Chapter 15

~ Danny ~

Present Day

 

 

Over the next few weeks, I made sure to spend at least one day a week with Dani, and the effort was paying off. She was warming up, accepting me much quicker than I would have ever guessed. It amazed me that this cheerful, beautiful little girl was my daughter, bringing a happiness into my life I never thought possible.

Now, I had to work on her mother. Gabrielle remained skittish around me, wary and uncomfortable, and I fucking hated it. I needed her to see me in a different light, see I had grown as a person, so I scheduled a day outing with both of them.

Pulling into the lot a few minutes after the agreed upon time, Gabrielle parked her small compact next to mine, her car dwarfed by my black Hummer with dark tinted windows that prevented anyone from seeing inside. My crew sat in two big SUVs parked in the surrounding spaces, and Big T climbed out of one of the other vehicles and strode over.

“Hi, Teddy,” I heard her say with a smile in her voice as she opened the back door, waiting for Dani to climb out.

“Hey, hey, ladies. Looking nice, looking nice.” Big T stepped over to my Hummer to open both doors on the passenger side before turning with a grand sweep of his arm. “Your chariot awaits.”

Dani giggled as she clamored up and Gabrielle glanced through the front door, spotting me behind the wheel. She jerked in surprise before a small smile curved her lips.

“Hi. Where are you taking her?”

“Not just her. Get in.”

Her brows creased. “Where are we going?”

“Just get in, would ya?” I turned in my seat, waiting for her to climb, and smiled at Dani. “Hey, cutie. How are you?”

“I’m good.” She leaned back in the booster seat I had purchased for her, allowing Big T to fasten the seat belt across her.

“Good. You ready to go?”

She nodded, and I put the car in gear and pulled out, the caravan of cars following close.

“Where are we going?” Gabrielle repeated.

“Would you just sit back and relax? Let it be a surprise.”

“Why would you want to surprise me?” Genuine confusion covered her expression.

“Damn, you’re impossible, girl. You never used to be this hard to please.”

“Danny—”

“Stop,” I pleaded in a low voice. “Please, let me do this.”

Stopped short by my tone, she gave me a small smile, which I returned. “You look very nice,” I said.

She glanced down at her simple yellow shirt and jean shorts. “Thanks, I guess.”

I wanted to tell her she was always beautiful, but I lost the thought when Dani shouted from the backseat.

“Dad!”

Taken by surprise, Gabrielle and I stared at each other, this being the first time Dani had called me Dad. I clenched my jaw tight, a huge rock of emotion clogging my throat, as I fought to compose myself before making eye contact with her through the rearview mirror. I coughed, but my voice still sounded hoarse. “What, baby?”

“Is that a Xbox under the seat?”

I grinned. “Yep, it is. You want to play something?”

She cheered, laughing in excitement as I reached to pull down the small TV from the ceiling at the next stop light. I leaned over to open the glove box in front of Gabrielle, brushing the back of my hand against her bare leg. She tried to act like it was no big deal, but I spotted the goose bumps rising in response. She wasn’t fooling me.

While I took my time sorting through the choices, she turned in her seat, trying to be discreet as she angled herself away from me. I noticed, however, and after selecting an age-appropriate game, I slammed the door shut and grazed my hand along her smooth leg again, my eyes never leaving her face, before handing the disc to Dani. Gabrielle flushed and her lips parted as if she wanted to say something, but the light changed, and I turned my attention back to the road; not before I saw what I wanted, though. She still reacted to me, which gave me hope of turning things around with us.

We rode in silence, except for small squeals from the backseat as Dani played the car racing game, but the further we drove, the landscape became all too familiar, and I could tell when Gabrielle figured out our destination.

“Danny, where are we going?” she asked, even though I knew she knew.

“A special place we used to like to go.”

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. “I’m not sure it’s a good place to take her.”

“Why not? You ashamed of where you’re from?”

“No, it’s not that. I want her safe and the last time I checked, that area wasn’t.”

“It was safe enough for you.”

“That’s different. Look,” she interrupted when I opened my mouth to reply, “I’m only looking out for our daughter, that’s all.”

I stared at her for a second and then shook my head. Leaning an elbow on the door, I covered my mouth with my hand before turning back. “Do you really think I’d take her someplace not safe?”

“Well, no…” she stated, but I heard the uncertainty in her voice.

“You don’t sound too certain about that.” I tried not to feel offended. This perception of me was my doing, so it was up to me to change. She wasn’t upsetting me on purpose, and I understood she was only protecting our daughter, but she needed to learn that Dani was now also my top priority. I wasn’t a fucking idiot.

“Danny, I don’t think you’d intentionally put her in danger, but you know how things go.”

“And I’m well prepared for that.”

She glanced over her shoulder to make sure Dani was still too engrossed in her game to be listening to us. “Do you have a gun in the car?” she hissed.

I wasn’t going to lie, and gave a small nod to the center console sitting between us. At the next light, I leaned close to her and lowered my voice. “It’s locked, so you don’t need to worry about it, but it’s nice to know you think so highly of me that I’d be fucking careless about something like that.”

“Danny, stop.”

“Well, come on, G. Give me some fucking credit. I wasn’t even referring to that. I meant all the people following us, in case you haven’t fucking noticed. They’re there for a reason, not to inflate my ego.”

“Would you quit swearing?” She glanced over her shoulder again.

“She’s not listening, she’s playing the game. She’s fine.”

“I know your past, and hopefully it isn’t following you around anymore. That’s all I’m saying.” Gabrielle turned and crossed her arms, staring out the passenger window and putting an end to the conversation.

“That’s all you’re saying, huh?” I shook my head and looked away. “That’s all you’re saying.”

I didn’t push further, but kept an eye on her face as I turned into the park. When she noticed, she sat up in her seat. “Oh my God,” she whispered.

One of the first things I did when I made money was identify places in the community in which to give back. Since this park held so much meaning, as Gabrielle and I had spent a lot of our time here when we were dating, this was the first place into which I poured my donations. I gave the city enough to clean up the area and add multiple jungle gyms. The big open spaces became soccer fields, baseball diamonds, and basketball courts.

Kids ran everywhere while families enjoyed picnics or sitting and relaxing next to the water. Numerous streetlamps lined the parking lot, preventing it from being plunged into complete darkness at night, as it had when I had frequented the place. I parked and watched as her eyes bounced around, taking in everything. Her reaction made my heart smile since I’d had her in mind while doing this, but her assumptions still pissed me off.

I leaned my back against the car door and arched a brow. “This safe enough?”

“Oh my God, Danny. How did they do all this? Where did they get…?” She stopped and gaped at me. “You did this, didn’t you? You gave them the money to do this.”

I gave her a steady gaze before turning and smiling at Dani. “You ready, baby?”

 

~ Gabrielle ~

 

Danny opened the door and climbed out as my eyes followed him around the front of the car. To look at him, you’d think he hadn’t changed. He still wore his standard attire of jeans, riding low, tennis shoes, and a t-shirt, but everything was top quality, new, and clean, rather than worn and ratty. On his wrist sat a big, chunky platinum watch I didn’t even want to know the price of, when there’d been nothing before, and more tattoos decorated his muscular forearms. His hair was now a skull cut, still as black as the night, but he looked healthy, fit, and immaculate in his appearance. He still moved with the same slow demeanor, as if he didn’t have a care in the world, even though he missed nothing. His mirrored sunglasses hid his eyes from view, but I knew the intensity I would see behind them.

Everything appeared the same, except for he was someone now. He walked the streets, and everyone knew him by name, wanted to talk to him, touch him, and be near him. He was such a private person, the attention most likely drove him crazy, but he would deal with it, understanding it as the price of success—and the money. Unlike others, however, he was putting his earnings to good use, and I was more touched than I wanted to admit.

To survive these visits with him, I needed to believe he was still running with the wrong crowd, making bad decisions, and just an outright jerk now that he was a mega-star, but it wasn’t true and would never be. That had been the common misconception about him when we’d dated; everyone warning me to stay away from him, assuming he was bad news and corrupted down to the bone, but he was good with a big heart, even if he didn’t always show it, believing the disclosure made him weak.

I climbed out of the car and followed behind the two of them as they made their way to a field, away from everyone else, where Big T waited with a bright red kite. Danny held his daughter’s little hand in his as he talked to her and she listened to whatever he was saying before they took off in a sprint, leaving me with Dani’s high-pitched giggle on the breeze.

I continued behind at a slow pace, enjoying the warmth from the sun on my skin. Everything was so different, but the park still held its charm and a special place in my heart. I stopped at the edge of the field, the wind blowing my hair around, and watched as they ran, trying to get the big kite to take flight. It took a few tries before catching and soaring high, the colorful face standing proud against the bright blue sky.

They pulled the kite along, Danny positioned behind our daughter, holding onto the spool with her, fighting against the drag and steering it higher and higher, when it veered to the right at a sharp angle. I followed the kite’s path until I caught something out of the corner of my eye, causing me to turn and gasp.

I walked to the point of the peninsula, toward the water and the bench, where he’d taken me on our first date and told me he loved me for the first time. But it wasn’t the bench, the water, or even the city skyline in the distance catching my interest; instead, it was a beautiful gazebo sitting at the water’s edge. I stepped in, letting my fingers run across the smooth, cool wood. The structure was square rather than round, and a single bench sat in the middle, while boxes lined every railing and overflowed with flowers in a bright shock of pinks, whites, reds, and purples. Two kids played inside, but when I approached, they scurried off, leaving me alone.

The temperature was cooler under the cover of the roof and I sat, letting the fresh air pass over me, bringing with it the sweet scent of the surrounding Geraniums and Impatiens. I closed my eyes and tried to control the flow of memories of our first date flooding my mind—the first kiss, the declarations of love. I had truly believed we would last forever. How naïve I’d been.

I felt his presence behind me even though he hadn’t made a sound. I turned and smiled. “This is beautiful.”

Danny said nothing as he sat beside me, removing his sunglasses, but keeping his gaze over the water.

“Do you still come out here?” I asked, and then chuckled. “That’s a stupid question, sorry.”

“Why is it stupid?”

“Why?” I nodded toward the picnic area behind us a few hundred feet away, but close enough for people to realize who sat in the gazebo, and they stared.

He shrugged as he studied the ground. “Yeah…well maybe it isn’t as easy as it was, but yeah, I still sometimes come out here. At night,” he added.

“Oh.” I was unsure what more to say as uneasy tension fell between us. I fought against the desire to give in and fall back under his spell, which would be easy to do if I allowed myself to surrender. “Where’s Dani?” I asked, changing the subject to safe territory.

“Flying the kite with T. She’s fine.”

We sat together in silence, before I broke it, uncomfortable with the leftover strain from our argument in the car. “I’m sorry, Danny. I didn’t mean to imply you hadn’t changed at all. It’s just, I’d heard about…well, I can see it isn’t true.”

He leaned back and grinned. “You’re forgiven.”

“That easy, huh?”

“That easy because you’re right. I haven’t changed that much, or at least I hope I haven’t. I’m still this punk kid from the streets and I don’t ever want to forget that. It’s made me who I am. All the other stuff…” He waved his hand and shook his head. “It was stupid, and it wasn’t me. I let things get out of control, and even though I had my reasons, it’s no excuse.”

“What were your reasons?” I wanted to kick myself for asking, but I was curious about the Danny who sat next to me, if I would recognize the old Danny within him.

He studied me for a second, but then shook his head again. “That’s for another day, but my point is, I would like to think I can put who I am now to good use and make the right decisions because I have something I never had.”

“What’s that?”

“Choices. I never had choices, no options, nothing. But now I have loads of them, and I want to give that to Dani. I want her to have the choices and chances I never did.”

My heart swelled. “That’s sweet.”

“I’m not saying it to be sweet, G. I’m saying it because I’m her father and it’s my responsibility to do that for her. I want to do it for her. I want to be there for her. I want her in my life more than one day a week.”

I swallowed and averted my eyes. “I understand, and you should be.”

Danny saw how hard this was for me and didn’t press further, for which I was thankful. “We’ll figure something out. I need to straighten some shit out first, but once I do, we’ll figure out a plan.”

I nodded again, but said nothing as I studied my fingernails as if they were the most interesting things ever. I tried not to get upset, telling myself I knew this conversation would happen one day, but despite attempting to prepare myself, I wasn’t ready.

Also, the gut-clenching hurt knowing he didn’t want me as part of his life was humiliating, and I told myself to stop, mad I would be stupid enough to think it. I needed to be happy for Dani, who now could have a relationship with her father, and I needed to keep my personal feelings out of it.

“You know,” Danny said, breaking into my thoughts. “I designed this myself.”

“You did? Wow.” I peered around again. “It’s gorgeous, and this is the perfect spot for it.”

He gave me a crooked smile. “Do you remember the one time we came out here, and I carved into the bench?”

I laughed as I remembered how horrified I’d been as he defaced the wood by carving our names into it before surrounding them with a heart, so certain the police would come and arrest us for destruction of property. I glanced over my shoulder to the bench sitting outside the gazebo. “Did they replace it?”

“No.” He slid over, revealing the heart and our names, clear as day, if only faded with time.

My fingers traced the engraving as my heart warmed with an emotion I hadn’t experienced in so, so long. “Oh…”

“I asked them to move the bench in here. This is what I wanted to capture with the gazebo.” His fingers reached out and trailed behind mine.

I glanced up and found his sharp blue eyes looking at me with their usual intensity. My breath caught in my throat and I trembled as I always did whenever trapped in his powerful gaze.

Jerking to my feet, I gave him a wobbly smile and stepped away, needing space. “That was nice of them. I’m sure they’ll want to keep all mementos of the hometown star. I should get back to Dani,” I prattled.

He walked over, stopping me with a hand on my arm. “Wait. I want to ask you something.” I took a small step back from him and waited. “What did Dani mean when she said you didn’t dance?”

I swallowed. I didn’t want to go into the full, sordid details. “She doesn’t know I used to dance.”

“What? Why not?”

“It was easier that way.”

“Why aren’t you dancing, Gabrielle?”

 

~ Danny ~

 

Her eyes flicked up to mine, and something flashed in them before she buried it away again. “Choices. Just like you said, Danny. I had to make a choice, and I made it.”

She brushed past me to head back toward the field and I didn’t stop her. I sighed before I grabbed my sunglasses and shoved them on, swallowing against the guilt surging through me. Yet again, something else to add to the list of how I’d fucked up Gabrielle’s life. I wondered if there would ever be an end to that list, or if it was my destiny to screw things up for her forever. I leaned on the railing, trying to figure out how I could fix things—if they could even be fixed—before pushing off from the wood beam.

I attempted to ignore the people standing around watching and overlook the fact some of them were taking pictures with their cell phones. This was my life, whether I liked my celebrity status or not, and I couldn’t change it. One thing I didn’t have to accept, however, was not having Gabrielle in my life anymore.

The more I was around her and Dani, the more I realized this was what I’d been missing and what I’d been searching for, but looking in all the wrong places. I wanted the love of my life back, my soul mate, and I wanted my family. I may not have known about Dani, but once I’d found out, my focus and priorities shifted, and it was all I wanted now. That, and Gabrielle. I wanted her more than anything I could remember. Time hadn’t changed my feelings for her, instead only strengthening them, and I’d been stupid to believe I could have ever lived without her and still be happy. I was getting my shit together and getting her back was now my number one priority. This was what mattered, what everybody wanted in life; the stuff money couldn’t buy, and I wasn’t going to let it slip away.

I glanced once more at our bench and made a vow to get her back. I would have my family and my girl, no matter what it took. We only had to get through the ugliness of what I did before we could have forever, as I always promised we would.

But first, I had to deal with Dollar. Just like before, he wasn’t on the same page as me when it came to Gabrielle, and now Dani, but unlike before, this time I didn’t give a fuck what he thought. I was only doing what I wanted, and he could go fuck himself if he didn’t like it.