I push past the security standing at the main door to the house. They don’t say a fucking word; just give me a solid nod as I walk through. The music is so loud the beat reverberates through my body as I push through the crowds of people to get to his office.
Pushing down the handle I storm inside his office. His feet are resting on the desk and he jumps up as soon as he sees me.
“Finally. What the fuck took you so long?”
“That crazy bitch, Lynette,” I say with a roll of my eyes.
“We should’ve finished her when we had the chance,” he chimes in, holding out his arms to embrace me. I reciprocate warily, patting him heavily on the back. “Glad you came back, man.”
I’m still pissed at him about earlier, but anything to do with Isabelle and he’s got me. And I’m sure he’s all too aware of that.
“So, what’s the news?” I pull away from him, digging into my pocket for a cigarette. I grab the lighter sitting on Carter’s desk, light up and throw it back down.
“You’re gonna want to fucking sit down for this,” he says, with a big fat fucking smirk on his face. I draw my eyebrows together, my eyes focused on him.
I tighten my jaw, clenching my teeth together, my eyes glaring at him as I await some fucking answers. “Spit it out for fuck’s sake.”
“So, I called to put a little pressure on that useless investigator of yours, only to find out he has some very interesting information on Isabelle.”
My adrenaline spikes, causing a wave of dizziness to wash over me. I blink rapidly, trying to clear the growing haze across my eyes. “What about her?” I choke out.
“They found her dad dead a few days ago. An anonymous call was made to the police and his body was recovered out in the middle of Brierly woods. He was found in a small wooden cabin, and by all accounts, she was there with him…”
“So, where the fuck is she?” I cut in. “Why hasn’t she come home?” I take a huge drag of the cigarette, pushing my free hand deep inside my pocket as I start to pace back and forth the office.
“They found evidence to state she was there with him, but when the police got to the cabin, there was no sign of the girl. In fact, they think it was her who made the call.”
“So, we should be able to find her now, right?” I ask, clinging onto any sign of hope I can muster.
“You can’t find someone who doesn’t want to be found, Brax.”
“But I need to know,” I snap. “I need to find out if there is a reason she hasn’t returned. There must be a reason, Brax. I didn’t fucking imagine all the shit that happened when we were kids. Bonds like ours can’t just be forgotten… or broken, it just doesn’t fucking work like that.”
“Tomorrow,” he points directly at me. “Tomorrow we get that fucking investigator here,” he jabs his index finger down against his desk. “We will get some answers and a location on her, if it’s the last motherfucking thing we do.”
I hold out my hand and he takes it, pulling me in for a man hug. “Thanks for everything, man.”
He pulls back, resting his hands on my shoulders. “You are like a brother to me. I hate it when we fight and you should know I will always help in any way I can. I saved you, and we’re in this together. ‘Til the end,” he pushes on my shoulders, causing me to waver slightly.
“Always, man.”
“The party is still going if you care to join us?”
“Nah… I’m good. Not feeling the whole party thing. My head is a fucking wreck.”
“You sure?” he asks, bending his head until it’s in my line of sight. “I know Tara was asking for you. I think she’d be happy to keep you company for the night,” he prompts and I know his intentions are good, but the train wreck inside my head tells me this is not a good idea. But I need to tread carefully. This girl is Carter’s cousin, and the last thing I want is to piss him off. He’s ruthless, unpredictable and fears nobody.
“Maybe some other time,” I reply casually. “I really just want to crash back at my place.”
“Sweet,” he sucks in a deep breath. “Call me tomorrow. We will get this meeting set up.”
“Sure,” I say walking out and straight into the small frame of Jessica.
“Hey,” she says sweetly, her voice just audible over the sound of the music. “You disappeared on us earlier.”
“I just needed to get out. Get some fucking fresh air.”
She closes the gap between us, grabbing the collar of my shirt and lifting onto her tiptoes. “Let me make it all better, Brax. Why don’t we go and find a room?”
I reach for her hands pulling them from my shirt and stepping back. “Now’s not a good time,” I refuse vehemently.
“But Brax…” she drawls on my name as it lingers on her tongue, the whine of her voice like the sound of nails scraping down a chalk board.
I furrow my brow in annoyance. “I said now is not a good time.” I swing out my arm, pushing her away from me. I watch as she stumbles backwards, her head connecting with the wall.
“Fuck, Brax…” she yells, rubbing the back of her head where it made contact with the wall. “You don’t have to be a dick. I’m more than just some bimbo you fuck when you’re bored…”
I stop her mid-sentence, my hand loosely wrapped around her neck as I force her up against the wall. She clutches at my hand while my nostrils flare and my dark eyes narrow on her. “Watch who you are talking to, bitch.”
“I’m sorry,” she chokes out. “I stepped out of line.”
“Too fucking right, you did,” I scold her. “And here’s the thing, Jessica. I fuck who I want, when I want, and your description was fucking on point. You are just some bimbo I fuck when I’m bored. Nothing more, nothing less. Get over yourself.”
“You should really be nicer to me, Brax.” She pins me with her stare as I contemplate her words. Thrusting my hand forward, I grip her neck tightly, forcing her back against the wall.
“Why?” I growl, “Why would you say that? What are you hiding?”
“Nothing,” she squirms, her hands covering mine as she tries to get me to loosen the grip. “Just, you know, one day you might need me more than you realize.”
I scoff loudly, my face contorted. “You’re fucking crazy if you believe that.”
“Let go of me,” she chokes out, but I can’t help but tighten the hold around her neck further. I glare at her as her face drains of all its color.
“Don’t take it too far, man,” I hear a random voice to the right of me. His hand lands heavily on my shoulder but I shrug it off, snapping my head in his direction. I rake my eyes over the fucker that dared to put his hand on me. It’s one of the guys from the motorcycle club. The tattoos, leather and biker boots kind of give him away.
“Step the fuck away. I don’t want to cause trouble with you guys, but this bitch has pushed me one step too far,” I growl, my eyes glaring at him as he casually stands beside me, his hands in the pocket of his pants.
“I ain’t going anywhere until you let her go.” He says, his voice calm and his shoulders lift and fall slowly as his eyes never break my stare.
“What’s wrong? You worried I’m gonna damage your little fuck buddy? Uh?” I yell and suddenly realize we are surrounded by a swarm of people all watching this unfold. I stare at him, knowing what a fucking waste of space this motherfucker is. They all are. They go around in their fucking gangs, talking shit about duty to their club, how they think they are all one big happy family. Only their morals are more corrupt than they are. Drugs, violence, club whores. These fuckers don’t care about anyone. So why? Why is he standing beside me, so concerned about something that has nothing to do with him? I relax my grip around her throat, but keep it tight enough that she remains pinned against the wall.
“I’ve never fucked this girl, but you need to back off, man.”
“Or what?” I say dropping my head, glaring at him with hatred.
“Brax, enough,” Carter’s voice roars and I can’t help but shake my head slowly from side to side.
“You gonna let this piece of shit talk to me like that? Uh?” I roar, the heat rising inside of me as my rage reaches boiling point. He sure as shit needs to have my back. We cannot let these motherfuckers into our territory making demands.
“I’ll deal with this,” Carter says with a nod, pulling the biker whose name I don’t know out of the way. “Go find some other pussy to fuck. This one is off limits, and this is our business, not yours,” Carter snarls. The guy drops his head, his eyes flit between us as he slowly steps away.
“What the fuck is going on?” Carter mumbles, his head appearing right beside mine. “Let go of her. What the fuck has got into you? This is a party.”
“I’m tired of this bitch’s bullshit. I want her out of here.” I instruct, finally dropping my hand, rubbing my wrist as it aches like a motherfucker.
“You want her out man, she’s out.” He replies, his hand resting on my shoulder blades. “Let me deal with her. We catch up tomorrow, yeah?” he says with a nod and I reciprocate.
I turn on my heel, racing until I’m out of the door. I inhale sharply the minute I step outside, pacing back and forth as I dig in my pocket, pulling out and lighting a cigarette. I charge toward the side of the house, dropping down on the brick wall. I rest my hand on my bended knee, my head dropping forward as I take a huge drag of my cigarette. My vision distorts, the music muffled in the background. Something catches my attention. The sound of muffled screams causes the hair on the back of my neck to stand on end. I jump off the wall, using my boot to stub out my cigarette. My head whips from side to side and for a second I feel like I’m going fucking crazy. All I can hear is my heart pounding out of my chest with every second that passes.
And then suddenly it’s as if the pounding stops, as if my heart has paused for a moment. My eyes land on the source of the noise as I focus on them at the side of the house, a small amount of light coming from the window highlights them. I swallow down hard, not wanting to draw attention to the fact that I’m watching. Watching as this guy tries to rape her. One hand is forced against her mouth, his other is between her legs as she frantically tries to kick him off. I inch closer, the bodies becoming recognizable. I can no longer hold back. The rage takes over and I race toward them, fisting the back of his jacket as I pull him off her.
“What the…” his words trail off as I lean over him, pressing the gun against his forehead.
“You sorry ass motherfucker,” I drawl out, as I press the gun further against his head. His hands rest back against the ground in surrender. “You have no idea who you’re fucking messing with!”
“She wanted it, man. She was begging for it. She wanted this as much as I did.” His words fall out in a nervous tumble. I look at her, hoping she would confirm his story to stop me losing my shit.
“That right?” I ask her with a lift of my brow. “Was this consensual?” I narrow my eyes on her, a small trickle of blood slowly runs from her nose, her hands reaching for the strap of her top as she tries to conceal her bruised body.
My eyes linger on her as I wait for her reply. “Well?” I yell a little louder than I intended. The light from the window above highlights the solitary tear that rolls down her cheek. Her whole body shakes and I know now I don’t need to hear the words. I know exactly what this sick fucker was doing to Tara.
Tara fucking Mellano.
Carter’s cousin.
The look on her face alone causes the adrenaline that has been coursing through my veins to soar high, I can’t fucking see straight. I blink repeatedly, trying to clear the haze from my eyes.
“I didn’t… honestly, man.” His breathing is rapid, his head lifting from the ground as his eyes are fixed on me. There’s no mistaking the desperate look in his eyes. It’s the look of fear. I’ve seen it a million times before.
“You had some serious fucking balls coming in here, attempting to rape the boss’ cousin.”
“What?” he gasps, his head dropping back against the ground. He clamps his eyes shut and I still the gun, squeezing the trigger just a little. I glance over at Tara who is leaning against the wall. Confusion clouds my mind. I know I have to end this fucker but it might mean going to war with the whole of The Savages motorcycle gang. It’s the last thing we need. We have to have these guys on our side.
I swallow down hard, the decision like a heavy weight on my chest.
“You don’t want to do this,” the guy on the floor talks, his voice wavering. “You kill a Savage member and those guys will go to war over it. We are family.”
“Shut up. Shut the fuck up!”
His words were adding confusion to my already fucked up thought process.
“You can have her, man. No one needs to know about this…”
“I told you to shut the fuck up,” I yell at him, my teeth clenched together so tightly that the words come out with a hiss. “We could share her,” he says with a sinister smile.
“Fuck you!” I yell, my lungs burning from the anger I feel rising. Sweat pools across my brow, my breathing all over the place. “Fuck!” I swiftly jerk my hand pulling the fucking trigger.
Tara falls to the ground at the sound of the gun going off. Blood sprays my face and I stand, wiping it on my sleeve as the fucker twitches on the floor and I watch the life being sucked from him. The second he stops moving, I reach over to Tara, offering her my hand. She shakes her head, a look of terror etched across her face.
“I won’t hurt you, I promise.” I lower my voice, dropping onto my knees beside her. Her eyes glance over to the body on the floor and she instantly squeezes them shut.
“I feel sick,” she gags, covering her mouth with her hand as she drops her head to the side. She heaves and I feel helpless.
“Wait here,” I say, pushing myself back up to my feet.
“No,” she screeches, “Please don’t leave me here… with the body.”
“We have to tell Carter,” I reply. “He needs to know what happened. But the rest of the Savages need to be kept out of this. Understand?”
“You can’t go in there. You’re covered in blood.” She nods, her eyes focusing on my chest. “It’ll be a dead giveaway. Everyone will know it was you. It’s all a mess… it’s such a mess.” She sits up, wrapping her arms around her knees, rocking back and forth. “This is my fault. Carter is going to say I brought this on myself…”
“No fucking way,” I growl. “That piece of shit did this, not you.”
“But, tonight, with you, I acted like someone I’m not, all because I wanted you to notice me. I’ve given everyone the impression I’m easy.”
“Stop,” I yell, “This isn’t your fault and that’s the end of it. We have to work out what we are going to do about the mess we created.” I pull out my cell phone, scrolling through my list of contacts. I dial Carter’s number, hoping he has his phone with him.
The ring tone dials out.
“Fuck, Carter, answer,” I murmur down the phone.
“Brax,” his voice booms through the receiver.
“Carter, I need you to act normal and come out of the side door, near the trash cans. We have a problem, but whatever you do, do not draw attention to yourself.”
The line goes dead and I blink rapidly as I stare at the blank screen.
“No,” Tara’s voice breaks. “He can’t see me like this.” She tries to stand to her feet, only her legs buckle beneath her and she drops back down on her knees.
“I’m sorry, Tara. He has to see what happened here. He needs to understand.”
I’m on high alert at the sound of footsteps approaching. My eyes are glued to where the sound is come from, and I exhale heavily when Carter’s face appears from around the side of the house.
“What the fuck?” He stands with his arms crossed. “Who is that?” He asks, his foot pushing against the thigh of the body laid on the ground.
“One of the fucking Savages…”
“Fuck, he’s barely recognizable,” he murmurs, scraping his hands down his face. “Fuck, fuck, fuck. I need the MC on our side, Brax.”
“I know… but fuck, look at the state of her.” I sigh, heavily, thrusting my hand toward her shivering body.
“Tara. Fuck, honey, are you okay?” He shakes his head as he moves over, kneeling beside her. “Stupid fucking question, right?”
“Listen, Carter. We gotta move. And fast. Get someone to get rid of the body. Get housecleaning to clean up the mess and we act like we have no idea where the bastard disappeared. Get the door staff to confirm they saw him leave, and I’ll take Tara with me. She can get herself cleaned up at my place.”
Carter nods slowly, standing up and embracing me. “You saved her. For that, I’m grateful. I would have done the same fucking thing to the sick piece of shit. Go,” he separates from me, “Take her back to your place, make sure she’s okay. I’ll get this taken care of.”
“Thanks, man,” I say, my eyes landing on the petrified face of Tara who is still sitting on the floor, clutching her legs. She glances up at me, and my heart starts pounding erratically against my ribcage. She has the look of fear in her young, innocent eyes, and I can’t tear my eyes away from her.
“I got you,” I say with almost a smile. She reaches out her trembling hand and I take it, pulling her to her feet. She falls against my chest, her weak legs barely able to stand. I wrap my bloodied arms around her, making sure she doesn’t fall.
“I’m sorry,” she sobs. “I just feel so weak.”
“Here,” I say, taking her arm. “Hold it around my waist and let me help you over to my bike.”
“Thank you,” she mouths, flashing me a pained smile.
“Call me when it’s done,” I shout back over my shoulder to Carter. He gives me a nod of agreement as we make our way out from the side of the house and across the driveway. I scan the whole area, happy that there is no one in sight. I make it to where my bike is parked, helping Tara onto the back.
“Hold on tight, okay?” I say, hooking my finger and lifting her chin. She allows her eyes to flutter shut, giving me an unspoken acknowledgment. My heart thuds in my chest as I look at this poor girl’s bloodstained face, the anger like a dull ache in the pit of my stomach.
That motherfucker got what he deserved.
Seeing the agonizing look on her face tells me I did the right thing.
No matter what the consequences are.
I drop my hand, mounting the bike, and reaching behind me to locate her hands, I take them, wrapping them around my waist. “Hold on as tight as you can.”
“I’ll try,” she chokes out, resting her head against my rigid back, her hands gripping the front of my shirt.
I have a feeling this will be the longest ride home, ever.
* * *
Parking my bike on the driveway, I cut the engine and kick out the stand. I dismount and hold out my hand to a disheveled Tara. She wipes her running nose on the back of her hand, her eyes swollen from the silent tears that have fallen over her cheeks. She holds out her hand, her whole body shaking and her lip quivers uncontrollably. My fucking heart aches for her as I help her off the bike, only for her legs to buckle beneath her and she almost crashes to the ground. I quickly wrap my arm around her tiny waist, pulling her into my arms.
“Not doing so well, are you, T?”
“Well, aren’t you the king of understatements,” she jokes, sniffling, as she tries to let out some sort of laughter. “I just… I just have no strength left.” She stutters through her uncontrollable shaking. “I fought so hard, but my body feels so weak,” she continues, placing her head against my chest as I walk toward the door.
“Shit,” I grumble, realizing my key is in my pocket. I lower her down, sitting her on the step while I get the door open. She hugs her knees, her chin resting there. I bend beside her, pushing my hand under her bent knees.
“No, it’s okay,” she rushes out, “I’ll try to walk.” She gives me a sad smile, but I’m not listening. I pull her up and into me, storming inside and kicking the door shut behind me.
“I said…”
“I don’t give a fuck.” I cut her off. “You need help, I’m gonna fuckin help. No arguments,” I warn.
She doesn’t protest. She relaxes into me, placing her head just at the crook of my neck. For some reason, I feel partly responsible. She just saw me blow some motherfuckers brains out. That’s some serious shit for a young girl to handle. I take the stairs up to the first floor and make my way into my room. It’s the only room I have a bed in.
I drop her down in my armchair beside the bed.
“I’ll run you a bath. You need to get cleaned up.”
“But I have no clothes,” she mutters.
“I’ll find you something,” I mumble, making my way into the adjoining bathroom.
“Thank you,” she shouts after me. I stop, turning and holding onto the door frame.
“Don’t thank me,” I scorn, annoyance lacing my tone. “I’m the guy that got you covered in blood.”
“But you stopped him from raping me. You saved me, Braxton.”
“Don’t,” I warn, the sting of her words almost too much. How can she think good of a man who just took another’s life? “I’m not a good person and I never will be. I did what I did because you are Carter’s cousin. Not because I care about you. Don’t put me in that fucking category.”
The sudden sad expression on her face makes me feel a pang of guilt. The sorrow in her beautiful brown eyes is like a kick to the stomach. She drops her head, cupping it with her hands. I turn, making my way into the bathroom.
Good going, fucking jerk.
I turn the hot tap, running the water at full speed. Steam billows, quickly filling the room.
Returning to the bedroom, I make my way over to the closet. I look through for something small enough for this petite young girl. I pull out a jersey and a small pair of shorts. “For you,” I say, throwing them on the bed, landing just beside her. I watch, waiting for her reply.
But nothing.
Nada.
Before I can say anything, I’m interrupted by the sound of my cell phone ringing, Carter’s name lighting up my screen.
“Carter,” I say as I answer. “All taken care of?”
“Done,” he replies. “How is she?”
“Fuck knows, man. I can’t read women for shit,” I grumble a little laughter down the handset before handing it to Tara. “It’s Carter. He’s checking in on you,” I say pushing it into her hand and returning to the closet.
“I’m not sure,” she mumbles as I listen in to the conversation. “I mean, I’m not sure Carter. It was all a blur; my adrenaline was off the chart. I was too busy trying to fight him off…” she snivels. “I know, I know,” she continues. “Yeah, bye,” she holds the phone out to me and I take it, placing it against my ear.
“I will have some things dropped off for Tara. I want you to keep an eye on her. I think we got rid of him without anyone suspecting anything, but I have a feeling this will come back to bite us in the fucking ass,” he says, letting out a heavy sigh. “Questions will be asked when they realize he’s missing. I want you to keep her there with you…”
“For as long as you need, man. You know she’ll be safe here with me.”
“That’s the only place I know she is safe,” he mumbles. “Listen, I gotta go. We need to meet tomorrow with the detective. I’ll call him and arrange a time. I’ll be in touch.”
I end the call, pushing it onto the table beside the bed.
“The bath should be ready. Can you make it into the bathroom?”
She pushes herself up, her legs shaky at first, but she steadies herself by holding onto the arm of the chair. “I’m good,” she says with a smile, shuffling one foot forward, but I notice her legs buckle and I race over, putting my arm around her waist to steady her.
“Walk with me, for fuck sakes,” I mutter out of frustration.
“I’ll be okay after a rest. It’s the shock, it must just be the shock,” she repeats and I sense the panic in her tone.
“Of course.” I say with an assertive nod. Leading her over to the bathtub, I rest her ass down on the side, shutting off the faucet.
“Thank you,” she mouths to me. “Can I ask you something?”
“Ask away, darling. Can’t promise I’ll answer.”
“Do you think this was my fault? Part of me feels like I brought this on myself.”
“No, I already told you to stop fucking talking that way,” I respond with a growl.
“Look at me,” she sniffles, tears starting to fall from her already swollen eyes. “Look how I’m dressed. I asked for this. I made this happen.” Her sniffles turn into an uncontrollable sob. I kneel in front of her, resting my hands against her badly grazed knees.
“Why the fuck would you say that? That guy was a sick fuck and had it coming to him. He steps on our turf, forcing his dick on the boss’ cousin… well that’s a sure-fire way to get yourself killed around here,” I say with a lift of my brow. She leans forward, her arms around my neck, resting her head on my shoulder.
“I don’t know how to thank you for what you’ve done for me.”
“Don’t thank me. Just doing my job.”
I push her back, feeling uncomfortable at having her arms around me. “You should get in before it’s too fucking cold.” I jump onto my feet, turning to make my way out.
“No! Stay,” she blurts out, swiping her hand across her face clearing the stray tears away. “I need you to know that what happened back there, well, that’s not me.”
“What are you talking about?” I question her, unsure of what exactly she is referring to.
“You know. That whole thing between you and me…” she points between us. “And Jess.”
“Oh,” I say with a lift of my head, narrowing my eyes on her.
“I was high and wanted to get your attention. She told me this was the right way. She said this would make you want me… because I wasn’t sure you’d be interested in someone like me.”
“Someone like you?”
“Yeah. Carter’s cousin. Young. Inexperienced.”
“Stay away from Jess. She’s trouble, and she’s been kicked out, told never to return.”
“I think she was trying to help me...” the words fall out of the naïve girl’s mouth. There is only one person Jess cares about and that’s herself.
“You are young and fucking beautiful. Why the fuck would you be interested in me?” I ask, my thoughts flashing back to the biker laid on the floor, blood splayed everywhere. This is more than just a job for me. I get some sick satisfaction from taking these fuckers lives. I’m sparing the world from the motherfuckers who deserve nothing but death.
Death follows me.
“You’re Carter’s cousin…”
“It’s not a problem for Carter…” she replies, clutching her hands in front of her and looking up at me through her long, dark lashes.
I can’t deny that this girl gets my dick stiff. “This isn’t about you…”
“You can talk to me, Brax. Even if it’s just as friends.”
“Nothing to talk about,” I snap.
“We all have a story, Brax,” she says, clutching at the hem of her top as she tries to lift it over her head. The grimace on her face lets me know she’s in pain.
“Need a hand?”
“Please,” she exhales heavily; letting out the huge breath she’s been holding as she fights back the pain. I can tell she’s nervous. Her lips shake and her eyes are fixed on me.
I pull up her top, revealing her bruised upper body. She stands up, resting her palm against the wall as she steadies herself. I reach around and unfasten her bra as she clutches to the front, holding it in place. I slowly pull down her skirt, revealing her naked body. A small gasp escapes her.
“I think I’m good now,” her words fall out with a stutter.
“Drop the bra,” I demand and her eyes widen with shock. “I’m making sure you get in the bathtub,” I clarify. “Don’t want you slipping or hurting yourself. Carter would have my head on a stake.”
She laughs nervously, her eyes focusing on the floor. I grab her chin, lifting it until our eyes meet. “What’s wrong, Tara?”
“I, uh, I don’t know. I just feel a little exposed I guess.”
“Wait. The girl who sucked my cock is suddenly shy?”
“Like I said, I was high. But here, with you, in the cold light of day, well it’s kind of nerve-wracking.”
I drop my hand, shaking my head before scooping her into my arms and lowering her into the bath of water. She hisses as I lower her down, my eyes searching hers.
“Sorry…”
“Don’t fucking apologize.” I step back, shaking off the water on my arms. I reach to the back of my neck, grabbing my shirt, pulling it over my head and throwing it on the floor. I reach down to the button on my jeans and pop it open. I slowly glance up at Tara whose eyes are fixed on me and her mouth forms an ‘O’ shape. A small grin tugs at the corner of my mouth. I push down my jeans and kick them on the floor. Her eyes draw down to my erection straining against my boxers. “I’ll be in there,” I say with a jab of my thumb. “Shout me if you need help.”
She swallows down hard, nodding lightly.
I make my way out, dropping back on the bed, a range of emotions flowing through me. Tara is fucking beautiful and I can’t deny how much I want her. But every time I feel something for a girl, I can’t help the guilt that rages through me like a motherfucking tornado. Why do I feel something for a girl I haven’t seen in over six years? I always thought she’d be my first and only one, and every girl I fuck just isn’t Isabelle. But here and now, I can’t deny how much I like Tara, and that fills me with the worst kind of dread possible.
I close my eyes and drift off into a world of wonderful memories.
“Do you think we’ll always be together, Brax?” Her beautiful voice matches her beautiful eyes.
“How can you even ask me that?” I tut loudly. “Of course.” I reach out, taking her hand in mine, intertwining my fingers with hers. “See, even our hands fit together perfectly,” I say, then smile. I stare into her baby-blue eyes, the window to her soul. I step forward a little, causing her to stumble back until her body rests against the oak tree.
“Isabelle,” I address her, clearing my throat as I feel it tighten. “I need to tell you something,” I say, nerves lacing my tone.
“What?” she quietly gasps. “What is it, Brax?”
I’m nervous and it’s beginning to show. The last thing I want is to alarm her. “I don’t want to be friends anymore,” I say, squeezing her hand tighter in mine.
“What?” She glares at me, her eyebrows drawn down together.
“I want you so much more than a friend,” I add, and watch as she bites the corner of her lip. She pulls my hand toward her chest, resting it on those tits I’ve had my eye on for years.
“We are destined to be together,” she murmurs. “Feel it. Feel how hard my heart beats when we are together, Brax.”
I lean into her, wrapping my arms around her waist. “I’d really like to kiss you now,” I forewarn her.
“I’ve been waiting for you to kiss me for months,” she says with a twinkle in her eye. I bend my head, hovering my lips over hers. I’m frozen from both excitement and a little fear. I feel her warm breath shaking against my lips.
“What are you waiting for, Brax?” she teases, her voice wavering.
“I want it to be perfect,” I reply honestly. The truth is I’ve waited so long for this moment to come that I’m scared I will mess it up. That I won’t kiss her the way someone in love kisses.
“We are Brax and Isabelle. We are meant to be and I have no doubt that it will be perfect. I know it will be perfect. More than perfect.”
I allow my eyes to flutter shut. I let my actions do the talking as I press my lips against hers. As soon as we make that connection, I can no longer hold back. I clutch her head in my shaky hands. Everything about this is sensory overload. Her smell, the taste of her lips against mine seduces me, and I can no longer think straight. I move my lips against hers, hoping that I’m doing this kissing thing right.
“Brax,” she whispers slowly, prolonging each letter as if to savor them. I smile, my heart fluttering at her voice as I hold onto this girl who owns my heart. Never before has my name ever felt so wonderful a one, I think, as I lean in for another kiss…
“I knew it,” his voice calls over, laced with annoyance. “I knew I would end up the odd one out.” I part from Isabelle, the sinking feeling in my stomach ties like a damn knot. I rest the palm of my hand against the tree trunk, one hand either side of her head, while slowly turning to look at him.
Travis.
Our goofy friend.
The one I’ve been giving the slip all day so I could get some time alone with Isabelle.
The moment I see the look on his face is the moment I can no longer feel anything but the need to smile.
“So, this…” he points a wavering finger directly at me, “this is the reason you were acting all weird earlier. And, ugh, you two are so gross.”
I chuckle to myself, watching as he pushes his glasses up his nose.
“No,” Isabelle, blurts out. “I don’t ever want you to feel left out,” she says with a slight pout, ducking under my arms and jogging over to Travis. “I love you, Trav,” she says, wrapping her arms around his neck and knocking him off-balance. They both fall to the ground and laughter fills the wide-open space that surrounds us. They roll on the ground, before Isabelle falls onto her back, holding her stomach as she looks at Trav. “It’s us three until the end of time.” She grabs his hand, pulling it toward her. Isabelle studies the sad look on his face. His mouth is downturned and his eyes fill with the dew of tears as though he’s on the verge of crying.
“I love you too,” he mumbles, his eyes flit between me and Izzy. “But I get it,” he says, throwing his hands in the air before turning his head to the side until they are face to face. “You just love him more.”
“No,” she gasps, pushing herself up, resting her whole weight on one hand. “It’s not like that,” she replies, her eyes looking at me, full of dread. “It’s a different kind of love. Not more, not less, just different.” She starts to prod his side, causing him to jerk up. I walk over to them, putting my arm around Travis’ neck and pulling him downward until I have him in a neck lock. I rub my knuckles over his hair as he yells and tries to get me to let go.
“Stop,” Izzy slaps my arm playfully. “Let him go,” she demands with a lift of her brow.
I smile, lessening my grip on him.
“We have to make a pact,” she says, gesturing for us to move closer. Placing her one arm around my waist and the other around Travis’, we stand in a circle, heads together. “No matter what happens, we are here for each other.” She glances between us and we both nod in agreement.
“Always,” I say, fixing my gaze on Travis.
“I don’t want to get in your way…” but he’s cut off by Izzy’s finger pressed against his lips.
“Shhhh,” she says with a lift of her brow. “We are a three piece, and that’s how it will stay.”
I put my hand into the middle of the circle we’ve created, and Travis takes it, along with Izzy’s hand covering us. “The three amigos,” I say with a chuckle before we raise our hands together and cheer.
“The three amigos,” Isabelle cheers.
The sudden sound of a voice calling me pulls me from my semi-consciousness. I jump up, my heart pounding and my body feeling heavy. Every time I dream of them it takes me back to the moment and the pain I felt when I lost them both.
Both friends in one day.
The two parts of me that made my heart complete were ripped away.
Only I cling onto the hope that I will get her back. I have to believe she is still out there and I can be the one to save her. Nothing and nobody can simply disappear the way she did. I will never believe she just left me. I rub my thumb across my lips at the memory of our first kiss. When I dream of her, I feel transported to a place where I was once happy.
“Brax,” I hear her call me again and I jump to my feet making my way over to the bathroom.
“I hate to ask, but can you help me out? I tried, I really did, but I just haven’t got the strength back in my legs yet.” She says, despair in her eyes.
I smile the smallest of smiles before charging over to the tub and wrapping my arms around her waist. I lift her up, throwing her over my shoulder. I turn, grabbing a towel from the rack, covering her ass as I make our way into the bedroom. Dropping her flat on her back, she scrambles to cover herself with the towel wedged beneath her.
I can’t help the grin that spreads as my eyes rake over her naked body.
“Asshole,” she jokes, pulling out the towel and covering her body.
“No need to be shy. We’re all friends here,” I say smugly, giving her a wink before handing her the clothes I got out for her earlier.
“I’m going to shower now. You should rest. Your body needs to heal.” I can’t stop my eyes from focusing on the bruising around her neck, the anger rising in me as I do. Heat rushes to my head and I have to stop.
Stop looking at the beautiful girl on the bed.
* * *
I shower, scrubbing the traces of blood from my skin. The water was way too cool, but I needed to cool my skin. The asshole in me wants to fuck that beauty laid out on my bed, whereas the fucked up part of my brain that can’t let go takes over.
It’s a constant battle with my inner turmoil. My body chasing what it desires while my mind is stuck in the past. With the one girl who could make me complete. The one girl who could pull my soul from the depths of darkness, and force it back into the light where it once was.
I skim the towel over my skin, before securing it around my waist. Slowly exiting the bathroom, I peer into the dark bedroom. I look over at Tara, her body still and her eyes closed, the towel still covering her tiny bruised body. I walk around the bed, grabbing my phone from the nightstand before turning to make my way out. I startle at the feeling of the towel being ripped from my body, blinking rapidly as I try to work out what has happened. My eyes catch sight of Tara clutching the towel in her hands and a puff of laughter escapes me.
“Touché,” I smile widely, walking over and snatching the towel from her hands.
“You don’t have to leave,” she mumbles, pushing herself across the bed a little. “Plenty of space for two,” she says coyly, tapping the bed in front of her.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” I dismiss, wrapping the towel around my waist and taking the few steps over to the door.
“Stop,” her voice croaks as her voice gives out. “I don’t want to be alone.”
“You won’t be,” I reply. “I’ll be downstairs. On the couch.”
“No, I mean, I don’t want to be in here alone.”
What the fuck can I say to that? I said I’d look after her, not become her damn boyfriend, despite how fucking good it would be to spoon this tasty piece of ass. I stand near the door for what feels like the longest time, chewing the corner of my mouth, torn on what I should do.
“Please,” she pleads, and it’s almost too much.
“I sleep naked. No fucking complaints.” I charge over to the bed and slip in beside her.
“Me too,” she replies sweetly, throwing off the towel and sliding under the covers.
I lift my arm up, pushing my hands under my head. I can feel her hard stare on me, and I drop my head toward her. “Sleep,” I warn her, hoping to slip out as soon as she drops off.
“Yes, boss,” she replies with a giggle. “Are you always this bossy?”
“You ain’t seen nothing yet, babe.”