She laughs. “He’s good. And speaking of good, Ryan said he knows you, and then he actually blushed. Seriously. I almost dropped my glass of wine.”
I want to grab her hand and find a quiet corner to spill everything. God, I need to tell someone about the kiss. “I’ll fill you in later, but yeah, we know each other.”
Craig clears his throat. “Quite well, I’d say. They’ve swapped spit.”
“Shut up! Really?”
A stupid grin lands on my face. “He speaks the truth.”
She squeezes my shoulder. “This makes me so happy. Like I told you, we love him. He’s the one I thought lived near you. Remember that?”
“Yeah.”
“Ladies, I say we hit the dance floor.” Craig stands, holding out a hand to both of us. “I must warn you though: my dance moves are legendary.”
I laugh and take his hand. “Why doesn’t that surprise me?”
“Oh, you’ll be surprised all right. By legendary, I mean disastrous.”
Hannah grabs his hand. “Come on. My little sister will teach you something ridiculously cool.”
As we get closer to the dance floor, Ryan swoops Sydney off her feet and lands her on his shoulders. She grabs his hair and giggles, throwing her head back.
I step closer, unable to keep the smile from launching across my face. “Hey.”
He turns quickly, and more giggles tumble from the little girl. “Hey. Have you seen my niece anywhere?” He holds a hand out, palm down. “She’s about this tall, curly red hair?” He turns side to side, pretending to look for her, which plummets her into a fit of laughter.
“I’m right here, Unc Ry Ry!”
He spins again. “Did you hear that? I swear I just heard her voice.”
She pats his head and grabs at his ear. “Right here, silly!”
He swoops her into his arms and kisses her forehead before landing her on her feet. “There you are!”
She claps her hands and looks up at me. “You like Olaf.”
“Yes! You remembered.” I kneel down to talk to her. “Your dress is very pretty.”
“It’s itchy.” She turns to Ryan. “I take it off, Unc Ry Ry?”
He smiles. “Not yet, sugar. How ’bout we get you a piece of cake, and then we’ll track down your jammies.”
He winks at me. “I’ll be back.”
Twinkling lights brighten the dark sky. The cake was a huge hit, and now a hip-hop song blasts, and an exuberant vibe wafts across the packed dance floor. Even the parents are tearing it up. Hannah dances with her dad and Ryan with his mom. He introduces me, and the warmth in her greeting makes me think of Gran. We toast with champagne and dance until our feet are sore and our hearts are full. The night is like a fireworks show, colored with oohs and aahs and suddenly over way too soon.
It’s after midnight when Craig drops me off at my apartment. I pad up the stairs, having taken off my heels in the car to spare my aching feet.
As I let myself into my apartment, my body feels relaxed. I touch a hand to my shoulder and smile to myself. I wish Lauren were here so I could relive the night, but she’s at Paul’s place, just like every other Saturday night.
I splash cold water on my face and enjoy the sting of it on my hot skin. As I pat it dry with a soft towel, I look at my reflection. Turning my back to the mirror, I gaze over my shoulder at the spot just above my waist, trying to picture exactly where Ryan laid his hand when we kissed. I run my fingers over my skin, wishing I could go back to that moment and stay there.
He said he’d call me tomorrow. Technically, it is tomorrow, but clearly he meant in the morning. I step out of my dress and tell the doubts to settle down. He’ll call. My legs tingle as I strip off my nylons and then slip my soft pink nightshirt over my head.
My phone dings with a text, and I grab for it, wondering if I left something in Craig’s car.
Hi, beautiful. Wanted to make sure you got home safely. Missing you already.
I stare at the phone, my mouth agape. God, he’s perfect. “I like you so much, Ryan Brincatt,” I whisper, but I don’t type it. Instead, I write, Home safe. :) I miss you already, too.
I was hoping you’d say that. Open your front door.
My jaw drops again, and I frantically look around my room, wondering what the hell I can put on instead of my nightshirt. There’s no way I can get my dress back on. Jeans? Leggings? Screw it. I head to the door as I type. I have to warn you. I’m in my pj’s.
Even better.
I open the door slowly. “Hi.”
He runs his eyes over me, reading my nightshirt. “Angel, huh?”
“I warned you.”
“No. I like it. Come here, angel.” He shuts the door with his foot and drapes his arms around my waist. Our eyes meet, and we study each other, his eyes moving back and forth the way they have before, as though he’s reading my thoughts. If he could read them, he’d close his eyes and kiss me.
“I’m glad you came over.” My gaze flicks to his mouth, and it acts as a trigger. Suddenly, his hands slide up until they reach my face, caressing my cheek. He tilts his head, and my heart starts to hammer in my chest. How is it that one tiny move can affect my body in such an extreme way? I focus back on his eyes, grounding myself in the moment. I don’t want to think about chemistry or how the human body reacts. I want to shut off my brain and imbibe him.
His mouth is inches from mine, and I breathe in as he breathes out, my nostrils filling with the scent of peppermint. He feathers his lips across my mouth with a delicacy that makes me shudder.
Barely lifting his lips from mine, he whispers, “I love how you tremble every time I touch you. It turns me on.” His words make me feel bold. I touch my tongue to his lips, tracing the fullness of them until he groans.
My heart beats faster, and I press in to him. Slowly, he parts my lips with his tongue, kissing me like he has a sweet story to tell. I get lost in him, in the story that I don’t want to end.
When we part, I touch a hand to my swollen lips.
His eyes are hooded, sexy. “Katie,” he whispers. He touches his forehead to mine. “I’m so crazy about you.” His hands are in my hair, on my shoulders, caressing my arms. My hands trail under his coat, pushing it off. We stumble to the sofa, and I pull him down on top of me. Looping my arms around his neck, I draw him close, kissing his delicious lips. He responds hungrily, moving his mouth against mine. His lips find my neck, and I gasp as his teeth graze the most sensitive spot. “Your skin is so freaking soft.” His voice is husky. “So good, Katie.”
I shift so I’m on top of him, and he smiles up at me as I unbutton his shirt. I toss it to the floor, followed by his soft white T-shirt. “That’s better.” With the back of my hand, I trail my fingers across his stomach. A shiver ripples through him, and our eyes lock. He grabs onto the cushion, making a fist. I ease forward, kissing his stomach and then his chest, before finding his lips, teasing them with my tongue.
He moans. “You’re dangerous, Katie.”
I shake my head. “Not dangerous.” I trail my fingers up his arms. Touching the Chinese symbols, I ask, “What does this mean?”
He opens his eyes, and a breath ripples from his lips before he answers. “It’s one of the creeds of my tae kwon do studio. It means be humble, gentle, and strong.”
“That’s like you.” I brush a kiss across the black symbols and zigzag my hands over his chest. “This one’s so shiny.” Just above his rib cage is the outline of a jagged heart with two mourning doves flying toward it. They’re small—a little bigger than a quarter.
“It’s new.”
I jerk my hand from it. “Sorry. Does it hurt?”
“No. Your hands make me feel good.”
I smile. “What’s it mean?” He hesitates, and I flick my eyes to his. “You don’t have to tell me if you’d rather not. It’s okay.”
He wraps his arms around me, tucking me in to his chest and kissing the top of my head. He runs his fingers through my hair as he talks. “I got this one in Vegas when I was there for Alex’s bachelor party. There were all these hot club girls hanging around.” He pauses, and I can feel him holding his breath.
“You mean hitting on you.”
“Yep. I was single—I could’ve hooked up with any number of them, but I didn’t want to. So I bailed and went back to my room. I drew this.”
I shift so I’m sitting up. He inches forward, facing me, and touches his chest. “Mourning doves are lifelong partners. That’s what I was thinking about in my room—how I was going to hold out for something good, even if my heart gets beat up in the process.”
“It’s worth the risk, right? Finding something good?”
“Yeah.”
I bite my lip, nervous to tell him how I feel but knowing I’ll burst if I don’t. “I’m happy I found you. From the first day I saw you, there was something I was drawn to. And when I got to know you—”
“Mind blown?”
I laugh. “Yeah. You’re pretty awesome.”
“Thanks. I think you’re pretty awesome, too.” He circles his arms around me in a hug and runs his lips across my cheek. “Now that I have you, I don’t want to leave you, but it’s late.”
My heart flutters in my chest. “I don’t want you to leave, either. Stay.” I hold up a finger. “One condition, though.”
“Anything.”
“The shirt stays off.”
He tilts his head back, laughing. “Can I make the same request for you?”
“We’ll see. But for you, it’s a deal breaker.”
“Fine, then I’m going to spoon you all night.”
“Even better.”
He stands and takes my hand. “Lead the way.”
As we walk to my room, my heart feels like it expands in a way I couldn’t have imagined. Maybe this is what love feels like.
Ryan sits on the edge of my bed, slipping off his shoes. He looks up at me, his eyes sleepy. “The night I brought you home in the cab—do you remember any of it?”
I wrap my arms around my waist. “Not really. Did I do something horrid?”
He smiles. “Nah. It was cool.” His voice softens, remembering. “You told me you were done with dating and wanted to meet someone nice. And then you looked at me and said, ‘Maybe someone like you.’ It kind of blew my mind—made me feel special.”
I think back to that night, remembering how I felt. “Even then, I knew.”
“Just took us a while to get here.” He tugs at the bottom of my nightshirt, pulling me closer, and we tumble onto the cool sheets. “You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, Katie Capwell.”
“And you’re the best thing that’s happened to me.” I kiss his lips. I plan to do this a thousand times. Because I’m not letting him go. I’ve found what I’ve been looking for, and I’m going to hold on tight.