Chapter 16
Vanessa
Let me state for the record, I usually didn’t care to give a man a blow job. But with Kyle, and it had nothing to do with my favorite bread spread flavoring him, I actually got off on it. Inexplicably, my nipples pebbled and my vagina clenched each time I took him to the back of my throat. Every groan from his lips when he bucked into my mouth drove me toward the same goal I drove him toward.
“Nessa, I don’t want to come in your mouth. I need to be inside of you.”
I wanted to keep going, but my lower half wanted what he did. Still, I needed to torture him just a little bit more. I gently grazed his balls with the tips of my fingers. Kyle tugged on my hair, but I didn’t let that deter me.
My cheeks hollowed against him as I slowly released him from my mouth. Not ready to leave my position of power, I puckered my lips, placed a kiss on the tip right before blowing a stream of air from crown to base and back up again.
I trailed kisses along his thighs and that sinful V. “You’re one sexy man.”
Kyle gripped the undersides of my arms and hoisted me up until I straddled him. “Ride me.”
Without thought, I lifted my hips and slid down on him one slow inch at a time. So much for having control. His hands held my hips as he guided me back and forth, up and down. When his hips bucked up, mine did the opposite. We were in perfect synchrony. At this point, I needed him to come. I wanted him to come.
Doing my best to move faster and end his torture was futile. Kyle flipped us over, pinned my hands above my head, and laced our fingers together. “You’re the most beautiful woman, Nessa.”
Time suspended. Our eyes locked, he brought his lips to mine, and kissed me sweetly. Kyle didn’t attempt to bring his tongue to meet mine, this kiss wasn’t passionate by any means… but it still managed to take my breath away. What started out as a frenzy all of a sudden turned intimate. It was opposite of every other kiss we shared, and it freaked me out.
Even when comparing the other times we had sex, it seemed savage in nature, animalistic. I wasn’t prepared for this. No… just no!
I unlinked our fingers to grip his jaw and push his face away, ignoring his annoyed expression. Screw sweet and slow. Instead, I increased my speed, thrusted hard against his hips, and chased what I wanted.
Kyle followed my lead, but his silence was enough to speak volumes. We were breaking rules left and right. The one rule I refused to break was falling for him.
His movements quickened, and I grabbed his tight ass. “Don’t stop, Kyle.”
He lifted his body, the muscles in his arms were taut, elbows stiff, and he pistoned his hips at a rapid pace. I tightened around him with my fourth orgasm of the night coiling inside me. When I looked up, the cords in his neck strained.
Our sweat slickened bodies moved together. He let out a guttural moan right as my pussy pulsed around his dick. We both reached our peak at the exact same moment. Exhausted, he pulled out, rolled away, and collapsed beside me. Kyle remained silent and still until he slowly left my bed and walked out of my room.
It had been a perfect night up until about five minutes ago. Then in the blink of an eye, things changed, sending our good time spinning off its axis and crashing to earth. The urge to say his name or ask him if he was okay hung heavy on my tongue.
Before I could get up, Kyle was back with a wet cloth in his hand. He sat next to me and gently swiped the cloth between my legs. I couldn’t get my brain to work to utter one single word as I watched him get up, step into his boxers, and once again leave my room.
The second time he returned, he resumed his position beside me, but the space between us sent a definite message as to where his frame of mind was. It was the first time since we started our arrangement that I felt uncomfortable in his presence, and something told me he felt the same way.
“Don’t feel bad if you want to leave.” I internally face-palmed over the most insensitive thing I could say after the silence that loomed like a storm cloud.
He turned his head to look at me. “Who said I wanted to leave? Unless you want me to.”
His eyes stayed pinned to mine, forcing me to glance away. “I’m tired.”
“Then you should go to sleep.”
“Kyle,” I sighed, exasperated with the conversation that hadn’t happened yet… but I knew it eminent. “We both agreed to the rules we put in place. Since we started this arrangement, we keep breaking them.”
The skin between his eyebrows creased. “Fuck the rules, Nessa. This has nothing to do with them and you know it.”
“Yes, it does. It has everything to do with them. We weren’t supposed to have sleepovers, yet we have. All we were supposed to do was fuck and have fun.”
“Excuse me for being confused, but I thought that’s what we just did. As far as sleeping over, if you want me to go, then I will.”
Kyle started to move, but I grabbed his wrist. “Just stay.”
“Are you sure? I wouldn’t want to be accused of being a rule breaker.” His annoyed tone made me realize that I sounded like a bitch.
“I’m sorry.” Without even giving him a peck on the cheek, I smiled weakly, turned over, and tried to ignore the pinching I felt in the center of my chest as I stared at the blank wall in my room.
“Good night, Nessa.”
Kyle
She had been in my arms for hours. When I woke to the feeling of her rolling over, I extended my arm as a silent invitation to her. Surprisingly, she nestled her body against mine with her cheek on my chest and her hand resting on my abs.
I didn’t want to move a muscle for fear I’d wake her. Maybe she wanted to fight what we had when she was awake, yet in her sleep she wanted what I did. Not that I was sure what that was, but having her in my arms felt right.
After the way we ended things last night, waking up with her in my arms, our bodies intertwined, and a peacefulness on her face wasn’t something I wanted to disturb.
Her long dark lashes fluttered on her cheeks before she opened her eyes. “Good morning.”
“Good morning. It’s much nicer waking up this way rather than you wanting to injure me.”
“How did I end up smothering you?” She tried to pull away, but failed when I tightened my hold. “Kyle. You couldn’t be comfortable all night.”
“I was once you fell asleep at least.” Her head twisted so she could look at my face. “What happened last night, Nessa?”
“Nothing. We had amazing sex, or I thought we did.”
“We did.” I wasn’t in the mood for her evasiveness. It was obvious she wanted to avoid the topic, just like she wanted to avoid me last night, which was why I pushed harder. “That’s not what I mean, and you know it.”
That time when she tried to distance herself, I let her. If getting her to talk meant letting her go, that’s what I would do. We’d been at this for long enough, and I could fill a thimble with all I knew about Vanessa Monroe.
“Talk to me,” I pushed.
She wrapped her arms around her knees and sighed. “I’m not from the talkers, Kyle. If you need to know something, you need to ask me.”
I sat up, mimicking her position. “What happened that sent you into a tailspin last night? I saw it. It was like a switch had been flipped. One minute you were present, the next you were a million miles away.”
Panic passed through her expression before it was replaced with a nervous energy. Self-consciously, she reached for the sheet that rested in a crumpled mess and dragged it closer to cover herself. Again, if that was what she needed to start communicating, I sat back to let it happen. But I wasn’t going to make this easier on her regarding my questions. At some point, she needed to be honest with me.
Of course I felt that I misread her, and instead of confusion over what we shared, maybe it was boredom. I thought about it long and hard, and I really didn’t know her well enough to distinguish between the two.
“I don’t know what you want me to say, Kyle. I like spending time with you, but I worry about the agreement between us…”
“Okay, we need to re-negotiate because it’s obvious you’re consumed by the rules.”
“That’s not true,” she quipped. “If I was, you wouldn’t be here right now.”
“Regardless, let’s talk about why you don’t want me to stay. Why would lying beside each other in a bed after fucking each other’s brains out be a deal breaker?” I gripped her chin and turned her head to force her to stare back at me. “Seriously, Nessa, this is ridiculous. I’m not afraid to say I want to know more about you. I have no idea who you are, except that you manage to bring me to my knees more than any other woman ever has. Add to that how much fun we have together, how we can laugh, and have the same sense of humor. You hate your job and envy mine. Your best friend is married to my best friend. That’s it. That’s all I know.”
“That’s all you need to know.”
“That’s bullshit. If we’re friends with benefits, when does the friends part kick in?” I got nothing but a blank stare that infuriated me. “I grew up in Canada, no siblings but a ton of cousins. My parents were successful, and I was given a privileged life. When I was young, I dreamt of playing professional hockey as much as an American boy dreamt of playing baseball. But as I got older, all I wanted was to get to the states. And when I was accepted to Yale, I practically ran across the border.
“The first two people I met once I arrived were Jude and Luca. It’s a miracle one of us, or all three, didn’t end up in jail at one point during our friendship. But I’d do anything for those two, as they would for me. They are the brothers I never had, and Brae is now part of my family as well.”
The entire time she listened, her eyes shimmered with emotion. “Jude was a huge help when I decided to finance my own company. His expertise enabled me to take my passion and turn it into the business it is today. I love Mexican food, love to travel, and every year I go home for Christmas and actually wear the god-awful sweater that my Aunt Betty knits for me.
“I’m from Canada, but I despise winter. I’m not a fan of the Yankees or the Rangers. Sadly, although I’m a great skater, I wasn’t good enough to play my favorite sport, hockey. However, I was a cheerleader at Yale just to meet the girls.”
“Get out!”
“Nope. It was a brilliant plan… until I dropped someone and was kicked off the squad two weeks in.” She curled her lips between her teeth to stop from laughing. “Go ahead, I had to endure plenty of ball-busting from Soren and Benedetto.” At that, she released a string of giggles. “I wasn’t always this fit and good looking. When I was younger, this stud was chubby, had braces, and fell victim to acne when puberty hit.”
“I find that hard to believe.”
“Trust me, I’ll show you pictures. So, what else can I tell you?”
“Stop. I get it. But we’re different, Kyle. I was never one to open up like you just did. It’s just the way I am.”
She watched as I nodded, considering her admission. “Okay. I get that. One thing, then. I just need to know one thing, and I’ll let you tell me the rest at your own pace.”
For a second I thought she was going to tell me no. And then she said, “My parents are divorced and can’t stand each other. That makes for an awesome Christmas, birthday, or any other life events that occur. I have a stepsister who quickly became my father’s favorite once he married her mother.” Her pause had me thinking she was done. I remained silent, and she continued. “My own mother is bitter, nasty, and hates men. Oh, and I was given a cute puppy on my tenth birthday. It was after they got divorced as a consolation prize. Only a few months later, he was hit by a car. The only thing I did have going for me in high school and college were my looks and sparkling personality, and both made me very popular for the wrong reasons. That pretty much sums things up.”
“Did that hurt to admit?”
“No.”
“Good. Maybe tomorrow you’ll tell me two more things,” I teased.
“Kyle, you know more about me than most of my friends do.” She jumped out of bed in a panic. “Oh, shit. Speaking of, they’re going to kill me.”
“Why?”
“I missed yoga. It’s because of me they are starting a new studio today.” Standing naked at the end of the bed with her phone in her hand, she frowned and shook her head. One thing she wasn’t was shy. “Fuck, I missed like ten messages.”
“Do you want to go to yoga?”
“Of course not. I hate it.”
“Then don’t go. Text your friends. You’re busy all day, you have the flu, whatever.” I reached for her, pulled her back to bed, and held her face. “Thank you.”
Her expression softened, and a smile played on her lips. “After I was a complete bitch to you last night, you’re thanking me?”
“Not a complete bitch. Shit, woman, I won’t be able to think of peanut butter the same way ever again. Speaking of peanut butter, I’m starving. After we fuck, I’ll take you out to eat and then we’re going grocery shopping.”
“How fun.” Her eyes rolled up and she added, “What then? Laundry?”
“No, not laundry.” Before she could respond, I bent my head and sucked on her bare nipple while gripping her ass. “There’s something I’ve always wanted to do.”
“I think I need more time to prepare for that,” she said, clenching her butt cheeks beneath my hand.
“Not that… but that’s coming. Something crazy and you’re just the person I want to do it with.” She didn’t look scared or worried. Instead, a slow smile spread, and in that moment I knew I had her back. “You’re just going to have to trust that I’ll blow your mind.”
“Okay, Mr. Cleary. Blow my mind.”