chapter eight
Things I would tell my fifteen-year-old self now that I’m grown:
“Do not sneak out of the house…” AF
~Tempest~
My stomach twists the entire ride home from Arika’s school. Knowing I will be distracted all day because of Arika’s situation, I send a message to Cameron Linn to let her know I will be in late or I will just work from home today. “Deacon, you aren’t gonna like this, but I can’t let you give Arika the information she seeks.” I go straight ahead and tell him what needs to be said as soon as we walk in my house.
“Well, that’s one way to tell me no. Problem is, babe, I made a deal. I gave the girl my word. I’ll get the information for her.”
Every inch of my body tightens. “Deacon, you’re opening Pandora’s box. Once it’s out, there will be no turning back.”
“What are you so afraid of?”
I feel the tears hit like a flood. I don’t even try to fight them. “He’s gonna kill us both. You’re gonna give her this information and she seeks him out – she’s dead and I’m dead. I can die knowing she’s okay, but to know he could harm her, I won’t let it happen.”
Deacon’s hands grip my hips and he holds me close. “I’ll lay down my life before I let that happen. You’re not alone, Tempest. Giving her the information doesn’t give her access to the man. Giving her the truth gives her power in a powerless situation.”
“It’s not as easy as you think. On paper, he seems harmless, a hero almost.”
He guides us to the couch never letting me go. When he sits down, he pulls me on his lap.
While I am twisted in knots over Arika knowing the truth, I find comfort in being so close to Deacon.
“Tell me about her mother.”
I relax and fall against his chest resting my head on his shoulder while he casually trails his hand up and down my jean covered thigh.
“Stephanie was my best friend. We did everything together. In high school, she fell in love with a boy.”
“Did you have a high school sweetheart, Tempest?” Deacon asks and it soothes me that he wants to know about me as much as Arika.
“No, I was too worried about school and Stephanie. I don’t know how to explain it, but I just always felt like her protector.”
“Tell me about the boy.”
“Shawn, well he was great. Honestly, from the beginning, he never pushed her for sex. He waited till she was ready. He was gentle, loving, and what they had was real back then.”
“So what changed?” Deacon still casually strokes my thigh and I find I like it more than I should considering this is the man who has given his word to Arika to turn my life upside down.
“Shawn joined the Navy.”
I feel Deacon tense under me.
“He was fine until he was selected to become a SEAL. He did the training. He went on a mission. That’s where things get confusing for everyone.”
Deacon stops tracing my thigh and shifts forcing me to lift my head to face him. “What happened, I want every detail. Then I want his full name, date of birth, and if you have it his social security number.”
With hot tears flowing down my face, I blow out a breath. “I can give you one better. I can tell you where he is.”
Deacon pulls back causing me to lift my head. His expression is one I can’t read. “You’ve known her whole life where he is and haven’t allowed her to see her father.”
I see the judgment in his eyes. His assumption is I am the bad guy here. This is why I don’t tell people who Arika really is. Everyone wants to protect Shawn’s rights. Well, what about Stephanie’s?
“He’s been in military prison for involuntary manslaughter. Excuse me for not telling the world and crushing her dreams that he’s some nice guy.” I try to pull away from him, but he keeps me in place.
“A SEAL committed manslaughter?”
I nod my head. “Shawn Callahan went from a soft boy into a weapon created by the government for special operations. Only they didn’t have control over him when he came home. The casualty was Stephanie.”
“And they said it wasn’t intentional or it was a plea deal? A SEAL is trained to make every move every fucking breath be with intention. The involuntary part doesn’t fit what we are trained to do. I need more details. This just doesn’t fit what was engrained into his mindset as a SEAL.”
My heart drops. “Please, Deacon, please don’t try to explain away what he did like this was somehow Stephanie’s fault. She was so afraid. So scared of him. Her only wish was to have her baby and let her be free from the man Shawn became.”
“Forgive me for upsetting you further, but Tempest, you and Stephanie gave this man no choice, no chance to be in his child’s life. You made this decision for him. What if it was just what he needed to balance what he had to do for his country?”
“He didn’t want the baby. I heard him tell Stephanie he’s killed kids before and was going to kill their kid. He was angry because Stephanie said she was stillborn. He was angry, he wasn’t the one to kill the baby.”
My stomach churns reliving the last moments I heard of my best friend’s life.
“They have facilities. Specialists. All she had to do was reach out.” He seems distraught and I wonder if it’s because he was a SEAL.
“They weren’t married. She tried and she was shut down because she was his girlfriend not his wife. When she called his commander, she was told Shawn denied their relationship all together.”
“Full name,” Deacon clips out obviously frustrated with me. “I will be honest with you always, Tempest Mae Adams – even when you won’t like it – I will be honest. I think I know Arika’s dad personally.”
“Shawn Michael Callahan.”
“Date of birth?”
“April eleventh, nine-teen, eighty.”
“Need a computer.” Deacon says gently pushing me off his lap.
I decide not to argue or talk. Deacon is a man on a mission. Going to the den, I lift my laptop off my desk and take it to him.
“Deacon, do whatever you feel you need to, but you need to know we’re done.” I blow out a breath.
This kills me inside in a way I never thought possible. Deacon looks at me wide-eyed in shock, but doesn’t speak.
“You’re tearing my life apart because you have some honor code you want to live by. I respect it. I understand it. Under different circumstances, I might even find it to be another reason I could fall for you. This though, Shawn will make sure Arika is in casket in the ground, or her ashes spread beside her mother’s.
“I can deal with Arika hating me. I can take her words. As long as she is alive, I can deal with acid running through her veins towards me. What I can’t do … I can’t fail her mother more than I already have. I can’t let him get to her. So, Deacon do what you need to. It was a nice break when I had it. I’ll hold onto the memories, but we are done.”
He closes the distance between us and locks his eyes onto mine. “Oh beautiful, we are far from done! Knowledge is power. I’m going to know all there is to know about this man so I can keep you and Arika safe. I understand why you want to protect her. I understand your fears. I also think I know this man personally. And if that’s the case and he is who I think he is, I know what broke him. I can’t leave a frogman helpless, but I give you my word I won’t let him hurt you or your daughter. Ever.”
“Deacon, it’s not that simple.”
“Sometimes, Tempest, it is if you let it be.”