Asher

She never called. Not once last night. Not a text, not a noise. I wasn't surprised, but part of me was still hopeful all the way up until this morning. I checked my phone enough to worry about my sanity.

I don't even know how it would have worked. I swoop in and take her off in my truck? She wouldn't leave her sister. I know that much. Where would I have taken her? I don't know.

I don't even know what I'd be taking her from, but I know she needs out of that place, and I need out of mine.

We're eighteen. We could do it, start over somewhere else.

I have these thoughts before I have the ones that accompany.

College. Responsibilities. Goals. We don't know each other like that. Not yet.

There's a truth in the last bit that hurts like a punch in the gut. I feel like I know her, and that should count for something.

When I park and walk in, I see the guys. A few days have passed since I first made contact with Madison, with them in tow, right here, but it feels like years.

"There he is," says Kyle, and we greet each other. All of us. "Where have you been?"

"When?"

"In general, mother fucker. We can start with last night, and what's this at the club?"

"Yeah, I heard shit was public," says Marcus. He puts out a cigarette on the curb in front of us. He's trying to quit, he says, but he does it when he's stressed, which is often.

"You okay?" asks Jason. He's quiet and steady. Always.

"I'm good. Just bullshit with dad. No big deal," I say, adjusting my bag on one shoulder.

"And Madison?" asks Kyle. And I know the town, at that point, needs to have more shit going on if this is news.

"What about her?"

"You finally in?" Marcus asks. "What's it been? Three days? That's longer than most take."

"Y'all seen her?"

"Avoiding the question," says Kyle. Reed stands next to him, quiet as usual, but he laughs a little behind his hand before turning away.

"Asking another one," I say, growing short with this conversation. I'm not going to share everything. Not about her.

"Yeah, I saw her a few minutes ago. That way," says Jason, gesturing behind him.

I immediately start to walk away.

"And if you miss practice again, Coach will have your ass," says Kyle.

"If Madison is willing to rent it out," adds Marcus, and their laughter is a soundtrack I'm getting to used to hearing as I walk away.

I find her a few minutes later, about to head into class.

I touch her arm and she jumps, not seeing me before. I'm relieved she's here, like some part of me thought she'd find a way to leave before I saw her again.

"Hey," I say.

"Hi," she says, but she doesn't look at me long before looking around at other people.

I touch her arm and get her attention back to me. "You good?" I ask. I want to be casual, but she's acting like she wants to bolt from me, and I don't understand the hot and cold. Not really.

"I'm fine. I told you."

"I know. I just wanted to see if you were okay last night." I sound like a whiny version of myself, a weaker version.

Madison can hear it in my voice, I think, because she finally looks at me. "I'm good. Really." I search her face, and something tells me she's hiding something. I think she's being brave because she doesn't want to burden me, but I don't need her to worry about that.

"Meet with me. Lunch?"

"Okay," she says, nodding.

"Yeah? Okay, we'll meet in the library." I lean down and kiss her on the cheek. The move is sudden, but I had to make contact with her to feel that we still had something.

Madison smiles at me, and it's real. Her cheeks flush again, and I'm struck by how beautiful she is.

People wait for us to separate so that they can enter. I scratch my neck, suddenly self-conscious.

She slips into class and others follow in behind her.

I turn to head back towards the main entryway. Kelsey and her friends are clustered together around the corner.

Kelsey smirks at me, looks me up and down and flicks her red hair over her shoulder. Another one of her friends, a blonde named Brandi does the same, but more discreetly. I guess she doesn't want Kelsey to know.

Regardless, I feel nothing.

She shouldn't have said anything to Madison when there's nothing between us to share. We flirted, yeah, at parties, when I was drunk and she was available. But she's cycled through a lot of people on the team, and I'm not down with that. That's not what I'm looking for. Not anymore.