Chapter 19

Zach

“What the hell are you doing here?” I demanded as soon as I laid eyes on Alana, shifting to make sure she couldn’t get a good look at Jessibelle. The last thing I needed was for her to figure out what was going on between us and wind up blabbing it to someone important.

“I was in touch with your brother,” she explained, “and he said you’d gone to the house in Atherton and I was worried—”

“Worried about what and how does he know I’m here?” I snapped. I couldn’t believe this was happening.

“You used the catering staff,” she pointed out, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her head. Despite the dramatic looks she often used on various shoots, on her off-time, she appeared quite plain, brown hair and blue eyes and no make-up as far as I could tell. It was odd, having her in front of me again like this. A few months ago, I would’ve given anything to have her back, but now, I just wanted her gone.

“And why did he think it would be a good idea to send you up?” I asked, frowning. I knew my brother well, and I couldn’t imagine he’d think it would be wise to send up the woman who, as far as he was concerned, had broken my heart and left me alone at my darkest hour.

“I really need to talk to you,” she explained, her voice dropping as she peered over my shoulder. I guess I couldn’t hide Jessibelle from her forever. Jessibelle stepped forward and glanced up at me.

“I’ll give you guys some privacy,” she said, and I could hear the disappointment in her voice.

“I just wanted to make sure you were all right,” Alana blurted out. “You can’t blame me for that.”

“Okay. I’m all right, now go.” Before I could escort her toward the door, tears began to spill down her cheeks. Oh, shit. Well, if I kicked her out now, I’d have looked like a raging asshole, and that was the last thing I wanted Jessibelle to think about me.

“I’ve missed you so much,” she gasped, as she attempted to catch her breath. “I should have never let you go. I can see that now. I was just so scared of what you’d become. You have to understand that.”

“I do,” I admitted, hoping if I just stuck to what she wanted to hear, she’d get out of here. “But you need to go.”

“You can’t seriously stand in front of me like this and tell me you don’t feel anything,” she replied angrily, blinking back tears and dashing a couple away with the back of her hand. I studied her and realized for the first time since we’d split up, I could say without a doubt that I had no feelings left for this woman.

I’d fallen for Jessibelle so hard, I hadn’t been able to give much time or thought to Alana, but now I knew for sure. I didn’t want to be with her. If I had the choice between the two women, I’d take Jessibelle every single time. And now, I just needed to get Alana gone and get back to business with Jessi.

“I really should get going.” Jessibelle came up from behind me, fully dressed, bag in hand, and I could feel her discomfort coming off her in waves. I couldn’t say I blamed her. She was trapped in an awkward situation. We should’ve been enjoying ourselves over breakfast and finding our way back to bed for the rest of the morning. I turned to catch her arm, to ask her to stay because there was nothing Alana could say or do that would make me want Jessibelle to leave. But she was already a dozen feet away from me. And Alana had other ideas.

As Jessibelle made her way to the door, Alana threw herself at me. I’d heard of women throwing themselves at people before, but I’d never been on the receiving end of such an action.

I reached out to catch her, and her tears came harder than before, her body shaking in my arms as it was wracked with deep sobs. I looked over my shoulder at Jessibelle, wanting nothing more than to go after her.

“Alana, please,” I pulled her to her feet. “Nothing’s going to change my mind on this. You need to go.”

“But things are different now!” she protested, lifting her head and looking at me. “You must see that.”

“No, they’re not.” I shook my head. “One of us still doesn’t want to be with the other. It’s just switched sides now. I’m sorry it’s turned out like this, but you didn’t seriously expect me to sit around waiting for you to come back all this time.”

“I love you so much,” she gasped, heaving in a breath. “You’ve got to give us another chance, Zachary.”

“I don’t fucking have to do anything.” I bristled at her implication. I didn’t like being told what to do, never had. “We are done.”

“Things have changed now.” She managed to plant her hand on the table and stand herself up. She was still a little shaky, but I decided to give her the chance to say her piece. I didn’t know why, I should’ve been enjoying myself, reveling in my victory, and here I was trying to remind my ex why she’d left me.

“Okay,” I waved my hand, indicating for her to continue. “What? What has changed? Did your heart melt?”

“Like, you’ve got more time now,” she pointed out. “That’s why you were able to come all the way up here and take some time away from work.”

“I’m still working,” I snapped. “That woman who’s here, she’s my lawyer.”

“Oh?” Alana raised her eyebrows pointedly, but I shook my head.

“It’s not like that,” I muttered, irritated. “She’s just working for me. We’re staying out here because—”

I realized I didn’t have a good reason as to why Jessi and I were sequestered away in this place—but I didn’t have to give her one, anyway. I shook my head again.

“It’s confidential,” I finished up.

“Well, if you can take a few months off like you did before, then you can take some time off to spend it with me.”

“I wasn’t taking time off,” I replied tautly. “I was depressed, Alana. I couldn’t leave the house. I didn’t want to see anyone or do anything. It wasn’t like one of your fucking retreats.”

She stared at me, a flicker of incomprehension in her eyes. She didn’t get where I was coming from, and frankly, I didn’t want to explain the ins and outs of clinical depression to her. Her eyes filled with tears again and her legs began to buckle, so I reached forward to catch her. Shit, this wasn’t going well. I needed her out of here as soon as possible. I looked over my shoulder, to where Jessibelle had left us, hoping she’d stuck around, but she was nowhere to be seen. I couldn’t blame her for leaving. But I couldn’t just dump Alana on the kitchen floor and go after the woman I really wanted. I’d look like a monster.

“But you have more time for me now,” she was blubbering. “That was the problem. You were too obsessed with work.”

“The problem was we just didn’t work together,” I replied bluntly. I needed to wrap this up, before Jessibelle got too far away for me to give her an explanation.

“Please,” she begged one last time. “Please, just give us another chance. That’s all I’m asking.”

“And I’m telling you, the answer is no,” I shot back, stiffening with anger. I had already told her a few times, but she was just choosing not to hear it. That wasn’t my problem. It was hers.

“How did you get up here?” I demanded. “Driver?”

She nodded weakly.

“Then you can get out of here the same way.” I snapped and pulled her to her feet, guiding her toward the door.

Now I had to go find Jessibelle.