Chapter 15

Abigail

I was surprised when Ian called after work with the suggestion that he bring home dinner and we watch a movie. At first, it had sounded almost like a date. I wondered if maybe Zach had talked to him and said that if we wanted to fake an engagement, he’d better start acting like a better boyfriend or something.

But then I remembered that Zach didn’t want me to have anything to do with Ian, not in that sense. He thought Ian was too old for me even for a fake engagement.

I rolled my eyes at the thought of it.

Once I’d realized this was all Ian’s idea, it was pretty easy to figure out his motive. He no doubt figured that dinner and a movie would open me up to the possibility of having sex with him. He didn’t want to just come right out and say that he wanted to fuck me, so he’d hidden it under the guise of just hanging out together.

Even though that morning, I’d been thinking it was time to nip this in the bud, I found myself agreeing. I didn’t really feel like going out and getting drinks with Brittany, especially since we’d just gone out for drinks the night before. Brittany was just trying to get me to spill the beans about me and Ian. She thought that if she got me drunk enough, I’d confess my undying love for him or something. I wasn’t falling for it.

I didn’t really know why I was keeping this thing with Ian a secret from my best friend. After all, if anyone was going to be supportive of it, it was Brittany. But I guessed I was afraid that the more people who knew about this, the more likely it was that Zach would find out.

I didn’t know how to feel when Ian brought up his training session with Jason. From the way he said it, it almost sounded like he wanted me to get back together with Jason. Was that what they were all hoping for, Ian and Zach and Mom? They wanted me to settle down and get married to someone my own age? My old boyfriend of two years?

I didn’t want that, though. Didn’t they realize that?

Fortunately, Ian had let the matter drop. He’d been sweet to me all evening, bringing home food and then putting it all away while I finished my disappointing search through the classifieds. Even though I knew we probably needed to have a talk, to cut this roomies-with-benefits thing short, my mind insisted there was no harm in having one last night together. I’d go sleep in my own bed afterward, I promised myself. I’d make sure I wasn’t getting too used to waking up in his bed.

When he pulled me into his arms, cuddling me, I couldn’t protest.

It felt good there, safe. I knew instinctively that he wasn’t going to let Jason bother me. If nothing else, he was a good friend. Not my best friend, but a good friend.

I had a difficult time concentrating on the movie, though. I couldn’t stop thinking about how warm Ian’s chest was and how I could feel his firm muscles under my cheek where it rested against the soft fabric of his shirt. I started to feel embarrassed about the fact that I wasn’t wearing anything under my sweats. All my things were in the laundry at the moment, and I hadn’t expected things to progress like they had that evening.

When I shifted against him, I could feel how hard he was, and I realized he wasn’t concentrating on the movie any more than I was. That was what made up my mind.

“You know, I’m not wearing anything under these sweatpants.”

Ian drew in a sharp breath, and instantly, his eyes went ten shades darker with lust. “Oh really?” he asked, his voice husky.

I grinned up at him and then slid away from him, resting on my knees in between his legs. I gave him a questioning look even though I knew I already had his permission. Then I slowly dragged the fabric of his pants and boxers out of the way. His cock, already hard, sprang free. I lowered my mouth to it, flicking my tongue out experimentally, tasting the bead of precum that rested on the tip.

Ian made a strangled noise, and I grinned, feeling powerful and sexy. It was my turn to tease him a little. I lapped at just his head, popping it into my mouth and sucking, tonguing his slit. Then I pulled away, blowing a soft breath across the sensitive skin, grinning again as he groaned.

I lowered myself, taking him farther into my mouth, pressing my tongue onto the vein along the underside of his cock. I swallowed around him, sucking as hard as I could, using my hand to jerk what I couldn’t fit in my mouth. With my other hand, I massaged his balls, rolling them in my palm, stroking the velvety skin.

I began to bob my head, dragging my lips along his shaft, moving first slowly and then quickly, keeping pressure by hollowing my cheeks. Ian’s hand came to rest on the back of my head, guiding me but without any real pressure, letting me set the pace.

I fluttered my tongue against his slit again, and I could tell he was getting close based on how much precum had gathered there. Sure enough, only a minute later, he caught me by the arms and pulled me toward him and into a deep kiss. I pouted a little; I’d wanted him to finish inside my mouth. But then he slid his hand into my sweats, pushing his fingers deep inside me, and I forgot all about that.

I was practically dripping by this point, my folds damp and ready. His fingers glided inside me, his initial strokes tentative and gentle before they became rough and quick. I gasped, rocking down onto his hand, my whole body in tune with what he was doing to me.

He continued fingering me as he bit a line of kisses along my neck and down to my collarbone. Every little movement of his body against mine made my nerves sing with fire. He could make me come just like that, I was sure, with just his fingers and his mouth.

But he was impatient, too.

We both stood up as if on cue and started stripping off our clothing, letting it fall to the floor. Ian pushed me down onto the couch, covering my body with his. He quickly tugged on a condom and immediately thrust inside me. I groaned, bringing my hands up and clutching the arm of the couch for support.

Suddenly, Ian halted his rapid thrusting, leaving me breathless and aching for more. He slid slowly in and out of my body, forcing me to feel the drag of his head against my inner walls. I had already been so close to the brink, and now everything felt so intense: the press of his dick inside me, the soft kiss he placed on the pulse point on my neck, the way his hands gripped my wrists, holding them above my head. He stared down into my eyes, something deep and serious in his gaze.

The pace of his thrusts began to build again until he was snapping his hips against mine with the force of a piston, in and out and in and out. My eyes fell shut, and I cried out as each thrust rattled through my burning core. In that instant, I lost track of who was who; we blended together in perfect harmony, our bodies moving as one.

He moved his hands to grip the arm of the couch, pushing against it, and I reached for him, pulling him closer, clinging to him. I came harder than I had ever come before, totally losing track of myself, of time, of what Ian was doing. I was just coming in wave after wave of pleasure, entirely overwhelmed. I collapsed into the couch, totally relaxed and sated with Ian still hanging over me, a warm and welcome weight.

I blinked my eyes open at the same time Ian did. He stroked a hand lightly down the side of my face and then pressed a gentle kiss to my forehead. “You okay?” he asked.

I giggled and pushed him off me. “Yeah, I’m okay,” I told him. “Better than okay.” I stretched hugely and then yawned. “I think I’m going to head to bed, though.”

I wasn’t really that tired, and I’d probably do a bit more job searching before I went to bed, but I didn’t want to make things awkward between us, and I didn’t want Ian to think I was going to pass out in his arms again or anything like that.

Roomies with benefits. I had to remember that.

Ian and I said good night, and I headed into my room, closing the door carefully but firmly behind me. For a minute, I leaned against it. I still felt caught up in the orgasm, and I wanted nothing more than to go back out there and cuddle some more. But that wasn’t the kind of relationship Ian and I had. It was just sex, nothing more.

Could we keep on doing this? For the first time, I started to think about the complications beyond Zach and my family and Jason. Could I keep on having sex with Ian without getting attached to him? Like Brittany had said, I’d had a crush on him for a while now. He was a good guy.

I shook my head. As long as I knew there was no future for us, and as long as I retreated to my own bed after we had sex, I could keep myself from falling in love with him.

Couldn’t I?