Chapter Nine
The girls made leaving excuses to Cougar Kate soon after their “readings”.
‘Good news?’ enquired their hostess, trying and failing to look concerned about their downcast faces.
‘Yesh,’ slurred Amber. Her expression was one of belligerence. ‘Absholutely the besht newsh,’ she took a deep breath and put all her effort into adding, ‘everrr.’
‘It’s been, um, an interesting evening,’ said Chrissie.
‘You can say that again,’ mumbled Dee.
‘Excellent,’ said Cougar Kate with delight. ‘See you all at the office on Monday. Hopefully I’ll shortly have good news too, and we can celebrate over an instant coffee in our employer’s manky kitchenette.’ She gave a gurgle of laughter at her stab of wit.
The three friends drooped out of Cougar Kate’s house to Dee’s car.
‘Right,’ said Dee, starting up the engine. ‘Who’s going first in sharing the “wonderful” news delivered by Madam chuffing Know-It-All?’
‘I feel shick,’ said Amber.
‘Don’t you dare throw up in my car,’ warned Dee. She reversed off Cougar Kate’s driveway and headed in the direction of Amber’s house. The sooner she got there, the better. The last thing she wanted was Amber regurgitating champagne and gin all over the back seat.
‘You don’ unnershtand,’ Amber mumbled. ‘I feel shick at what that ’orrible woman tol’ me.’
‘Go on then,’ said Chrissie, ‘you go first, Amber. Tell us what Madam Rosa said to you.’
‘She shed my hearth was,’ Amber waved her hands extensively, ‘ever’where, an’ Math-yoo wash bein’ a ver’ naughty boy.’
‘Eh?’ asked Dee.
Chrissie translated. ‘I think Amber said her heart is everywhere and Matthew is being a very naughty boy.’
‘How naughty?’ demanded Dee.
‘Havin’ an affair.’
‘Huh,’ said Dee. ‘Right, Chrissie. Your turn.’
‘Madam Rosa said pretty much the same thing to me.’
‘I knew it,’ Dee crowed. ‘The woman is a fraud. For sure. She told me Josh is having an affair.’
‘Why would she tell us such things?’ cried Chrissie, distress apparent.
‘Don’t you see?’ said Dee, swerving around a fox that was dithering, about dashing in front of the car.
‘Don’ do that,’ Amber warned, ‘or I’ll be shick.’
‘Sorry,’ said Dee. ‘Listen to me. We’ve sussed Madam Rosa’s marketing ploy. That’s as obvious as the noses on our faces. Madam Rosa is telling us something so shocking we’ll ring her up and make a forty-five-minute appointment and spend a fortune in the process. Then she’ll probably tell us not to worry, our men have seen the error of their ways, all is well in Romance Land, and we’ll be married by Christmas. You mark my words. The woman is a swindler. A money-making charlatan.’ Dee clutched the steering wheel in anger. To hell with Madam Rosa. She hoped the wretched woman’s head rotated one-hundred-and-eighty degrees at midnight and she had to rush off to the local church to get exorcised.
‘The only thing ish,’ said Amber unhappily, ‘she tol’ me some other shtuff. And that was accurate.’
‘Oh?’ Chrissie raised her eyebrows enquiringly, and looked over her shoulder at Amber sitting on the back seat.
‘I haven’t tol’ either of you. It’s embarrashing.’
‘Told us what?’ asked Dee, glancing at Amber in the rear-view mirror.
‘Math-yoo an’ me have not been,’ Amber paused to think how to phrase her words in her befuddled state, ‘you know, “right” together. For a while. Something ish wrong. He says he’s busy at work. He comes home late, every night. He’s even working weekends. He said it was for us. But I don’t believe him. Do you know how much he shpent on me at Chrissmush? Well I’ll tell yoo,’ said Amber, not bothering to wait for Chrissie and Dee to prompt her. ‘Ten squid.’
‘Ten pounds?’ asked Dee incredulously.
‘Yesh. An’ I can’t remember the last time we had shax.’
‘I think that’s a cross between “shag” and “sex”,’ muttered Chrissie to Dee. She cleared her throat. ‘Okay, girls. Confession time for me too. I haven’t confided in either of you before now, but Andrew and I haven’t been getting along for a while.’ She stared out of the passenger window, her eyes momentarily blurring with tears. ‘Madam Rosa said Andrew is using me. That I was nothing more than a financial purse for him. And the awful thing is,’ Chrissie gulped, ‘she’s right.’
‘What?’ Dee knew Chrissie never splashed her cash, but had assumed it was because of saving for a house deposit.
‘Andrew never has any money. I don’t know what he does with it. He works. But he disappears off to the pub every five minutes with those…those…horrible men that he calls friends. The reality is they’re nothing but losers. I don’t think they work – or can even be bothered to find work. I suspect Andrew is funding their booze and,’ she swallowed unhappily, ‘other stuff.’
‘What other stuff?’ Dee prompted.
‘Drugs.’
‘Drugsh?’ gasped Amber.
‘You’re kidding?’ said Dee.
‘Sadly not. The place stinks of pot, and the other day there was white stuff all over the kitchen work top. Andrew denied all knowledge of it and blamed Mick – one of the guys you tackled earlier on this evening, Dee.’ She took a deep breath. ‘And the little bit of money I’d saved was spent ages ago when Andrew couldn’t stump up his half of the rent and bills. He’s not been paying his way properly for months. And as for sex,’ she shook her head, ‘I can’t remember the last time we were intimate.’
‘Chrissie, you poor love,’ said Dee. She reached across the gearstick to squeeze her friend’s hand. ‘Why don’t you leave him?’
‘I have nowhere to go.’
Dee and Amber were silent. Both of them momentarily considered offering Chrissie a bed so she could escape her depressing relationship. But no sooner had the thought entered their heads, another thought replaced it – neither Matthew nor Josh would want a guest sofa-surfing until alternative digs were found.
‘I keep hoping,’ said Chrissie wistfully, ‘that he’ll change back into the Andrew I fell in love with. That Andrew was sweet and kind and thoughtful. This Andrew is a stranger.’
‘You need to talk to him,’ said Dee. ‘A frank sit-down-and-listen-to-me-you-moron sort of chat.’
‘Yes,’ Chrissie sighed. ‘You’re right. I’ll do that tomorrow. And what about you, Dee? Is everything all right with you and Josh?’
Dee took a deep breath. ‘No.’ Now that she was admitting it to her friends, it somehow hit home harder. ‘I’d like us to move from our flat and buy something a bit bigger. An extra bedroom, for when a baby comes along. And a garden. I’d love a place like yours, Amber.’ Dee slowed the car, put the indicator on and pulled up outside Amber’s house. She looked across at the little property. It stood in the warm glow of footpath courtesy lights. To Dee, it was perfect. ‘But whenever I mention moving, Josh blanks it. And lately he seems to pick an argument over everything and anything. He’s also shredding my self-esteem to pieces.’
‘Never!’ Chrissie gasped. Dee had to be the most poised, self-assured and confident person she’d ever met.
Dee gave a bark of mirthless laughter. ‘Apparently I’m fat, frumpy, unfashionable and have no conversation skills.’
‘He shed that?’ Amber slurred in outrage.
‘And like you two,’ Dee continued, feeling her face flame, ‘we haven’t made love in ages. He said,’ she hesitated for a moment, ‘that I was boring in bed.’
Amber and Chrissie were gobsmacked. There was a resounding silence interrupted only by the tick-ticking of Dee’s blinking indicator, as they sat in the stationary vehicle outside Amber’s house.
‘I hate to say this, said Chrissie tentatively, ‘but maybe we should make an appointment to see Madam Rosa again.’ She didn’t really have a spare forty-five quid to give to someone who professed to know everything. The woman could be playing a very clever game of hoodwinking. But doubt had set in. It would be nice to see Madam Rosa one more time if only to be reassured, and dismiss her earlier revelations as utter tripe. ‘I don’t have her number though.’
‘I do,’ said Amber. She rummaged in her handbag and pulled out the stiff white business card. ‘I agree with Chrishie. We should see the old bat again.’
Dee sighed and stared blankly at the windscreen. She didn’t know what to think. Right now, she was fed up and tired. This had not been a happy evening. ‘I’m not sure,’ she shook her head. ‘Maybe we should sit down with our men tomorrow, and calmly ask them what’s going on – whether they still want to be with us? We should tell them we feel anxious, and want to put things right.’
‘Good idea,’ Chrissie nodded.
‘Yesh,’ Amber agreed. ‘I already have a plan of action, starting tonight.’
‘Oh?’ said Chrissie and Dee together.
‘I’m going to roger him senseless,’ Amber declared. ‘Shtarting right now.’ She blew kisses to Chrissie and Dee, and wrestled with the rear door. It flew open, nearly whacking an oncoming car. A blaring horn made them all jump. ‘Shee you both on Mon’ay,’ Amber said, falling out of the car, ‘an’ let ush hope we all have good newsh.’