Ava

Jake tenses, and I frown. “Is that Levi?” I ask.

“I think so.” Jake sweeps a kiss across my lips. “I’ll be right back.”

I nod, and he studies my face for a final beat. When Levi pounds again, Jake climbs off the bed and tugs on his jeans, not bothering to zip them. He grabs a hotel robe from the closet and tosses it to me with a wink before he rounds the corner to get the door.

I scramble off the bed and pull on the robe. I try to listen, but I can’t make out their murmurs until Jake says, “Okay. I’ll meet you in the lobby.”

Funny. Two minutes ago, I was naked and rocking under Jake, but when he comes back around the corner and gathers his shirts off the floor, I feel awkward and self-conscious. His shoulders are tense, and stress is written all over his face.

“Mom’s in the hospital.” He tugs his undershirt on over his head.

I blink, and my worries about me and Jake fizzle away, replaced with concern for Kathleen. “What happened?”

“She fell—broke her ankle and hit her head pretty good. Shay found her passed out on the floor in her bathroom. They’re still in the ER, but they’re getting Mom a room.” He tugs on his shirt, but he doesn’t look at me. He’s already on his way home.

My heart swells and aches all at once. Some guys would call to check in and then crawl back into bed, but this is Jake. Steadfast. Loyal. Reliable. He’s there for his family whether they need him there or not, and if there’s anything he can do to help, he will.

And he’s the same for me.

Shivering, I tighten the robe around me.

“Ellie and Colton will take you home so you don’t have to miss your brother racing.”

“Sure.”

Jake throws his toothbrush and outfit from the track into his bag and zips it up before turning to me. He’s been all business since Levi left, but his expression softens as his eyes meet mine. “Hey.” He drops the bag and comes around to my side of the bed. He cups my jaw in his hand as he studies me. “Are you okay?”

I shiver again. “I’m fine.”

His lips quirk, but there’s no humor in his eyes. “You only say that when you’re not.” He strokes the back of his hand up the side of my neck. “I’m sorry I have to go. I promise I’ll make it up to you.”

“I know you will.” Because that’s who you are. The back of my eyes sting with tears, and I just want him to leave before I cry. “I hope Mom’s okay,” I whisper.

He closes his eyes and leans his forehead against mine. “Me too.”

Then his mouth is on mine, gentle at first, before turning coaxing and deeper, and when he pulls away we’re both breathless, both staring at each other. Am I the only one who has some thinking to do, or has he been rocked by tonight as well?

“I’ll text you when we get back to Jackson Harbor,” he says softly. “Try to have fun tomorrow.”

I don’t trust myself to speak, so I nod. He sweeps a final kiss across my lips before slinging his bag over his shoulder and heading out the door.

I listen to the heavy door click closed and crawl into bed, where I draw my knees to my chest and squeeze my eyes shut.

Jake offered to give me a child because that was what I wanted. I was going to let him because my wish to be a mother made me blind to my own selfishness, and maybe more than that. Maybe on some level I knew I wanted the nights with Jake too. But suddenly, I’m greedy for more.

Ava

Five years ago . . .

Looking my fiancé in the eye isn’t easy. I told him that Jake kissed me, that Jake said he was in love with me. That confession alone wouldn’t have been so bad, but I’m a full-disclosure kind of girl. When I told him, I confessed that I kissed Jake back, that I felt something I shouldn’t feel.

Harrison looks at me differently now, and tonight the questions in his eyes mirror the questions in my heart. I slide the steaks onto plates and toss sliced tomatoes, peppers, and olives into the salad.

Harrison is very traditional, and he waits at the dinner table while I serve. He’s said that’s how he was raised, and he always thought there was something special in the way his mom treated his father. He believes that’s the secret to their lasting marriage. When I saw his mother in action, I decided I’d give Harrison the same treatment she gave her husband. Tonight, however, having him watch me as I bring the plates and bowls to the table, I feel less like the adored spouse and more like the chastised servant.

That’s just your guilty conscience, Ava.

When all the food is on the table and I’m finally in my seat, he pours me a glass of wine.

“Have you thought any more about a wedding date?” he asks.

“Maybe we shouldn’t set one yet.” My voice gets caught on the emotion in my throat and hitches, and then my eyes fill with hot tears. I love Harrison, and I’m so angry at Jake right now for ruining days that should be full of excitement and celebration. I’m also mad at myself. If those old feelings hadn’t come rushing to the surface the second his mouth came down on mine, I’d have been able to brush this off. I’d be planning my wedding right now instead of hurting the man I love.

“Because of Jake?” Harrison asks.

I shrug. We both know the answer to that question.

“Ava, I love you,” he says. “And I thought you loved me.”

“I do!” My chest squeezes. “Of course I do. But if I have feelings, I should . . . It’s not fair to you.”

“He’s manipulating you to control you.”

I blink at Harrison. That doesn’t sound like Jake at all.

Harrison rubs the back of his neck and leans back in his chair. “I didn’t want to upset you, baby, but maybe you need to know. After you told me what happened, I confronted Jake.”

“You did?”

His eyes meet mine, and he nods slowly. “He kissed my girl. I couldn’t do nothing.”

“Harrison, what did you do?”

He draws in a long breath. “I didn’t hurt him. Don’t worry.” He shakes his head and looks away. “I went to the bar, ready for a fight. I was so angry. I called him on what he did. What he said to you. And do you know what he said to me?”

My heart is in my throat. I haven’t talked to Jake since I sent him away three days ago. “What did he say?”

“He said you were his best friend, but his feelings stopped there. He told me you are nothing more than a sister to him, but he’d have said anything to you to keep you from marrying me.” He holds up a hand. “I’m not discrediting your feelings, but I think you need to understand his.”

Nothing more than a sister. My gut twists around the blade of those words, and the pain makes my breath shudder.

“I’m not saying he doesn’t have feelings for you, but I don’t think they’re the feelings you want him to have,” Harrison says. “Before you break my heart and walk away from our life together, I want you to think about the fact that this guy never looked at you twice before I put a ring on your finger. I want you to think about his words. He admitted he’d have said anything to you to keep you from marrying me. What kind of friend is that, Ava? Are those the words of a man going after the woman he loves, or are those the words of a selfish child who thinks his playmate is being taken away?”

The blade twists again and again in my stomach until there’s nothing left. I feel empty inside, hollowed out. I push my plate away. My appetite is gone. “How can you still want to marry me after all this?” I ask. “I love you, Harrison, but I don’t want to misrepresent what I’m feeling right now.”

“You’re confused,” he says.

I nod. Hot tears roll down my cheeks. I’m so confused.

His chair squeaks against the tiled floor as he pushes it back and steps to my side of the table. He turns my seat so I’m facing him but stops me when I try to stand. Lowering himself to his knees in front of me, he cups my face in his hands and looks up into my eyes. “We love each other,” he says. “I’m not going to pretend this hasn’t hurt me, but I don’t want to lose you either.”

My head bobbles as I nod. “I don’t want to lose you.”

His big thumbs swipe at my cheeks, wiping away my tears. “Then marry me, Ava. Set a date. Make me the happiest man in the world.”