Madison

Mike offered to give us a ride home from school, but I asked to stop by Benny's first. I'm hoping that Cathy is working tonight so that I can talk about getting my job back, at least for a few hours each day after school.

In a perfect world, Ashlyn would work there too. Then I wouldn't have to worry about her as much, at least while I can keep her in front of me and out of the trailer for as long as possible.

Benny's isn't that out of the way from school. Blue Hills isn't that big of a town, thank goodness, or I'd be completely screwed. I could manage the walk from school there, if I hustled out of class and didn't leave class late. Getting home when it's getting dark would suck, but I could manage. Maybe I could hitch a ride with Cathy if she'd let me.

We walk inside together, and it's already busy. It's practically an institution in this town. Sure, there's the normal chains around, but most people come here to hang out, to chill like the sign underneath Benny's implies, almost as if there's nothing else to do around here, because there isn't. Unless you can hang out the Club.

Thinking about the club makes me think of Asher again, the way he looked at me, the way he apologized for cussing in front of me. Are people like that usually? I forget manners are even a thing that exists anymore, or rather, that gentleman are out there. They're not normally around me.

"Well look what the cat dragged in." I hear Cathy before I see her.

Mike and Ashlyn grab a booth on the side, where we normally sit, and I go straight to the counter.

"Hi, Cathy."

"Don't 'hi, Cathy' me, girl. Get over here." She comes around from behind the bar, not that she has the space to do so comfortably or the time to waste talking to me. The place is packed already.

She pulls me in a hug and I return it. I used to dream she was my mother sometimes because she's like what I remember her to be, before Dad died, before she morphed into someone who hated me.

"You forget how to get here or something? Where you been?"

"School mostly."

"Don't lie to me. You're playing momma to that sister of yours and running things around the house. It's written all over you." She looks me over. "How is she doing?"

"Ashlyn? She's--"

"No, I know Ashlyn is good. Pretty thing that girl, and smart. And I can see her across the bar with the Conry boy. I know she's good. I'm asking about that mother of yours."

Cathy's voice can boom, but I thank everything that she's trying to be quiet, not that her whisper is all that soft. She's trying.

"She's not around as much. I mean she is, but not anything consistent. We're fine though. I'm managing."

"Managing isn't living, Maddie Rae. A girl like you should be living."

I hesitate to speak to that because I don't want to get upset in front of an audience. I look back and see Ashlyn and Mike joking around, being carefree in a way that I keep faking these days.

I turn back to Cathy.

"I was wondering if you had any hours for me. I don't want to put you out, but--"

"If you weren't going to ask, I was. You tell me when."

"A few hours after school maybe? I might be able to swing some weekends, you know, when Ashlyn is at a friend's house or something. If that's okay."

"We can do that. I'll keep it casual with you until you get back into things, and then we'll settle it proper."

I smile. Cathy is the one person in my life that makes things easy, outside of Ashlyn and outside of Mike.

I hug her again before I can stop myself. She squeezes and then lets me go. "Thank you, Cathy. I can't tell you--"

"So don't. You know you don't need to. Now go eat something. You need it."

I laugh because she's the only person I know who'd want to fatten me up.

I go back to the seat and scoot in next to Ashlyn.

"What was all that about?" She asks. Mike looks up from his menu.

"I'm going to work here some more. Just for a bit after school. Help bring some money in."

"I could try to get a job too. If we need more money." My heart drops at Ashlyn's words. She's eager to help, overly so, and her voice tells me she knows more than I've wanted her to. I don't want her working though. I want her to focus on school.

"Maybe here, you know after I get settled again, I could ask."

"Jessie's uncle has a construction company I could file papers for."

"Let's not get that far yet. We should be good once I start getting things together here."

"Yeah, you don't want to be around a construction yard like that. Not with guys like Marcus hanging around," says Mike.

"Why would Marcus be there?"

"His uncle owns the construction company. He practically lives there."

It's a small town, but I don't pay much attention. I worry about school, about Ashlyn, and try to spend as little time as possible worrying about guys like Marcus. Guys like Asher.

We didn't move here until my dad passed. I doubt he would have liked where we ended up. Who am I kidding? He'd hate that we were in a trailer park at all. He worked too hard, had too much pride, but in a good way, to ever let his family suffer. But he's not here.

"I don't think that sounds like the best idea," I say. I don't want to outright talk smack about her friends though, so it's hard to walk the line.

"Speak of the devil and his posse," Mike's words are jovial, but he doesn't sound happy. I turn to see who's coming in and see Asher, flanked my Marcus, Zach, and Kyle. Reed, the quietest one of the group and the newest addition, isn't with them.

They didn't frequent here when I used to work occasional shifts. Naively, I had hoped that they kept to club and I wouldn't have to deal with them at all.

Asher catches my eye immediately, but then looks away.

I don't know what I expected after seeing them earlier, but I still feel disappointed that his gaze didn't linger nonetheless.