Chapter 15

“WHO was the top dog?” Bob asked as we shuffled into the back door of the bait room.

I held all the gear and Jason and Connor carried a large cooler between them. Connor cut his eyes toward me as they set down the chest and I opened it and pulled out a thirty-one-inch speckled trout.

“That would be me,” I said with a smile.

Bob nodded approvingly. “Nice.”

“That’s a girl’s luck,” Connor said. “We caught all the rest, she catches one and it’s the biggest.”

I laughed and pretended to toss it to him so he’d flinch. He smirked and backed up a little. I could tell he didn’t quite know what to make of me. And I knew Jason had no idea how to help with that.

“Connor did catch the most,” I said, smiling at him. “He is the croaker expert.”

“Nine of ’em,” he said, standing a little straighter. His hair poked up on top where he’d taken his cap off.

“Croaker—that’s good eating,” Bob said, looking in the cooler. “You got yourself a good haul, there.”

Connor beamed.

“Well, let’s get this haul cleaned so we can eat sometime tonight,” Jason said, heading to the big sink.

Connor grabbed the filet knife like he’d been doing it for years instead of two days. It was good, him being there. Good for him and good for Jason. The next day would not be good. I had the feeling moody Jason would be back in residence.

I stood awkwardly to the side. “Y’all need my help?”

Jason turned with a skeptical smirk. “Seriously?”

“No.”

He laughed. “Want your fish? We can do it first.”

I waved a hand. “Nah, just add it to your pile. Y’all enjoy.”

I turned to head down the hall to the storefront, but I heard a whisper. “Go ask her.”

It was Connor, and it made me look back. Jason was looking at him funny and then he cut his eyes toward me. I suddenly felt awkward again, and Jason looked stuck.

“You could come eat if you want,” Connor said, looking at me quickly, then back at the fish. “I mean, you did catch the biggest one and all. Kinda sucks to just go home now.”

“Connor,” Jason admonished.

“What?” he said, looking up at him. “Suck isn’t a bad word.”

I laughed to myself and walked back, taking a chance and giving Connor a sideways hug. He didn’t pull away but he didn’t look at me, either.

“Thank you, Connor, I appreciate that. But I have to go see what my family is up to tonight.”

He nodded. “Oh yeah. The girl with the boy name.”

I laughed. “Yeah, her.”

When I looked up to catch Jason’s eye, my laugh caught in my throat and made my skin tingle. The expression in his eyes was almost physical in its power. His son had invited me over. Relief, joy, happy. That’s what it was. His happy was showing. I licked my lips nervously and then got sidetracked again when his eyes dropped to watch that. Had to blink that away, and I gave Connor’s shoulders another squeeze.

“See you in the morning.”

“See ya.” His face went blank.

He was like Jason that way. Show a feeling. Take it away. Act like nothing matters.

THE next morning felt like coming home from a vacation. Depressing. Connor was moping and grumpy. Jason grunted one-word answers and his face was dark. I made my coffee and tried to make small talk.

“Well, how was my fish last night?”

“Awesome,” Connor said, flopping onto a stool. “Dad saved you some.”

“Oh cool.”

He fiddled with a zipper on his backpack. “I wish we could go fishing every day.”

I chuckled. “Nobody can do that, babe. That’s not reality. But you can probably go each time you come here. I’m sure your dad can swing that.” I hoped so, or I just sold him out.

He nodded. “Yeah, maybe.”

“I enjoyed it though,” I said. “Haven’t gotten to do that in years.”

“Really?” His face scrunched up in surprise. “Why not?”

I shrugged. “Just got busy, I guess. I should do better about that.”

“Wish I could stay for the festival,” he said, his eyes clouding again. “My mom is such—”

“Don’t finish that sentence, Connor.”

We both turned our heads as Jason entered the room.

“Sorry,” Connor whispered.

“Let’s just take this one visit at a time, okay?” Jason said, his expression softening. He put a hand in Connor’s hair. “Maybe she’ll let you come for longer next time. Before school starts.”

“Yeah.”

A car pulled up out front, and I knew by Jason’s face who it was. I took my coffee and went to the back to avoid the awkwardness. The minnows needed to be checked. I could do that. But shortly after the jingle, I heard steps behind me. I turned to see Connor stop a few feet from me.

“Hey—just wanted to say bye.”

I took a step forward and held out my right fist. His face relaxed and broadened into the smile that so resembled his dad’s, and he knocked his own fist against mine.

“See ya next time, Connor.”

“See ya.”

He ambled out, leaving me blinking and trying not to let that go to my heart. But when the bell jingled again, it did. For Jason. I walked slowly down that hall, not wanting to get there, slower with each step. Jason leaned against the counter, staring at the door.

I stayed back, suddenly unsure of my footing, not wanting to intrude. He heard me and swiped at his eyes as he turned away. I saw it morph in front of me—the moody withdrawn Jason I’d first met, with the tight jaw and angry eyes.

He busied himself with some papers, and I went to the computer to pull the tide report. Two clicks in, stupid hit me in the head. What was I doing? Exactly what I’d always done. Taken my cue from other people’s moods and wimped out. His back was to me when I turned around, so I watched him. Watched him operate on robot mode, shutting down all the parts of him that made my heart race.

“Hey.”

“Hmm,” he responded, not turning.

“Hey,” I repeated.

“What?”

I paused, but still he kept flipping through papers.

“Please look at me.”

He set down the papers with barely disguised irritation. I saw the man on the houseboat that told me to leave. Same guy. More clothing.

“Dani, it’s not a good time.”

“Yeah, I get that.” I walked the distance between us and put a hand on his arm. Feeling the tightness of him, like a spring bolt. His eyes flickered at my touch.

“I know you’re sad, Jason. It’s okay to be. Talk to me.”

He closed his eyes. “I don’t want to.”

I don’t know where the boldness came from, but I moved his arm so that I had access and wrapped my arms around him, holding tight. He didn’t move, didn’t respond, didn’t say a word, and I just shut my eyes tight and hoped like hell it wouldn’t backfire on me.

The doubt hit me like bullets. Was I being presumptuous? Did I cross a line? Did I feel more than he did? What did I know about losing a child? My head started to spin and I started to pull away—when his hands came up my back.

I held my breath as one slowly moved upward into my hair, as the other one pulled me tighter against him, so tight it was hard to breathe. But I didn’t care. I hugged him back, wanting to take the hurt. I felt his breathing quicken, as if maybe he was working not to cry, but I didn’t look up in case he was. I just let him take what he needed.

Several moments later, he moved his hands up to my face and lifted it to his. I caught a glimpse of reddened eyes before he kissed me soft and slow, long and deep, melting my insides and sending heat to important places. That kiss went on for days, it felt like. Till we heard a truck door creak shut outside and we pulled away, both of us in a hazy fog.

Jason backed away and disappeared down the hall as the bell jingled.

“I want some boudain balls. And shrimp on a stick. And cheesecake on a stick.”

Riley’s head was on a swivel, taking in all the food kiosks at the festival.

“Your mother was always about the cotton candy,” Dad said, pointing at a small girl smeared in sticky blue. “I always wished they’d make a white one. She’d always end up blue or pink.”

I handed her a twenty. “Take it one at a time, boog,” I said, glancing around. We’d been there for fifteen minutes and there was no sign of Jason. Not that I was really looking. Or worried about it.

“Ooh, funnel cake,” Riley said, sounding six instead of sixteen. Then she caught sight of Grady and Miss Olivia and waved.

Oh sure. She saw her man.

“Hey, Dani girl,” Miss Olivia said as she ambled closer. “Nathaniel, you look better every day.”

“Are you flirting with me?” he asked.

“Am I?” Miss Olivia chuckled. “It’s been so long, I have no idea.”

My dad laughed—a deep warm sound that instantly made me relax. Grady looped an arm around Riley and pulled her in for a hug. She hugged him back and then pulled back to stand next to him as her blue eyes scanned the crowd. No floor shows today.

Bob slow-rolled by in his golf cart, his head swinging from side to side, taking it all in. It was the first time I’d ever seen him with a shirt on, and he almost pulled off normal till he swung his metal leg out the side as a wave to me.

“Every year, it’s hot enough to fry eggs on the street, you hear me?” Miss Olivia said, fanning out her yellow-and-white muumuu.

I nodded and checked out the sky, the familiar thickness tickling my skin. A storm was brewing. The quickening of my pulse told me that. “It’s muggy, though. Air’s heavy.”

“Choke you if you breathe too deep.” Miss Olivia adjusted her straw hat. “Rain’s on the way, the weatherman said. Was supposed to be here early this morning, but it’s waiting, I guess,” she said, laughing. “Could blow this whole little party off the street. Y’all get something to eat yet?”

Yeah, it’s waiting. I closed my eyes for a second and breathed in the wet air. It was for me, somehow. I felt the energy of it on my skin.

“Not yet, but I’m working on it,” Riley said.

“Well, I’m going to see what’s happening on the fishing board,” Dad said, already heading toward the giant stat board used to track the tournament. And Jiminy, who nodded at him and said something they both chuckled at. The two of them slapped each other on the shoulders and ambled off together. My heart warmed instantly at the thought that maybe—just maybe—they were finding that place again.

“Bye, Pop!” Riley called out, and he raised his right hand in a wave, not looking back.

“We’re going for a stroll,” Grady said as he took Riley’s hand. She looked up at him with a smirk.

“A stroll? Really?”

“Thought it sounded nice,” he said, defending himself. “Old-fashioned.”

I patted his shoulder and leaned in closer. “Just keep your clothes on, that’s as old-fashioned as I need.”

Miss Olivia snorted, Riley clapped a hand to her eyes, and Grady turned five shades of red.

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Mom.”

I fixed her with a smile. “That’s me.”

“Let’s go,” she said, tugging on his hand.

“Riley,” I said, stopping her.

She turned around, exasperated. “What?”

I paused a second, staring hard into her eyes. “Don’t talk to strangers.”

Grady chuckled but Riley’s annoyance faltered, and she just nodded. I watched them walk away. She’s gonna be okay. She’s gonna be okay.

“She’s just walking around a festival, not Europe,” Miss Olivia said, leaning into my line of vision.

A laugh escaped my throat, but I didn’t really feel it. “Europe might be safer than Bethany.”

She squeezed my hand. “Take a breath, girl. Let’s go look at that jewelry over there.”

I followed her gaze to a kiosk filled with silver everything, appropriately bannered SILVER EVERYTHING, then back to the retreating figures getting swallowed by the crowd. I had the weirdest urge to run after her. Instead, I followed Miss Olivia as she made her way over to the bling.

There was an index card marked up in red Sharpie, ALL STERLING SLIVER 50% OFF! A sweating bald man with a goatee readied himself for a “sliver” sale as Miss Olivia perused the selection. As ringed and braceleted and adorned as she was, he probably figured an easy sale.

Not to be the case. Fifteen minutes later, Miss Olivia had him down to around 90 percent off a whole bucketload of jewelry. I tried on a few rings, a few bracelets, but put them all back. Riley had all the cash I could afford to blow, and I was saving my last five dollars for an Italian sausage po’boy sandwich I’d passed.

There was a pair of brushed silver fleur-de-lis hook earrings that kept drawing my eye, though. I picked them up and glanced at the tag. Twenty bucks. I grimaced. Even at half off, and giving up my sandwich, I didn’t have enough. And I wasn’t going to use Miss Olivia to get it cheaper. The poor guy was frustrated already. Still, I had to hold them up to my ears and check it out in the smudged mirror he had there.

“Those are nice,” said a familiar voice behind me.

I turned to see Jason half grinning down at me, and I chuckled as I put the earrings back, marveling at the heat to my face that had nothing to do with the temperature.

“Hey there.”

He frowned. “You’re not buying them?”

“No,” I said, waving a hand in their direction. “I was just messing around.”

He reached around me and picked them back up.

“Jason—”

“Hush.”

He held them up to my ears again for the mirror, standing behind me so close I felt the goose bumps tickle my skin. “Have you bought yourself anything since you’ve been back here?”

“Hmph,” Miss Olivia said loud enough for me to hear.

“Yep, bought some toothpaste day before yesterday.” I turned so that his raised eyebrow of disapproval was up close and personal.

“Cute.”

“Yeah, she’s irritating that way,” Miss Olivia said, shoving plastic bags of her purchases into her giant pink one.

I tried a loving glare, but she just smiled and leaned against the table.

“I’m good, Jason. I don’t need earrings.”

“Your earlobes might disagree.” He touched my earlobes as he said it and I thought for a minute they might ignite into flames.

“Well, they’ll just have to suck it up.”

He laughed and handed the earrings back to the guy, leaning into me as he did it. I got a delicious whiff of him that made my insides go a little wiggly. He hooked an arm around my neck and led me away, squeezing Miss Olivia’s hand as he did. She winked at me. Oh lord.

“Subtle,” I said softly.

“What?”

“You just slipped her money to buy them.”

He looked wounded. For about two seconds. “You make it really tough to do something nice for you.”

I laughed. “Sorry. Guess I’m not used to it.”

Jason pulled my head to him and kissed the top of it. It stopped me. Intimacy in public was something way outside my box. My feet stopped and I looked up into eyes that already had me figured out.

“Relax,” he said softly.

A thumb ran across my cheek, and I couldn’t look away. He understood me. And yet he knew nothing about me. He dropped a soft kiss on my lips followed by the sexiest grin I’d ever seen.

My stomach flipped over, and I tried not to want to do the girly scream as we walked on. There were children around, after all. But my giddiness was short-lived. Because right in front of me, sitting on the hood of an old car, was Alex.

I never expected him to be out there. Too much contact potential. I must have tensed or stopped or choked or something, because Jason’s head turned quickly.

“You okay?”

My mouth worked and I couldn’t quite form the words. Alex’s expression hit me to the core. Raw. Pain. The last time—the only other time—I’d seen that on him was when he was talking about Alyssa’s death. My head suddenly filled with that loud wind again, and I shook it away and pleaded with my eyes for him to understand.

“Dani?” Jason said, shaking my shoulder.

“I’m—sorry,” I managed, breaking eye contact with Alex. “I—”

“Well, wasn’t that sweet?”

It was a smart-ass drawl I knew in my sleep just by the level of skin crawl. Shelby and her equally obnoxious husband approached, her carrying a bag of jar candles, him carrying a beer.

“I had no idea y’all were a couple now,” Shelby said, smiling with all but her eyes. They darted back and forth between us, pissed off.

“I could say the same,” I said, glancing around them. Alex was gone. Damn it. “Never seen the two of you actually together.”

Matty ignored us and scanned the crowd, letting his eyes fall to the ass of a twentysomething walking by. Always after the strange.

“I thought you were fishing the tournament,” Jason said, pulling Matty’s attention back.

“Fish were crap the other day,” he said. “We decided it wasn’t worth the time.”

“The boys, either?”

Matty shrugged. “Not sure what Carson’s kids are doing, they probably bailed, too. Storm’s coming, anyway.”

Yes, it was. I rubbed my arms, suddenly itchy as uneasiness blanketed me.

Shelby caught a glimpse of someone better and excused herself. Matty turned to follow her, but not before giving me what I’m sure he thought was a sexy once-over. I pulled Jason away before Matty’s slow response time could even register I’d vacated the spot.

Dad and Jiminy walked up to our right, and I couldn’t miss the expression of curiosity on my dad’s face.

“Nathaniel Shane,” he said as they approached and I said nothing, reaching across me to shake Jason’s hand.

“Oh my God, I’m sorry. Dad, this is Jason, my—” I looked up at him, looking for a description. “Boss?”

Jason laughed and pumped his hand heartily, thank goodness. “Jason Miller, good to meet you, Mr. Shane.”

“You must be the new honcho at the bait shop that Marg has told me about.”

“Uh, I’m pretty sure Marg just humors me, sir. She lets me think I’m the boss, but we all really work for her.”

Jiminy chuckled. “Isn’t that the truth?”

Dad laughed, his eyes lighting up. “Where’s Riley?” he asked me. “She hanging out with her boss, too?”

“Cute.”

He winked at me and gave Jason an approving nod. The best he could do, I’m sure. Meeting up with my love life wasn’t something he’d had much experience with.

“She’s with Grady.”

I pulled my hair back and twisted it up with a hair band I had on my wrist. It was hot, yes, but it was more about stress. It felt like my blood was on a switch that someone kept flipping, changing the direction at will. I ran a hand over my face, wiping away the light sheen of sweat.

I was uneasy. Alex had seen me kiss Jason. That hurt my heart and I felt the urge to talk to him. And not just for that. For whatever else was going on. Whatever the hell else was behind the secrets and the walls and the noises and the feelings I kept getting and my feelings for him that kept igniting in weird ways and Sarah and my computer and my mother. There were just so many unanswered questions. And besides all that, I missed him. I missed my best friend.

And something was bugging the crap out of me with Riley. Something familiar. It was making me a nervous jumping bean that she wasn’t in my sights. And that wasn’t normal. Nothing was normal.

Jason and I walked along, but I didn’t register much. I kept looking for either of them, Riley or Grady. Something to ease the acidic dance my stomach was doing. Then I heard it. What my subconscious knew was coming, but I’d forgotten the signs. The feeling of everything being off.

The laughter. Not happy laughter or even an emotional release. But the bitter, evil, merciless sound of group hate. My eyes and skin burned in unison as I jolted toward the sound and left Jason behind. Not far.

I rounded the kiosk selling the sandwich I’d never see and nearly took down a small redheaded girl watching from outside a circle of people. She wasn’t laughing with the others. She was tearful. And she was dead.

The brief contact with me made us both gasp. Kind of like sticking a paper clip in a light socket, and I had to catch my breath. But I’d seen her confusion and regret in that instant, and I knew she’d asked Riley for help.

Don’t talk to strangers.

Seven or eight teenagers were gathered to pounce on my girl with the taunts and ugly ignorance I knew too well. She was alone; I didn’t see Grady anywhere. She was standing stiff and defiant, jutting that chin out and flashing her eyes, but it got quiet when Carson’s son Drew zeroed in.

“I’m sorry,” the redheaded girl said softly, backing away. I held a hand up.

“It’s okay.”

Five heads swiveled my way as I let my guard down by speaking to the girl they couldn’t see.

“What’s okay?”

I turned to Jason’s questioning gaze, then back to the group in front of me that for a moment forgot about Riley.

“That’s her mom,” whispered a pretty brunette to a girl I recognized as Micah, Shelby’s daughter. Micah nodded but was less interested in me than she was in the fact that her boyfriend was making a spectacle of hitting on Riley.

“Drew, come on,” she said, scooping a stray blonde lock behind her ear. Her eyes darted to a few of her friends and there was a crinkle above her nose. “Who cares what she did. Let’s go.”

He was clearly oblivious to her request, because as Riley attempted to walk around him, Drew stepped in her path, grabbing her around the waist and whispering something that included a tongue wag.

In that one action, I flashed backward twenty-five years. To Matty in the nurse’s office. Blaine behind the stairwell. Carson and his groupies at the party, and nightmare school days too numerous to count. Everything glazed over, coupled with the whispers echoing in my ears. I rushed forward to stop history from repeating itself. But Riley beat me to it.

She slapped his face so hard, even I jumped, stopping in mid-step. Wow. I never did that. Micah sucked in an audible breath at the sharp pop of hand against face.

“Get your fucking hands off me,” Riley said, her voice low and trembling.

Drew’s face twisted in shock and embarrassment, and he grabbed Riley’s arm and yanked her against him.

“What the hell’s going on here?”

I turned toward the voice I recognized as Carson’s, but the view of him became a blur as Grady morphed from behind me, newly purchased pork kabobs and boudain balls flying in his wake as he lunged at Drew. He had him pinned against the back of a giant wobbly plastic ice cream cone before anyone could react.

“Touch her again, and I’ll break your fucking hands,” he spat.

Drew’s face mirrored Riley’s for shock value. Shrieks and oh-my-Gods charged the air and pulled him back into action. Red-faced, he shoved back at Grady, moving him a foot or so with his bulk, but that just gave Grady leverage to slam Drew backward again.

“Drew!” Micah cried.

“Bring it, pretty boy,” Drew hissed. “I’ll mess up that face of yours. See if she wants to fuck you then.”

Grady grabbed him by his neck, but Drew slammed a hand up under Grady’s jaw. Jason was suddenly there, pulling them apart, and I realized I hadn’t moved.

“Come on, Grady. It’s not worth it,” Jason said through his teeth.

But Drew was hell-bent on making it worth it. As Jason pulled Grady backward, Drew blew a kiss to Riley.

“Yeah, I’ll show that cunt what a real man is.”

“Drew!” Micah yelled, this time in anger.

She looked like she wanted to pelt him herself. Grady broke free, however, and beat her to it, coming across Drew’s face with a hard right hook. Jason scrambled to restrain Grady as all hell broke loose. Girls screamed, Carson rushed in to extract his moronic son, and I yanked Riley by the arm and pulled her out of the way just as Drew spat blood in Grady’s face.

“Jesus, Carson, control your kid!”

It was out of my mouth before I could put any logical thought behind it. Carson had Drew around the chest, straining with the exertion, but he had enough energy to fix me with a sneer.

“Control yours, you bitch. She started this.”

“What?” Riley yelled.

I held on to her and she was trembling. I saw Grady’s eyes glaze over and Jason tighten his grip.

“She can’t help it, Carson.”

It was Matty’s voice. We all wheeled around as Matty and Shelby Sims strode up like king and queen of the prom. Shelby went straight to Micah’s side.

“Coach, he jumped me,” Drew slurred through his bloody mouth.

“It’s okay, son, he’s trash,” Matty said, smiling and patting Drew’s shoulder. “Just like what he hangs with.” He took a swig of his beer.

“Excuse me?” My voice didn’t sound like mine, but all eyes turned to me so apparently it was.

“Exactly,” Shelby chimed in. Micah looked at her with confusion and unmistakable embarrassment.

“Watch your mouth, Sims,” Jason said through his teeth to Matty. “This doesn’t involve you, but if you keep talking about Riley like that, it will.”

Matty laughed. “I’d say it doesn’t involve you, but I forgot you’re banging her mother.” He took another swallow of beer and I felt my ears go hot. “Like I said, the little whore can’t help it, it’s in the genes.”

Everything boiled and a lifetime of repressed rage bubbled to the surface. I was around Riley and smashing my hand across Matty’s face before I even realized it. I heard Riley gasp along with about twenty others, but no one had time for a second one because Jason shoved Grady aside and slammed a fist into Matty’s nose.

“Shit!” I yelped as blood spurted everywhere, jumping back and pulling Riley with me.

“Oh my God, Mom,” I heard her whimper, but I didn’t have the chance to look at her.

Matty’s bottle hit the ground and shattered, he swung back and missed, and Jason hit him again, bringing him down.

“You asshole!” screamed Shelby, running to her husband. “He’s unconscious! And you!” she continued, thrusting a finger at me. “This is all your fault. You and your psycho babbling to people that aren’t there. You’re a fucking lunatic and she is, too.”

“Mom, shut up,” Micah said, tears in her eyes and in her voice.

I felt like I was in the center of hell with Riley, and everyone around us had torches. Carson released his son in the chaos, who then shoved Grady from behind. Grady whirled around and it was about to be on again when a voice boomed across the ruckus.

“Enough!”

It was like God commanded the air, and everyone jumped. But I knew who possessed that voice. And that tone.